“I’m seeing Jude about the job he mentioned.”
She studied me over the rim of her wine glass. “How do you feel about seeing him again?”
Instead of answering her question, I said, “I’m treating it like a job interview.”
Petal looked over at Maya and then back to me. “What about Maya?”
“What about her? He hasn’t asked. He probably doesn’t even remember I wrote him about her.”
Petal leaned forward and spoke in a low tone. “How are you going to work for your baby daddy and not bring up that he’s a daddy.”
I shrugged. “I haven’t necessarily thought everything through.”
“You’re not going to try and pass her off as someone else’s are you?” There was judgement in her tone.
“No. I probably won’t have to do anything. Like I said, he hasn’t asked me about it which means he forgot or thought I was lying or something. He clearly had no interest in me or her when he left. I don’t know. It’s not like I’m going to bring her to work or see him outside of work.”
She quirked a brow at that statement. “So, he’s let himself go? He’s tubby and bald?”
“No. He still looks good, but all those old feelings are gone.” Maybe if I said it out loud I’d believe it.
She smirked, suggesting she didn’t believe me. “You’re playing with fire here, April.”
“I know, but I’ve been toeing the line, playing it safe, for too long. I can’t let August control my life anymore, nor can I worry about Jude. For once I’m going to run my own life as I see fit.”
“By working for your ex?”
I blew out a breath. “I know it’s crazy, but if he can give me the opportunity to get out from under August then I’m willing to take it. I have to take it. It’s been eight years, Petal. He and I are done. In the past.”
She nodded towards Maya. “That little girl suggests otherwise.”
“It will be fine,” I said standing, feeling a little annoyed and a whole lot guilty. “It’s just a business meeting tonight, and maybe a job. We’re two different people with two different lives.”
“Mmm hmm.” She rose from the couch. “If you say so. I hope you know what you’re doing.”
“I do. I absolutely do.” Okay, well maybe I was winging it a bit, but I was ready for a new adventure. To take control of my life. This seemed like the best opportunity at the moment.
9
Jude
I felt like I was a fucking teenager again as I paced outside the restaurant waiting for April. My palms were sweaty and I was more nervous than the first time I’d gone on a date when I was fifteen.
I’d turned, started pacing back the other direction when April appeared. My heart stuttered in my chest to see her again. She’d always had a girl-next-door type of beauty, but now, all grown up, it was still natural and lovely, but there was something more. A sophistication. An intelligence. Was it because her hair was pulled back? Or the professional outfit that, while sexy the way it hugged her curves, suggested she was taking this as a true job interview and not a dinner date. I wanted to kick myself for that. Yes, I wanted to talk to her about a job, but what I really wanted was to catch up with her. To get to know her again. In my mind, this was a date. What an idiot I was.
I smiled, hoping I didn’t look too eager. “April. You look lovely.”
Was I supposed to shake her hand? I wanted to kiss her. At least on the cheek, but I don’t think that was what potential bosses did to their job interviewees. Fuck, why was this so hard?
“Thank you.”
I opened the door to the restaurant and let her proceed me, her wonderful scent making me yearn for what I’d lost eight years ago. The hostess sat us at a table and handed us menus.
We sat in awkward silence as we looked over our menus. It didn’t used to be like this. In the past, even before we got together, we’d always been open and comfortable around each other.
Trying to break the ice, I asked her, “Remember when I took you to Olive Garden on our one and only fancy dinner date?”
April smiled. “The waiter followed us out to the parking lot to give you your two quarters tip back.”
I looked down feeling the embarrassment that I had felt at the time creep back up in me. I smiled sheepishly. “I didn’t quite understand how things worked back then.”
At least some of the tension between us was lower. If I had to relive past embarrassments to achieve that, I would.
“I promise this time I can afford the meal and a good tip.”
She smiled, but it didn’t seem like it was real. I didn’t see it in her eyes.
Our waitress showed up, and we ordered. I added a bottle of wine also to relax us.
“So, what is this job you have?” she asked, clearly wanting to keep this dinner professional.
Inwardly I sighed. I’d asked her to meet me about the job, I couldn’t be too upset that she was holding me to it.
“Cyrus and I just opened a security consulting firm. We had our first client this morning and he recommended that we hire someone to manage the front of the office. Someone friendly and welcoming.”
“A greeter?” She quirked a brow and I worried that I was offending her by offering her a job that clearly was below her education and experience.
“Not just that. We need someone to deal with the books, invoices, bills, that sort of thing. Some of it will be general admin type things, filing, answering the phone. Cyrus and I are good at what we do, but we’re not necessarily organized or office minded. We’ll need someone to keep us on top of what needs to be done.”
She nodded. “What’s the salary?”
I froze. I’d been all about seeing April for dinner, I hadn’t given much thought to the details of the job, beyond basic admin. I certainly hadn’t thought about salary. I hadn’t even contacted Cyrus to let him know what I was doing.
“What would be fair for someone of your experience?” I asked, hedging my bets.
She told me what she earned right now, which seemed awfully low considering her father started the firm and she worked for her brother. Did she even have a financial interest in the firm or had August finagled that from her too?
“This sounds like it has a little bit more responsibility,” she said. “My job will be to make sure you’re doing yours to the best of your ability, and dealing with all the incidentals so you don’t have to worry about them.”
I nodded. “Yes.” Then I offered her twenty percent above what August was paying. Granted, I was probably doing it to get back at him, but I was certain she’d be worth it.
She countered with a figure that was thirty percent more than what August paid her. At one time, I wanted to give her the world, but had nothing to offer. Today, I had something to offer, but not that much. Not without more than one client.
We haggled a bit while we ate dinner, and I was impressed, even proud, that she was able to assert herself and advocate her worth. In the end, we settled on an amount that was twenty-five percent above what she currently earned.
“Does that mean you’ll take the job?” I asked.
She nodded. “Yes. If you’re offering, and will pay that amount, then yes.”
Halle-fucking-lujah. “Let's toast.” I waved the waitress over and ordered a nicer bottle of wine.
Her smile seemed more genuine when she said, “The wine we have now is better than the bottle I stole from my parents the night we went to the river to watch the stars.”
It was ridiculous how happy it made me that she remembered we’d once been a couple. For a time, I wondered if she’d forgotten. I was thinking I was so insignificant, that I hadn’t warranted space in her memory bank. My time with her had probably been pushed out by all the men who’d come after me while she was in college.
I pushed that thought away and went back to the night along the river with the stolen wine, and how I’d touched her. I told her I loved her that night. I’d hinted that this was more than a summer fling.
I watched her eyes from across the dimly lit table wondering if she was remembering it like I was. Like that night was significant in our relationship. Surely that was why it was still in her memory. I wondered what she’d do if I suggested we drive there again.
She picked up her wine, sipped and put her glass down. Her lips were moist with the wine, and I longed to take her mouth, to taste her. I had to rein in my longing. I needed to take our trip down memory lane slowly. Lead her down the path from when we became friends, and then how we became more. Would that work? Would seeing me and going over the memories bring back her fondness for me? Would it lead her to want to see if the sparks were still there between us? There was only one way to find out.
“Remember when August and I hid with water balloons behind the garage and ambushed you?”
She rolled her eyes. “I got you back. I found the hose and soaked you both.”
I laughed. “You did get us good.”
“You know August was always a sweet brother until he got around you,” she said, quirking her eyebrow at me.
I waved her comment away. “He was doing big brother all wrong. It was his job to torment you. I just helped him find his true calling.”
“Did you ever,” she murmured looking down.
I frowned, hating that the humor left her face, and wondering what she meant? Was August still tormenting her?
Hoping to bring back her smile I said, “You know, that balloon thing was so I could see you in a wet t-shirt.” Okay, so maybe sexual innuendo wasn’t the best idea, especially since I was her boss now, but I said the first thing that came to mind.
Her lips twitched up slightly. “Pervert.”
I laughed, feeling heat come to my cheeks. “I was nineteen. I think pervert is the definition of a nineteen-year-old boy.”
She snorted. “Oh please. The girls in high school were practically throwing their panties at you.”
It was true that I had an easy time with the ladies, but that had mostly been sex. April had been so much more.
“I wasn’t in high school then,” I pointed out.
“Well then, I guess, you’re welcome.”
I arched a brow.
“You got your jollies off of soaking me with water balloons. You should thank me for giving you your sexual rise.”
I laughed. “You’re right. Thank you. It was very pleasant, if I remember correctly.”
“You’re welcome.”
I held up my wine glass. “To old memories and making new ones.”
She smiled, but her eyes held wariness as she held up her wine glass and clicked it against mine. I felt like I was in a losing battle trying to bring back the past. Perhaps that was the problem. The past was gone. But if that was true, why did I want her as much now as I did then. More than I’d ever wanted anyone. Was cupid fucking with me again?
10
April
Going down memory lane felt very dangerous. The minute I asked if he remembered about the wine and going to the river, I felt panic. That night had been a shift in our relationship. We’d gone from having a summer fling to talking about staying together when I went to college. He told me he loved me. We’d made love. The expression on his face now told me he was remembering all that too, and as wonderful as it was, it wasn’t something we needed to go over again. The past was dead and gone. At least it should be. But the mixture of longing and sadness in my heart as I remembered that night told me Jude was still in there.
I was relieved when he brought up the water balloon ambush, as that was before he and I were a thing. Of course, then he admitted that he’d wanted to see me in a wet t-shirt, which was news to me. When we’d gotten together before, he told me he’d had more than friendly feeling for me for some time, but never elaborated.
I wondered if his return to Bismarck meant he’d reach out to August again. I hadn’t mentioned seeing Jude to August, mostly because the last time we talked about Jude, August was being an asshole. But maybe Jude had contacted August. I knew why August wouldn’t tell me about seeing Jude. He wanted us apart. Wanted Jude away from Maya. Oh God, I was as bad as August where Maya was concerned. Except it was Jude’s decision to leave us, I reminded myself.
“Have you talked to August?” I asked, sipping my wine.
His expression fell, and I felt bad for that. I realized I was starting to enjoy myself. Enjoy my time with Jude.
“No. I think it’s safe to say that that bridge is burned.”
“But not ours?”
His jaw tightened. “I don’t think August was ever really my friend. You, I believe you loved me. Once.”
I looked down, having trouble dealing with the intensity of the moment. Especially the “once” comment. I was sure I still loved him, but we were well past making us work, which was the real tragedy.
“I think August was your friend. He just…my parents’ death and the responsibility…he didn’t handle it well.” I don’t know why I was defending August, except that he was my brother, and I did think he struggled to take on everything after our parents died. Of course, now, eight year later, he could relax, especially where I was concerned, but he never did.
Jude shrugged, using his fingers to turn his wine glass by the stem. I’d effectively turned an enjoyable conversation into a downer. Then again, this was our history too. Not everything was wine and roses. Even so, while it was dangerous to relive the love, there was no need to rehash the bad either.
“Are you glad to be back in Bismarck?” I asked, moving away from the subject of August.
He sat back, and looked resigned to move on in the conversation. “Yeah, sure.”
“Where did you go?”
He studied me. “I joined the Navy and trained to be a SEAL.”
My eyes widened. “A SEAL? They’re like the best of the best, right?”
His lips twitched upward and I got the feeling he liked my reaction. “We like to think so.”
It certainly explained how broad and firm his body appeared. It also explained the fierceness I sometimes saw in his eyes.
“What about you, April. Husband?”
I flinched and looked down. “No.”
“August still shooing them away?” he said bitterly.
He wasn’t wrong, so I didn’t respond. Instead I looked down into my nearly empty wine glass.
“Hey, April.”
I looked up.
He was leaning forward, picking up the bottle and pouring me more wine. “Remember when I kicked Daniel Kipson’s ass for you?”
I smiled. “Yes.”
“God that felt good,” he said, refilling his glass. “I always hated that guy. And the way he looked at you…” Jude shook his head.
All the warm feelings that had been growing a few minutes before we got off on negative topics returned.
“So, you did that for you, not for me?” I asked.
He shrugged. “Maybe. Both.” He decided. “I was feeling protective of you, and he was just the type of asswipe to spread untrue rumors to get back at you. I wasn’t going to let that happen. Not to you, April.”
“For time I’d wished you’d done it because you were jealous, not because I was a little sister you were protecting.”
Jude’s eyes flashed with emotion. “I was jealous. Well, not of him because I knew you’d never give him the time of day. But you went out with other guys. Did you ever notice that August and I were often at the same place you were on your dates?”
I gawked. “I thought my parents had sent him to look after me.”
Jude shook his head. “Nope. That was my idea. I told August it was his job to look after you so I was able to convince him to go. But it was all me. Lucky for those boys they never got too handsy.” He made a fist.
My girlie parts flared hot, which was annoying because it was silly to get excited that Jude was jealous and wanted to beat other boys up. I suppose it was the teenage girl in me coming to the surface. Or maybe it was the wine.
We a
te dinner, enjoying light conversation and safe memories. When we finished, he paid the bill, and when I stood to leave, I realized I’d had quite a bit of wine. “Woo…that wine has gone to my head.”
“How about a walk?” Jude said, slipping his hand under my forearm and escorting me out. Somehow this had gone from being a job interview, to a stroll down memory lane, and now possibly a date. Warning bells went off in my head, but I quickly toned them out. Things might have gone badly between me and Jude, but that was then. This was now. We were older. Wiser. More mature.
Of course, the issue of Maya lingered in my mind. Why wasn’t he asking about the baby I told him I was having? Had he put it out of his mind at the time, and so now he had no memory of the letter I sent? What would I do if he did ask me about it? I tuned all that out as well. It had been a long time since I enjoyed a meal, good wine, and the company of a sexy man.
“I wouldn’t mind a walk to clear my head,” I answered him.
We stepped outside, and the air was cool, making me shiver. He took his coat off and put it around my shoulders.
“I’ve never seen you in a suit before,” I said as we started walking.
“I never had a reason to wear them before.” His arm slid around my waist, and it felt so good, so natural, I didn’t shy away from it. Perhaps I was reliving the past, but I really wanted to feel like this again, so I went with it.
“I suppose not.”
“Do you like it? Do I clean up well?” he asked with humor in his voice.
I could feel the heat of a blush on my cheeks. “You never lacked for confidence, Jude. You know you look good in anything.”
I swore his chest puffed out as he grinned. We walked a little further in silence, but I had the feeling he was wanting to say something.
Finally, his fingers tightened on my waist. “Remember the night your parents and August were gone and I came over expecting to see August?”
How could I forget. That night was seared in my brain.
Eight Long Years: A Second Chance Secret Baby Romance (Heart of Hope Book 5) Page 6