by A. E. Murphy
I close my hand over my mouth as the reality of the depth of this man’s depravity hits me hard. He doesn’t want me as his equal, he wants me as his captive forever. He doesn’t want me for my mind or my personality, he wants me in his bed, aroused and ready to help him sleep every night.
And to think I almost gave up my freedom willingly for him.
“I’ll be in the bridge…”
Before Captain fucking Calder finishes that sentence, I run like the hounds of hell are snapping at my heels, praying I don’t miss my window to escape. I leave everything behind, not that I have anything. It can all be a fucked-up reminder for him. I hope he mourns my parting forever. I hope it burns him so deep he can never love again.
But then I also don’t want that for him. I want him to find happiness in the madness that is his life.
So as Clunk loads me onto an old-looking Jet Ski and gives me a brief tutorial on how it works, I feel a weight lifted. Freedom is on the horizon and I’m heading straight for it. Yet the anchor of my heart remains behind, I can feel it weighing me down, heavy on my conscience as I consider what I’m giving up for this freedom. Or more aptly, whom.
“Thank you,” I say to him as he lowers the door that will ultimately lead to my escape.
“Be quick, they’ll hear it and see you. Once you get there, hide.”
“How will Niall know I’m there?”
He smiles weakly. “I called him for you. In return for calling off the feds and giving us a head start.”
He made a deal. Smart.
“He’s on his way already.”
“This is fucked up,” I murmur, pushing the Jet Ski into the water. “So, I park it and hide?”
“The moment this door closes, I’m turning the ship around. Well as soon as the anchor is raised.”
I look at the clear blue water that’s shimmering in the sunlight and wish my mind could be this clear.
“He won’t be able to come after you when he realises,” he finishes, waiting for me to climb on. “Go.”
“Will you do me one last thing?” I ask and he rolls his eyes. “Tell him I know that he’s been drugging me.”
“I was wondering when you’d figure that out.” He chuckles as though it’s hilarious. “It was just to help your seasickness and stop you from getting depressed. Could have been worse.”
I shake my head at him, wondering why I ever thought he’d understand what a violation that is. He’s the man who kidnapped me.
The Jet Ski roars to life with a twist of the key and I’m terrified. I still can’t swim so if I fall off this thing I’m fucked. I’m not even sure how to slow it down. I think this handle bit is the brake like on a bike but I guess only time will tell.
With a spray of water, I ride away from the ship, feeling my heart sink to the depths beneath it. Feeling my spirit rise as I recall all the things I left on land. On a different island but still…
I smile genuinely for the first time since being kidnapped and don’t stop until I near the beach. I hit the brake and aim for the sand but it stops so suddenly I tumble over the side and into the shallow water. Salty cold wets my clothes and gets in my mouth. I spit it out and power on, feeling the heat of the sun on the back of my arms.
The sun casts a burning orange glow as it starts to set but I don’t stop to watch.
I dig my feet into the sand and run, moving around people, hoping they don’t see me. My chest constricts and a thirst like no other takes over so I swipe somebody’s drink from outside of a tiki hut as I go. They don’t notice nor do I care. I’m thirsty. I gulp down the rum and Coke, accidentally swallowing an ice cube in my haste.
I don’t know where to go, I don’t know what to do.
I run and keep running until I reach the edge of the trees and stop to look around.
I wish I hadn’t because then I might not have seen him, I might have been able to lose him.
I don’t know how he followed me or how soon after I left he began to chase me, but seeing him crashing through a crowd of people on the beach, leaving his boat unmoored behind him, has me standing and gaping like an idiot. His feet kick up sand as he runs towards me and all I can do is watch, then, my panic subsides and I turn. Heading through the trees, along the path that leads to the same place where he fucked that woman behind that tiki hut yesterday.
I keep going until my lungs constrict with pain and my legs ache.
I keep going until my body feels heavy from exertion.
I’m limbless and there’s nowhere to hide.
Breaking through the trees, I dodge round a crowd of people, turning left, hoping I can loop back around without being seen.
I’m so tired.
“RAIN!” I hear him yell as I take refuge behind a large boulder, unable to run anymore. “Rain…”
He appears, skidding to a halt in the sand, shiny from perspiration, his chest heaving from the running but he’s doing better than me. His bare, tattooed chest reflects the orange sky making him look like he’s glowing, making his tattoos look darker and more lifelike.
I double over, gripping the rough surface of the dull, grey rock and try to calm my breathing. “Just let me go, Captain.”
Without words, he moves to me, presses me against the rock and rests his forehead against mine. “I know I should.”
“Then do it.”
“I can’t.” His eyes close, making him look pained, tortured. After all I wanted earlier, after all the pain I wanted him to feel, now that I’m faced with it I hate it. My eyes burn from it. My skin crawls with his ability to affect me knowing how wrong this is. “You’re the only thing in my life that has ever brought me true happiness.”
“We can’t go back.”
He kisses me, crushing his lips to mine desperately, so hard I taste blood. His fingers bite into my flesh as though trying to fuse us together, to bind us as one. When he pulls away he rests his hands either side of my head. “You’re the most stunningly beautiful woman I have ever laid my eyes or hands on.”
“Captain.”
“I meant what I said. I don’t talk about my feelings much, if at all, to anybody, but you… you make me different. You make me want to be different.”
I try to look away but he kisses me again, forcing me to shove him. “Stop.”
“Come back with me. Make the right choice.”
“I can’t be your prisoner anymore, Captain.”
Slowly and with purpose, he nods, then with speed, he bends, shoves his shoulder into my stomach and lifts me. I flop over his back, gasping as the wind is forced from my lungs.
“Captain,” I warn. “Put me down.”
Then, like the heavens and hell open all at once, I hear another voice. Sweet and deep, calm but dangerous.
“Yes, Captain, put her down.” And then the sound of the safety clicking off a gun.
I slide down the front of Captain’s body slowly. He doesn’t talk but his body is tight, so tight it could be marble.
“You called him,” Captain mutters to me quietly.
“Don’t fucking talk to her,” Niall barks but Captain doesn’t let me turn.
“I did,” I admit, swallowing the lump in my throat, keeping my eyes on his and my hands on his chest. “Let me go.”
His green eyes dim, the colour in them no longer vibrant and fiery. “He’s your choice?”
“I said don’t fucking talk to her.” Niall raises his gun. “Rain, come to me.”
“I love him,” I whisper and that fire in his eyes vanishes entirely.
He releases me immediately and lets his hands drop to his sides, he doesn’t look even remotely frightened by the gun.
I move to Niall, eager to lose myself in his scent and his warmth when out of nowhere four more men appear dressed in black. All with their guns raised.
One man in particular with a nasty scar around his throat, as though he’s had it slit and badly stitched together, steps forward. “Well, well, well, Captain Calder of the Sea Whore. I did wonder when
we’d meet again.”
Calder folds his arms and raises his chin, his eyes still on me as one of the men grab his hand, ready to cuff him but he spins and elbows the man straight in the nose.
I gasp as Niall drags me back and out of the fray, his gun still raised. His tanned hand grips the handle, firm and steady. I’d be trembling in his position. He doesn’t take his eyes off Captain as he battles another two men, getting in punches, kicks, breaking noses and possibly limbs. Sand flies in all directions, a cloud of greying gold.
“Please,” I beg but I don’t know what for. One of them Tasers him in the leg and then another and he finally drops, laughing as though it’s hilarious, as my nails dig into my palm. I watch them kick him repeatedly in the ribs, angry that he hurt them first and all I can think of his him.
Tears spring to my eyes and I beg Niall to make them stop.
He frowns at me and opens his mouth but it ends at last with more laughter, cursing and spitting from them. Captain really is a great fighter, if they didn’t have the guns or Tasers he might have even won.
Two men handcuff his hands behind his back and then his ankles, leaving him to spit up blood into the sand which he’s lying facedown on.
They were waiting for him. They knew he’d follow me and for a moment I wonder how they knew but then the sound of the ship’s horn has me tensing. They knew because of Clunk. Clunk sold him out because he knew he’d follow me too. I was played. We both were.
“Do you hear that, Captain?” The scarred man rips Captain’s head up off the sand. “That’s the sound of your crew abandoning you.”
Captain spits in his face making the scarred man release him and curse.
“My crew’s gotta do what’s best for them,” Captain replies and he’s lifted to his feet.
He looks at me and winks, then he looks at Niall. “Quite a problem for you though, mate.”
“Why’s that?” Niall asks bitterly. “We’ve won.”
“I’ll be tossed into a prison on the same island as you.” His face stretches with a smile, one I found so handsome until now. “It won’t be long until your girl is seeking me out to ride my cock again.” Niall becomes stony. “Likes it wild, this one. Watch her.”
Fuck him. I hate him.
“Shut the fuck up,” Niall barks and now his hand is definitely trembling. He’s going to accidentally put a bullet in his head and even though I despise Captain right now, the thought of him dying hurts somewhere deep inside of me.
I shake my head at Captain, losing any ounce of remorse I felt for his capture. “You’re disgusting.”
He grins, flashing his teeth at us both as he’s dragged away.
Niall tucks his gun away, pulls me into a hug and I accept his embrace, the way he smells of aftershave and lemons, the heat of his body through his shirt. All of my memories of my home comforts come flooding back and I grip him tighter with every passing second, keeping my eyes shut so I can’t see them taking Captain away. “I’m sorry it took so long. I am so sorry.”
“I just want to go home.”
“Come on,” Niall whispers. “It’s a bit of a journey but we’ll get you there.” Then he stops and kisses me, gently and sweetly, and tears slide down his cinnamon cheeks.
I wipe them away and hold him again. “I missed you.”
“It’s over. You won’t have to miss me again. I’ll look after you.”
“Thank you for not telling my mum.”
“You spoke to her?”
“He let me call her.” I look around the crowds of people for any sign of Calder but there is none.
“Do you have any water?” I ask, watching as they lead Captain away. The farther he gets the more anxious I feel. I try to push it away at the same time my arms ache to reach out and pull him back, despite everything.
We kiss again and for a brief flash I feel guilt creep in as I wonder if Captain fucking Calder can see me, but I brush it off. He took me from my life, he has no right to make me feel any kind of guilt for returning to it.
“Where are we going? How are we getting home?”
“You’ll see,” Niall replies and tucks me under his arm.
I look around, unsure on why there aren’t more people here. I guess I expected a cavalry of people, police officers, the FBI, the media. Instead the island is as it was, with people walking around minding their own business.
“Why didn’t you get me sooner?”
“International waters,” he replies sadly. “We aren’t even supposed to be here and we need to be quick, his men could come back for him. We’re outnumbered.”
I keep my head down and follow him to the same huts where Calder fucked that woman the day before. Nausea bubbles up, fired by an angry flame that burns through my body. Fuck him. Fuck the captain and everything he put me through.
“What’s going to happen to him? What is he being charged for?”
“Everything we can nail him with, murder, conspiracy to murder, kidnap, drug possession, weapons transportation. Most of which happened out of our area of jurisdiction but we have enough to put him away for a long time.”
He turns to me and cups my cheek with his soft fingers as the other grips my hip. “He can’t get you, not again, I won’t allow it.”
I wrap my arms around his neck and push my lips onto his. He tastes as I remembered and I lose myself in it, needing him close to give me the strength I require to move on from this. Strength he’ll provide me, understanding… perhaps not. He can never know about what happened on that ship and he will ask. Of course he’ll ask.
He’ll forever ask.
And I’ll forever suffer in silence.
LOOK OUT FOR PART 2 (FREEING CALDER)
To the wonderful Jami who I have dedicated this one to, thank you for everything you do for me. You take so much time out of each and every day to help me and so many other authors. It hasn’t gone unnoticed or unappreciated. You are a wonderful person and I’m honoured that you ever read my books, let alone everything else you do for me. Thank you.
Adriana Rizak-Healing, thank you for constantly demanding books from me and keeping me on my toes. I hope my books forever make you happy and if not, I still love you anyway.
Sam Heaney, you are so gorgeous and incredible. Thank you for everything.
Yasmin Alyssia, you consistently help me fine tune my books and save me so much time and worry. I appreciate you and I am so honoured that you choose to spend your time on my words.
To teachers everywhere, thank you for raising our kids so we can work. Seriously. Thank you. You aren’t paid or respected enough.
A. E. Murphy is the queen of sarcasm and satire, she likes long walks in the park, as much as ice cubes like to chill in a roasting oven.
She’s effortlessly independent and so good at adulting it’s unfair on the rest of the world. She only napped twice today and has only avoided the dishes for three days before making the child slaves do them this morning.
Winning!
Her favourite hobby is writing, her worst hobby is reading through that writing.
Also, she has two three cats that carry toys to the top of the stairs and drop them down so they can chase them. They do this repeatedly in the middle of the night.
Who cares if she has work the next morning?
Not the cats, that’s for sure.
And if it’s not the cats doing the waking, it’s the toddler crawling into bed with her and pulling individual hairs from her scalp with pudgy little fingers for comfort.
This is likely why she’s in a constant state of grump unless there’s chocolate and coffee.
P.S. Please leave feedback, if not on the book then on this ridiculous bio she wrote herself. It’s the least you can do seeing as she’ll forever talk in the third person now.
Alex loves her readers. Alex says thank you. Alex smiles.
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