Paradise Crime Mysteries

by Toby Neal

  “Wouldn’t miss it.” Pono took his jacket from the back of his chair.

  They drove the few blocks between the station and the hospital, and Lei did some relaxation breathing as they got on the elevator for the short trip to the basement, where the morgue was located. She kept hoping it would get easier for her to visit the morgue, but it still took a lot of effort to manage the anxiety triggered by the smells alone.

  “Hey now.” Dr. Gregory was wearing one of his bright yellow, smiley-face rubber aprons today. It was already smeared with dark stains. “Come on in. I guess you’re here about the blonde floater?”

  “You guessed right. Did you find anything on her?”

  “She had a state-issued ID card stuck with her food stamp card way down in her bra. Her name’s Adele Lassiter.” He popped the refrigerator door and pulled the shelf out. Adele was uncovered, and Lei winced internally at the sight of her body, empty as a waterlogged, crumpled sack. She had a farmer’s tan coloring the skin of her face, neck, and arms, and brown roots an inch or so long. The state of her exposed face and skin had not improved since Lei had seen it last. Her breasts hung like empty leather pouches on either side of her ribs.

  “Cause of death is drowning. I sent a blood sample to the lab, but I anticipate that her blood alcohol was very high because her stomach contents consisted of mostly alcohol, mixed with a few Pringles.” He held up a glass vial and gave it a swirl.

  “Did you find any trace on her body? Anything that ties her to Ellen besides the clothes?”

  “That was probably the connection. Yesterday was food stamp day; I’m guessing Adele used up her food stamps, trading them for alcohol, because when I checked her card, it was empty. Then she must have traded some of the booze for Ellen’s clothes.” He held out a plastic bag holding the sodden garments. “For you. You can take them to your lab for some more processing, but I went over them looking for blood, hair, food stains, anything. I couldn’t find anything, but CSI this lab is not.” He handed the bag to Lei.

  “Thanks.” Lei took the bag. “That’s too bad. We’ll have to coordinate with Fujimoto on this. It’s his case, really. But I’m guessing canvassing the homeless is on the agenda. Do you have one of those doctored-up photos?”

  “Sure do.” Gregory picked up a remote and hit a button. The printer whirred, and a photo of their victim appeared. “I didn’t have a lot of time to do the Photoshop necessary to restore her appearance, but this should help with showing it around.”

  “Thanks. You’re the best.” Lei smiled at Gregory.

  “I try.”

  “I don’t know about your apron, Doc,” Pono said. “I get that you’re being ironic, though.”

  Gregory blinked his eyes owlishly behind his magnifiers. “Who’s being ironic? I’m just trying to cheer myself up around here.”

  Lei called Fujimoto as they left the morgue. “I’ll have the clothes down at our lab for further processing,” she said.

  “Whose case is this?” the other detective said, but his tone wasn’t as irritated as she knew she’d be if some other cop with a personal connection to a case got to the morgue ahead of her.

  “I’m sorry. I had a few minutes and thought I’d swing by and check in with the doc,” Lei said. “I’ll submit the clothing to the lab under evidence seal.”

  “Okay. Wait for me to call you next time,” Fujimoto said, and hung up.

  “Guess I better let him work his case,” Lei said. “Anyway, we have to get back to the station because Tadeo’s coming in.”

  “So what’s your plan with this?”

  Lei grinned a toothy smile. “I plan to wing it and see what happens.”

  Eli Tadeo was good-looking, of medium height and weight, with clean-cut mixed Hawaiian/Portuguese features that included dark hair and eyes. Lei hadn’t met Eric, his twin, but she’d seen pictures, and they wore their hair the same way, in a neat razor-cut, slightly longer on top. Eli had a small badge of a beard beneath his lower lip.

  “Hi, Eli. Thanks so much for coming in.” Lei stepped forward to shake the young man’s hand, introduced Pono. “I need to apprise you of your rights and that this interview is being recorded.” She recited the Miranda warning.

  Eli frowned. “I need a lawyer?”

  “That’s your right,” Lei said, with a contemptuous twist to her mouth that conveyed only sissies called for lawyers.

  The door of the interview room opened suddenly, and a handsome dark-haired man who looked exactly like Eli stepped into the room.

  “Sergeant Eric Tadeo,” he said. He shook Lei’s hand, squeezing it too hard. “I work with your husband. We share an office.” He wore an immaculate uniform and was clean-shaven, the only difference in looks to his brother.

  “I heard. That’s very nice.” Lei kept her voice cool and neutral. “What can I do for you?”

  “Nothing. Just here as informal support for my brother.”

  “Well, that’s not necessary, Sergeant.” She didn’t have to call him “sir.” They shared the same rank. “Eli’s just being interviewed. Routine.”

  “There’s nothing routine about it,” Tadeo growled, sitting beside his brother. Lei glanced between them. Their resemblance was remarkable when seated side-by-side. Lei didn’t think she’d be able to tell them apart if they were dressed the same and Eli didn’t have that soul patch.

  “Sergeant, you may observe the interview through the window.” Lei indicated the mirrored glass portal nearby.

  Eric turned to his brother. “Let me call a lawyer.”

  “No need. I’ve got nothing to hide.” Eli folded his arms and stared defiantly at his twin.

  Eric scowled but pushed back out through the door. Lei shifted in her chair, trying to reestablish a connection with the sullen man before her.

  “Okay, then.” Pono, next to her, turned on the recording equipment and sat down beside her.

  “Eli, tell us about your relationship with Shayla,” Lei said.

  “What does that have to do with Makoa Simmons?” Eli asked angrily.

  Lei just looked at him. He tapped his fingers, finally said, “I don’t know what you want me to say. Did I like Makoa Simmons stealing my girl? No. Did I want to get her back from that trumped-up prep-school poseur? You bet I did. Did I have anything to do with his death? Absolutely not.”

  “Well, that’s nice, and now that we have your official statement out of the way, I’d like to ask you why you were calling Shayla when she’d already clearly told you she didn’t want to hear from you.”

  “I thought she might change her mind. I knew he was seeing that blonde friend of hers, too. I figured she’d get sick of playing second fiddle. Shayla was never the type to do second fiddle very well.”

  Lei held up a highlighted phone bill. “Phone calls to Shayla that she doesn’t pick up. Daily, sometimes three or four times a day. Then suddenly the calls stop, and this incoming number appears.” Lei pointed to the circled unknown number. “Who is this?”

  “I don’t know.” Eli folded his arms. “I have an alibi for the time of the murder.”

  “An alibi your brother gave you. Pono’s been following up with that. Pono, how’s the alibi holding up?”

  “Actually, you two look so similar, especially when wearing your baseball league outfits, no one has been able to totally, positively identify if Eli or Eric was there,” Pono said. Eli’s color paled, but he lifted his chin defiantly.

  “Well, I have an idea who this mysterious number is,” Lei said. “I think it’s Shayla. She got a burner phone and began to call you again. Look at the length of these calls.” Lei pointed out the highlighted minutes. “I think she was warming up to you again, Eli, and she asked you for a favor.”

  Suddenly a tap came at the door and Torufu, the big Tongan Lei had worked with on the bomb squad, stuck his head in. “Excuse me. There’s a couple out in the foyer asking for you.”

  “We’ll be right back.” Lei and Pono exited the room, closing the door carefully. Lei m
ade sure it was locked behind them.

  “Who is it?” Lei asked Torufu.

  “Pretty blonde girl and a local guy,” he said, waggling the toothpick he liked to chew between his Chiclet-sized teeth.

  “Wow,” Lei breathed to Pono. “The gang’s all here but Shayla. That sounds like Pippa and Oulaki.”

  Sure enough, Pippa stood to greet them, beautiful as a beach Barbie in a pink sundress. Oulaki stood a little too close to her, glowering around the lobby of the station.

  “Thanks so much for coming in,” Lei said with a huge smile. “What a hassle, Bryan. I’m sorry. Follow me. This is very exciting. I think we’re about to find out who killed Makoa.” Lei glanced back at them as if sure they’d be thrilled about this, but neither of them so much as nodded.

  “I’m here because Pippa asked me to come,” Oulaki said.

  “And we appreciate that,” Lei said. She slowed as they walked past the interview room where Eli Tadeo was stashed, and she saw Tadeo look up and make eye contact with Oulaki.

  Good.

  She escorted the couple into another interview room. “We’re just waiting on one more person.”

  “That had better be Shayla,” Pippa said.

  “I just hope she shows,” Lei said, with a tiny doubting headshake. “Make yourselves comfortable.”

  They sat. Pono turned on the recording equipment and stated names, time, purpose of interview, and the Miranda warning. Lei folded her hands and leaned forward. “Now, Bryan. We’ve got some interesting phone records to ask you about.” She took out the folder with the phone bills and removed his and Pippa’s. “See this? You called Pippa the night before Makoa was killed. Why?”

  “We talk sometimes,” Oulaki said, eyes down as he addressed the table.

  “You see, I have a theory. My theory is this. You called Pippa. She told you Makoa was going to break up with Shayla, maybe ask her to marry him. She may even have told you some important personal news. Did you tell him your news, Pippa?”

  The girl’s skin had paled alarmingly. “No,” she breathed. “But I did tell him Makoa was finally breaking up with Shayla.”

  “Well, you should tell him the rest,” Lei said. “He really needs to know.”

  Pippa turned to Oulaki, and her eyes filled as she said, “I’m pregnant. With Makoa’s baby.”

  Oulaki tensed. He seemed to withdraw into himself, becoming hunched and tight, his arms crossed over his chest.

  “I’m sad for you, Pippa. That’s a lot to deal with alone,” he said, each word pressed out flat through lips that looked stiff. But when Lei glimpsed his eyes, they were alive with mortal pain.

  “You thought you’d fly over to Maui and get rid of your rival,” Lei said. “Get the front room of the Torque house and the girl you’d fallen in love with, all in one stroke.”

  “No,” Oulaki said, but he didn’t say it to Lei. He said it to Pippa. “I would never hurt the man you loved.”

  “Is what she’s saying true?” Pippa asked, ignoring Lei and Pono. “Did you kill Makoa? Did you ever imagine that would make me love you?”

  Oulaki stood, pushing back the chair behind him. To Lei’s astonishment, he dropped to his knees before Pippa.

  “No. Never. You loved him, and I would never hurt someone you loved, even if I thought you deserved more. Deserved better. Deserved someone who loves only you.”

  “Holy crap,” Lei breathed, as Oulaki put his arms around Pippa’s waist and pressed his head into her lap.

  “I will do all I can to make you happy,” he said, his voice muffled. “I know I’m not him, but I’ll be there for you in whatever way I can.”

  Pippa seemed frozen, and then slowly her hands came down to stroke Oulaki’s head, his shoulders. They might as well have been completely alone, for all the attention they paid to Lei and her partner.

  Lei cleared her throat. “Excuse me. That’s all very well, but I think I’m looking at motive here.”

  “I didn’t do it,” Oulaki said, without raising his head. “And I will take care of you, if you will let me.”

  He was still embracing Pippa’s midsection in a way that communicated, more than any words, that he didn’t care she was pregnant with another man’s baby; that he’d care for that child as if it were his own.

  Lei found herself clearing her throat again, because of a lump that had gathered there.

  “We’ll give you a moment of privacy.” Lei said.

  Pippa was crying, tears rolling down her face, but she was still stroking Oulaki’s hair, his shoulders, as he knelt before her. Lei and Pono exited, and the two never looked up.

  “I didn’t see that coming,” Pono said out in the hall.

  “I suspected he might have feelings for her, but I had no idea of the depth,” Lei said. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I don’t know anymore if he’s the guy.”

  “Me neither.”

  They were gathering their resolve outside the door containing Eli Tadeo, when Shayla Cummings came striding down the hall, trailing a uniformed officer from the front desk. She looked amazing: flags of color on her high cheekbones, long brown hair bouncing in fat, flowing curls, a sprigged sundress grazing her knees, and kitten-heeled sandals on her feet.

  “Shayla, you look great,” Lei said, infusing her voice with a warmth she didn’t feel.

  “I have to keep going somehow,” Shayla said. “And find a way to deal with all this stress.” Her big brown eyes filled with tears.

  “Well, we’re sorry to keep having to check in with you about things, but we have one more interview we need to do.”

  Pono opened the interview door and held it ajar, and Shayla stepped inside, immediately pulling up short as she locked eyes with Eli Tadeo, seated at the table.

  “Eli! What are you doing here?”

  “Same as you. Came when MPD called,” Eli said, with that sulky edge to his voice.

  Lei grabbed another chair from the hall and then made sure the door was locked once they were all seated. “I need to review your rights and remind you that this is a voluntary interview.” She recited the Miranda warning.

  Shayla turned accusing eyes to Lei. “I don’t know why I’m in this room with him. I’m sure you know this is my ex-boyfriend, who’s been harassing me and Makoa for months.”

  Eli remained seated, his dark eyes locked with Shayla’s. “I can’t believe you’re saying that.”

  Shayla’s eyes widened in panic, skittering away from Eli’s, as Lei opened the folder of phone bills.

  “I brought you in, Shayla, to check if the two of you were in contact. Were you?”

  “No!” Shayla cried.

  “Yes,” Eli said.

  “Well, I think these phone records tell the tale.” Lei ran her finger down the list of phone numbers. “I was showing Eli and Eric these records earlier, Shayla. The calls Eli kept making to you, which you didn’t take. And then, suddenly, this unidentified burner number appears.”

  Lei took her own phone out of her pocket and, very deliberately, punched in the burner number. The door of the room burst open, and Eric Tadeo, face flushed, stomped across the room. He grabbed his brother’s arm and gave a hard tug. “Eli, we’re out of here.”

  He tugged his brother by force toward the door as Shayla jumped to her feet, clutching her purse and looking around wildly. Lei pressed Send.

  “Let us the hell out!” Eric Tadeo yelled at Lei, his face congested with blood, cords standing out in his neck. Pono rose to his full height, facing down the other man protectively as a tinny beep began in Shayla’s purse.

  Beep. Beep. Beep.

  “You going to get that?” Lei asked. “And everyone can just sit their asses right back down. We’re not going anywhere.”

  Shayla sagged back down into the plastic chair. Beep. Beep. Beep, went the phone in her purse, but she made no move to take it out.

  Lei punched the Off button. “Take out that phone and give it to me.”

  “I don’t have to.”


  “Yes, you do. It’s evidence in a murder investigation,” Pono growled, and held out his meaty brown hand.

  Her own hand trembling, Shayla pulled out a cheap Nokia burner phone and set it in his hand. Lei’s phone number showed clearly in the little identification window.

  “We aren’t talking to you for another minute without counsel present.” Eric’s hand was still clamped around his twin’s arm, just above the elbow.

  “Screw that,” Eli said, yanking his arm out of his brother’s hand. “You always think you know best. You think you can tell me what to do. I’m sick of it. Sick of covering for you.”

  Lei’s heart leaped to trip-hammer speed as the twins confronted each other before Shayla. Shayla’s head was lowered, glorious hair hiding her face as she played with the edge of her dress. Turned toward each other, the twins’ faces were as similar as two sides of a coin.

  “Don’t do this,” Eric snarled. “Shut your mouth. Now.”

  “No. You thought you could have it all. Your pretty wifey, the kids, and Shayla, too.”

  Now Shayla’s head flew up, and she leaped to her feet, pushing her chair back. “What? What are you saying?”

  “What do you think I’m saying?” Eli screamed. “Half the time you thought you were screwing me, you were screwing my brother.”

  Lei watched this revelation settle in on the haughty young woman.

  She screamed. “No! No, you didn’t!” and launched herself at Eli.

  The room erupted into the violence that Lei had sensed simmering under the surface between the brothers and the beautiful woman they’d shared. Lei wrestled Shayla back and cuffed her hands in front while Pono tried to separate the brothers.

  While this situation created a scenario where murder might have occurred between the combatants at the table, this particular drama didn’t constitute any sort of confession. Lei had to push them further.

  “Lawyer, dammit!” Eric bellowed. “I want a lawyer!”

  Lei caught Pono’s eye, and her partner clapped cuffs on the other officer’s arms and dragged him out of the room.

  Technically, neither Shayla nor Eli had asked for representation. As Lei clipped Shayla’s handcuffs to the ring on the steel table, she knew now was the time to strike.