As I was clearing the table, I reached for my phone. I ought to text Nell to say thanks for getting me home OK.
I’d had a message from Hetal a couple of hours ago. As I read it, my blood ran cold. Nell was in hospital? But she’d only been with me this afternoon. Only a few hours ago. And she’d seemed all right. Hadn’t she? Perhaps there had been something wrong and I’d missed it, so wrapped up with my own stuff. I was a totally crappy friend.
Hetal was on her way to the hospital.
‘Jackie, John, I’ve got to go. Nell’s in hospital.’
‘What?’ said Papa John.
Jackie looked shocked. ‘Come on, I’ll drive you.’
I followed her out of the door. It had started raining again. What could be wrong with Nell? Would today be a day I’d always regret for another reason? I shouted at myself to shut up. Who cared about my stupid regrets? It was Nell that mattered now. Nothing else.
Chapter 23
Sasha
The flight had been bumpy and the flight staff grumpy but I didn’t care. I was going home. I couldn’t wait to see Mum. I wondered if Dad had noticed I wasn’t there yet. I’d half expected someone to come running up as I was boarding to say I wasn’t allowed to go, or that my father was waiting outside to speak to me. But there was no running, no nothing. I suppose it wasn’t that late and Dad wasn’t in the habit of waking me in the mornings.
As the plane bumped along the runway at Exeter airport, I turned my phone on. A flurry of messages pinged up.
Dad: Where are you? I am worried sick. Please ring. Please text. I love you. I’m sorry if I have upset you. Please get in contact.
Dad: I’m going out looking for you. If you get back to the apartment, please stay there. I love you x
Dad: Natasha. Please ring me. I just want to know you’re safe. You don’t have to say where you are.
There were seventeen missed calls from him. He had noticed then. Good. Perhaps leaving him to stew a bit longer might be an idea.
There were also twenty-three missed calls from Mum.
Mum: Darling. Whatever has happened, we can sort it. I love you. Please ring me. Or text.
Mum: Please. Sasha, I’m begging you. Ring me.
Mum: Is it something I’ve done? I’m so sorry if it is. Text me.
Mum: If you’ve met someone on the internet, remember, they’re not always who they say they are.
I felt a bit sick reading Mum’s. She tried so hard not to come across as the worried mother, but I knew she was. And to be honest, I’d given her a pretty good reason to be worried – going AWOL in another country would do that.
In between the frantic texts from my parents was one from Nell. She sounded bad. Really bad. I was glad I was nearly home. I scrolled down to Hetal’s text. I only had to read it once. I stood up, pulled my bag from the overhead locker and started pushing my way through the people. I had to get to the hospital.
Once I was finally out of the airport and in a taxi, I called Mum. She answered before the phone even rang once.
‘Sasha? Is that you?’
‘Hi Mum,’ I said.
She burst into tears. I hadn’t meant for her to get upset. Honestly, I hadn’t. I guess I was so busy thinking about getting away from the Dad and Clarisse love party and the whole Pierre disaster that I hadn’t given Mum a second thought.
‘Sorry, Mum,’ I said. ‘I’m fine. No need to panic.’
She was laughing but still crying. She sounded a bit hysterical.
‘No. No one’s panicking. Where are you? Your dad and I have been so worried.’
‘Sorry I’ve worried you, Mum,’ I said again. I was not sorry I had worried Dad.
‘Where are you?’ I could hear her blowing her nose.
‘In a taxi. I’m on my way back. I just landed in Exeter.’
Mum swore. Which is something I think I’ve only heard her do twice in my life. The other time was when Dad said he was leaving. I overheard them while they thought I was asleep, when I was really sitting on the stairs.
‘I’m not coming straight home, though. Nell’s in hospital. I don’t know why, but I need to see her. I’ve got to be there.’
She was quiet.
‘Mum? You still there?’
‘Yes, love,’ she said softly. ‘You are coming home eventually?’
‘Of course,’ I nearly shouted. ‘I’ve missed you like crazy and being with Dad was OK, but then his girlfriend turned up, and she’s soooo young and they were, like, all over each other. Mum, it was totally gross. I thought I was going to throw up, like, most of the time. Then when I thought it was as bad as it could get, they announced their engagement. So, I did a bunk.’
‘He did mention something like that.’ I could tell she was holding her feelings in. She had very strict rules about not undermining Dad. I could imagine her face, concentrating on finding the best way of commenting.
‘So, yes, I am coming home. I can’t wait. But I have to see Nell first. Check she’s OK. You do understand, don’t you?’
‘Completely,’ she said.
‘And will you let Dad know that I’ve come home. Suppose we’d best put him out of his misery.’
‘I’ll ring him straight away. He’s been worried sick.’
That’s odd. Not like Mum to be that concerned about Dad’s feelings.
‘See you soon then.’
‘Yes, bye, love.’
‘Bye, Mum.’
I texted the gang.
Me: I’m on my way to the hospital too xxx
I peered out of the window. It was chilly and raining. Such a difference from the heat of Geneva, but I loved it. The roads started to become more familiar. Soon we were on the outskirts of the town, driving through the streets that I knew inside out. The taxi pulled into the hospital drop-off zone, I paid and hopped out to get my bag. Just as I was hauling it onto the pavement, I heard a shout.
‘Sasha, over here!’
It was Hetal. She was pulling a case too. She waved. I ran over and hugged her.
‘You’ve come straight from science camp?’ I asked.
‘I left as soon as I saw her message and spoke to her mum. How come you’re here? I thought you were still in Switzerland?’
‘I was. Long story. Come on. Let’s go and find Nell.’
We trundled in, dragging our cases behind us. Where would she be? Would we be allowed to just wander in and see her? I spotted a pink-haired girl at the information desk.
‘Oi, Cam!’ I called. The pink head turned.
‘What?’ screamed Cam. ‘I thought you guys were both miles away. How the hell have you made it back so quickly? Oh, sod it. I’m just so glad to see you.’ And she hugged us.
The woman behind the desk drummed impatiently with her nails.
‘Sorry,’ I said to the woman. ‘Can you tell us if Nell Cooper is here, please?’ If it was something major, they could have taken her to the big hospital, but surely she’d be here? The other one was miles and miles away.
The woman tapped on her keyboard and checked the screen. ‘She’s been moved to the ward. Straight down the corridor, last door on the left.’
We all ran off in the direction she’d pointed in, Hetal shouting, ‘Thanks,’ over her shoulder.
We got to the ward door.
‘Is anyone else nervous?’ asked Cam. ‘Hospitals give me a funny feeling.’
I knew what she meant. Us being here to see Nell brought back memories of her accident. Please may she be OK, please may she be OK, I kept repeating in my head. She had to be OK. She was Nell. She always bounced back.
I pushed the door to the ward open and we walked in. At the nurses’ station, I asked which bed was Nell’s. A friendly nurse, who looked like she was juggling a dozen different tasks, pointed at a bed near the window. I realised that Nell’s mum and dad were sitting on chairs beside the bed.
I gulped. Please may she be OK.
Chapter 24
Nell
I must have dozed o
ff, exhausted from the pain. Even when I woke up again, I didn’t open my eyes. I knew Mum and Dad were there and, if I opened my eyes, I’d have to face them. They’d wired me up to a monitor and the blip blip blip was quite a reassuring noise. I’d been moved to the ward, but the doctor had said it was precautionary. I’d heard him explaining it all to my parents. Stress, possibly post-traumatic stress disorder since the accident, all perfectly normal, very treatable, not as scary as it sounds.
The pain had stopped by that point and the relief of having now only an aching body, not a deadly painful one, had made me really sleepy.
‘I’m sorry. She’s asleep,’ I heard my mum say. ‘You’ll have to come back later.’
I opened one eye a tiny crack to see who it was.
There, at the end of my bed, looking totally amazing, were Cam, Hetal and Sasha. What the hell?
‘What on earth are you doing here?’ I was so surprised I sat straight up in bed.
Mum jumped. ‘Don’t worry, love, you don’t have to talk to them if you don’t want to,’ she said, her eyes on Cam’s pink hair.
‘Not want to talk to them?’ I said. ‘Oh, I’ve missed you so much.’
Hospital policy stated that you were not allowed to sit on patients’ beds but my friends either didn’t know or didn’t care. It was a hug pile-on and it was the best hug I’ve ever had. I couldn’t believe that a few hours ago I’d felt so alone and now I was drowning in friends.
‘These are your friends?’ Mum sounded shocked. She knew Hetal, of course, but Sasha and Cam were coming as a bit of a surprise.
‘How about we go get a coffee?’ said Dad to her. She didn’t move. ‘Come on,’ he said again and gently but firmly steered her out of the ward.
‘What are you guys doing here? I thought you were in Switzerland, Sasha?’ How long had I been in here?
‘I was on my way back already,’ she smiled. ‘But what about you? You gave us a bit of a scare.’
‘You can say that again,’ said Cam.
‘Sorry. I’m not exactly sure what happened. Doctors think it was a panic attack. Honestly, though, it felt like I was having a heart attack. I thought I was going to die.’
Everyone was quiet for a minute.
Hetal spoke. ‘It’s true. I read an article about panic attacks. The pain you feel is very similar.’
‘Woah, scary stuff,’ said Cam.
‘How are you feeling now?’ asked Sasha.
‘Better. Much better. It’s all calmed down again now. They’ve put me on this thing, just to make sure.’ I pointed at the monitor. They all looked at it. I watched their faces. They all looked so serious. I hated making everyone worry about me. I wanted them to forget that we were in a hospital and just act like we were sitting on our bench, messing about, chatting.
‘How was Switzerland?’ I asked Sasha. She was looking like she’d seen some sun. Her face shone and I spotted strap lines across her shoulders.
‘Oh, Switzerland was awesome. Shame I had to be there with my dad, that’s all.’
More silence. I wondered what had happened. She’d mentioned in her texts about his girlfriend. But Sasha had her arms folded so I decided not to push it.
‘I kissed a boy,’ Hetal suddenly blurted out.
‘You did what?’ Cam cried. ‘I want details. You kissed him? He didn’t kiss you?’
Hetal was grinning crazier than I think I’ve ever seen her grin before.
‘When? Was it a science geek? No offence,’ said Sasha.
Hetal’s grin didn’t waver. ‘It was this afternoon…’
Cam shrieked. A nurse tutted from across the ward.
‘I’d decided I was leaving. I knew you were in hospital, Nell, so I’d packed up and just had time for a cup of tea.’
Sasha squealed. ‘You kissed him over a cup of tea? Oh, I don’t believe you, Hetal – you are living the dream, girl.’
Hetal laughed. ‘He said he liked me. Then I had to leave. But then I realised I was already regretting not saying anything back. So I ran back, kissed him, told him to call me and left.’
Sasha was laughing hard. ‘I bow before your greatness – you are totally awesome!’
Cam clapped her hands. ‘Brilliant. Just brilliant.’
I looked around the ward. We were making a huge racket. The nurses kept looking over at us. I could feel a wave of noise building in my head and my stomach clenched.
‘Guys, we’ve got to keep it down.’
They stopped instantly and looked at me.
‘We’re in a hospital,’ I said. ‘People are sick.’
They all smiled and nodded, and lowered their voices, but I felt worse. I bet they hated me now. I’m such a killjoy. Always safe and sensible. Obeying the rules. I still felt twitchy about them sitting on the bed. There was a massive sign saying they weren’t allowed to.
Oh, how I wished I could ignore the rules. Follow the big ones, the important ones, but not care about the rest. But I couldn’t tell the difference. Was the sitting on beds one a big one? Bet it was to do with infection or something. Argh, why did I care so much about every stupid damn thing?
‘What do you think, Nell?’ said Cam.
I blinked. I hadn’t been listening.
‘Sorry. What were you saying?’
I saw Sasha and Cam exchange a glance. It was only a tiny one, but I saw it. And when Cam spoke to me, it was slower than normal.
‘Just wondering, if you’re feeling up to it, whether we could go out somewhere next week, on the boat, or into Plymouth.’
There was no way Mum was going to let me out of the house without some sort of tracking device. She’d be double-checking everything I told her and, besides, she’d never let me near the sea, or go as far away as Plymouth.
‘I might have to take a rain check,’ I said. ‘But you guys go ahead without me.’
I didn’t want to stop them enjoying the holidays. It didn’t have to be a nightmare for all of us.
Chapter 25
Hetal
Waking up in my own bedroom, instead of the camp cabin, was glorious. I scrooched down under my duvet and sighed. Home felt so good. Downstairs I could hear Nani singing along to the radio and the smell of a late breakfast was tickling my senses. It smelled like she was cooking the works. Well, it would be rude not to go down and eat it.
Pulling on my dressing gown, I headed to the kitchen.
‘Morning, my gorgeous,’ said Nani, wielding two frying pans. ‘Sleep well?’
‘Yes, thanks. That smells amazing.’ She was making pancakes. The Indian sort. Nani calls them dosa and they are to die for.
‘Thought you might like them.’ Nani checked both pans on the hob. I spotted a pile she’d made already in the oven. ‘So?’ she said. ‘I want to hear all about it.’
I made us both some tea and we chatted and cooked and ate and chatted.
‘How’s your friend doing?’ I asked Nani once I’d eaten one more dosa than I should have.
‘Elsie? She’s quite well at the moment, she says. She emailed only yesterday. She’s off on a tour to see all her family, while she’s still well enough. She’s going all round the world.’
‘Is she coming to the UK?’
‘No, unfortunately not. The nearest she gets is Paris. Her son and daughter-in-law live there.’
I sighed, sad for Nani.
‘What are you going to do today?’ asked Nani. ‘First day back – there must be lots of things you’ve got planned.’
To be honest, I hadn’t really. I was still supposed to be at science camp. I thought about what everyone there would be doing now. Maddy would be stocking up at breakfast before rushing off to her first session, late and chatting non-stop. The thought made me smile. Finn would be there already, catching my eye as I walked in late with Maddy. Was I seriously missing being there?
I thanked Nani for breakfast and went upstairs. Finding my phone, I checked the messages.
Nell: I’m home! Doctors didn’t think it was anythin
g serious so was sent home last night. Thanks for coming to see me – it was so good to see you all. Sorry if I seemed a bit spaced.
Cam: No worries, glad you’re home. Take it easy OK?
Sasha: You’re home! Awesome – now we don’t have to break you out! Xx
I typed an answer.
Me: Yay for being home, Nell. I’m also enjoying being home – I have missed my bed x
Sasha: Haha. You and your bed ☺
My phone pinged. I expected it to be one of the gang. But it wasn’t. It was a number I didn’t recognise.
Hi. So I’m texting rather than calling, as actually ringing people while you’re in a session is frowned on. And I’m hoping I’ll get a trophy for paying attention. Hence texting under a book. Hope your friend is OK. Finn x
I grinned. He was thinking about me. And that little kiss on the end. That was hopeful.
Me: You’ve got to stop texting in sessions. You don’t want to miss out on that trophy by screwing up your last day x
I waited. I could see he was replying.
Finn: Ha. Funny. But not a chance. That trophy is in the bag. Missing you though. Science camp isn’t the same without its star geek x
If I ever needed to prove the theory ‘a text can make you blush’ I’d done it.
Me: Missing you too xx
Summer of no Regrets Page 11