The Way We Are

by Shandi Boyes

  Landon has barely pulled the dark gray car cover off his midnight blue pride and joy when a panicked voice seizes our attention.

  “Landon!” Justine screams again.

  Landon and I glance at each other briefly before we race out of the garage. With his legs double the length of mine, he reaches Justine before me. Ice scuttles through my veins when I spot the tears dribbling down her cheeks. She’s more upset now than she was when Maddox discovered her playing tonsil hockey with Brax in the hot tub. It's lucky Brax has a way with words, or he might have bid farewell to his two front teeth.

  “Savannah,” Justine murmurs through hiccups, answering Landon’s questioning gaze with fewer words than I would have liked. She points to the front of her house. “Axel.”

  I push off my feet like a rocket, outrunning Landon’s strides two to one. Justine only murmured two words, but they were enough to slam me with worry.

  Because the number of party attendees has shrunk in size dramatically the past hour, I reach the front entrance of the Walsh family estate in a record-breaking time. Anger roars through my body when I spot Savannah being dragged down the driveway by Axel. His clutch on her arm is so firm, tears are springing in her eyes.

  They nearly fall down her ashen face when I shout, “Let her go!”

  Fury lines Axel’s face when his head swings my way. “Walk away, Ryan, while you still have the chance,” he warns before continuing his caveman steps.

  “Not happening. The only person leaving is you.” My voice is enhanced by the fury lacing my veins, making it sound older than my years.

  When I close the distance between us, Savannah’s eyes meet mine, pinning my legs in place. Her look doesn’t slow my steps; it's the plea in her eyes. She doesn’t want my help. She wants me to walk away.

  What the fuck?

  “Savannah—”

  “It’s fine, Ryan. I’m fine. Axel is just a little upset,” she assures me, her words barely audible through the hammering of my heart in my ears.

  “I wonder why I’m upset!” Axel screams, yelling in Savannah’s face. “Did you kiss him like reported?! Did you let him put his lips on you?!” The anger on his face doubles when he spots the faint hickey on my neck. “Was that you?! Did you do that?!”

  “Reported?” Savannah asks, starting at the most vital portion of his sentence—the part that relays he has people watching her. “Are your uncles men still following me?” The annoyance in her voice picks up with every syllable she speaks.

  Axel’s throat works hard to swallow, but his mouth remains tight-lipped, forcing Savannah to snarl, “We spoke about this. Having his men shadow me was never part of our agreement! You promised it would stop.” She yanks her arm out of his grasp before folding both arms under her chest, amplifying the frantic thrust of her lungs. “I guess I shouldn’t be surprised at your inability to keep promises. Once a dog, always a dog.”

  Anger engulfs me when Axel retaliates to Savannah’s comment with violence instead of words. He backhands her so quickly, no one sees it coming, much less has the chance to stop it.

  Savannah is as shocked by his violence as me. While cradling her reddening cheek, she stares at him with wide eyes, stunned into silence.

  Fortunately, my reaction isn’t stalled by shock.

  Gripping Savannah’s wrist in one hand, I pull her to a safe distance while my other hand slams into Axel’s face. After glancing over my shoulder to ensure not a hair on Savannah’s head was ruffled from my abrupt jerk on her arm, I pole-drive into Axel with the same force I used on my dad weeks ago.

  Gravel kicks up in my face when we land on the driveway with a thud, but my resolve doesn’t weaken in the slightest. I repeatedly introduce my fists to Axel’s face, only stopping when an arm wraps around my waist to forcefully yank me back.

  “You taught him a lesson, now it’s time to step away.”

  “Let me go!” I demand, fighting to get out of Brax’s hold.

  My fury is so hot, it takes both Brax and Chris holding me back to keep me away from Axel, and even then, their struggle is immense. I want to beat him. I want to strangle him. I want to clutch his throat until the arrogance in his eyes disappears.

  Blood dribbles from Axel’s nose onto his white shirt when he stands from the ground. I’m smacked with a massive bout of adrenaline when I notice his legs are as wobbly as his angry snarl. He was as unprepared for my onslaught as I was for his slap to Savannah’s cheek; he had no chance of stopping it, or to even get a hit in.

  When Axel attempts to get up in Savannah’s face again, Landon steps between them. The fury in his slit gaze is as manic as mine. “Get the fuck out of here before I let Ryan finish what he started,” he warns, his words as violent as the blood thickening my veins.

  Axel must have a death wish. He ignores Landon’s warning by sidestepping him, his focus so devoted to Savannah, he has no clue he’s moments away from hitting the pavement for a second time this evening.

  “Is this what you want?” Axel asks, his eyes locked with Savannah over Landon’s shoulder since his large frame is stopping him getting any closer to her. “A guy who makes $5 an hour flipping patties at a local burger joint? You really think he can take care of you like I have?”

  When Savannah remains quiet, Axel roars, “I gave you everything you have! The dress you’re wearing, your fucking car. That was all me!” He bangs his fist on his chest like some sort of macho man. “If you think he can provide for you like I can, that acceptance letter from Cornell was fraudulent as you’re a bigger idiot than first perceived.”

  Although his nasty words steep me in anger, I suck in my first breath in nearly thirty seconds. I’m not gasping in air because he's showing Savannah his true colors; I’m grateful he has spun on his heels and is stalking back to his car.

  With his eyes locked on Savannah, he slams the door he was trying to force her into before heading for the driver’s seat. Seconds before he slips inside his expensive sports car, he warns, “This is one promise you can guarantee I will keep. If I drive out of here alone, I’m driving straight to him.”

  I’m riddled with confusion by his statement, but Savannah isn’t. The instant his threat left his mouth, her eyes snapped to mine. They hold the same appeal they held earlier today. The one where she silently begs for forgiveness.

  I shake my head, refusing to bow to her silent pledge for the second time today. He hit her. If he does it once, he will do it again and again. That isn’t a possibility; it is a fact.

  “Last chance, Savannah,” Axel warns, drawing Savannah’s focus back to him. “Leave with me, and we will pretend tonight never happened. Stay, and who knows what the outcome will be.” His says his last sentence like he's truly worried. He is a good actor, but not good enough to dampen my anger.

  It feels like the sun circles the planet a hundred times when Savannah gauges the authenticity of Axel’s pledge. She isn’t legitimately considering his threat, is she? He struck her in front of a dozen spectators, so who’s to know what he’ll do behind closed doors?

  Worried by the delay, Axel says, “It’s you and me, babe. Always has been. Always will be.”

  “You can’t trust him, Savannah,” I caution, mindful of the thousands of promises my dad has made my mom over the years. “You just said it yourself, ‘once a dog, always a dog.’”

  A stabbing pain inflicts my chest when Savannah’s moisture-filled eyes meet mine. “You don’t understand, Ryan. I need him.”

  “No you don’t! You don’t need anything from him,” I fire back, determined to show her I will give her the world if she would just give me the chance. “I can give you everything you need. You don’t need him.”

  Sensing the shift in my tone, Brax loosens his hold. He doesn’t fully let me go, but he gives me enough leeway to move a few inches closer to Savannah. Thank god, as I need her to see the honesty in my eyes.

  “You don’t need him. You’ll never need him.”

  Savannah peers at me like she wants
to believe what I am saying, but, unfortunately, her eyes reveal she doesn’t. They divulge the words her mouth will never be able to say: he can give me things you never will.

  Spotting the horrified expression crossing my face, Savannah whispers, “I’m sorry,” before pushing off her feet.

  “Savannah?” several people question in sync when they realize her uneasy steps are headed to Axel’s car.

  I want to convey my shock as well, but I’m too stunned by her decision to form words. Savannah’s father works tirelessly to ensure she has the world at her feet, so why would she stupidly believe she needs to supplement with money from a lesser man? It doesn’t make any sense. Nothing that has happened thus far tonight makes any sense.

  I snap out of my destructive thoughts when the sound of an engine firing to life roars through my ears. Smirking like the cat who swallowed the canary, Axel revs his engine, demanding Savannah quicken her pace without words.

  I fight against Brax’s hold like a madman when Savannah slips into the passenger seat of his convertible not even five seconds later. Although her eyes reveal her decision has been made, I’m not willing to give up without a fight. I let her go five years ago without a fight—I’m not making the same mistake twice.

  If she truly wants to be with Axel, tears wouldn’t be streaming down her cheeks, and her chin wouldn’t be tucked into her chest to stop me from seeing the pleading in her eyes. She doesn’t want to be with an abusive man. If she did, she wouldn’t have begged for me to run away with her when we were eleven.

  After reading a domestic violence pamphlet I had collected for my mom, she learned the statistics of domestic violence, so she did everything in her power to save me from following in my father’s footsteps. She even sold her beloved retro Barbie doll collection to fund our bus fare. That's not something a person would do if they wanted a violent relationship.

  Savannah doesn’t want to be with Axel any more than I want her life to replicate my mom’s. She’s just too scared to admit she deserves better.

  “Don’t leave with him!” I shout, projecting my voice in Savannah’s direction. “I can help you. You just need to let me.”

  I fight to be released from Brax’s grip, but he remains holding tightly, showcasing a side of himself I’ve never seen before. He’s always been the goofball, willing to do anything if it means a fun time type of guy. I’ve never seen him this serious before.

  “She’s made her decision, Ryan. You have to let her go,” Brax mutters in my ear, his voice as tormented as my fight.

  “No,” I disagree, continuing to struggle. “She doesn’t want him. She doesn’t love him.”

  My determination to follow Axel’s convertible backing out of the driveway like he’s outrunning a bullet is so strong, I drag Brax halfway down the gravel path, only stopping when my knees buckle beneath me and Axel’s taillights are nothing but a blur in the distance.

  19

  Ryan

  “Keys.”

  Not waiting for me to respond to his snarled demand, Brax plucks my keys out of my hand before heading for the driver’s side door of my truck.

  “I’m more than capable of driving. I haven’t touched a drop of alcohol all night.” My reply is full of torment, as dark and sludgy as my heart.

  “I know, me either,” Brax agrees, jerking his chin up. “But that’s all set to change.” He gestures his head to Chris, who produces an unopened bottled of scotch from under his shirt like he is Houdini performing a magic trick.

  “Damn, you went for the expensive one,” Brax surmises, overemphasizing his first word. “How much do you think a bottle like that would set us back?”

  Chris purses his lips before shrugging his shoulders. “Don’t figure it’ll be too much considering they leave them out in the open for anyone to take.”

  Air hisses between my teeth. “You couldn’t get into Justine’s panties, so you raided her parents’ liquor cabinet instead,” I grumble under my breath, my mood still hostile. “No wonder we never get invited to parties.”

  Brax bows a brow. “One, I was five seconds from getting in her panties before her brother ruined the fun. Two, this isn’t from her parents’ stash; this is from those college snobs who haven’t figured out a fifty-dollar bottle of scotch doesn’t taste any different than a regular bottle of scotch.” He curls his arm around my neck to clutch my throat in a death-hold. “And three, we get invited to plenty of parties; you’re the only killjoy who knocks back every invitation he gets.”

  He messes up my hair before rushing to my driver’s side door, stealing my chance to retaliate. Pretending his comment didn’t dent my ego more than it already is, I slide inside my truck. Since Brax and Chris enter from opposing sides, I end up squished between them—riding like the bitch I am.

  While Brax fires up my truck’s old engine, Chris cracks open the bottle of scotch he stole. Although I have no intentions of consuming stolen goods, the fury thickening my veins has me reaching for the bottle before Chris can even take a swig.

  Forty minutes have passed since Savannah left with Axel. Forty minutes of calling her cellphone nonstop; forty minutes waiting for her to reply to one of the dozen text messages I sent her, and forty minutes of wishing I had hit Axel hard enough the only vehicle he’d be traveling in is an ambulance.

  Forty minutes of silence added on to five years of hell has my mood circling a dark and extremely lonely pit.

  Ignoring the burn scorching my throat, I guzzle down the amber liquid, praying it will numb my emotions long enough I can work through the haze blurring my mind. I’m not only lost as to what happened tonight; I’m pissed off.

  Savannah is ignoring my calls. It isn’t just the fact she answered Justine’s calls within two rings backing up my assumptions; she returned Brax’s text in a decent timeframe as well. His text was nowhere near as polite as the many I sent, yet she replied to his message nearly instantaneously. How fucked is that? I defended her from a man who hit her, but answering my message isn’t high on her lists of priorities. That hurts—a lot.

  “Whoa, easy there, big guy. I want you to forget a little, not drink yourself into a coffin,” Brax says, snatching the bottle away from my mouth.

  He chugs down two large mouthfuls before handing the half empty bottle to Chris. I stop watching Chris swallow the burning liquid like it's water when Brax takes a right on Trent Avenue instead of our usual left.

  “Where are we going?” I know him well enough to know he hasn’t forgotten his way. Brax has lived in Ravenshoe as long as me—there's just one difference. I want to leave this town for dust; he’s happy to stay.

  Brax turns his chocolate brown eyes from the pitch-black night to me. “As far away from Coulton Road as possible.”

  I shoot him a suspicious glare, announcing my confusion.

  “If I were to drive you home, would you wait for us to leave before rushing to Savannah’s house? Or just dump us and run?”

  My lips move, preparing to answer Brax’s question, but Chris beats me to the task. “He would dump us and run.”

  I don’t deny their claims because lying has never been my forte. I have every intention of confronting Savannah, as meeting with her on her home turf may be the only way I can make her see sense. The Savannah I spent the past three weeks with was not the same Savannah who left in tears nearly an hour ago.

  I know people can have a hold on you—Savannah has had one on me for years—but that shouldn’t include people like Axel. He doesn’t deserve to be Savannah’s savior any more than she deserves a man like him.

  “He hit her. I can’t ignore that.” My voice embraces the anger heating my blood.

  “Yes, he slapped her,” Brax agrees, his voice a cross between frustrated and understanding. “But she still left with him, Ryan. No one forced her to walk to his car, slip inside, and leave with him. She did that of her own free will. She made her choice. Now, you need to respect it.”

  “She didn’t pick Axel over me,” I argue, pretendi
ng my stomach swirling isn’t disagreeing with me; it's merely contesting the copious amounts of scotch I guzzled.

  “She didn’t,” I repeat when neither Brax or Chris back up my claim, instead choosing to look at me with pity.

  That pisses me off more than their assumption Savannah chose Axel over me. Axel only has one thing going for him—money—but Savannah also has that in abundance, so that can’t be the reason she's with him.

  There's something more to this story than anyone knows, and I intend to find out what it is, no matter what the cost.

  20

  Ryan

  Two weeks of ignored calls and texts.

  Two weeks of pretending I don’t exist.

  And two weeks of watching her with him when she should be with me equals two weeks of festering anger.

  Two weeks of realizing money can buy love.

  And two weeks to understand no one is who they say they are.

  I thought Savannah could heal the fractures my parents’ volatile relationship caused to my heart, but all she did was break it further.

  No more. I am done.

  It’s time to let bygones be bygones.

  It’s time to forget my past and move on to my future.

  It’s time to give her up, once and for all.

  21

  Ryan

  “Ryan!”

  My trek across the dusty parking lot at the back of my school slows when the female voice shouts my name again.

  With my desire to leave before Savannah arrives for cheerleading practice greater than my wish to know who is shouting my name, I continue for my truck, ignoring it.

  It's been four weeks since Justine's eighteenth birthday party. For the first two weeks, I lived in denial, certain I knew the girl no one else saw. The last two weeks... let me just say, it hasn't been pretty.