Chapter Thirty-Two
A piece of cereal, the last in Nadia's bowl, bobbed in and out of the milk it shared the porcelain dish with as she idly stirred it with her spoon. It had been three days since she had last spoken with Orion. Oh, they still saw each other during the day and had to occasionally interact, but it had become an awkward experience that neither seemed eager to prolong or repeat. Every time she looked at him, every time she saw those eyes of his, she felt sick. How could she not? Her parents had been right, hell, McClane had been right. Orion had killed people; in as horrible a way as she could imagine, at that. Worse, given his age, it had probably been a lot of people. I mean, your average person these days lives for almost a hundred years, but back in his time they were lucky to hit forty. Assuming he absorbs what's left of their lifespan, he would have had to top himself up every twenty years!
Sighing, she watched her inanimate victim being towed around the bottom of her bowl by her milk whirlpool and scooped it up to put it out of its misery. Putting her bowl in the sink, she caught herself sighing again and tried to distract herself with washing it. Being a single dish and a spoon, this didn't last nearly long enough. Drying it, she reached up to put it in the cupboard and nearly dropped it as she heard the apartment door opening. Turning, she saw Orion calmly walk in, remove his shoes and, spotting her, make his way over to her. Maybe this would be it, their chance to finish their discussion and clear the air.
He stood before her with his perfectly straight posture, took a deep breath, and asked; "May I use your computer?"
Or not. Nadia tried to give him an exasperated look, but flinched away when she met his eyes. "Yeah, sure," was about all she could manage.
Watching him sit and begin doing... whatever it was he was doing, she sighed again and moved back to the table. That was the other thing that had made the past few days awkward; he kept leaving, going who-knows-where and then coming back at any time of the night or day. She could ask him for the spare key back and put an end to it, but suspected that the only thing that would accomplish would be for him to leave her door unlocked when he went. It felt like he was weighing his options; stay or go. She really wasn't sure which side she supported, in all honesty.
Moving into the bathroom, she stared at herself in the mirror for a while. Is this me? Do I just let my problems take care of themselves while I hide from their creepy, soul-sucking eyes? She took a deep breath and shook her head. No, it's not me. I face problems, I solve them and I really want to stop feeling like there's a wild animal in my house, because it's making me jumpy.
Walking back into the living room, she tapped her guest on the shoulder. "I need to talk to you."
Orion turned and then nodded. "I am listening."
She sighed. Oh yeah, that's helpful. Squashing down her frustration, she managed a polite smile. "On the couch, please."
Taking up her usual position, she nodded as he did the same. "Thank you. I know things have been awkward here the past few days, for both of us. I wanted you to tell me about yourself, and I should have been ready to deal with the answers you gave, no matter how unexpected they were. I'm sorry about that."
He shrugged. "It is nothing to apologize for. You are frightened of me now. It is expected that you are no longer comfortable with my being here. I understand that."
One of Nadia's eyebrows inched upwards. "Is that why you've been disappearing and using my computer? You're looking for a new place to hang and have to go see it in person before you move in?" The notion bothered her more than she would have thought. "Let me ask you this, then; why do you keep coming back? You know I could never find you if you didn't want me to, so what's stopping you? Having second thoughts about offing me?"
Orion frowned at her sudden change in demeanour. "No, I am not reconsidering my decision. In all honesty, however, it would not be inaccurate to say that I have considered simply not returning while on my excursions. But my business here is not yet concluded. There are things I must decide upon."
She crossed her arms over her chest, her mood only worsening. "Oh, so it's business, is it? I haven't heard you including me in any of this business, or is it a 'monsters only' club?"
His expression stiffened at her tone, then hardened further at the use of the word 'monster'. "It is not. I simply assumed that you wished for me to leave as quickly as possible and saw no need to involve you in my doings."
"Oh, well, I'm sorry if I got a little weird after you told me you kill people and devour their essences with your eyes," she spat, the acid in her tone flowing quickly now. "I must be a little too human to be okay with that."
His usual neutral countenance had been pushed to one side, and what had taken its place was definitely getting angry. "I had told you that I was not comfortable with the method, either."
She snorted. "Oh, naturally, you'd say it. But it looks to me like you're pretty cozy with your menu selection, considering you're still alive and well. Tell me, is your particular diet high in calories, because I'm sure there are a lot of people out there who would make the switch if you could just refine your pitch into something snappy."
The tone of his voice dropped into a realm of seriousness exceeding his usual stoicism. "Be silent."
She blinked; had he actually snapped at her? She felt a smug little smile creeping onto her face. "Aw, does the soul-eating monster not like it when someone points out the painfully obvious truth?"
His tone was growing harder by the moment. "The obvious truth, Miss Lawson, is that you are childishly immature. It is a part of the reason I have kept you from knowing that I have been researching the umbrella corporation that owns Icarus Development Incorporated. It was also a factor in the decision I made to not share my thoughts or suspicions regarding the matter with you."
She couldn't believe this. And planned to tell him so. "Awesome, so you're cutting me out of my own investigation now? Thanks for that, I'll be sure to jot down that I don't need to thank you for your help on my story anymore. I'll have to leave it somewhere obvious, though, otherwise I might lose track of it, since I'm so immature and unable to handle things. I should check; are you going to do me any more favours before you go? Oh, before you ask, no, I haven't met or fallen in love with any other guys for you to rip away from me; and my parents aren't talking to me right now so you can't instigate another fight between me and them, either."
"No," he replied. "I will do you no more kindnesses, Miss Lawson. Not after today."
Striding to the door, he unlocked it and placed his hand on the knob, but turned back before he could open it. "But I cannot leave without first speaking my mind."
Nadia, exalting in the feeling of supreme catharsis she was experiencing, sat on the arm of the couch. "Oh, good, here comes the speech. I should get popcorn."
Orion's eyes flashed with an expression she had not seen before, but he did not rise to her antagonizing. "I sought only to keep you safe by excluding you from my personal agenda and you say I am hurting you. I protected the lives and well-being of your parents from a matter that had nothing to do with them, but everything to do with me, and you accuse me of purposefully instigating strife between you and them. You call me a monster because I must eventually end the life of someone else to continue existing; would it be so easy for you to endure your own starvation with sustenance within arm’s reach, even if that food was laced with a slow poison? And, finally, you say I tore Thomas from you deliberately, that I cost you the chance to pursue a relationship with him, but never realized the obvious truth. That you knew me and I did not remove you immediately, as I would have done to anyone else. Not because I was evaluating you, but because that attachment echoed inside me in some half-forgotten part of my heart that I long ago thought had been struck dead. I could not bring myself to purposefully harm the only person in this world not to find my existence to be a thing of evil. Do I drain the essences of others? Yes; as sparingly as I can, but yes. And, if you wish proof, then here it is; I have told you of my rapid healing. Did
you really think that such an ability was without its own cost? Those injuries do not merely vanish; they require time to be healed, just as an injury of yours would. But in my case, the time is taken away from my stored essence. The injury itself may be gone in mere days, or even hours, but the effects are more serious than that, because it means I must steal time from another that much sooner. I hide from the world because my veins run with the blood I have all but stolen from dozens, hundred of individuals; I avoid conflict because it only accelerates the rate at which I am forced to add to that tally."
Nadia, struck mute, struggled to come up with something to say as her feeling of superiority crumbled. She did not succeed.
He nodded curtly. "Very well, then, Nadia Lawson, you may continue to demonize me, to blame me for everything unpleasant that has happened to you these past weeks. I assure you that you need never look me in the eye and flinch again."
Opening the door, he stepped out into the hallway. Reaching into his pocket, he produced her spare key and tossed it onto the carpet at her feet. In a haze, Nadia looked down at the metal object, feeling like she was still a few strides behind in this particular race. Looking back up, she saw the door closing; not slammed shut, but quietly left to its own devices. No, no, no! This is all wrong, I should be doing something! Giving herself a firm shake, she bolted to the door and threw it open, but saw the hall was empty.
The faint chime of the elevator closing was the only goodbye left for her to find.
In Icarus' Shadow Page 48