Best Shot (Madison Howlers Book 2)

by Camellia Tate

  That made Blake smile. He remembered Ashley knowing nothing about hockey when she’d started dating Connor. She’d learned, and so had Evie. In fact, Blake was pretty sure Evie now taught the newer girlfriends about hockey if they didn’t know the rules. He also knew that Evie did talk a lot. It surprised Blake to learn that that had been a reason for Nilssy to question whether they were well matched.

  It did, however, remind Blake how easily he got along with Doe. She was everything he had assumed he’d want in a soulmate. “So what... changed? Would you say something changed ?” Maybe it wasn’t the right word, Blake wasn’t sure.

  Nilssy unfastened the chin strap of his helmet, seeming to use the movement to give himself a moment to think. Blake didn’t mind waiting. He knew this wasn’t the kind of conversation Nilssy had expected to have when he’d stopped Blake for a chat.

  “We sort of… grew into each other, I guess,” he answered. “I stopped being so overwhelmed by her constant conversation. When I actually managed to get a word in edgeways, it turned out Evie quite liked listening to what I had to say.” He smiled. It was a bright, cheerful expression quite at odds with how serious Nilssy usually looked on the ice.

  “Even then, I wasn’t sure ,” Nilssy admitted. “That came a lot later. After we’d had our first real fight.”

  Not having had a fight with a girlfriend - not one that hadn’t ended in a break up at least - Blake didn’t know how that worked. Even just hearing Nilssy say how it had taken a while, how he hadn’t known until later? It made Blake wonder. Yeah, he did get on with Thea, but as Connor had pointed out, it wasn’t as if Thea was Blake’s soulmate.

  Doe, on the other hand, might be. Maybe Blake just hadn’t given her enough of a chance. “What happened? That made you sure.” Nilssy had said a fight. Blake still didn’t know how that connected.

  “I thought there was a good chance, but I hadn’t quite worked up the nerve to ask Evie what her soulmark said.” Nilssy looked a little shame-faced at that. He wasn’t used to admitting not having the courage to do something. “I think she was in the same position. It made us both edgy. We ended up having this blazing row over -” Nilssy paused, then shrugged. “I don’t remember. Something insignificant.”

  Blake genuinely struggled to imagine having a fight with Doe, she was so nice. Before he could spend too long on that thought, Nilssy had carried on. “Anyway, we calmed down, and we talked things over. After one conversation, we carried on like the fight hadn’t even happened, still crazy about each other.” Nilssy’s smile returned if anything even wider than before. “ That’s when I knew.”

  It made Blake smile, especially seeing how Nilssy’s face lit up. It reminded him of how Connor looked when he talked about Ashley. Like she was the best thing to ever happen to him. Blake liked Doe, but he struggled to imagine ever looking like that when he talked about her. The thought ached low in his stomach, as if he was being unfair to Doe.

  Blake kind of wished he could think like that about Doe. It wasn’t that he thought they needed a fight to get there, but... “How long did it take you? Before you were sure?” Blake asked.

  “Months,” Nilssy answered. “You know what it’s like, being in the press every now and then. I was careful about my soulmark.” Blake nodded. Almost everyone on the team was careful. It was why Connor’s soulmark being splashed across the papers had been such an uncomfortable shock for the team. He was lucky something good had come of it.

  Nilssy shrugged. “I think me being so careful made Evie reluctant, too. We’d been dating for four months, and we’d known each other for longer.”

  Blake nodded at that. He had known Doe for about the same length of time, but they’d definitely been taking things slowly. It made Blake wonder if maybe he just needed to give it more time, more effort. Yeah, he did get on with Thea, but as Connor had said, Thea wasn’t Blake’s soulmate. And maybe neither was Doe, but Blake owed to them both to figure that out, to give it a chance.

  “That helps a lot, thanks, Nilssy,” Blake said giving his Captain a smile. “I’m sorry for being distracted during training. I promise it won’t happen again.”

  Nilssy’s expression returned to the more serious one Blake recognized. “I trust that it won’t,” he said. “Don’t beat yourself up. It happens to all of us at one point or another.” He gave Blake a playful glance. “It happens to James about once a week.” They both knew that wasn’t true . James might have a new girl every week, but Blake wasn’t sure he’d ever seen one have an impact on James’ training.

  “I’m glad I could help,” Nilssy added. “It’s not official yet, but I think this’ll be my last season in the NHL. I want to leave all of you in the best position that I can.”

  Now that really wasn’t something Blake had expected. His eyes widened. “What?!” He half-shouted, making the Coach glance their way from the stands. Blake lowered his voice. Coach would probably know already, Blake couldn’t imagine being the first person Nilssy told. “But why ?” Nilssy was older than most of them but he definitely could still play.

  “Do the others know?” Obviously, Blake wouldn’t say, but losing Nilssy as their Captain would suck. Nilssy had been Blake’s Captain since day one. It was so hard to imagine having someone else lead the team.

  “Some of them,” Nilssy answered Blake’s last question first, perhaps because it was the simpler of the two. “Hayden does, and James and Angie. I’ll probably tell Connor this week.” Those were more or less the old guard, the guys who’d been around as long as Blake, or longer. It made sense for Nilssy to tell the newer recruits later.

  He gave a small sigh. “I love hockey, but I don’t want to get injured out. I want to stop on a high.” His gaze seemed to go distant, almost dreamy. “Evie and I are talking about kids. I want to be fit enough to play with them.”

  It wasn’t something Blake had thought about. He also hadn’t thought about kids . Nilssy was older, so it made sense that he would think of it. Blake got not wanting to get injured, to be forced to stop playing. Even though it all made sense, Blake would still be sad to see Nilssy leave.

  “It’s going to suck not to have you on ice with us,” Blake said truthfully. “But if that’s what you want, then I’ll be happy for you,” he promised, giving Nilssy a wide smile. “You’ve been a great Captain, but you’ll also be a great dad.” Of that Blake had no doubt at all.

  Nilssy beamed. That alone would have convinced Blake he was making the right decision for himself. “It’ll suck not to be on the ice,” he agreed, giving Blake’s shoulder a squeeze as he started to move off the rink. “But you won’t get rid of me completely. I’ll be coming to games to make sure you don’t all forget everything I taught you.”

  Blake followed Nilssy, both of them standing to put guards over their skates. “I hope you work the soulmate thing out, Ashbury,” he said. “Evie and I have had our difficulties, but apart from hockey, nothing’s been more worth it.”

  “Yeah, me too,” Blake nodded. He really did hope he worked this out. The conversation made him wonder if maybe he needed to try more, try harder with Doe. At the same time, Blake wasn’t sure it was fair , not if he wasn’t sure. He didn’t want to be that guy who strung her along for nothing.

  Blake had a lot to think about. Talking to Nilssy had given him a different point of view to consider. Blake just wished someone would tell him what the right choice was. Instead, he’d just have to figure it out himself.

  Once Blake had gotten over the surprise of learning that Nilssy was retiring, his thoughts were free to return to his dating issues. What Nilssy had said about giving it time played on Blake’s mind. Doe was everything that Blake would’ve listed as wanting in a soulmate. She was sweet and caring, she could be funny once you got her to open up. Blake genuinely enjoyed spending time with Doe.

  And she might have been his soulmate.

  Despite it all, Blake still couldn’t get Thea out of his head.

  The way he made her laugh, the way she made him
laugh. Blake wanted to learn more about Thea, he wanted to listen to her talk. He enjoyed seeing how competitive she got, how she bit her lower lip when she thought. She wasn’t what Blake had imagined would be compatible with him. That just made it feel more... right.

  He was torn, not wanting to hurt Doe but also not wanting to be unfair . If she was his soulmate, then Blake owed it to her for them to find out. He just didn’t know how to do that. Or how to stop thinking about Thea, about how nice her lips had felt against his and how much Blake wished he could kiss her again.

  Despite the turmoil inside his head, Blake had done as he’d promised Nilssy and not let it affect his game. Focusing on hockey was something Blake knew how to do. It helped a bit. Not fully, though. When after practice the next day Connor asked if Blake was up for dinner with him and Ashley, he eagerly took the offer up.

  “Thanks for inviting me,” he said when he and Connor got to his. Ashley gave Blake a wide smile in response.

  “It’s cool. Connor’s been catching me up on your relationship drama. I’m not sure I trust his retelling,” Ashley told him with a grin, before accepting a ‘hello’ kiss from Connor. It made Blake look away. They seemed so solid as a couple. Here he was, not even able to figure out what to do about his dating life.

  Connor smiled, clearly enjoying Ashley’s teasing. “I’ve brought him so he can tell you all about it himself, stop complaining,” he chirped back, giving Ashley a nudge in the ribs before he wrapped his arm casually around her waist for a moment.

  Waving at the kitchen table, Connor encouraged Ashley and Blake to sit down. “Go on, Blake,” he urged. “You did say you wanted her advice more than you wanted mine.” Connor clearly didn’t object to that. It was one of the reasons he and Blake were such good friends.

  It did also mean that Blake had to tell Ashley what had been happening.

  Telling Connor had felt easier, probably because Blake had known that like himself, Connor would be at least somewhat confused about the situation. Ashley, on the other hand, was someone who always had a plan. Blake supposed he was a little worried that whatever her solution would be, he wouldn’t like it.

  “So obviously you know I’m dating Doe,” he started because Ashley did know that. “And, um, I guess she might be my soulmate?” Except even to Blake that didn’t sound very convinced. “And I like Thea, but as Connor pointed out, she’s not my soulmate so it’s not like... I can’t just ask her out instead, not when I’ve been dating her best friend.”

  Blake felt quite... stuck . He wanted there to be an easy solution. Connor was right - Thea wasn’t Blake’s soulmate, so was there even a chance she’d want to go out with him? Not to mention that it would hurt Doe. That was the last thing that Blake wanted.

  What he hadn’t expected was the speed with which Ashley turned her head to look at Connor. “You said what ?” she asked accusingly. Blake didn’t really get it at first. It was only when Connor’s eyes widened that Blake remembered what Ashley thought of soulmarks. Unlike most people, she wore her mark openly, refused to believe that it decided who she should be with.

  It figured that Ashley wouldn’t be very impressed by the suggestion that non-soulmate relationships didn’t matter.

  “I didn’t mean that !” Connor responded. He sounded genuinely shocked. Blake was sure that was what he remembered Connor saying. Still wide-eyed, Connor looked between the two of them, clearly not sure which he should be addressing.

  It was probably good that Connor hadn’t put any food on yet.

  “I said -” Connor started, and then frowned, probably trying to recall exactly what he had said. “I said you were screwed, I remember that,” Connor admitted. “I didn’t mean you shouldn’t ask Thea out. Doe will probably be upset if you do because Thea’s her best friend, and that does suck.” He gave Blake an apologetic look. It was hardly Connor’s fault that Thea was Doe’s best friend. “I thought Doe might be more understanding if you could say it was because Thea might be your soulmate.”

  Connor’s gaze moved to Ashley and he added, “You know, because most people care about that. Even if they shouldn’t care as much as they do.”

  “Oh,” Blake said with a frown. He could’ve sworn that Connor had said that since Thea wasn’t his soulmate she didn’t matter. Blake recognized how he could’ve misunderstood. Soulmates weren’t a thing he ever thought of as being for him. He knew all the expectations people had about soulmates. It was easy to see how he might have assumed what Connor had meant.

  “I think I misunderstood,” he said apologetically. Blake hardly wanted to get Connor in trouble with Ashley. “But I guess, it’s kind of true? If Thea was my soulmate, or even if we had a chance of being soulmates, things would be... easier.” But as it was, Doe was Blake’s maybe-soulmate and...

  “Do you think Doe’s your soulmate?” Ashley asked drawing Blake’s attention to her.

  It felt weird to say ‘yes’, not because there wasn’t a chance that Doe might be but because it meant openly discussing his soulmark. That wasn’t something Blake had ever done. Ever since he’d been a kid he’d been taught to hide it, that his soulmark was something that could be used against him.

  Ashley seemed to sense Blake’s hesitation and gave a small wave with her hand. “Alright, so let's assume she might be. Do you want Doe to be your soulmate?” That caught Blake by surprise. He hadn’t thought of soulmates as being something you could choose .

  There was a silence for a moment as Blake thought over his answer. Thoughts circled round and round, first remembering what Nilssy had said about giving it time, then moving to Thea and how much Blake wished he could be taking her on dates, rather than Doe.

  He hadn’t got anywhere. He was quite glad when Connor took a seat at the table. “Doe’s an unusual name, but I doubt she’s the only one in the world,” Connor pointed out. “Maybe your Doe lives in Peru, or somewhere, and you’re never going to meet her. Lots of people don’t.”

  Connor shrugged. “If that’s the case, and you like Thea, then the only thing holding you back is that it’s awkward to date Doe’s best friend.” He reached across the table, giving Blake’s arm a friendly punch. “You’ve never let being awkward stop you before ,” he chirped.

  That distracted Blake enough to forget to mock Connor for thinking that Doe’s actual name was ‘Doe’. Sure, he too had thought that until she had laughed at him about it. That just went to show that Blake could mock Connor about it. Instead, he raised his hand to flip Connor off.

  He had a point, though. Ashley seemed to think so, too. She gave a hum that drew Blake’s attention to her. “Awkwardness and Thea saying yes,” she pointed out. “I don’t mean to be the dick who points this out, but does Thea like you back the way you like her?” It was a fair question. Blake wondered if he should just say he didn’t know. But this was Connor who was Blake’s best friend and Ashley who Blake was pretty sure was Connor’s best friend.

  “She kissed me. When we were skiing. It was... not an accident, but... We hadn’t planned it or anything. I don’t want to hurt Doe,” Blake sighed. It felt good to be able to tell someone. It wasn’t like him and Thea had talked about it. He opted not to mention how he also almost kissed her again after she’d cut her finger.

  “What?” Connor asked, loudly enough to make Ashley jump. “You didn’t tell me that!” He looked genuinely a little offended. The expression was gone almost as soon as Blake noticed it. Another reason Blake liked Connor was that he was very good at getting over things.

  He turned slightly, giving Blake as thoughtful a look as Connor ever did. “You didn’t sound like you wanted Doe to be your soulmate,” he said. “And honestly… that probably means you aren’t hers. If you were, you wouldn’t have these feelings for Thea.”

  “Yeah,” Ashley nodded. “But also... it doesn’t matter. You don’t have to do whatever your soulmark says.” Blake gave her a dubious look at that. It was easy for Ashley to say when her soulmark read ‘Connor’ and she was in love with
someone called ‘Connor’. It seemed like she could read Blake’s mind, though. “I’m not with Connor because our soulmarks match. I’ve met other Connors, I’ve even met other Connors who have my name on them.”

  That was definitely different from Blake. He had only ever met the one Dorothy and it was Doe. Connor was right, though, that it didn’t have to mean that they were soulmates. Blake liked to think that fate wouldn’t be so cruel as to match him with someone when he preferred someone else.

  “And if Thea doesn’t want to date me?” Blake asked, sounding a bit pathetic even to himself.

  “Then she doesn’t want to date you,” Ashley shrugged.

  Connor nodded but did also give Blake a softer bop on the arm, which was clearly intended to be consoling. “You’ll live,” he promised. “If she doesn’t want to date you, it’ll suck. It’ll probably still be better than dating someone you don’t really think you want to be with.”

  Blake watched as Connor glanced at Ashley. He remembered how miserable Connor had been when they’d briefly broken up. Judging by Connor’s face, he remembered it too.

  “If you and Thea like each other, you’ll find a way to make it work,” Connor promised. “That’s more important than whether she might be your soulmate.”

  The smile that Ashley gave Connor at that made Blake look away. It was so warm and such an in a relationship kind of a smile. Sometimes Blake did wonder if the connection Ashley and Connor had was a soulmate one. He also knew that Ashley would argue it wasn’t. Not just a soulmate connection at least.

  “You’re right,” Blake decided. “I think if Doe was my soulmate, I would... It’d be different.” Blake had seen how much Connor had missed Ashley when they’d broken up. He honestly just couldn’t imagine missing Doe like that. But Blake wanted to . He wanted to be with someone he did miss like that.