by Plautus
Do what you think is most for my interest.
TOXILUS
to the YOUNG WOMAN, who advances with him . Follow me. To DORDALUS. I’ve brought her, if you are wishful to make any enquiries of her.
DORDALUS
But I want you to be present.
TOXILUS
I cannot do otherwise than pay attention to this stranger pointing to SAGARISTIO , whom my master bade me show courtesy to. What if he doesn’t choose that I should be present together with you?
SAGARISTIO
Yes, but do come.
TOXILUS
to DORDALUS . I’ll lend you my assistance, then.
DORDALUS
You’re lending it yourself as well when you are assisting your friend.
TOXILUS
Examine her. Aside to the YOUNG WOMAN. Hark you, be on your guard.
DAU.
aside . Enough has been said to me. Aloud. Although I am a slave, I know my duty, so that whatever he asks I’ll tell the truth as I have heard it.
TOXILUS
pointing to DORDALUS . Young woman, this is an honorable man.
DAU.
I believe you.
TOXILUS
You’ll not be long in servitude with him.
DAU.
I’ faith, and so I trust, if my parents do their duty.
DORDALUS
I do not wish you to be surprised, if we make enquiries of you about either your country or your parents.
DAU.
Why should I be surprised at that, my dear sir? My state of servitude has forbidden me to be surprised at any misfortune of my own.
TOXILUS
aside . May the Gods confound her! so cunning and crafty is she. She has got shrewd sense: how readily she does say what’s needed.
DORDALUS
What’s your name?
TOXILUS
aside . Now I’m afraid she’ll be tripping.
DAU.
My name was Lucris in my own country.
TOXILUS
The name and the omen are worth any price. Why don’t you make purchase of her? Aside. I was greatly afraid that she would be tripping. She has got herself free.
DORDALUS
If I make purchase of you, I trust that you’ll prove Lucris to myself as well.
TOXILUS
If you do make purchase of her, never, on my word, do I think that she’ll remain your slave throughout the month.
DORDALUS
And so indeed I’d hope, i’ faith.
TOXILUS
That what you wish may come to pass, employ your own energies. Aside. In nothing even as yet has she made a slip.
DORDALUS
Where were you born?
DAU.
According to what my mother told me,in the kitchen, in a corner on the left hand.
TOXILUS
to DORDALUS . This woman will prove a lucky Courtesan for you; she has been born in a warm spot, where full oft there is an abundance of all good things. Aside. The Procurer was taken in when he asked where she was born. She has played him off nicely.
DORDALUS
But I ask of you, what is your country?
DAU.
What should be mine but that where I now am?
DORDALUS
But this I’m asking, what was?
DAU.
Everything that was, do I consider as nothing, since it was, and is not now. Just like a man when he has breathed forth his spirit; why enquire of him who he was?
TOXILUS
aside . So may the Deities kindly favour me, right cleverly. And yet I really do pity her.
DORDALUS
But still, young woman, come, tell me at once which is your country? Why are you silent?
DAU.
For my part, I really am telling you my country. Since I’m in servitude here, this is my country.
TOXILUS
Do cease now making enquiries about that. Don’t you see that she’s unwilling to declare, lest you should recall to her the remembrance of her misfortunes?
DORDALUS
What’s the matter? Is your father in captivity?
DAU.
Not in captivity; but what he had, he has lost.
TOXILUS
She will prove to be born of a good family; she knows how to say nothing but the truth.
DORDALUS
Who was he? Tell me his name?
DAU.
Why should I tell of him, wretched man, who he was? For the present ‘twere proper for him to be called Miserable, and me Miserable.
DORDALUS
What kind of a person was he considered by the public?
DAU.
Not a person more acceptable; slaves and free persons all liked him.
TOXILUS
You do speak of a miserable man, inasmuch as he’s almost lost himself, and has lost his friends.
DORDALUS
I shall purchase her, I think.
TOXILUS
What, still “ I think?”
DORDALUS
I imagine that she’s of a noble family.
TOXILUS
You’ll make riches by her.
DORDALUS
May the Gods grant it so.
TOXILUS
Do you only buy her.
DAU.
Now this I tell you: my father will be here directly, when he knows that I’ve been sold, and will ransom me thus separated from him.
TOXILUS
What say you now Don. What’s the matter?
TOXILUS
Do you hear what she says?
DAU.
For although his fortunes are broken, he still has friends. Pretends to cry.
DORDALUS
Don’t weep, please; you’ll soon be at liberty, if — you have sweethearts enough. Would you like to belong to me?
DAU.
So long, indeed, as I don’t belong to you too long. I’d like.
TOXILUS
How well she does keep in mind her liberty. She’ll be producing you fine hauls. About it, if you are about it. I’ll go back to him. To the YOUNG WOMAN. Do you follow me. To
SAGARISTIO
) I’ve brought her back to you.
DORDALUS
Young man, are you disposed to sell her?
SAGARISTIO
I’d like it, rather than lose her.
DORDALUS
Do you compress it then into a few words; state the price at which she’s offered.
SAGARISTIO
I’ll do so, as I see you wish it. Take her for a hundred minæ.
DORDALUS
That’s too much.
SAGARISTIO
For eighty.
DORDALUS
That’s too much.
SAGARISTIO
There can’t a didrachm be abated from the price which I shall now name.
DORDALUS
What is it, then? Speak out at once and name it.
SAGARISTIO
At your own risk, she’s offered at sixty minæ.
DORDALUS
Toxilus, what am I to do?
TOXILUS
aside to DORDALUS . The Gods and Goddesses are pursuing you with their vengeance, you rogue, for not making haste to purchase her.
DORDALUS
Take them, then.
TOXILUS
Well done, you have got a rich prize! Be off, and fetch the money out here. On my faith, she’s not dear at three hundred minæ.
SAGARISTIO
Hark you, for her clothing there’ll be ten minæ added to this as well.
DORDALUS
Yes, be deducted, not added.
TOXILUS
Do hold your tongue, will you; don’t you see that he’s seeking an excuse to have the bargain broken? Why don’t you be off and fetch the money?
DORDALUS
to TOXILUS, as he is going . Hark you, do you keep an eye upon him.
TOXILUS
Why don’t you then go in?
/> DORDALUS
I’ll go and fetch the money. Goes into his house.
The DAUGHTER of SATURIO, TOXILUS, and SAGARISTIO.
TOXILUS
Upon my word, young lady, you have given us praiseworthy aid, good. and wise, and sensible.
DAU.
If for good persons anything good is done, the same is wont to be both important and pleasing.
TOXILUS
Do you hear, you Persian, when you’ve got the money of him, do you pretend as though you are going straight to the ship.
SAGARISTIO
Don’t teach me.
TOXILUS
Betake yourself back again to our house, that way pointing down the lane through the garden.
SAGARISTIO
You are naming what’s intended to be done.
TOXILUS
But don’t you at once be changing your quarters with the money, I recommend you.
SAGARISTIO
What’s worthy of yourself, do you take to be worthy of me?
TOXILUS
Hold your tongue; lower your voice; the spoil is coming out of doors.
Re-enter DORDALUS, from his house, with a bag of money.
DORDALUS
Sixty minæ of assayed silver are here pointing at the bag , less two didrachms.
SAGARISTIO
What’s the meaning of those didrachms?
DORDALUS
To pay for this bag, or else to cause it to come home again.
SAGARISTIO
Lest you mightn’t be enough of a Procurer, did you fear, wretched, filthy, avaricious creature, that you might lose your bag?
TOXILUS
Pray, let him alone; since he is a Procurer, he isn’t doing anything surprising.
DORDALUS
I’ve judged from omens that I should make some profit to-day; nothing is of value so small to me, but that I grudge to lose it. Come, take this, will you? Holds out the bag to SAGARISTIO.
SAGARISTIO
Place it around my neck, if it is not too much trouble.
DORDALUS
Certainly, it shall be done. Hangs it round his neck.
SAGARISTIO
Is there anything else that you wish with me?
TOXILUS
Why are you in such haste?
SAGARISTIO
My business is of that nature; the letters that have been entrusted me, I want to deliver; and I’ve heard that my twin-brother’s a slave here; I wish to be off to seek him out, and redeem him.
TOXILUS
And, i’ faith, you’ve not badly put me in mind of it; I think that I’ve seen here one very like you in figure, of just the same size.
SAGARISTIO
Why, it must surely be my brother.
DORDALUS
But we’d like to know what your name is.
TOXILUS
What does it matter to us to know?
SAGARISTIO
Listen then, that you may know; my name is Lying- speakerus, Virgin-seller-onides, Trifle-great-talker-ides, Silver-screwer-outides, Thee-worthy-to-talk-to-ides, Wheedler-out-of-coin-ides, What-he-has-once-got-hold-of-ides, Never-again-part-with-it-ides.
DORDALUS
Dear me; upon my faith, this name of yours is written in many ways.
SAGARISTIO
Such is the way with the Persians; we have long names of many words twisted together. Do you wish for anything else?
DORDALUS
Farewell!
SAGARISTIO
And you farewell; for my mind’s aboard ship already.
DORDALUS
You’d better have gone to-morrow, and dined here to-day. SAGARISTIO is going. Farewell! (Exit SAGARISTIO.)
TOXILUS, DORDALUS, and the DAUGHTER of SATURIO.
TOXILUS
Since that fellow’s gone, I may say here whatever I please. This day has assuredly shone a gainful one for you; for you’ve not been buying her, but making a clear profit of her.
DORDALUS
He indeed quite understands what he has been about, in having sold me a stolen woman at my own risk; he has got the money, and taken himself off. How do I know now whether she mayn’t be claimed at once? Whither am I to follow him? To the Persians, nonsense.
TOXILUS
I imagined that my services would be a cause for thankfulness with you.
DORDALUS
Why, yes, indeed, I do return you thanks, Toxilus, for I found that you zealously gave me your assistance.
TOXILUS
What, I, to you?
DORDALUS
In seriousness, yes. By-the-bye, I forgot just now to give some directions in-doors, which I intended to be given. Do keep watch on her. Pointing to the YOUNG WOMAN.
TOXILUS
She’s all safe, for certain DORDALUS goes into his house.
DAU.
My father’s delaying now.
TOXILUS
What, if I put him in mind?
DAU.
It’s full time.
TOXILUS
going to the side of the stage, and calling aloud . Hallo! Saturio, come forward; now’s the opportunity for taking vengeance on the enemy. SATURIO.
SAGARISTIO
See, here I am. Have I delayed at all?
TOXILUS
Well, go you off there at a distance out of sight; keep silence. When you see me talking to the Procurer, do you then make a row.
SATURIO
A word’s enough to the wise. He withdraws out of sight.
Enter DORDALUS, from his house, with a whip in his hand.
DORDALUS
On coming into the house, I lashed them all with the whip; my house and furniture are in such a dirty state.
TOXILUS
Are you returned at last?
DORDALUS
I’m returned.
TOXILUS
Assuredly, I have this day done you many services.
DORDALUS
I confess it; I give you thanks.
TOXILUS
Do you want anything else with me?
DORDALUS
That happiness may. attend you.
TOXILUS
I’ faith, all that indeed I shall surely enjoy at home now; for I shall now go take my place at table with your freed-woman. You, when I’m gone ——
DORDALUS
Why don’t you hold your tongue? I know what it is you want. TOXILUS goes into the house.
Enter SATURIO, in a seeming rage.
SATURIO
If I don’t prove the destruction of that fellow ——
DORDALUS
I’m undone.
SATURIO
And most luckily there he is, himself, before the door.
DAU.
running towards him . Most welcome, my dear father. She embraces him.
SATURIO
Welcome, my child.
DORDALUS
aside . That Persian has utterly ruined me!
DAU.
to DORDALUS . This is my father.
DORDALUS
Ha! — what? — father? I’m utterly undone! Why then, in my misery, do I delay to bewail my sixty minæ?
SATURIO
By my faith, you scoundrel, I’ll give you cause to bewail your own self as well.
DORDALUS
I’m undone!
SATURIO
Come, walk before a magistrate, Procurer.
DORDALUS
Why do you summon me before a magistrate?
SATURIO
I’ll tell you there, before the Prætor. But before the magistrate I summon you.
DORDALUS
Don’t you summon a witness?
SATURIO
What, for your sake, hangdog, am I to be touching the ear of any being that’s free — you, who are here trading in persons, free citizens?
DORDALUS
Let me but speak ——
SATURIO
I won’t.
DORDALUS
Hear me.<
br />
SATURIO
I’m deaf. Walk on — follow me this way dragging him , you villanous mouser after maidens! Follow after me this way, my daughter, to the Prætor.
DAU.
I’ll follow. Exit SATURIO, dragging DORDALUS, his DAUGHTER following.
ACT V.
Enter TOXILUS, from the house.
TOXILUS
to himself . The foe subdued, the citizens safe, the state in tranquillity, peace fully ratified, the war finished, our affairs prospering, the army and the garrisons untouched; inasmuch, Jupiter, and all you other Deities potent in the heavens, you have kindly aided us, for that reason do I return and give you thanks; because I have been fully revenged upon my foe. Now, for this reason, among my partners will I divide and allot the spoil. To the SLAVES in the house, who obey his orders. Come out of doors; here, before the entrance and the door, I wish to entertain my commates with hospitality. Lay down the couches here; place here the things that are usual. Here am I determined that my eagle shall be first pitched; from which spot I’ll cause all to become merry, joyous, and delighted, by the aid of whom those things which I wished to be effected have been rendered for me easy to be done; for worthless is the man who knows how to receive a kindness, and knows not how to return it. Enter LEMNISELENE, SAGARISTIO, and PÆGNIUM, from the house.
LEMNISELENE
My Toxilus, why am I without you? And why are you without me?
TOXILUS
Come then, my own one, approach me, and embrace me, please.
LEMNISELENE
Indeed I will. Embraces him.
TOXILUS
O, nothing is there more sweet than this. But, there’s a dear, apple of my eye, why don’t we at once betake us to the couches?
LEMNISELENE
Everything that you wish, the same do I desire.
TOXILUS
It’s mutual. Come, come-come then. You, Sagaristio, recline in the upper place.
SAGARISTIO
I don’t at all care for it. Give ne but equal shares in what I’ve earned.
TOXILUS
All in good time.
SAGARISTIO
For me that “good time” is too late.
TOXILUS
Attend to the matter in hand. Take your place; this delightful day let’s keep as a joyous birthday of mine. To the SLAVES. Bring water for our hands; arrange the table. The SLAVES obey, and the GUESTS take their places. To you, blooming one addressing LEMNISELENE , I give this blooming wreath. Places a garland on her head. You shall be our governess here. Come, lad, commence these games from the top with a round of seven cups. Bestir your hands; make haste. Pægnium, you are slow in giving me the cups; really, do give them. Here’s luck to me, luck to you, luck to my mistress, luck to us all. This much wished-for day has been sent me by the Gods this day, inasmuch as I am allowed to embrace you a free woman. He drinks.
LEMNISELENE