Complete Works of Plautus

by Plautus

  >HEG.

  . What is he himself? In what esteem is he held there?

  PHILOCRATES

  In the highest, and that by the very highest men.

  HEGIO

  Since, then, he is held in such great respect among the Eleans, as you tell of, what substance has he? — Of large amount?

  PHILOCRATES

  Enough for him, even, when an old man, to be melting out the tallow.

  HEGIO

  What is his father? Is he living?

  PHILOCRATES

  When we departed thence, we left him alive; whether he’s living now or not, Orcus, forsooth, must know that.

  TYNDARUS

  aside . The matter’s all right; he’s not only lying, but he’s even philosophizing now.

  HEGIO

  What’s his name?

  PHILOCRATES

  Thesaurochrysonicocrœsides.

  HEGIO

  That name has been given, I suppose, by reason of his wealth, as it were.

  PHILOCRATES

  Troth, not so, but rather by reason of his avarice and grasping disposition; for, indeed, he was Theodoromedes originally by name.

  HEGIO

  How say you? Is his father covetous?

  PHILOCRATES

  Aye, by my faith, he is covetous. Why, that you may even understand it the better, — when he’s sacrificing at any time to his own Genius, the vessels that are needed for the sacrifice he uses of Samian ware, lest the Genius himself should steal them; from this, consider how much he would trust other people.

  HEGIO

  addressing TYNDARUS as though PHILOCRATES . Do you then follow me this way. (Aside.) The things that I desire to know, I’ll enquire of him.Addressing TYNDARUS. Philocrates, this person has done as it becomes an honest man to do. For from him I’ve learnt of what family you are sprung; he has confessed it to me. If you are willing to own these same things (which, however, understand that I already know from him), you will be doing it for your own advantage.

  TYNDARUS

  He did his duty when he confessed the truth to you, although, Hegio, I wished carefully to conceal both my rank and my wealth; now, inasmuch as I’ve lost my country and my liberty, I don’t think it right for him to be dreading me rather than you. The might of warfare has made my fortunes on a level with himself. I remember the time when he didn’t dare to do it in word; now, in deed, he is at liberty to offend me. But don’t you see? Human fortune moulds and fashions just as she wills. Myself, who was a free man she has made a slave, from the very highest the very lowest. I, who was accustomed to command, now obey the mandates of another. And indeed, if I meet with a master just such as I proved the ruler in my own household, I shall not fear that he will rule me harshly or severely. With this, Hegio, I wished you to be acquainted, unless perchance you your self wish it not.

  HEGIO

  Speak boldly out.

  TYNDARUS

  As free a man was I till lately as your son. As much did a hostile hand deprive me of my liberty as him of his. As much is he a slave among my people, as I am now a slave here with yourself. There is undoubtedly a God, who both hears and sees the things which we do. Just as you shall treat me here, in the same degree will he have a care for him. To the well-deserving will he show favour, to the ill-deserving will he give a like return. As much as you lament your son, so much does my father lament me.

  HEGIO

  That I am aware of. But do you admit the same that lie has disclosed to me?

  TYNDARUS

  I confess that my father has very great wealth at home, and that I am born of a very noble family; but I entreat you, Hegio, let not my riches make your mind too prone to avarice, lest it should seem to my father, although I am his only son, more suitable that I should be a slave in your house, bountifully supplied at your expense and with your clothing, rather than be living the life of a beggar where ’twould be far from honorable.

  HEGIO

  By the favour of the Gods and of my forefathers, I am rich enough. I don’t quite believe that every kind of gain is serviceable to mankind. I know that gain has already made many a man famous; and yet there are occasions when it is undoubtedly better to incur loss than to make gain. Gold I detest: many a one has it persuaded to many an evil course. Now give your attention to this, that you may know as well what my wishes are. My son, taken prisoner. is in servitude at Elis there among your people; if you restore him to me, don’t you give me a single coin besides; both you and him, your servant, I’ll send back from here; on no other terms can you depart hence.

  TYNDARUS

  You ask what’s very right and very just, and you are the very kindest person of all mankind. But whether is he in servitude to a private person or to the public?

  HEGIO

  In private servitude to Menarchus, a physician.

  PHILOCRATES

  By my faith, that person’s surely his father’s dependant. Why really, that’s down as pat for you, as the shower is when it rains.

  HEGIO

  Do you then cause this person, my son, to be redeemed.

  TYNDARUS

  I’ll do so: but this I beg of you, Hegio ——

  HEGIO

  Whatever you wish, so that you request nothing against my interest, I’ll do.

  TYNDARUS

  Listen then, and you’ll know. I don’t ask for myself to be released, until he has returned. But I beg of you to give me him pointing to PHILOCRATES with a price set upon him, that I may send him to my father, that this person, your son, may be redeemed there.

  HEGIO

  Why no; I’d rather send another person hence, when there shall be a truce, to confer with your father there, and to carry your injunctions which you shall entrust him with, just as you wish.

  TYNDARUS

  But it’s of no use to send to him one that he doesn’t know; you’d be losing your labour. Send this person; he’ll have it all completed, if he gets there. And you cannot send any person to him more faithful, nor one in whom he places more confidence, nor who is more a servant after his own mind; nor, in fact, one to whom he would more readily entrust your son. Have no fears; at my own peril I’ll make proof of his fidelity, relying upon his disposition; because he is sensible that I’m kindly disposed towards him.

  HEGIO

  Well then, I’ll send him with a price set upon him, on the surety of your promise, if you wish it.

  TYNDARUS

  I do wish it; so soon as ever it can, I want this matter to be brought to completion.

  HEGIO

  What reason is there, then, that if he doesn’t return, you should not pay me twenty minæ for him?

  TYNDARUS

  Yes — very good.

  HEGIO

  to the SLAVES, who obey . Release him now forthwith; and, indeed, both of them. On being released, PHILOCRATES goes into the house.

  TYNDARUS

  May all the Gods grant you all your desires, since you have deigned me honor so great, and since you release me from my chains. Really, this is not so irksome now, since my neck is free from the collar-chain.

  HEGIO

  The kindnesses that are done to the good, thanks for the same are pregnant with blessings. Now, if you are about to send him thither, direct, instruct him, give him the orders which you wish to be carried to your father. Should you like me to call him to you?

  TYNDARUS

  Do call him. HEGIO goes to the door, and calls PHILOCRATES.

  Enter PHILOCRATES, from the house

  HEGIO

  May this affair turn out happily for myself and for my son, and for yourselves. To PHILOCRATES. Your new master wishes you to pay faithful obedience to your former owner in what he wishes. For I have presented you to him, with the price of twenty minæ set upon you: and he says that he is desirous to send you away hence to his father, that he may there redeem my son, and that an exchange may be made between me and him for our respective sons.

  PHILOCRATES

  My
disposition takes its course straight in either direction, both to yourself and to him; as a wheel you may make use of me; either this way or that can I be turned, whichever way you shall command me.

  HEGIO

  You yourself profit the most from your own disposition, when you endure slavery just as it ought to be endured. Follow me. (To TYNDARUS.) See here’s your man.

  TYNDARUS

  I return you thanks, since you give me this opportunity and permission to send this messenger to my parents, who may relate all the matter in its order to my father, what I’m doing here, and what I wish to be done. To PHILOCRATES. Now, Tyndarus, thus is it arranged between myself and him, that I’m to send you, valued at a fixed price, to my father in Elis; so that, if you don’t return hither, I’m to give twenty minæ for you.

  PHILOCRATES

  I think that you’ve come to a right understanding. For your father expects either myself or some messenger to come from here to him.

  TYNDARUS

  I wish you, then, to mind what message it is I want you to carry hence to my country to my father.

  PHILOCRATES

  Philocrates, as up to this moment I have done, I will take all due care to endeavour that which may especially conduce to your interest, and to pursue the same with heart and soul, and with my ears.

  TYNDARUS

  You act just as you ought to act; now I wish you to give attention. In the first place of all, carry my respects to my mother and my father, and to my relations, and if any one else you see well-disposed towards me: say that I am in health here, and that I am a slave, in servitude to this most worthy man, who has ever honored me more and more with his respect, and does so still.

  PHILOCRATES

  Don’t you be instructing me as to that; I can, still, easily bear that in mind.

  TYNDARUS

  For, indeed, except that I have a keeper, I deem myself to be a free man. Tell my father on what terms I have agreed with this party about his son.

  PHILOCRATES

  What I remember, it is sheer delay to be putting me in mind of.

  TYNDARUS

  To redeem him, and to send him back here in exchange for both of us.

  PHILOCRATES

  I’ll remember it.

  HEGIO

  But as soon as he can that is especially to the interest of us both.

  PHILOCRATES

  You are not more anxious to see your son, than he is to see his.

  HEGIO

  My son is dear to myself, and his own to every man.

  PHILOCRATES

  to TYNDARUS . Do you wish any other message to be carried to your father?

  TYNDARUS

  Say that I am well here; and do you boldly tell him, Tyndarus, that we have been of dispositions for uninterrupted harmony between ourselves, and that you have neither been deserving of censure, nor that I have proved your enemy; and that still, amid miseries so great, you have shown implicit obedience to your master, and that you have never abandoned me, either in deed or in fidelity, amid my wavering, unprosperous fortunes. When my father shall know this, Tyndarus, how well-disposed you have proved towards his son and himself, he will never be so avaricious but that he’ll give you your liberty for nothing. And by my own endeavours, if I return hence, I’ll make him do so the more readily. For by your aid and kindness, and good disposition and prudence, you have caused me to be allowed to return to my parents once again, inasmuch as to Hegio you have confessed both my rank and my wealth; by means of which, through your wisdom, you have liberated your master from his chains.

  PHILOCRATES

  The things which you mention I have done, and I am pleased that you remember this. Deservedly have they been done for you by me; for now, Philocrates, if I, too, were to mention the things that you have kindly done for me, the night would cut short the day. For, had you been my slave even, no otherwise were you always obliging to me.

  HEGIO

  Ye Gods, by our trust in you! behold the kindly disposition of these persons! How they draw the very tears from me! See how cordially they love each other, and with what praises the servant has commended his master.

  PHILOCRATES

  I’ troth, he hasn’t commended me the one hundredth part of what he himself deserves to be commended in my praises.

  HEGIO

  to PHILOCRATES . Since, then, you have acted most becomingly, now there’s an opportunity to add to your good deeds in managing this matter with fidelity towards him.

  PHILOCRATES

  I am not able more to wish it done, than by my endeavours to try to bring it about. That you may know this, Hegio, with praises do I call supreme Jove to witness that I will not prove unfaithful to Philocrates ——

  HEGIO

  You are a worthy fellow.

  PHILOCRATES

  And that I will never in anything act otherwise towards him than towards my own self.

  TYNDARUS

  I wish you to put these speeches to the test, both by your deeds and your actions; and inasmuch as I have said the less about you than I had wished, I wish you the more to give me your attention, and take you care not to be angry with me by reason of these words. But, I beseech you, reflect that you are sent hence home with a price set upon you at my risk, and that my life is here left as a pledge for you. Do not you forget me the very moment that you have left my presence, since you will have left me here behind a captive in captivity for yourself, and don’t consider yourself as free, and forsake your pledge, and not use your endeavours for you to bring his son home again, in return for me. Understand that you are sent hence valued at twenty minæ. Take care to prove scrupulously faithful; take care that you show not a wavering fidelity. For my father, I am sure, will do everything that he ought to do. Preserve me as a constant friend to you, and find out this person so lately discovered. These things, by your right hand, holding you with my own right hand, do I beg of you; do not prove less true to me than I have proved to you. This matter do you attend to; you are now my master, you my patron, you my father; to you do I commend my hopes and my fortunes.

  PHILOCRATES

  You have given injunctions enough. Are you satisfied if I bring back accomplished what you have enjoined?

  TYNDARUS

  Satisfied.

  PHILOCRATES

  to HEGIO . According to your wishes, and to TYNDARUS according to yours, will I return hither provided. Is there anything else?

  TYNDARUS

  For you to return back as soon as ever you can.

  PHILOCRATES

  The business itself reminds me of that.

  HEGIO

  to PHILOCRATES . Follow me, that I may give you your expenses for the journey at my banker’s; on the same occasion I’ll get a passport from the Prætor.

  TYNDARUS

  What passport?

  HEGIO

  For him to take with him hence to the army, that he may be allowed to go home from here. To TYNDARUS. You go in-doors.

  TYNDARUS

  Speed you well.

  PHILOCRATES

  Right heartily, farewell. TYNDARUS goes into the house.

  HEGIO

  aside . I’ faith, I compassed my design, when I purchased these men of the Quæstors out of the spoil. I have released my son from slavery, if so it pleases the Gods; and yet I hesitated a long time whether I should purchase or should not purchase these persons. Watch that man indoors, if you please, you servants, that he may nowhere move a foot without a guard. I shall soon make my appearance at home; now I’m going to my brother’s, to see my other captives; at the same time I’ll enquire whether any one knows this young man. To PHILOCRATES. Do you follow, that I may despatch you. I wish attention first to be paid to that matter. (Exeunt.)

  ACT III.

  Enter ERGASILUS.

  ERGASILUS

  Wretched is that man who is in search of something to eat, and finds that with difficulty; but more wretched is he who both seeks with difficulty, and finds nothing at all; most
wretched is he, who, when he desires to eat, has not that which he may eat. But, by my faith, if I only could, I’d willingly tear out the eyes of this day; — with such enmity has it filled all people towards me. One more starved out I never did see, nor one more filled with hunger, nor one who prospers less in whatever he begins to do. So much do my stomach and my throat take rest on these fasting holidays. Away with the profession of a Parasite to very utter and extreme perdition! so much in these days do the young men drive away from them the needy drolls. They care nothing now-a-days for these Laconian men of the lowest benches — these whipping-posts, who have their clever sayings without provision and without money. They now-a-days seek those who, when they’ve eaten at their pleasure, may give them a return at their own houses. They go themselves to market, which formerly was the province of the Parasites. They go themselves from the Forum to the procurers with face as exposed as the magistrates in court, with face exposed, condemn those who are found guilty; nor do they now value buffoons at one farthing; all are so much in love with themselves. For, when, just now, I went away from here, I came to some young men in the Forum: “Good morrow,” said I; “whither are we going together to breakfast?” On this, they were silent. “Who says, ‘here, at my house,’ or who makes an offer?” said I. Just like dumb men, they were silent, and didn’t smile at me. “Where do we dine?” said I. On this they declined. I said one funny saying out of my best bon mots, by which I formerly used to get feasting for a month; not an individual smiled; at once I knew that the matter was arranged by concert. Not even one was willing to imitate a dog when provoked; if they didn’t laugh, they might, at least, have grinned with their teeth. From them I went away, after I saw that I was thus made sport of. I went to some others; then to some others I came; then to some others — the same the result. All treat the matter in confederacy, just like the oil-merchants in the Velabrum. Now, I’ve returned thence, since I see myself made sport of there. In like manner do other Parasites walk to and fro, to no purpose, in the Forum. Now, after the foreign fashion, I’m determined to enforce all my rights. Those who have entered into a confederacy, by which to deprive us of food and life, — for them I’ll name a day. I’ll demand, as the damages, that they shall give me ten dinners at my own option, when provisions are dear: thus will I do. Now I’ll go hence to the harbour. There, is my only hope of a dinner; if that shall fail me, I’ll return here to the old gentleman, to his unsavoury dinner.