Her eyes moved onto her own reflection and a frown creased her brow as she kicked her dress away.
“What are you thinking, baby?” I asked, leaning down to speak in her ear. We weren’t touching, but we were so close that I could feel the pull of her like the most powerful magnet in the world.
“I’m thinking about how I’ve used this body to survive all these years,” she said, then held a hand to her chest. “But what was I even protecting, Fox? It’s just flesh and bone, the house of a worthless girl who doesn’t belong anywhere.”
“You belong here,” I said fiercely then took hold of her chin to make her look herself in the eyes in the mirror. “Your worth has nothing to do with this shell you’re in, you were born worthy and you’ll die worthy, Rogue Easton. You could rule the whole world if you’d only see how powerful you are.” She tried to look away, but I didn’t let her.
“Bullshit. I’m disposable, I’ve never known anyone who hasn’t thrown me away. You might want this body, Fox, but you don’t really want me.”
She tried to pull out of my grip again, but I wrapped an arm around her and pulled her back against me in a tight hold.
“I don’t want you because you’re beautiful, baby, I want you because our souls are forged of the very same thing and they’ve been fighting to get back to each other for ten years. You can’t tell me you don’t feel it.” I ran my fingers over her flesh, along her stomach then up between her breasts before dragging my thumb up the length of her neck. Goosebumps rose all over her body and she melted back against me as a shaky breath left her.
“That’s how I know you’re mine, hummingbird.” I bit down on the shell of her ear and her ass ground against my hard cock, making both of us groan. I slid my hand over her right breast, squeezing and circling my thumb over her peaked nipple through the lace of her bra. “I feel you even when you’re not here. But when you are, it feels like this all the fucking time.” I ran my free hand down her stomach, making her inhale deeply as I trailed my fingers over the outside of her panties and her hips bucked a little with need.
“I’m the crime you’re tempted to commit,” I growled as she whimpered for more of my touch. “And you know once you give in, you’ll commit it again and again because of how good it feels to sin with me.”
“Fox,” she half moaned, half begged and I got so hard for her at the sound of her saying my name like that that it practically hurt.
I slid my fingers down onto her clit through her panties and a heady moan left her as I circled them once, giving her just enough to know how good this could be.
“Fox, wait,” she panted as she reached a hand back to cling to my neck, her hips rocking to try and force me to contradict her complaints. “We can’t. I can’t be all in with you.”
I tugged on her nipple and she released a desperate noise in her throat, her nails digging into my neck.
“Stop,” she panted.
“Stop enjoying it,” I countered.
“I’m not yours,” she said breathily. “This doesn’t make me yours.”
“I’m only touching your bra and panties, baby, seems like it doesn’t count to me,” I said, leaning down to bite her neck hard enough to mark her.
“You mean that?” she demanded, her back arching and her whole body coming alive for me. It felt so fucking good and my head was so far gone. I needed her so bad. And I needed her to know what this fire between us felt like when we poured a little gasoline on it.
“I mean it,” I said firmly, taking my hand from her breast and tugging her hair to make her look at me in the mirror and see the truth in my eyes. She sucked her lower lip and I ran my middle finger up and down over her clit, her hips chasing the movement as she tried to steal a kiss from my lips. I didn’t let her, tightening my grip on her hair. This was for her. And she was going to witness every second of it.
I angled her chin so she looked down at my hand on her pussy before dropping my other hand and squeezing her breast in a firm, possessive grasp. She shuddered, leaning back against me and I swear I could feel the heat in her veins, the electricity charging every particle in her flesh.
I needed her to feel good for me, I needed her to see why we were perfect for each other even if I still couldn’t truly have her. I scored my thumb over her nipple, making her moan for me once more and she arched back against me, gasping, panting, falling apart for me. I worked my fingers faster on her clit and she moaned my name again, making an animal growl leave me as I held her upright.
She shivered and tipped her head back against my shoulder and I moved my hand from her breast to her mouth, stifling her cry as she came for me and feeling the warmth of her breaths against my palm, making my cock throb in desperation. God, it felt so fucking hot having her like this. I swear I’d die happy if I could make her mine for even a damn hour.
When her shoulders relaxed, I slid my fingers down between her thighs, rubbing my hand over the wet patch on her panties with a smirk, my head buzzing over the fact that I’d done that to her.
Her cheeks were flushed as I let her go and she turned to me, raising her chin. “You swear that didn’t count towards your delusions that I’m yours?” she demanded and I gave her a sideways grin, painting a cross over my heart.
“Promise, baby.”
“Good.” She walked to my closet, grabbed one of my shirts and disappeared into the en suite, kicking the door shut behind her just like that.
The shower started running a second later and I looked to Mutt who was glaring at me and I rolled my eyes at him before stripping out of my shoes, socks and pants then getting into bed.
I leaned over to open the drawer in my nightstand and pulled out the new toy I’d bought for the little bastard. It was a seagull with a squeaker inside and as he both loved chasing seagulls and had recently finished destroying the duck version of this exact same toy, I was pretty certain I was about to buy my way back into his good graces.
“What’s this?” I said to him, shaking the toy and squeezing it a few times to make his ears perk up. He looked between me and it and I smirked in triumph as I shook it a couple more times then tossed it to him.
The stuffed seagull smacked him in the side of the face as he made zero attempt to catch it then fell off the bed with a soft thump.
Mutt glared at me and I huffed at him in return.
“Seriously?” I demanded. “That’s like an exact copy of your favourite! Plus it’s a freaking seagull – what more do you want from me, dog?”
Mutt cocked his head at me then hopped off the bed. I smiled victoriously as he picked up the new toy, watching him as he trotted over to the door with it before he dropped it down and peed on it. Then he turned his back and kicked his feet at it like he was trying to kick it away and promptly moved to curl up on Rogue’s discarded dress without offering me another glance.
Little asshole.
I grumbled at him, calling him out on being a dick while he continued to ignore me, and I had to get out of bed to clean the fucking puddle off of my floor and toss the brand new toy in the washer.
By the time I returned to my room the little bastard was snoring softly like he was totally at peace with the world.
“I should just drop you to the pound because you won’t house train,” I grouched at him and I swear he farted at me in a challenge.
Before I could get anymore riled up at the little dog, the sound of Rogue singing in the shower drew my attention away from him and I groaned as I came up with all kinds of fantasies about heading on in there and fucking her against the wall of my shower while she was dripping wet.
I cursed my fucking life as I fisted my cock through my boxers, half tempted to just jerk off to relieve some tension, but finding I didn’t want to. Nothing aside from the hot heat of her body was going to be able to satisfy this need in me tonight and fucking my hand alone did not appeal.
I needed a fucking distraction, so I hooked the Dark Fae book off of my nightstand and continued reading. I was right at the
end of the book and shit was going down. To be honest, I was confused. The girl seemed to be lusting after all four guys and refusing to choose between them even though Gabriel was obviously her one and only. I guessed she’d pick him eventually, I’d just figured it would have happened by now.
When Rogue reappeared, I got somehow even harder at the sight of her in my shirt, her hair twisted up into a colourful knot on top of her head.
Mutt started wagging as she approached, like he wasn’t a devil in dog form and she tickled his ears before climbing into the bed with me and the scent of my body wash on her skin made me feel so fucking good. My instincts were burning, telling me she was mine and urging me to try and claim all of her, but I’d made her a promise that tonight didn’t count. And I wasn’t gonna be an asshole about it. I was just glad to have taken my first orgasm from her at last.
She rolled towards me, her head resting on the pillow beside mine and I studied her face as she closed her eyes.
“Stop staring, Badger,” she said and a grin hooked up my lips.
“I have a question.”
“What is it?” she asked sleepily.
“What do you want?” I shifted closer to her. “I think I forgot to ask before now.”
She cracked an eye, frowning at me before shutting it again. “That’s a big question with an impossible answer, Badge.”
“Answer it anyway,” I urged.
She remained quiet for a while like she wasn’t sure if she wanted to tell me, but she finally did. “I want what I had when I was fifteen, riding waves with my boys and knowing no matter what happened, we’d be okay. Because we had each other.”
I sighed, rolling onto my back as a crushing weight fell on my chest. “So you want the one thing I can’t give you.”
She shifted closer, wrapping her arm around me and laying her head over my heart. It eased the cloying despair in my chest so I just held her, closing my eyes and pretending we were at Sinners’ Playground, sleeping between the Pac Man and Space Invaders machines. But then I thought of Chase there too and I held her even tighter, my jaw clenched as I tried not to lean into that pain and just steal some peace with Rogue for once.
“I know you need it too,” she whispered just as I was falling asleep. “I’m sorry I can’t give you it either.”
***
“Shit, we need to put everything back where we found it and get the hell out of here,” JJ said in a panic.
I stared at the symbol on the medallion in my hand in fear before looking around at my friends’ pale faces.
“Um, guys, it gets worse. Far fucking worse,” Chase called and I looked over to where he was standing peering in a doorway with a cigarette between his lips. We moved after him and I smelled the death before I saw it. He pushed the door wide and I took in the bodies lying everywhere in there, bloody and mutilated, their faces twisted in death.
“Oh fuck,” Rogue gasped and I reached for her hand, stuffing the medallion into my pocket as I tried to remember exactly where we’d found it.
“Holy shit, look at this.” I turned at Maverick’s voice, finding him with a bottle of vodka in his hand with what looked like a thumb floating in it.
“Put it down,” Rogue hissed like she feared his fingerprints being on that thing and she pulled out of my grip, taking it from his hand. A large wave rocked the boat at that moment and it slipped from her fingers, crashing to the deck and vodka spilled across it along with the severed thumb.
JJ bumped into Chase and I moved to brace them, but my foot slipped on the vodka and I crashed to the floor, taking Chase out with me. His cigarette popped form his lips, hitting the deck in a shower of sparks and the vodka caught alight in a blaze.
JJ hauled us upright as another wave made the boat rock wildly and Rogue and Maverick clung onto each other so they didn’t fall.
“I told you there was a fucking storm coming in tonight,” JJ said in alarm. “We shouldn’t have come out here.”
“Keep your panties on,” Maverick barked, but the fire flared in his eyes and we all scrambled to get out of its way, scrambling towards the stairs that led back up to the top deck.
The fire flared hotter and Chase pushed me along as we all started running up the stairs, the heat of the flames washing over my back.
I kept my gaze on Rogue ahead of us as Maverick clung onto her hand and we all gasped as the boat rocked wildly once more. I leapt up a step, cushioning Rogue as she skidded sideways towards the wall. My head impacted with it but she thumped harmlessly against my chest and I pushed her up the next step, encouraging her to keep going as Maverick tugged her along. I threw a glance back to make sure Chase and JJ were right behind me, my heart thrashing at the sight of the spreading flames at their heels.
“Go!” JJ cried and I damn well did, racing along with all of them as we made it to the top deck and dove over the railing. I plunged into the ocean and the moment I resurfaced, we all started swimming for my dad’s speedboat which we’d tied off beside the yacht.
Maverick heaved himself up first, pulling Rogue after him before they both worked to help the rest of us out of the water. Chase ran to start the motor and we tore away toward the shore, staring back at the yacht as the fire crept into view on the top deck. I wrapped my arm around Rogue’s shoulders and JJ took her hand on her other side while Chase and Maverick closed in tight around us.
“We’re fucked,” JJ whispered.
“We’re not,” I growled fiercely. “Only we know we were there. So all we have to do is never tell another soul. Swear it.”
“I swear,” they all said straight away, and I felt the power of that oath binding us somehow deeper than we already were.
I left Rogue to sleep in my bed while I went for a run in the morning, shaking off the ghosts of the past as I soaked in the morning sun and reminded myself our secret was still locked firmly away in the Rosewood crypt. When I got home, JJ’s voice carried to me from the patio.
“-yeah like that. Can you feel me inside you so fucking deep?”
My heart lurched and some crazy, wild thought entered my head that had no fucking place in existing. There’s only one girl in this house right now.
I ran to the kitchen, stepping out onto the patio and my eyes fell on JJ laying on a sun lounger in some hot pink shorts with a burner phone tucked against his ear.
“Call me by my name, big boy,” he purred then smirked as he noticed me and hit the speakerphone.
“Hung,” a man’s voice said breathily.
“My full name,” JJ growled in a domineering tone then casually sipped some coffee from his bright yellow Pikachu mug. He’d lost his shit when Rogue had almost smashed his Charmander one a few weeks back. I’d never seen him move so fast to catch something. I swear he’d take a bullet for one of them.
“Hung Likahorse,” the guy groaned.
“Take my fifteen incher, you dirty little stallion,” JJ growled and the sound of the guy coming made my nose wrinkle as I turned and grabbed some coffee from the kitchen. When I returned to the patio, he’d killed the call and had a frown forming on his brow.
“You alright, man?” I asked as I took the sun lounger beside him, figuring I’d drain a coffee then start on my laps in the pool.
“Yeah, I just…” His gaze moved to me and I saw darkness there. I wasn’t exactly surprised, we all had this aura about us since Chase. Like every smile was harder to summon and whenever there was a pause in conversation or we were left alone to our thoughts, they always turned to him. But something in JJ’s expression told me there was more going on than that.
“You can tell me anything, you know? I got you,” I said, not liking the idea that he was keeping something from me.
“It’s the escorting,” he said on a heavy breath. “I stopped doing it ages ago.”
“What?” I frowned in surprise. “But you rely on that money, why the hell would you stop?”
“I just don’t wanna do it anymore.” He placed his mug down and scraped a hand through hi
s hair. “It feels wrong.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked in confusion.
“I dunno, I just thought you’d be mad that I couldn’t make my cut and I didn’t want you to bail me out. I…worked for Jolene doing some fetish shit for a while.” His expression pinched in regret and my lips parted as I stared at him.
“JJ what the fuck?” I demanded, not because I gave a shit about Jolene, but because I wanted to know why he’d stooped that low instead of just talking to me.
“I’m sorry, I just thought if I could handle it myself then-”
“You don’t ever need to handle stuff alone.” I swung my legs over the side of the lounger and stared at him intently. “You know we’ve got your back – I mean I do.” I’d meant Chase and I hated that I’d meant Chase. The look in JJ’s eyes said he knew that too.
“Chase did help me out for a bit,” he admitted in a mutter.
I gaped at him for a moment, hurt cutting through my chest. “But you didn’t think you could tell me?”
“I didn’t wanna burden you,” he said but I didn’t buy it.
“It’s not just that,” I said. “I know it’s not. What aren’t you saying?” I pressed, trying to keep the bite from my tone because I knew JJ wouldn’t do anything intentionally to piss me off. That wasn’t his style. He was always looking out for everyone in our family. But I didn’t like that I’d been on the outside of this knowledge for so long. Chase had been gone for weeks and weeks now, so all this time JJ had just been struggling to get by right under my nose.
JJ swallowed hard. “Don’t get mad, alright?” he asked and I took a long sip of coffee before nodding. “Since Rogue’s been back you’ve been seriously on edge. I get that you wanna protect her, keep her in town, all that shit. But the way you’ve handled it…”
“Spit it out,” I pushed, sensing I really wasn’t gonna like what he was about to say.
Carnival Hill (The Harlequin Crew Book 3) Page 18