Calista shook her head. “No. Horrible was her being pregnant by the jerk, him telling her to get rid of it, and that she was just a stepping stone he used to climb a ladder he couldn’t even get a foothold on before.”
“Damn,” I hissed out. “I’m sorry I brought up that kind of hurt for her.”
Calista laughed, which was surprising. “Don’t be. She’s had almost a decade to get the fuck over it. Instead of learning a lesson and moving on, or getting therapy to help her deal, Sky became a shit person who won’t hesitate to trample all over and destroy other people’s relationships. On that note, don’t listen to the shit she says about Gabe and Kaylee.”
“I take it Kaylee is the makeup girl?” Cal nodded and I simply gave her a questioning look. When she wasn’t forthcoming with more I pressed. “Was she telling the truth though?”
Calista sighed. “I won’t lie. They’ve hooked up before, but they’ve never been together as a couple either.”
Well that sucked. I’d be on a tour with Gabe and one of his regular tour fuck buddies. “That’s good then,” I mumbled.
“What? Why?”
“Honestly?” I asked as we sat on a couch that was situated toward the back of the bus away from the rest of the band and the driver. Cal tipped her head up in answer, as if to say, ‘continue’. “I need distance from them before I become more attached to the whole family than I already am.”
“Girrll,” She drew out the word. “Being on tour probably wasn’t a good way to accomplish that goal. We’re all on top of one another in this life. We know who didn’t change their underwear, who slept with whom, and what everyone ate for breakfast.”
“Well, I kind of had limited options in the workforce for now,” I explained. “Besides, it won’t take long for this crush…” I trailed off, not believing I’d just admitted to having a crush on a man. Jesus, I was old enough to be someone’s mom. Hell, damn near old enough to be someone’s grandma at this point, and I had a silly crush. I damn near rolled my eyes at myself.
“Your crush?” She asked quietly.
I returned a sheepish smile in answer, rather than allowing the universe to hear my admission again. Instead, we were able to drop the somewhat depressing conversation in favor of getting settled into the bus and my new routine.
~*~
Over the next few weeks, I treated minor wounds among the crew, and continued on with Chevy’s physical therapy regimen. We actually had Cal and Roni join us for training since a lot of it involved yoga. Sometimes, we drew a crowd of watchful eyes as we worked out. Other days, more crew members joined in. While I occasionally saw Gabe peek in to watch, he never joined in. I didn’t think he had much time to breathe, let alone join us. Their band was busy with pre-concert interviews, sound checks, meetings, and fan events all day at some of the venues. I wasn’t sure where they found the energy reserves to actually go on and perform some days.
It helped me distance though. The few times we both had down-time moments, I made sure not to stick around areas where he might find me easily. I’d been hiding out all day in the dark shadows of the mezzanine, watching the stage being put together and collecting my thoughts. I even heard Gabe ask the crew if any of them had seen me or knew where I was. Guilt flickered inside me, that he’d gotten me this job and I was actively hiding out from him. Just as I nearly gave in to that guilt, and swallowed the horrible feeling about what might happen if I gave in and then had to watch him with someone else, a familiar voice spoke from the shadows behind me.
“Why are you avoiding him? Did my dad do something to make you angry?”
I turned to watch Chevy move closer. My eyes stayed trained on his until he took the seat beside me. While we had enough dim light to see one another well enough, we were still shrouded in shadows. “He hasn’t done anything,” I admitted.
“Then why?”
“Chevy, it’s complicated,” I whispered.
“Nah. I don’t believe that,” he argued.
I rolled my eyes at the boy. “You’re all of 18-years-old, what do you know?”
He laughed. “I know my parents were my age when they both played a part in fucking up all three of our lives,” he huffed.
“Your parents lives, and yours, seem to have fared rather well.”
“Sure, almost 20 years later you can say that. You didn’t see my mom have her heart broken repeatedly. You weren’t there for all the whispered – and not so quiet – rumors and taunts about how she was a high class whore simply because she was unlucky in love and apparently extremely fertile.” He mentioned the last with a horrified shiver for effect.
“I’m sorry you kids and Kendra ever had to go through that, but I bet your mom wouldn’t change a thing because it would mean not having her babies.”
Chevy grinned at me. “That’s exactly what she always told us when we’d be fighting mad on her behalf.”
“See, things work out like they’re supposed to sometimes, even if it doesn’t seem like it in the moment. I bet you wouldn’t give up your siblings for anything either.”
“Well, that really depends on the day and the sibling, to be honest,” he joked. Then he put on his serious face and looked me in the eye. “But sometimes, you have to make it work. It wasn’t always easy with Josh and my mom. They split up once, when she refused to marry him, ‘just because she was pregnant’,” he told me while using air quotes for the reason to marry.
“They worked it out,” I reminded Chevy.
“Yeah, they did. That’s what I’m telling you. You can’t keep ignoring him and hiding. I think you like my dad and I know he enjoys your company. Why not see what comes of it?” He asked.
I pointed a finger down to the stage where sound check had just ended and Kaylee had made her way to Gabe on stage. We watched as she drew her nails down the front of his t-shirt-clad chest and said something to him that we obviously couldn’t hear.
Chevy sighed. “He’s been turning down her advances all tour.”
I shrugged my shoulders. “How awkward do you think it would be for me, knowing his ex-girlfriend, fuck buddy, or whatever she was, is always watching and waiting for an opportunity to pounce? Maybe she’d be plotting every time I turned my back long enough?” Before he could answer I continued on. “How do you think she’d feel if I got together with your dad and she had to witness our relationship front and center?”
“My dad said they were never an item.” Which meant Chevy had noticed Kaylee and Gabe interact enough that they’d had a conversation about it.
“That might be true, but I’ve seen what your dad hasn’t paid attention then. Watch,” I told him as I pointed again, drawing Chevy’s attention to them. “She’s heartbroken every time he rejects her.”
“So, you’re saying he can’t move on from someone he doesn’t have feelings for?”
“No. I’m saying that it would be messy, even if unintentionally on his part. Besides, I’m here to work, not to flirt or play dating games.”
Chevy laughed. “You’re probably the only one then. Most of the crew thinks of groupies as a perk of the work.” He then pointed to the right side of the lower rows of seats where Wen greeted Cal with a passionate kiss. “I’m pretty sure it’s part of the deal for everyone at this point.”
“This is really the life you want?” I asked him, trying to guide the subject into a different direction.
Instead of answering my question, Chevy asked one of his own. “Have you even watched a single concert yet since we headed out?”
I shook my head. Even though I’d had every intention of doing so in the beginning, it was something I couldn’t bring myself to see. I knew that I’d fall just a bit harder for Gabe, seeing him in his true element. I’d also been sparing myself from the sight of all the women who would throw themselves at him in a moment’s notice. “I stay backstage to do the job I was hired for. I’ve heard everyone though,” I admitted.
“No, you haven’t. You’re coming with me tonight. No exceptions.
If someone gets hurt, they’ll know where to find us.”
“Fine,” I reluctantly agreed. “But you need to find me some hearing protection first.”
“Not a problem,” he told me while grinning from ear to ear. “You’ll see why I want to do this.” His face grew somber for a moment. “I’ll be fine with smaller venues, closer to home, if I need to for Opal.”
That was sweet. He’d give up being a true touring musician for his girl. That was something I knew stemmed from what his father had gone through, and what he’s said he would have given in order to have been a part of Chevy and Kendra’s life back then. I wondered if he wasn’t hanging on to Opal more because of his parents’ story than their own, but it wasn’t my place to question him about his true feelings.
“How are the two of you doing?”
“I’m here still because she needed space. Opal doesn’t think I should stay with her since her legs don’t work.” Chevy turned shimmery eyes to my own. “I don’t know how to be without her. I don’t care if she’s in a wheelchair, Mel. I swear, I don’t. I love her.”
“I know you do, honey. You just have to keep showing her that. She’ll come around.” I hoped so anyway. Chevy was a wonderful boy who had more great qualities than most men I had ever known. I gave his mom full credit for raising him right. He thought his parents’ mistakes screwed up all of their lives, when really, they created the perfect storm to give Chevy much needed lessons in life.
“Her injuries aren’t easy to come to terms with,” I reminded him. “Give her time. And remember this too, she got to watch you come back to yourself. You can walk, run, swim, and she’s probably saddled with a little envy as a result.”
“Shit,” he hissed. “I never thought about that. Her mom told me to stay away for awhile. She said seeing me wasn’t good for Opal’s recovery. You think that’s why?”
“Maybe,” I told him honestly. “You did the right thing by giving her time. Be patient for a bit and then go back and fight for the both of you.”
Chevy made a humming sound before he stood. It was only then that I returned my focus to the stage to find Gabe gone and Kaylee glancing longingly into the seats where Wen and Cal had been making out moments ago. I wondered, briefly, if that was something she had done with Gabe before, or if she was just daydreaming about making it happen. I couldn’t blame her one bit. Having been able to get to know the man pretty well, not just the rock star persona, I knew he’d be worth it. Hell, I’d suffered through my own fantasies about him for months.
“Come on,” Chevy called out to me, jolting me from where my mind had wandered. “You need to go get ready for tonight.”
I glanced down at myself. My jeans were faded, worn, and well-loved. My Vans were comfy on my feet and my t-shirt was a band tee that Cal had given me. It fit tight across my breasts and a bit loser down to my hips. “What’s wrong with this?” I asked as I stood.
“Nothing, if you’re part of the stage crew, and a dude,” he teased. I smacked him playfully on the shoulder. “You should glam up for tonight and get the full concert experience. I’ll be your own very platonic date, even though I plan on looking sexy as fuck. Don’t get any ideas. Ford would legit kick my ass if you fell for me and not him,” he joked.
“Heaven forbid that I fall for the wrong brother,” I joked back.
“Mel?”
“Yeah?” I answered with my own questioning tone.
“If I haven’t said it before, I want you to know, I appreciate you. Not just as my nurse either. You’re family now.”
“Chevy,” I gasped.
“Nope, don’t bother denying it. Our whole family thinks of you that way – no matter whether you and my dad pull your heads out of your own asses or not. I care what happens to you and don’t ever want to lose you. Promise, no matter what, you’ll always be around?”
“I don’t know if I can promise that,” I admitted.
“We’re not like your family,” he told me and I knew my story had gotten around to more than just Alex and Gabe.
“I appreciate that, Chevy. I care about you too,” I told him. It was as much as I was able to give in the moment and he realized that.
“All right, see you in an hour?” He asked. The moment I nodded, he took off. My heart thumped heavily in my chest as our entire conversation settled in. Chevy had not only given me his okay to date his father, he was pushing for it. I wondered what he would have to say if he knew I suspected his mom and dad still had a thing going? Hell, it was most likely just my own insecurities rearing their ugly heads. I knew that, somewhere deep down. Still, given my history with my husband and sister carrying on behind my back for years, it tended to taint all other potential relationships from the start. I was always waiting for the other shoe to drop or looking into the dark spaces for hard truths. That’s why I had empathy for Kaylee and why I worried about Kendra.
~*~
My first side-stage concert experience was a wholly different vibe from simply being on the road, in the background, with the bands who were on tour. I’d somehow separated them in my mind from the rock stars they were to the people I knew. My realization that they were one and the same came shortly after chevy picked me up from the tour bus for our concert date.
“You’re too much,” I told him as he bowed before me.
“I like to think that I’m just enough.”
I rolled my eyes at him. Spending time with Chevy both made me feel younger again – on the inside – and wistful for my lost youth. I hated having regrets about my life, but I did. What would I have experienced, gone through, and who would I have turned out to be if I’d just let my ex go off to New York without me like my mom begged me to do all those years ago? I might have had the chance to live young and frivolously, rather than jumping straight from my youth into being bogged down by adult responsibilities, and a husband who lost interest while I was working to make our lives better.
“Get out of your head,” Chevy demanded as we made our way through the back door of the venue. “Shall we hit up craft services first? I hear they put on quite a spread today for some big wig’s ego boost or something.” My stomach grumbled as the smell wafted our way, making Chevy laugh. “I’ll take that as a yes.”
We turned into the room just as two men were coming out. “She’s becoming a problem,” Gabe was saying.
“Not anymore. She told me she was leaving after this show,” the man I recognized as Deacon, returned. “I’m having someone new flown out to meet the tour at the next venue. Everly is looking for a man so we don’t have to worry about this shit again. Preferably a gay man, since we have Sky and Macy on board too.”
“I haven’t been with her in over a year,” Gabe explained before he glanced over and noticed me and Chevy standing there. His son did not look at all happy with Gabe in that moment. I wanted to laugh, because I knew he’d think that the conversation wouldn’t sit well with me, but it was quite the opposite. I’d seen Gabe be gracious and respectful to Kaylee – who I assumed they were speaking about – but there was only so much a person could take of saying ‘no’ before it became tedious and harassing.
“Hey,” Gabe called out before turning back to Deacon quickly. “Catch ya later about this, all right?” Deacon nodded, a ridiculous smirk on his face as he did. I wondered if he was calculating the risk of me becoming his next problem. The man sauntered away before I could hazard a guess though. “What are you two up to?”
“I’m taking Mel on a concert experience date,” Chevy informed him.
“You’re what now?” Gabe snapped out, causing me to flinch back and his son to grin ear to ear.
“Chill,” Chevy commanded his dad. “It’s totally platonic. Ford called dibs on her, and I respect that.” I rolled my eyes and laughed again as we moved further inside the room so that we weren’t blocking the entrance.
“Fucking Ford,” Gabe hummed before turning to me. “You look amazing,” he complimented, which caused heat to rise to my cheeks.
&nb
sp; “Thanks, so do you,” I returned, only to see Gabe’s own grin broaden to match his son’s. He wasn’t made up for the stage yet. Gabe was just his usual, relaxed self, in jeans, tennis shoes, and a t-shirt from a band I’d never even heard of. Honestly, he was dressed a lot like I had been earlier. Suddenly, I was thanking Chevy for insisting that I get glammed up.
“What do y’all have planned tonight?”
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” Chevy cracked.
“I haven’t seen a show yet, so Chevy said I needed to get the full side-stage concert experience tonight.”
“You haven’t seen a single show?” Gabe asked, clearly stunned by that. I shook my head in answer. “Why not?”
“I’ve been working.” The explanation rolled off my tongue the way rote responses usually do, causing Gabe to frown at me.
“There couldn’t have been an emergency every single night for four weeks, Mel.” The infuriating man let out an exasperated huff, letting me know that he felt the same about me. “You’re not on the clock 24-hours a day, seven days a week.” I didn’t respond to that because I had no clue what to say.
“Gabe, you’re needed in your dressing room. They have a wardrobe change for tonight.” Everly called out before speaking into a headset she had on.
“I have to go, but we’re going to remedy your work-life balance after tonight.” He patted Chevy on the shoulder. “Good call,” he told his son before rushing off to handle his business.
Chevy beamed at me as we got our food plated. “He’ll make sure you get out and do things now.” His smug face told me that had been his goal in dressing me up and making this night happen anyway. I couldn’t really complain, because he’d only been looking out for me.
“While I appreciate your meddling on my behalf, I wish you’d stop. Your father has enough to worry about, without adding me to the list.”
“Sounds to me like he has it handled though.”
No response to Chevy was necessary. Instead, we worked on putting away some food. The spread covered a wide array of selections from light finger goods to fish and chips or steak, potatoes, and vegetarian options. I had a sampling of several of the finger foods rather than giving into a heavy meal that would bloat me. I’d worn the one going-out outfit I’d bothered to pack. Black leather pants, that made my ass look phenomenal, a cropped, shimmering red top that cupped my boobs, enhancing my cleavage and clasped behind my neck. My hair was swept up off of my neck while auburn curled tendrils slipped free of the hold of the clip that I used to pull it back. My makeup was on point as well, with heavily coal-lined lids, lush mascara, and lips that matched the ruby red of my top. I’d probably fit in better with an older, 80s rockers crowd of groupies, but whatever. I thought I looked great.
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