Eight Long Years: A Second Chance Secret Baby Romance (Heart of Hope Book 5)

by Ajme Williams

  I’d just put the groceries away when April arrived with Maya.

  “Hi daddy!” Maya rushed in jumping into my arms. I savored her enthusiasm and love for me. I wanted more. I wanted April too, but this, my child wrapping her little arms around me and kissing my cheek, it was hard to feel sorry for myself.

  “Hey sweetie.” I held her tight for a moment and then shifted her on my hip as I looked at April.

  “I brought her a change of clothes, in case you want to have her overnight.”

  I studied her. “What’s going on April?”

  “I just have things to take care of. I can come back later tonight to get her if you want…I just thought—”

  “She can stay.”

  “Yay! Can we make crazy cakes tomorrow?” Maya’s hands pressed my cheeks, pulling my head to look at her.

  “Whatever you want,” I said. I’d find a way to give her the fucking moon if I could.

  “I’ll pick her up tomorrow to take her to camp.”

  “Then you’ll be at work?” I remembered this whole afternoon started by my hunting her down after her resignation.

  She looked down. “It’s better for everyone if I don’t.”

  A string of expletives rattled in my brain, but I held them back so Maya didn’t hear them.

  “We can talk later,” April said.

  Yeah, like we did earlier, I thought.

  “You have fun with your daddy, okay baby?”

  “’k mama.”

  Like a flash, April was gone.

  “Do you like pizza?” I asked Maya, pushing my irritation at April aside so I could focus on what was important at this moment.

  “You know I do, daddy.”

  “Have you ever made pizza?”

  Her blue eyes twinkled. “Are we going to make pizza?”

  “If you want to, yes. The dough and all.” I set her down and she ran to the kitchen. “Plus if you want, I got some stuff for us to do science experiments.”

  Her eyes and mouth rounded. “Really?”

  “I bought things to make a rocket balloon, rock candy, and slime.”

  She clapped. “I can’t wait! Can we do one now, daddy?”

  “Why don’t we start the rock candy. That one will actually have to sit a couple of days before it’s done.”

  “Yes. I want to make rock candy.”

  Twenty minutes later, we had our sugar solution in a jar with a skewer held by a clothespin in it. “Now we wait.”

  Maya peered over the counter watching the sugar liquid. I squatted down next to her to watch it too. She put her arm around my shoulder.

  “This is so fun daddy. I love science.”

  “Me too, sweetie.”

  Next, we made pizza dough and were pressing it onto the pizza pan when there was a knock at the door.

  “Keep at it until the dough reaches the sides,” I said as I wiped my hands on a towel to go answer the door.

  “’K.” Maya looked at me and grinned, her cheeks white with flour. The image made my heart spin. I had the twin feelings of joy at being her father, and anguish at having missed so much of her life.

  A second knock pulled me from my reverie. I went to the door and answered.

  “August.” I put my foot behind the door so he wouldn’t be able to push his way in.

  “We need to talk.”

  “Not now we don’t. Make an appointment.” I started to close the door.

  His hand slapped out. “How much?”

  I frowned. “How much what?”

  “How much money will it take to make you go away?”

  I was flabbergasted. I looked over toward Maya to make sure she wasn’t hearing what was going on.

  I stepped closer to August and lowered my voice, partly so she wouldn’t hear and partly because I wanted to sound deadly.

  “There isn’t enough money in the world to keep me away. And if you don’t stop threatening me, I will sue you for defamation and harassment. And when I do, I’ll have a press conference to tell all of Bismarck what an evil man you are.”

  He smirked, as if he didn’t have to worry, but I saw the flash of concern in his eyes. “No one will believe you.”

  “We’ll find out, won’t we? You might have convinced me that I wasn’t good enough for April before, but I know who I am and what I’m capable of now. I’m all grown up now, August, and I will do anything,” I leaned closer so I could look squarely into his eyes. “Anything, to protect my family. Don’t forget it.”

  “Are you threatening me?”

  “Isn’t that what you’re doing?”

  “Daddy, the pizza dough is ready,” Maya called from the kitchen.

  August’s eyes widened. “Maya?”

  “That’s right. My daughter is here. Now you can leave so I can try to make up for the seven years you stole from us.”

  “Uncle Auggie?”

  Crap. Maya came to the door.

  To his credit, August smiled. “Hey. I’ve missed you.”

  She looked at him and then at me. “Do you know my daddy? We did science together. And now we’re making pizza.”

  “That’s great, Maya.” Those words had to have tasted like vinegar if his expression was any indication.

  “August?” April appeared next to him.

  Jesus, it was like Grand Central Station.

  “What are you doing here?” She looked at me and then August.

  “He was just leaving. Let’s go finish our pizza, sweetie.” I picked Maya up, in case one or the both of them decided to take her with them.

  “Hi mama. We’re making pizza. And we made rock candy.”

  “Wow. That sounds like fun.” She smiled, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “I’ve been looking for you, August. We need to talk.”

  “Good. Have fun.” I started to close the door.

  “They’re not coming to have pizza with us, daddy?”

  “They have to talk.”

  “I want to show them the rock candy.” Maya’s brows pulled together and her mouth formed a little pout. Shit. How did I go against that?

  “Of course.” I opened the door to let them in. “It’s in the kitchen. The glass is probably still hot, so don’t touch it.”

  Maya squirmed in my arms, so I set her down. She charged off to the kitchen and I stepped back so August and April could follow. I wouldn’t lie. I resented the two of them invading my time with her. They’d had seven years and I couldn’t get a few hours without them interrupting.

  “Look mama,” Maya’s voice echoed through the small apartment.

  April looked at me as she passed to go to the kitchen. I couldn’t quite read her expression.

  “Where’s the candy?” August asked.

  “It’s going to grow on this stick. It takes a couple of days. Daddy and I are also going to make a balloon rocket and slime, huh, daddy?”

  “That’s right.” I tried to keep my voice friendly, because everyone in this kitchen loved Maya. That I had no doubt. It was me that was the outsider, but I wasn’t going to let them push me out again.

  “You know, maybe we should let Maya and Jude have their time,” April said, putting a hand on August’s shoulder. “You and I need to talk anyway.”

  August’s jaw tightened but he nodded.

  “Let me walk you out,” I said. “Maya, why don’t you get the pepperonis and cheese out of the fridge.

  “’k daddy.”

  I followed April and August to the door.

  “You know, this isn’t a place to raise a child,” August said.

  “Well, gee August, I didn’t know I had a child until after I got this place,” I seethed. “But now that I do—”

  “We need to all get along for Maya’s sake,” April hissed at us, her eyes darting toward the kitchen probably to make sure Maya couldn’t hear us.

  “Are you mad?” Maya stood in the entryway of the kitchen looking out at us.

  I shook my head. “It’s okay.” She came to me and I picked her
up.

  “You all sound mad.”

  April started to open her mouth, but I interrupted. “Do you have a best friend, honey?”

  “I do. Her name is Sarah and she was in my class last year.”

  “Have you ever not gotten along with her? Maybe argued about something?” I asked her.

  “Jude.” August’s voice was a warning, but what was he going to do? Besides, she was my daughter. Just because he had more time with her didn’t negate my right to talk to her as I saw fit.

  “Sometimes. Like when we want to do different things,” Maya confirmed.

  “Well, your Uncle Auggie and I used to be friends.”

  April bit her lip, clearly not sure this was the right way to go. But I was sick of the bullshit and I wasn’t going to be labeled the problem in this dysfunctional triad.

  “Really?” Maya looked from me to August, who also didn’t appear too happy about my comment. “Did you fight?”

  “Yes.”

  Maya frowned. “What about?” Her little face squished into concern and my love for her flowed even stronger that she was sincerely interested in her father and uncle’s feud.

  “You mom.”

  “Jude, maybe this isn’t the best idea,” April said.

  “It's a terrible idea,” August added.

  “The truth is never a bad idea,” I said.

  Maya nodded. “My teacher says to always tell the truth.”

  “Out of the mouths of babes,” I said, probably feeling more smug than I should. The only person on my side was a seven-year-old.

  “You can say sorry and make up,” Maya said to me. “Then you can be friends again.” She grinned and I wished to hell that the messiness of life was that easy to fix.

  “The problem is, that grownups aren’t as enlightened as you, Maya. Sometimes love or friendship isn’t enough.” I tossed April’s words back at her. She flinched and looked down, I hoped in shame. Then I worried that I’d said something that would have Maya worried she wouldn’t be loved. “The exception is you, of course. We all love you and that will never change. Ever.”

  Maya studied me clearly not understanding why love for her was undying but not for her mother or uncle. The truth was, my love for April was undying, but she didn’t love me back. And August, well, I’m not sure that bridge would ever be rebuilt.

  “Don’t you love daddy, mama?”

  April’s gaze flicked up to me. She was silent for a beat and then said, “Yes. Yes I do.”

  It should have felt good, but it only hurt more. I waited for her to tell Maya what she’d told me. That love wasn’t enough. That August’s needs and demands were paramount, more important than our lives. More important than the three of us being a family.

  April covered her mouth, and a small sob escaped. She stepped toward me and turned to August. I closed my eyes as I realized what she was doing. She was taking a side. She was choosing me. But I’d thought this before. Hours before, actually, and it turned out I was wrong. She’d fucked me and then left me. So I put up my guard. I couldn’t trust April with my heart. Not anymore.

  26

  April

  I couldn’t keep walking away from Jude. Every time I did, a part of me died. I didn’t want August to hurt him and his business, but I couldn’t not love Jude. I couldn’t simply be the mother of his child. I couldn’t bear the way he looked at me earlier at Petal’s when he realized I was still leaving or now like I’d betrayed him. And of course, I had. He’d told me he loved me, and I didn’t answer. He said he could deal with August, but I’d ignored that.

  But now I realized that I had to trust in him that he could overcome whatever August did. That we could. Especially watching him with Maya. He’d been a father for only a few days, and yet took to it like he’d been here since she was born. He loved her, was nurturing her interests, and including her in activities and this discussion, instead of telling her she was too small or too young. And clearly, she felt the same for him.

  I looked up at him, hoping he understood what I was doing. I think he did, but the pain I’d caused him still hung around. Like he wasn’t sure he could trust that I’d stick to this decision. So, it was up to me to make sure he knew I was choosing him and Maya. Our family. Oh God, I’d nearly sacrificed my family because my brother was a jerk. No wonder Jude appeared suspicious of my intentions.

  I turned my attention to August. “You’re my brother August, but Maya and Jude are my family. I need to be with them.” God, I hoped Jude would let me in again.

  August’s jaw tightened and his eyes went dark. “So that’s it. After all I’ve done for you, you’re just going to leave?”

  “Done for her?” Jude growled. He looked at Maya and took a breath like he was reigning in his anger. “You’ve kept her under your thumb. You’ve made her dependent on you—”

  “Jude.” I put my hand on his arm. I needed to prove to August and Jude that I was strong enough to make my own decisions. Maybe before I’d been a wimp, but now I’d prove to them, to Maya and to myself that I was a capable woman. “You took on a lot when mom and dad died. But you also took from me. You took my dreams. You took someone I love. I can’t let you do that anymore.”

  “He wasn’t good enough—”

  “He’s a good man. You know that August. He was always there for you.”

  “He betrayed me.” August’s eyes glared at Jude.

  Jude put Maya down. “Did you get the cheese out?”

  “Yes,” she said looking up at him, and then glancing at me and August like she knew something wasn’t right but wasn’t sure what to think about it.

  “Why don’t we make the pizzas so your mom and August can talk,” Jude said.

  “Okay. He’ll win. He always does,” Maya said, as she headed to the kitchen.

  “Oh?” Jude said casting a glance back at me and August.

  My heart dropped.

  “He doesn’t listen and she gives up trying.” Maya disappeared around the corner.

  I looked at August. “You can choose not to listen, and maybe I’ll give up trying to talk to you, but this situation, with me and Jude, that’s not going away. Nothing you can do will make it go away this time. And if you’re successful at ruining him, which I’m not sure you really could do, we’ll just leave.”

  For the first time since our parents died, I saw August look stricken. I didn’t like that I’d done that to him, but if it made him understand that I was done with his controlling ways, and that he’d lose me and Maya if he didn’t stop trying to interfere in my life, maybe he would listen.

  “If you leave, I’ll have no one,” he said.

  I studied him, trying to understand what he meant.

  “Mom and dad died, and all I had was you,” he said.

  “That’s not true,” Jude said.

  I turned to where Jude was watching us from the kitchen. In the background I saw Maya putting toppings on the pizza.

  “You had me, August. I was there when your parents died. I was there for both of you,” Jude said.

  I turned to August to see his reaction.

  “All you cared about was fu—my sister,” August seethed. “Was that why you were my friend. So you could get into my sister’s pants?”

  “Jesus, August.” Jude entered the room, moving closer to us and talking in a lower tone. “You really believe that? April was a kid when we became friends. No. Jesus, that wasn’t why I was your friend.”

  “Then it was the money, right?” August charged.

  Jude had a baffled expression on his face. “What are you talking about?”

  “You saw a rich kid no one liked that thought if you befriended me you could get some of what I had. And when that wasn’t working, you decided to get it from April. You want her trust.”

  Jude gaped. “Do you really believe that?”

  August simply stared at him defiantly.

  “If I wanted April’s trust, I would have convinced her to elope with me eight years ago. Instead, I
left so that I could become the man she needed and deserved. I did it even though it gutted me. But I wanted your blessing too, August.” Jude shook his head. “Instead, you lied. You stole seven years of time with my daughter. Were you always like that?”

  August flinched. “Like what?”

  “Selfish and cruel? I didn’t see it when we were friends before, but maybe it was always there.”

  August poked himself in the chest. “I did what I had to do to protect April.”

  “The idea that you think you had to protect her from me, the guy you said was your best friend, suggests I was never really your friend.”

  “Well you weren’t, were you? You were taking advantage of my sister.” August moved closer, getting into Jude’s space. To my mind that was dumb. August was a grown man, but Jude was a former SEAL.

  “August.” I put my hand on his chest, and gently moved him back. “Jude didn’t take advantage of me. I seduced him.”

  August kept his eyes on Jude. “You were young—”

  “I was eighteen and knew what I was doing. And Jude tried to stop me.”

  “Not very hard,” August quipped.

  “No. Not very hard,” Jude agreed. “The truth is, August, I had been attracted to April by then and I tried to deny it because she was your sister, but I couldn’t. I loved her. I loved you and your family. I wanted to make a family with her, and you ruined it. You keep trying to make it sordid. Tell me, August, is Maya sordid, because she’s the result of my love for your sister.”

  August jerked back. “Maya is innocent.”

  “Maya is my child. The child I made while loving April.”

  August’s jaw tightened and he turned away.

  “I’m sorry that I betrayed your friendship, August, but I’m going to fight for my family. April will have to make her own decision about me, but I’ll fight for Maya and I know you think you can hurt me and make me leave, but I’m not that kid I was eight years ago. You’ll destroy us both if you try to ruin me.”

  My heart was aching that I was the cause of so much pain for August and Jude. I was concerned that Jude still didn’t realize I was choosing him now.