The Flip Side

by James Bailey

  “No, I just always think it’s sad to take down cards after a few days so I keep them up all year until my next birthday and then replace them with the new ones.”

  My football-boot card from Mum and Dad has already been relegated to the bottom of my bag.

  We carry on speaking on her doorstep, most of it nonsensical. I’m really thinking about whether or not I should kiss her.

  “I’ve had such a perfect day.” She smiles.

  “Yes, me too. It’s been brilliant.”

  I so want to kiss her, but I back out and go for a hug. As we let go of each other, we pause, our eyes staring into each other’s, before I head into the illuminated Parisian night, kicking myself for not being braver.

  33

  What on earth are you doing here?” I say as I open the hostel room door, not expecting to see either of them.

  “We’ve come to get our money back.”

  “Stop it, Jake.” Jessie pushes Jake out of the way to give me a hug. “Sorry, Josh, ignore him. We’ve come to help you.”

  “I can’t believe you’ve come to Paris. Come on in.” I welcome them into the empty room, my dorm mates having left for the day. “How long are you here for?”

  “Don’t worry, we’re not going to crash your Parisian romance. I’ve got to be back for school tomorrow and, well, the hotel will probably burn down without Jake there, so we’re only here for the day. Your trip inspired us to do something crazy and the flights weren’t that expensive, so here we are.”

  “That’s very kind, but you really didn’t need to do that.”

  “Josh, let’s not joke. You need our help. We couldn’t let you mess everything up now you’ve finally found her.”

  “Thanks for the faith, guys!”

  “Well, it’s thanks to us that you found Sunflower Girl after all.”

  “Lucy,” I correct Jake.

  “Sorry, Lucy.”

  “No, I know. Even if you went about it in the most devious of fashions, I’m very grateful for everything you did. I just can’t believe you’re here.” I worry that the security at this hostel is so bad that two strangers can walk into a dorm.

  “I hope we haven’t disturbed your plans?” Jessie asks.

  “No. Not at all. I’m seeing Lucy tonight so was just going to plan something nice to do with her after she finishes work.”

  “Sounds like perfect timing, then. You definitely need our help with planning that. We can make sure you remember your card for a start!” Jake teases, as he takes his coat off and perches down on the bottom bunk.

  How long can they go on about that for?

  “Come on, then, what’s this special something you’re planning with Lucy?” Jessie asks eagerly.

  “So I’ve got a few ideas. Shall we get out of here and go and talk them through?” I say, thinking of all the beautiful places we could be in Paris instead of standing in a dingy hostel room.

  “Sounds good. Where shall we go?”

  “I don’t mind. It’s your one day in Paris. You can pick!”

  THIRTY MINUTES LATER, we are sitting on the steps in front of the Sacré-Cœur, alongside hundreds of others, eating crêpes. We watch the stream of tourists flow past along the cobbled street in front, all stopping to get a photo of the impressive church. There is no need for a filter today with the bright blue skies overhead.

  “Why don’t we come to Paris more often? How nice is this? Just sitting outside, eating food, overlooking the city,” Jessie says in a rare break from interrogating me about Lucy.

  “Just think, though. As soon as the quiz airs on TV we won’t be able to do things like this anymore. We will be constantly swamped with fans,” Jake replies.

  “’Course, Jake, that’s definitely going to be a real problem for us. Savor your normal lifestyle now before you’re constantly harassed for autographs and selfies.” Jessie and I laugh to ourselves.

  In front of us, at the bottom of the stone steps, an Italian busker, armed with an acoustic guitar and a microphone stand, starts serenading the burgeoning crowd with his rendition of “Volare.” The crowd laps it up, all swaying along.

  “How’s Jeremy, by the way? What have you done with him?” I say as the busker reaches the end of the song, and I take the last bite of my crêpe. The poor rabbit is being bundled from home to home.

  “I thought you were kidding when you said he was a fussy eater. My God, I thought rabbits ate anything. Not this one. It’s OK, Izzi and Bethan are looking after him today.”

  Do I trust Jessie’s housemates to look after Jeremy?

  I lean to the side as a couple of policemen wearing berets and carrying guns attempt to walk up the steps, while a series of spectators head down to purchase a copy of the busker’s CD. He knows how to work the crowd and seems to be making a fortune. He gets a particularly loud ovation as he alters the lyrics of “No Woman, No Cry” to “I remember when we used to sit on the steps of Sacré-Cœur.” Jake can’t help himself from singing along.

  “I still can’t believe how sneaky you were, arranging that meetup in front of Sunflowers. You know I thought I was meeting you?”

  “Yes, I was quite proud of that, actually. I wished I’d seen your face when Lucy showed up. So is she as great as you remember?”

  “Amazingly, yes. She’s just so easy to talk to, and we really get along. I love how she’s already done loads of cool things. She was telling me yesterday about swimming in the ocean with dolphins, and she wants to travel and see the world, and what have you.”

  “You’d hate that. You can barely stand up in the shallow end of a swimming pool, let alone swim in an ocean.”

  “Very funny. You get my point. We just really seem to click.”

  “We can tell. Since you’ve found her you’ve barely been in touch.”

  “I know, sorry. Mum has been calling nonstop today too, and I’ve not had a chance to call her back either.”

  “No, I’m only joking. We are both so pleased you’ve found her and you’re happy again, aren’t we?” Jessie says, prodding Jake, who is more interested in his crêpe and the music than us.

  “Oh, yeah. So when are we going to meet this mystery woman, then?” He springs to life.

  “Soon. Hopefully. Don’t even think about crashing my date tonight, though.”

  “We promise we won’t. You can check our plane tickets, if you don’t believe us,” Jessie reassures me.

  “When do you think you’ll be coming back? Haven’t you run out of money by now?”

  “So I sold Jade’s engagement ring yesterday,” I break the news to them.

  “You sold it?”

  “Yes, well, I had virtually run out of money after Amsterdam, and I’d brought the ring with me in case I’d need it. . . .”

  “In case you needed to propose to someone else?”

  “Hilarious, Jake, no. If I needed more money urgently. And when I found Lucy, I decided the time was finally right, so I took it to a pawnshop. The cash should keep me going in my luxury hostel for a few more days at least.”

  A caricaturist approaches us, asking if we would like a portrait drawn, and while Jake is keen, we decide it wouldn’t be too flattering, considering we have Nutella smudged around our lips.

  “Anyway, that’s enough questions about me. I want to hear what you’ve both been up to over the last week. Who was that man who answered your phone when I called you the other day? Mr. Nobody?”

  Jessie looks sheepish.

  “Have you not heard? About the personal trainer?” Jake jumps in, excitedly.

  “Of course, that’s where I remember the voice from.” I have a sudden flashback of Adam standing over me while I struggled to complete one push-up. “So are you two together, then? When did this happen?”

  “I suppose so, yes.”

  “Don’t be coy. They’ve been going out since the start of the year.”

  “What? Since before I started at the gym?”

  “The one time you went to the gym!”

&nb
sp; “I wasn’t going to go back there after I got knocked out in that class. It was dangerous.”

  “You spent more time choosing your workout playlist than actually working out!”

  “Stop trying to change the subject. How have you managed to keep this all so quiet? And why didn’t you tell me?”

  “I guess when we started going out, it was just after you’d broken up with Jade, and I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it. Especially with Jake flaunting his new relationship . . .”

  “Oi, I wasn’t flaunting it.”

  “And then I just didn’t want to jinx it after that. We’re taking things very slow, and it’s not really official yet, but yes, it’s going well.” I have to lean in to hear her response now the busker has got everyone clapping along to “La Bamba.” He’s performing as if he is headlining Glastonbury.

  “So the marathon? Did you only run it as an excuse to see Adam more often at the gym?”

  “Well, I’m not going to lie. It did give me a bit more motivation to train.”

  “I thought you were running it to raise money for those poor kids, but it was really just so you could spend more time with some ripped guy. Unbelievable,” I tease her. “What about you, Jake? When are you proposing? I could have sold you my ring!”

  “Not quite yet, but everything is so great. We’re just really enjoying each other’s company, and I don’t know, is it crazy if I say I think he might be the one? Oh God, I sound like you now.”

  “Look at us, all so happy.” Jessie, sitting in the middle, reaches her arms out and hugs us both as we admire the Paris skyline, and the busker and hundreds of other tourists from across the world all sing along to “Imagine.”

  “It’s crazy, isn’t it? The things we do for love. I travel around Europe, Jessie runs a marathon, and you go vegan,” I say to Jake as he savors the last mouthful of his crêpe.

  “Oh crap, don’t tell Jake I had this. What happens in Paris stays in Paris, right?”

  34

  Where are we going?”

  “It’s a surprise. You’ll see soon,” I say, leading Lucy through the dark, lamplit streets of Paris. The yellow glow is reflected in the growing puddles on the cobbled stones. The earlier sunshine has been swiftly replaced by rain.

  “Don’t get too excited, though. I’m not taking you to a cemetery.”

  “I’d hope not, now you’ve made me get so dressed up.”

  I didn’t think she could look any better, but amazingly she does. She’s ditched her jeans for a black long-sleeve dress. Her beautiful dark eyes and full lips are accentuated with a hint of makeup. Elegant silver jewelry wraps around her neck and her wrists. Thankfully Jessie brought me some clean clothes so I look semi-presentable.

  I protect her from the drizzle, holding an umbrella overhead, and take her hand as she stumbles in her high heels on the cobbles. She looks up at me and smiles as she entwines her jeweled fingers with mine.

  “I was thinking this morning, why did your friend send you the Insta page about my search?” It suddenly struck me that this didn’t make any sense.

  “What do you mean?”

  “You said the other day that your friend found the Instagram page. How would she know it was about you? Unless you’d told them about me?”

  “Maybe I did. Maybe I wanted to find you too.” She blushes. “Don’t get too bigheaded though, all right?”

  “No, I’m pleased to hear you felt the same way.”

  “The problem is, I didn’t have anything to go on. I realized after we got separated that we only talked about me, and art. I don’t think you told me anything about yourself, other than that Jessie was running the marathon. I did actually look up names of people who ran the marathon, but I couldn’t find a link to you through any of them.”

  “It’s crazy, isn’t it, that even when you know someone’s name it’s not easy to find them, let alone find someone whose name you don’t know.”

  “We managed to find each other eventually.” She clinches my hand. Her bracelet rubs against my skin.

  It’s hard to believe we’ve only spent a few days together. It feels like we’ve known each other for years.

  My phone vibrates repeatedly in my pocket, but I don’t want to be disturbed as we cross over the river to the Right Bank. Despite the rainy weather, the area is swarming with people strolling hand in hand. To our right, the carriages of the large Ferris wheel in the Tuileries Gardens peek out over the trees.

  “Did you know that the first Ferris wheel was built for the World Fair in Chicago to try and top the Eiffel Tower, which Paris had built for the previous World Fair?” This is one fact I do recall from our TV appearance.

  “You’re not taking me on the Ferris wheel, are you? Don’t even think about proposing!” Lucy jokes.

  “No, don’t worry. I think I’ve had enough of Ferris wheels for a lifetime.” She massages my hand supportively.

  “Come on, tell me where we’re going. Or give me a clue at least.”

  “You really want to spoil the surprise?”

  “Yes! Tell me!”

  “So I had a few options, and Jake and Jessie helped me with them.”

  “I still can’t believe they came to visit you. That’s so nice. I wish they’d stayed so I could have met them too, though.”

  “I’m sure you will get to meet them soon. So yeah, we whittled it down to two options, and then obviously I flipped the coin . . .”

  “You flipped a coin to decide on our date? OK, interesting move.”

  Why did I say that?

  Maybe I should just tell her anyway? It was only Jake who said not to mention it.

  “So yeah, there is something I should probably tell you, actually. It’s a bit of a long story.”

  “Go on.” She smiles at me as we carry on alongside the river path, behind a sea of umbrellas.

  “Basically, since the start of the year, I’ve been carrying a coin with me and I flip it to make decisions and I follow what it tells me to do.”

  “Are you being serious? I can’t tell if you’re joking.”

  “Yes, it was kind of like a New Year’s resolution. At the time I just felt like I didn’t know where I wanted to go in my life, I wasn’t sure what choices to make, I wasn’t happy with the choices I’d made already, so yeah, I came up with this idea.”

  “OK, so you flip a coin for every decision?”

  “Well, it started off as every decision, and I mean literally every decision. I was flipping it to decide what socks to wear, what to eat, what to watch, but as the months have gone on, I normally only ask it a few questions each day, for bigger dilemmas.”

  “And you’ve been doing it all year?” Lucy asks curiously.

  “Yes. I started a couple of days into the year, after everything with Jade. My grandad was flipping a coin. and the idea came to me, so here we are, however many months later into my resolution, and I’m still going.”

  “You get weirder and weirder, don’t you?” She laughs as we cuddle up underneath the umbrella.

  We continue in silence along the riverbank, admiring how beautiful the city looks, even in the rain.

  “Can I ask whether you flipped the coin to decide whether you should come and find me?” she asks after a while.

  “Um, yes, I did. Good thing it said yes, right?” I laugh.

  She doesn’t say anything back, and I suddenly realize how that sounded.

  “Obviously I wanted to come and find you anyway. It was just my mum wanted to set me up with this girl, who is like an old family friend, and then after that I flipped the coin to see whether I should look for you.”

  Lucy takes a moment to process my words. I can feel I’m making the situation worse, not better.

  “So you flipped to decide between me and her?” She looks up at me, her tone switching swiftly from frivolous to serious.

  “No, I don’t mean it like that. That sounds bad.” I laugh nervously now. “See, my mum always says I wanted to marry Elizabeth when I w
as a kid, and I went to her house, and she showed me the nude paintings she’s done . . . and then after that I realized I liked you, so I flipped the coin . . . I’m not really explaining this very well.”

  Stop talking, Josh.

  She lets go of my hand.

  “All I want to know is whether you would be here if the coin hadn’t told you to come?”

  “Well, I guess I don’t know what I’d have done. . . .” I bumble on.

  “Josh, is this all just a game to you? Why does this keep happening to me?” she asks, looking up at the sky. I remember what she told me in the cemetery about the guy she loved who didn’t know if he wanted to be with her.

  “It’s not been a game at all. Honestly.” I try to reach out and touch her arm, but she flinches away and moves out from underneath the umbrella. “You’re going to get wet.”

  I don’t know what to do, what to say. My mind goes blank. She scrunches up her face and shakes her head in disbelief.

  “I’m sorry, but I think that maybe this has all been a big mistake. Like, I barely even know you, and we’re here walking hand in hand around Paris, like we are destined to be together. Maybe I just got carried away with everything, again.”

  “Please, can we just talk about this?”

  “No, not right now, Josh. I really don’t feel like talking. I’m sorry. Maybe it’s not as bad as it sounds, but I just feel like an idiot right now.”

  She can no longer look at me but rather blinks to stop her tears. I feel horrendous, and helpless.

  “Can you just give me some time?” she asks quietly and turns around to walk off ahead of me, into the rain.

  How have I fucked this up?

  Josh, you idiot.

  “I’m sorry, please come back. It’s not like you think,” I shout after her as she sidesteps through the crowds that are crisscrossing the river path.

  I lower my umbrella and try to chase after her but I’m blocked by people walking side by side.

  “Excuse me, excusez-moi,” I say, desperately trying to force my way past a family of four.

  Masses of umbrellas obscure my path and my view. As I rub the rain from my eyes, I can no longer see Lucy. I veer in and out of people, desperately looking for her. It feels like losing her at the marathon all over again, but this time it’s my fault.