by Zack Zombie
Table of Contents
Friday September 13th
Friday, September 13th Later that day. . .
Saturday
Sunday
Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Thursday
Sunday A few days later. . .
Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Thursday
Friday
Saturday
Sunday
Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Thursday
Friday
Saturday
Sunday
Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Thursday
Thursday Later That Night...
Friday October 13th 12:15 am
Saturday
Find out what happens next!
Copyright © 2015 Zack Zombie Publishing LLC
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, scanning, or by any information storage or retrieval system, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other non-commercial uses permitted by copyright law.
This unofficial novel is an original work of fan fiction which is not sanctioned nor approved by the makers of Minecraft. Minecraft is a registered trademark of, and owned by, Mojang Synergies AB, and its respective owners, which do not sponsor, authorize, or endorse this book. All characters, names, places, and other aspects of the game described herein are trademarked and owned by their respective owners. Minecraft ®/TM & © 2009-2016 Mojang.
Friday
September 13th
“Hey, Steve!”
“Wassup, Zombie?”
“Nuthin’ Wassup with you?”
“Just punching a tree,” Steve said. “Hey, what day is it today?”
“I think it’s Friday,” I said.
“Friday the what?” Steve asked.
“It’s Friday the 13th. Why?”
“FRIDAY THE 13th?!!!! No way!”
I could tell from Steve’s face turning a really bright shade of white that something really bad was going to happen.
It’s not every day you can scare the bravest guy in Minecraft.
“Dude, you look really pale. What’s up?”
“Well, remember I told you about that bully who used to bother me a few years ago?”
“Yeah, I think I remember him. The guy with the funny name. . .Harry something, right?”
“Harry O’Brien,” Steve said with a really scared look on his face.
“Hey, didn’t you tell me you stood up to him and he ran away or something?”
“Yeah, he ran away, and no one ever saw him after that,” Steve said.
“Then why are you so scared? I thought he was gone for good.”
“He’s gone, yeah. But not for good.” Suddenly, Steve had a look on his face like something really bad was going to happen.
“Whaddya mean?”
“Well, after I stood up to him, then all of the other villager kids stood up to him too. He was so embarrassed and after that, he just ran away.”
“Serves him right. . .”
“Yeah, well, what no one knew was that he ran away and ended up in the Abandoned Cave.”
Steve said it with his scary voice. Kinda like when you get a really big lump of snot in your throat and you can’t get it out. . .but not as tasty.
“The what?” Now I was starting to get creeped out.
“The Abandoned Cave. You never heard of it? It’s supposed to be haunted with the spirit of the Wicked Witch of the Well.”
“The wicked what of the who?!!!”
“You know, the Wicked Witch of the Well,” Steve said, like I knew he was talking about.
“Who’s that?” I asked, not really wanting to know the answer.
“You never heard of the Wicked Witch of the Well?”
“Uh, no. . .Gulp.”
“Well, she’s a Witch. . .and she, um. . .lives in a well. . .and she’s, uh, wicked. . .really, you never heard of the Wicked Witch of the Well?”
“No. . .who is she?”
“Actually, I really don’t know,” Steve said. “All I know is that she’s supposed to haunt the Abandoned Cave. And she’s supposed to grant you a wish if you’re desperate enough to sell her your soul.”
Now I was really getting scared.
“So, what does that have to do with you?”
“Well, Harry found the Witch in the Abandoned Cave and he made a deal with her to get revenge on me.”
“What the what?!!
“Yeah, crazy, right?” Steve said.
“But, how did you know he did all that?”
“Well, he visits me every Friday the 13th and reminds me of our big fight.”
“What fight?”
“Well, the Witch granted him one wish, and his wish was to fight me to the death on the next October, Friday the 13th.”
“Seriously?!!”
“Yeah. The good thing is there hasn’t been a Friday the 13th in October in a couple years. . .”
“Whew, that’s close,” I said.
“Until this year. . .”
“What?!!!”
“Yeah, this is the only year when Friday the 13th lands in September and October,” Steve said with a scared look on his face. “So next month, I need to fight Harry to the death.”
“What are you going to do?”
“I’ve gotta train, that’s what I’m going to do.” Then Steve jumped up and started punching a tree.
“Uh. . .Steve. . .you think you can beat him?”
“I don’t know. You see, the Witch also gave him special powers so he can beat me. She even gave him a new name.”
“Really, what’s his name now?”
“He calls himself Herobrine.”
CLAPBOOM!
All of sudden, we heard a loud clap of thunder in the background.
“His name is Herobrine?!!”
CLAPBOOM!
“Yeah, Herobrine.”
CLAPBOOM!
“Hey, wait a minute. . .Herobrine.”
CLAPBOOM!
“Herobrine.”
CLAPBOOM!
“He, He, He, Ro, Brine, Brine, Brine. . .”
CLAP, CLAP, CLAP, BOOM, CL-CL-CL-CLAP!
“Man, this is fun!”
“That’s not funny, Zombie. I gotta get ready.”
“Sorry, man. Anything I can do?”
“Naw, I got this,” Steve said, punching blocks out of his tree.
“All right man, I’ll see ya.”
Steve didn’t say goodbye, but I didn’t mind.
I mean, he had to prepare for his death match with this Herobrine character in a few weeks.
CLAPBOOM!
What the what? Hey, I was only thinking that!
Well, anyway. This guy, Hero. . .
CCCLLAA. . .
. . .Uh, I mean, the guy formerly known as Harry O’Brien sounds really tough. Especially with super powers.
I mean, Steve’s tough and all but he doesn’t have special powers.
The only super power he has is punching trees.
And eating loads of cake.
Wow. . .in a few weeks, I might lose the best friend I’ve ever had.
Man, I need to do something!
But what can I do?
. . .What can I do?
Friday,
September 13th
Later that day. . .
After dinner, I decided to go see Steve.
I thought I would cheer him up with a couple of pieces of my mom’s cake.
As I was about to make it to Steve’s house, all of a sudden a ball of fire came out of nowhere and started hovering above Steve’s house.
I saw Steve outside when, suddenly, somebody jumped out of the ball of fire. . .
It was another Steve!
Except this other Steve had glowing white eyes, and he was hovering a few feet above the ground.
“What do you want now, Harry!” Steve yelled at the other Steve.
“I’M NOT HARRY, I’M HEROBRINE!”
CLAPBOOM!
“Yeah, whatever. You’re still Harry to me. Or, what did your mom used to call you? Oh, yeah, Stinky.”
CLAPBOOM!
“WAIT, WHAT. . .THAT SHOULDN’T HAPPEN. IT SHOULD ONLY HAPPEN WHEN YOU. . .”
“Whaddup, Stinky?”
CLAPBOOM!
“HEY, STOP THAT. . .I MEAN IT! OR ELSE. . .”
“Or else what, Stinky?”
CLAPBOOM!
“URRRGGGHHH!!!!”
All of sudden, Steve’s house burst into flames.
BOOOOM!!!
“SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO! URRGGHH! YOU JUST WAIT TILL FRIDAY THE 13TH, YOU GOT YOURS COMING!!!”
Then the other Steve jumped into his fireball and disappeared.
Then Steve ran to put his house fire out.
“Hey, Steve, you need a hand?”
“No worries, I got it.” Steve pulled out a potion bottle with water in it.
Then he threw the potion bottle at the house and a big waterfall appeared over his house and put the fire out.
“Who was that?”
“That was Harry. I told you he comes every Friday the 13th to remind me of our fight.”
“Dude, you gotta fight him? That guy could totally incinerate you!”
“Yeah, probably.”
“Why don’t you just say no?”
“Well, he said if I don’t fight him, then he’ll destroy everybody I care about. . .oh, yeah, and he’ll probably destroy all life on Minecraft too.”
“Seriously?!!!”
“Yeah, so, I need to get back to training!” Steve said, and he started punching trees again.
“Steve, I hate to break it to you but I don’t think punching trees is going to help you against that guy.”
“Yeah, maybe. But we got some really thick trees around here,” Steve said as he continued punching his tree.
“Uh, I have some cake for you. . .my mom made it.”
Steve just looked at me and smiled.
“You eat it. I’ve got training to do,” Steve said as he continued to punch his tree.
“Oh, OK.”
Wow, Steve wasn’t in the mood for cake.
Now I know we’re in big trouble.
Saturday
What the what?!!!!
I got ten Subscribers to my latest Me-Tube Video!
I’m the Man! I’m the Man!
Mmph! Mmph! Mmph! Mmph!
(That’s me doing my happy dance, by the way. . .)
Yeah!
Superstah!
If you didn’t know, I just started uploading some of my sweet gaming skills on Me-Tube.
Me-Tube is like Z-Tube, but for gamers. Kinda like G-Tube, but for cool kids. But nothing like Noob-Tube. . .Eeeww! No way!
I started uploading my videos ’cause I figured if I’m this awesome, I might as well let the world know about it.
Also, I was hoping to make a few bucks with it too.
That’s because my allowance is so small, I can’t even pay attention.
“Hey, Creepy! Check it out! I got ten new subscribers!”
“Really, let me see. . .Whoa, that is so cool.”
“Yeah, I know, right?”
“Hey, how come you don’t turn on the comments?” Creepy said. “Sometimes it’s good to hear people’s constructive criticism, you know.”
“Uh, yeah, I guess so. . .Let me see. . .There! Comments on!”
Blink!
Blink!
“Wow, those comments are really streaming in. . .”
Blink! Blink! Blink!
“Yeah, you probably had a bunch of unread comments that just popped up. What do they say?”
“Let me see. . .Here’s one. . .
“THIS GUY IS A REAL NOOB. . .”
“What the what?!!!”
“Here’s another one. . .
“THIS GUY PLAYS LIKE HE’S GOT SQUARE HANDS OR SOMETHING. . .”
“Huh!”
“Let me see that Zombie,” Creepy said. “Maybe you’re not reading it right. . .Uh, here’s a good one. . .”
“THIS GUY IS PLAYING REALLY GOOD. . .FOR A NOOB. . .HE’S PROBABLY USING A HACK.”
“Hey! If they didn’t like it, why do I have so many subscribers?”
“Oooooh. . .SSSSSSSS. . .I think this next comment explains why. . .”
“ME AND MY FRIENDS SUBSCRIBED TO THIS NOOB’S CHANNEL BECAUSE WE FIGURED HE PROBABLY DIDN’T HAVE ANY FRIENDS.”
“What the what?!!!”
“Sorry, Zombie. But forget about it, man. Those are just a bunch of haters who don’t have anything better to do. They don’t know what they’re talking about.”
Blink!
“YOUR ME-TUBE ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SUSPENDED BECAUSE OF YOUR LOW SKILL STATUS. PLEASE WORK ON YOUR SKILLS BEFORE YOUR ACCOUNT CAN BE REACTIVATED, NOOB.”
“Aw, man!”
“Hey, Zombie, don’t worry. Look, it says you can still upload your videos here. . .”
“PLEASE FEEL FREE TO UPLOAD YOUR VIDEOS ON NOOB-TUBE. . .NOOB.”
“What the wha. . .?!!”
All I could do was sit there and stare at my computer screen wondering why this could be happening to me.
I mean, if the kids on Me-Tube don’t like me, then who even does?
Man, I’m such a Noob.
I think I’m going to change my name. . .
Sunday
I went to go see Steve again to see how he was holding up.
I mean, it’s not every day that a demon makes a threat to wipe your existence off the face of Minecraft.
But I just couldn’t get my mind off those comments those kids said on Me-Tube.
Like, am I really a Noob?
I thought I had some sweet skills. I mean, I beat my little brother about ten times in a row.
And I’ve beat all my friends, even though they’re all Noobs.
And I even beat one of the top Minecraft players once by accident.
Hmm. . . Maybe it’s time I played somebody more advanced.
Somebody like. . .Yeah!
Darius Flenderman. . .The Enderman.
Darius is like the gaming champ for miles around.
Man, if I beat him, then everybody will know I’m not a Noob.
As I was crossing the street to go to Steve’s house, I saw a group of Enderman kids hanging out moving stuff.
Man, I still can’t understand why they do that.
I looked at one of them and just nodded to say, “Wassup.”
“Whatya’ staring at. . .Noob?”
“Uh, nothing. Sorry.”
Man, I forgot. Enderman don’t like to be stare
d at.
So, I made it to Steve’s house and Steve was still out punching trees.
“Sup, Steve, whatcha doing?”
“I’m punching this tree.”
“Uh. . .OK. . .so how are you doing with all the Friday the 13th Demon death match stuff?”
“I’m getting ready! I’ve gotta keep training!” Steve said as he kept punching the tree.
“Hey, isn’t that the same tree you were punching a few days ago? Aren’t you going to try other stuff?
“Like what?”
“Well, why don’t you try the Super-Death-Lock Choke Hold or the Paralyzing Double Slam Back Breaker move. . .You know, like they do on The Ultimate Zombie Fighters or on ZFC’s Body Slammers 3000.”
“I could do that stuff. But, like my old sensei used to say. . . ‘Fear not the man who has punched ten thousand trees, but fear the man who has punched the same tree ten thousand times.”
“Whoa. . . sounds like that guy really doesn’t like trees.”
Steve just looked at me.
“Anyway, you need any help?” I asked.
“Yeah, I need something to practice my punch on. You up for it?”
“Sure.”
Now, I didn’t really think Steve would punch me. Or if he did, I didn’t think he would punch me that hard. . .You know, because I was his friend, right? And, you know, punching trees is really weird and stuff. . .
BOOM!
POP!
All of a sudden, I felt a really strong draft in my nether regions.
I didn’t think much of it until I saw Steve chasing my bony legs around a tree.
Then I heard something that sounded like a balloon deflating.
PSSSSSSSSSS.
When I finally realized what happened, Steve walked over to me and I looked up at his face. Then he burst out laughing.
“Herr, thass nat furry, man. Herp me upf!”
Steve tried to help me up, but without my bones, he couldn’t hold me up for long. So, he just took me and just hung me on a tree branch like an old sheet.