Pretty Monsters

by Kimberly Carrillo

  Raven takes her hands from my hair and clings to my shoulders. We move against each other in a mindless drive to become one. Every time I bury myself in her heat, I feel her muscles squeeze my dick, but the pleasure isn't purely physical. Something inside of me cracks and knits back together. All the empty places inside me fill with warmth, with Raven.

  Wordless sounds slip past her lips as I rock her up and down my cock. Watching her unravel in my arms is a thing of beauty. My release barrels through me, and my knees go weak. Together we slip down to the bottom of the tub, boneless and unable to move. Tepid water beats down on us, running in rivulets down her face as she tries to blink water out of her eyes.

  Her breath hitches when she looks in my eyes. I lift a shaky hand to brush a sopping strand of hair from her eyes. "I–"

  I try to tell her what I feel, but the words won't come. How do you tell someone what they mean to you when all of the words are too generic?

  Raven brushes her lips across mine. "I know," she whispers.

  "You are everything to me," I try again. Maybe those aren't the words she wants to hear, but they are the only ones that come close to describing this feeling banging around in my chest.

  Her answering smile is serene and happy. Making her smile is the greatest achievement of my life, and something I'll never stop trying to cause.

  I shut the water off and grab a couple towels. Wrapping a towel around her I start to dry her off. "We should probably get out of here and let Ford clean off. We need to meet with everyone before I get distracted again."

  She looks down at the stained carpet, her smile falling. "So I'm back to being a distraction? I know I defied you earlier, but we're all safe. If I hadn't been there–"

  I put my finger to her lips. "Shh, I was an idiot before when I thought the only way to keep you safe was to stay away from you. You're right, the only way we get through this is together. I still want you to do as you're told. Most of the time at least, but it's not only about keeping you safe."

  She licks her lips. "Then why?"

  This time I'm the one that looks down. "Being touched is hard for me, unless I feel like I'm controlling it."

  "I understand. I want to give you what you need, and to be honest, I love it," she admits.

  We finally exit the bathroom, wrapped in thin scratchy towels. Ford rolls his eyes when he sees us. "Is there any hot water left?"

  I smirk at him. "A cold shower won't kill you."

  He grumbles something that sounds like, "You fucking suck," on his way to take a shower. Of course the water is probably warm again, but who knows how good the water heater is in a rent by the hour establishment.

  Raven and I wait for him to finish his much shorter shower, and grab Shane on our way over to Lucien and Ted's room. I'm surprised to see Amber nestled between Ted and Lucien. Not only because she doesn't seem like the type of girl to be shared, but also because she seemed to be thrown by the secrets Ted has revealed.

  Raven doesn't miss the proximity of her new friend to her brother. Her mouth falls open to form a cute "O" shape before she immediately catches herself and closes her mouth. "Hey, Amber," she squeaks, "I thought you were hanging out with Jen."

  "Uh, I came over here to talk to Ted," she stammers. Her face burns bright red, and she looks surreptitiously at Lucien.

  Unlike Amber, he doesn't try to hide his interest. I wonder if she's aware how extreme his interests are. If not, she's in for quite the surprise.

  Lucien slaps her ass. "Sweetheart, would you mind letting us talk? There's no need to scare you when you know Ted and I won't let anything happen to you."

  I raise my eyebrow at him, and he smirks. He likes to joke about me being kinky, at least I prefer to hook up with only one woman at a time. I mean, hooked up with. Past tense. Lucien is less discriminating with numbers of partners or gender, but whatever revs his engine.

  "Jen is in my room watching some reality show," Shane tells her.

  "Want to come with me, Raven?" she asks.

  Raven smiles, but shakes her head. "I better stay and help out. I prefer to have a hand in ensuring my own safety."

  "Probably less messed up than whatever you guys need to talk about," she says.

  "She's not wrong," Raven comments once Amber is out of the room.

  "Everything is fucked," Ted agrees.

  "Not everything," I mutter and pull Raven down on my lap in the rickety wooden chair that seems to come standard in shitty motels.

  "What kind of surveillance did you put in place at the gym?" I ask Shane.

  "There are motion sensors that send an alarm to Ford's and my phone, cameras that record to a cloud DVR as well as a physical hard drive that's in the office. There are also smart fire, smoke, and gas detectors. If we don't enter a code, the system sends a call for emergency services," he details.

  "What if the power gets disrupted?"

  "Then they all have backup batteries embedded and a signal gets sent from the power box. There's a sensor there too," he replies smugly.

  "We need to monitor the trackers and see if they come near the gym, and make sure to check the cameras in case they catch on to the trackers. Even still, I'm not sure it's a good idea to return there," Lucien thinks aloud.

  "What do we do in the meantime? Even staying in the cheapest motels we will quickly run out of money. Not to mention the fact that a group as large as ours will draw attention even staying at these kinds of motels," Ted adds.

  Ford groans and hits his head against the wall. "I've got football. I know in the grand scheme of things that isn't life and death, but I'll lose my scholarship and chance to transfer and play at a D1 school."

  Raven worries her lip, and I know she feels guilty for how knowing us has fucked up their lives. Lucien and I exchange a look. I hate when he's right, but I'm man enough to admit when I'm wrong.

  "We can't do this on our own," I admit.

  Lucien pops a brow and gives me his cocky asshole smirk. "I thought you didn't like my suggestion."

  "Would one of you mind filling us in on what you're talking about?" Shane asks.

  "You know my father is running for the governor's seat of Illinois, right?" Lucien starts. Shane, Ford, and Ted nod.

  "Good, then this will be easier to follow. The current governor is known as incorruptible, something pretty rare in Illinois politics. He started out as an assistant district attorney, where his first case was a felony murder case that had ties to my father. I don't know all the details because I was a toddler, but I've heard bits and pieces and looked it up online. From what I've been able to put together there was a witness who was in the wrong place at the wrong time, and they were taken out along with the target."

  No one speaks. Even I didn't know this story. I only knew that Governor Whitmore had a hard on to find evidence on Damien, but I never really questioned why.

  Lucien continues, "As usual, jurors were paid or threatened, and it ended in a hung jury. Evidence disappeared, making a retrial impossible. That put Damien on Whitmore's radar, and he's been working to bring him down ever since. As governor Whitmore pushed through legislation and created a special task force to fight organized crime. Damien hasn't been able to infiltrate the administration or find dirt on the governor. If he can't buy, scare, or threaten the governor then he'll try to get rid of him legally."

  "If he's as evil as you say, then why doesn't he just have him killed?" Ford asks.

  Lucien shrugs. "You've got me. I don't think the governor has anything on him, or he would have used it to bring him down. I do know his security team consists of men who were former special forces in the military. Perhaps we can give him something on Damien in exchange for his protection."

  "What do you have?" Ford asks. He looks at Raven before glaring at me in a silent warning not to suggest what he seems to know I'm going to.

  "My testimony," I say.

  29

  A New Plan

  Raven

  "What? No, no, absolutely not!" I sc
reech. My heart pounds painfully, and my chest tightens.

  Putting his hand on the side of my face, he stares deep into my eyes. I see resignation. "I'll do whatever I have to do to keep you safe."

  My eyes well with tears. "Not that. I'd rather run."

  "We'd never get to stop. You'd never have a normal life."

  Shaking my head vigorously, I clutch his free hand. "A normal life would be nothing without you in it. Please, please don't do this."

  "We're out of options. Besides, it's long past time when I answer for the things I've done."

  "What you were forced to do," I argue.

  "Either way, I'm not sure it matters. I've killed people, but you're right, I didn't exactly have the freedom to refuse. Maybe if I tell them how I ended up being an assassin, I'll get a deal. Let's not worry about that until we know how it's going to go down," he insists.

  "Come on, it's been a long day," Sin encourages me to stand. Pressing on my back, he urges me toward the door.

  Reaching around me, he grabs the knob, but halts to speak to Lucien. "Let me know if there's any move against the gym or close to our location."

  Lucien nods and casts me a guilty look. "Do you want me to start working the back channels to approach Whitmore?"

  Sin nods, and my heart falls to the floor. I can't stop the fear creeping in whispering my time with him is now limited to hours or if I'm lucky, days. No matter which way we turn there's a threat looming on the horizon to tear us apart.

  We pass Shane's room then stumble into ours, and I'm tearing at his clothes before he even kicks the door closed. Being with Sin has awoken a hunger inside of me I can't seem to quench.

  Fuck the rules, fuck obeying, fuck everything. I don't wait for him to give me an order or wait for him to act. We share the room, so any second Ford could come in and see everything, but I don't care. I'm desperate to feel him, to hold him, and burn this memory in my mind. If our time is limited, there's nowhere else I want to spend it than tangled in his arms.

  Tears stream down my face and my fingers shake as I make another attempt to pull off his shirt. He kisses me, and it's heartbreaking. It feels like a goodbye.

  "Please don't cry," he begs. "I'm here. We're both here. Be here with me right now."

  I jerk my head up and down, my breathing choppy, and my eyes sting with the effort not to cry. "I'm trying. I am, but I feel like there's a timer counting down over our heads. Is there no other option?"

  "If there was, I'd do it. I'd do anything to protect you."

  "I'm your weakness," I admit. "If it weren't for me, you could run and have a chance at a normal life. That's what I want you to do. Run, Sin, and don't look back."

  The muscle in his jaw pops as he grinds his teeth. "There's no life without you. It would just be a different kind of prison. I can live with this decision, and you have to let me. If I can't get a deal, I want you to walk away and never look back. You'll meet someone else, get married, have a family, and everything I am doing will have been worth it."

  I growl in frustration. "You stupid ass. That. Will. Never. Happen." I punctuate each word by drilling my finger into his rock hard chest. "I'm not going to move on. If you think I'm going to have some vanilla life after you fall on your sword, you don't know me at all."

  He puts his hands on my shoulders and pushes me back far enough that I'm no longer poking him in the chest. "Let me save you."

  "No," I tell him. Apparently, I'm really not good at following orders, but in my defense, this is fucking stupid.

  We are both digging into our positions. There's only one option here. With Sin and my brother determined to sacrifice themselves, or really just Sin, I'm going to have to work around them.

  He isn't going to give up his future to save mine. I'm not the damsel in some fairytale. I'm a warrior, and it's time he learn I can fight my own damn battles.

  Sleep doesn't come easily. Sin slides in next to me and holds me all night, but I can't get my mind to shut off. Once the sun starts to slip through the cheap floral curtain I give up fighting.

  Lucien and Ted call us over to their room. I don't want to think about what went on in here after Sin's comments about him liking to share. Only one bed is rumpled, and the entire room smells like sex and vanilla. It's a vomit-inducing combination, but not enough to turn me off of the donuts they went out and bought.

  "Anything?" Sin asks. My heart drops thinking his plans could move this quickly.

  Lucien shoves half a jelly filled donut into his mouth and shakes his head. "I reached out to an intermediary, but now I have to wait for him. I've got to be honest with you, I'm not sure I'm okay with this plan either. Never once have you had a choice in any of the shit you've done."

  Sin leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees while he sits on the end of the unused bed. "That's why it has to be me. At least I have a defense."

  "The only way to prove that is if I testify too. I go down either way. It should be me." Lucien looks at me, an apology clear on his face.

  Just what I need, another one of the people I care about trying to leave me for my own good. I'm pissed and ready to fight the world.

  "You both know how long trials take, right? What do I do in the meantime while you're both in prison awaiting trial? It's obvious neither of you think I can take care of myself, so who keeps me from being sold off to the highest bidder in this scenario?"

  Ford moves to my side and drops his arm around my shoulders. "She's right," he addresses Sin and my brother. "You know how this works. The two of you will go down for a bunch of murders, and somehow Damien will get away with everything. Men like him always do. Then he'll have Raven at his disposal without either of you stepping up to protect her."

  I elbow him in the side. "You're missing the point too. I don't need you all to protect me." He drops his arm and I gesture to everyone sitting in the room. Jen and Amber look like they're in shock. Shane is unusually quiet, and Jess is passed out.

  "Everyone in this room has had their life turned upside down to protect me. I don't want everyone giving up their lives for mine."

  It's my turn to sacrifice for them. Options race through my mind. Briefly, I entertain going back to my father, but I really don't want to be forced into a marriage. I'd go to the police myself, except, I don't have a shred of evidence. Running could be my only option, but where would I go?

  I could change my look. I'd have to if I decide to run, because Sin was right, I do stand out. My waist length hair and overly large blue eyes are a combination you don't see every day. Perhaps, if I dye my hair blonde and cut it I'd be just another California stereotype. Then I could work my way around waitressing. Whatever I decide to do, it'll need to be soon, before Sin and Lucien act on their dumbass plan to protect me.

  Ford steps up behind me and leans over to whisper in my ear. "Whatever you are thinking, stop it."

  "I don't know what you mean," I whisper back.

  "Bullshit. I know you aren't weak, and that you'll do anything to protect him, just as he is willing to do for you. If you run, I'll follow you," he warns.

  Teddy watches our interaction with a discerning gaze I hadn't picked up on before. I'm not surprised Sin and Lucien didn't pick up on his true nature before. He's obviously skilled at evasion.

  "Raven, can I speak to you for a minute?" he asks, rising from the bed.

  I nod, because while I don't fully trust him anymore, I'm compelled to hear him out.

  He moves to the door, and I follow him. Sin looks like he's going to try and stop me, but the glare I send him makes him pause.

  Teddy and I walk the short distance down the walkway, and I let us into my room.

  He leans against the dresser. "Lucien is going to have a hard time getting in touch with the governor, but not impossible. His best contact is someone that knows people, not anyone already in the inner circle of the task force. That will buy us time, but not a lot."

  My head bobs in agreement, although I don't actually know what he's suggest
ing.

  "I have contacts that work directly with the governor. My mother and I turned evidence against my father, or at least we were going to, but when he died—”

  “You mean when you killed him,” I interject.

  He shrugs. “They ruled it self-defense. Either way, they weren't necessary. We did help take down the few remaining members of his organization. It's part of the reason I am using a different last name. Anyway, I wanted to know what you would like to see happen before I tell anyone else."

  "I don't want them going to prison to protect me."

  He smiles like that's what he wanted to hear. "That's what I thought you'd say. Okay, here's what I'm thinking. It's similar to the plan Sin has, but instead of them turning themselves in, we give them something else."

  I flop down on the bed and groan. "Sure. Why didn't we think of that? I mean, obviously there's so much evidence on my piece of shit father that finding some to hand over should be simple. It isn't like he's a career criminal or anything."

  "At least you haven't lost your ability to be sarcastic," he chides. "Look, I know you're freaked out, but I do have a plan."

  I lean back onto my elbows, presenting a false front of confidence. "By all means, enlighten me." I'm aware of how bitchy I sound, but the fear has chipped away at any remaining sweetness they saw in me.

  "Lucien was already on to something at that club. I did some digging around on my own, reaching out to the few people my mother and I didn't turn over to the feds. I think Damien Blackthorne is the current Martin Gerrick. If we can prove it in such a way he can't get out of it, then we can bring down both the trafficking network and Damien Blackthorne. Sin is stubborn though, so we will need to work fast and make it fool proof."

  "Otherwise, Sin will just hand himself over," I finish for him.

  "What do you say?"

  I exhale. It's a shaky plan. The whole thing rests on whether or not we can find evidence where decades of investigators have never been able to. However, it does seem like the only viable option.