Best Shot (Madison Howlers Book 2)

by Camellia Tate

  “I...” Blake started and then paused, before shaking his head. “I know I haven’t been a very good person to date, that I’ve been distracted,” he admitted. That didn’t help . “But I just... Thea, I like spending time with you. I like spending time with Doe, too, but it’s not the same.” None of this was what Thea had come here to hear. It just fuelled her anger. Blake didn’t stop there.

  “Doe’s great, she is , I know that. That’s why I need to break up with her. She deserves someone who’ll treat her better, someone who will only have eyes for her. I don’t think that person’s me, Thea,” Blake said and then gave her a look. “My eyes are on someone else and I can’t help it.”

  “Have you tried ?” Thea snapped. She knew as soon as she said it that it wasn’t fair. Blake being so… reasonable made Thea feel so much worse. A tiny part of her mind wondered if he was right. She shouted it down. He couldn’t be right. That kind of ‘I can’t help it’ intensity was only supposed to happen with your soulmate - and Thea most certainly wasn’t that.

  She took a step closer, closing the distance between them to shove her finger in Blake’s face. At least a head shorter than he was, she hardly felt intimidating, but her anger spurred her on. “Can you even tell me one thing about what makes Doe so great?” she demanded.

  Before Thea could even blink, Blake’s hand was wrapped around her wrist. It was firm, yet somehow also gentle. “Yeah,” Blake nodded but didn’t let go. “She’s got really fucking great taste in friends.” Before Thea had a chance to say anything at all, Blake’s mouth was against hers, his body like fire pressing into hers.

  Thea pulled back with a jolt. Her free hand slapped across Blake’s cheek, so hard it hurt . She rocked back on her heels, cradling her tingling hand against her chest.

  “What the fuck , Blake?” she shouted. “Have you even been listening to me? I’m telling you, this can’t happen!” Rage boiled up inside her. Thea could still feel the imprint of Blake’s lips against hers, the solid wall of his chest as he’d pulled her to him.

  The whole situation was spiraling out of Thea’s control. She hated it. She wanted to just run away, forget any of this had ever happened. Of course, she couldn’t.

  “Fuck, I’m sorry,” Blake said stepping back just as fast. She could see the red mark forming against his cheek. Blake looked genuinely petrified at having made Thea slap him. “I wasn’t thinking. That was not okay for me to do. Shit. I’m sorry, Thea. Yeah, yeah, I have been listening.” Except if he had been, he wouldn’t have kissed her , would he?

  Thea watched at Blake bit his lower lip, tongue running over it in a way that made her look away. She could taste Blake’s kiss on her lips and that wasn’t helping the situation at all. “I get that you don’t want this, I’m sorry for pushing it,” Blake told her. She could hear the guilt in his tone. “But you can’t make me not break up with Doe.”

  It tightened the knot in Thea's stomach. He was right, she couldn't make him. If she didn't, it would be all her fault. She would have come over here for nothing, and she'd be breaking Doe's heart into the bargain. Thea sniffed hard, feeling tears gathering in the corners of her eyes. This was all so fucked up .

  She couldn't let Blake see her cry. She didn't dare. He'd be so nice about it. Thea could just imagine how he'd put his arms around her, let her sob against his broad chest. Thea wasn't allowed that. She wasn't even allowed to want that.

  "Doe doesn't just have great taste in friends," she said, past the lump in her throat. "She's kind and loyal. She'll surprise you if you give her enough time." Doe would never have let herself get into this situation. "She's much more like you than I am," Thea argued. "You'd clearly be a better match."

  Blake sighed in response, shaking his head. Thea so desperately wanted him to not agree. Blake was smart, he’d know how true Thea’s words were. “Doe is kind and she is loyal,” Blake agreed. “She’s funny when she wants to be, clever in so many ways. Doe is great , Thea, I know that,” he said.

  “I just don’t think more time will make it right .” Blake sounded so defeated as he said it. That made Thea wonder if he’d already thought about it. But no! She couldn’t let him give up so easily. Not when Doe was his soulmate . Probably. Definitely a lot more than Thea was his soulmate.

  Thea wanted to shake him, but she kept her distance. She wasn't going to risk getting closer, no matter how good Blake's mouth had felt opening against hers. "You're wrong ," she insisted. "You have to try ." Doe would be devastated if Blake dumped her now. Thea wouldn't even be able to comfort her, not when she'd know it was her fault.

  Blake pursed his lips. Thea knew him well enough to know it was his stubborn look. The knot of nerves in her stomach turned to panic . She simply couldn't allow this to happen. There had to be something she could do.

  "I can't make you change your mind, but you should," she argued. " Nothing is going to happen between us anyway, and Doe can make you happy!"

  “Why are you so insistent on this?” Blake asked. “I get that you don’t want us to go out and that’s your choice. But Doe and I aren’t going to work out. I won’t be able to make her happy, not the way she deserves me to. I wish I could, Thea, I do, but it’s not right .” He sounded so sure. Thea couldn’t let that be the case. She had to explain, had to tell Blake how he was right for Doe, how he just had to try harder.

  “Of course you will!” God, when she'd left the house, Thea hadn't pictured having to convince Blake he could make someone happy. It ached inside Thea. She so wished she could throw herself at Blake, let him make her happy. She wouldn't do it, not when it would make Doe miserable.

  Thea turned, pacing around Blake's cozy-yet-spacious living room. "You and Doe will be great together," she insisted. "You're so good at talking to people, but you're not just polite, you're funny too, the same way Doe can be funny. Look at where you live! You've both got that knack of making somewhere into a home." It hurt, thinking of the home Blake and Doe might build together. "You need someone sweet to come home to after games. Someone who won't make everything into a competition."

  She could tell by Blake's expression that she wasn't convincing him. It made Thea feel almost desperate. "You just can't break up with her. It'll make you both unhappy!"

  “But will it ?” Blake asked, his eyes wide. “I don’t think I make Doe happy now . We have fun when we see each other, yeah. It’s a few dates here and there and... I haven’t seen her in days and yet I miss you rather than her.” There was a frustrated sigh in Blake’s tone. He brought a hand up to run his fingers through his hair. “Listen, Thea, I get what you’re trying to do, but I just... I’ve thought about this, I don’t think Doe and I are meant to be.”

  All of Thea’s feelings seemed to rise up inside her like a tide. Blake was wrong . He and Doe were meant to be. That was exactly why Thea couldn’t give in to her own feelings - or let Blake give in to his.

  “ We’re the ones who aren’t meant to be, Blake,” Thea shouted, vision going hazy as her eyes filled with tears. “That’s what I’m trying to tell you! You’re Doe’s soulmate , so it doesn’t matter how I feel!”

  It took Thea a moment to register what she’d said. It was only when Blake’s eyes widened that she recognized it. She’d said soulmate. Suddenly, Thea felt physically sick. That hadn’t been her secret to tell.

  “Shit. I -” But what could she say? That she’d made it up? There was no way Blake would believe that.

  Thea could hardly bear to even look at him. She didn’t want to watch as Blake reassessed his future with Doe. He knew now, that was all that mattered.

  “I’m sorry.” Thea almost couldn’t control the tears. She hated feeling so weak . Her emotions were going haywire. Guilt piled on top of more guilt. Not only was she a bad friend for developing a crush on her best friend's soulmate, now she'd even robbed Doe of getting to tell Blake what her soulmark said. It should have been a significant, intimate moment between the two of them, not something Thea blurted out in the heat of an argum
ent.

  “Please, don't tell Doe,” she begged. “She'd want to tell you herself, and I -” Thea felt her spirit crumple. She couldn't lie to Doe forever. How could Thea even call herself Doe's best friend, after what she'd done?

  She simply couldn't take it anymore. "I have to go.” She ignored the way Blake reached out like he wanted to stop her. She needed to be anywhere else. She needed to be by herself, where she could cry and deal with the overwhelming feelings that threatened to drag her down into some dark underworld.

  Turning on her heel, Thea fled Blake's house. If he tried to follow, she didn't look back.

  Chapter Ten

  Growing up, Blake’s parents had always told him to never show his soulmark to anyone. In the Ashbury family, marriages were never about soulmarks. You married to keep the money close. You never, ever risked someone claiming to be your soulmate just because they were after your money. It had taken a long time before Blake had realized that not everyone thought that way.

  The belief that he should always protect and hide his soulmark wasn’t one Blake had ever gotten rid of. Even the thoughts about how someone might claim to be his soulmate just because they wanted something from him had taken a long while to overcome. Blake had never thought about what would actually happen if he did meet his soulmate.

  After Thea had left, her words rang in Blake’s ears.

  You’re Doe’s soulmate .

  Blake had wondered if maybe Doe was. When she’d told him that her full name was ‘Dorothy’, Blake couldn’t help but wonder. Despite that, he had decided that she couldn’t be. If Doe had been his soulmate, Blake wouldn’t have developed feelings for Thea.

  In the whole of that time, Blake hadn’t really stopped to think what Doe’s soulmark might read. The conversation about soulmarks wasn’t one that Blake had ever had with anyone. No one but his parents knew what Blake’s soulmark read. It was more than that.

  For generations, the Ashburys had been almost too careful when it came to soulmarks. Blake remembered his grandfather proclaiming that soulmarks were the worst thing ever to happen to business. Or perhaps business was the worst thing to happen to soulmarks.

  Marrying well was so much more important. Or at least it had been. Blake liked to think that times had changed. He certainly had no plans to marry anyone for money. That didn’t change a centuries-long family tradition.

  Soulmarks relied on your first name. The Ashburys had come up with a genius way to sidestep that - you just didn’t go by your first name.

  That was how Blake knew that he wasn’t Doe’s soulmate.

  Yes, her name was on his skin.

  But his was not on hers.

  “Hey, Remy, you’ve got a second?” Blake asked once the locker room had cleared out after the game that evening. They had lost, so no one was in a very good mood. The locker room had been quiet as everyone changed. Most of the guys had already headed home to lick their wounds.

  It wasn’t a bad loss. The team had still played well, but all losses felt bad no matter what. Blake had to admit that his heart wasn’t fully in it, not with his thoughts spinning around in his head so fast.

  After Blake had realized that he definitely wasn’t Doe’s soulmate, he had remembered that there was someone else who might be. There wasn’t any definite reason why Remy would be the Blake inscribed somewhere on Doe’s skin but... Blake kind of hoped he was . Yes, at least partially because it’d make him feel less guilty , but mostly... Blake just wanted Doe to be happy.

  He’d thought back on all the times he’d seen Doe and Remy talk. They seemed to get on, in a way that Blake felt he should have noticed before but never had. Sure, maybe he was just imagining it, but... what if he wasn’t? What if Remy and Doe had a connection that Blake had been standing in the middle of? His thoughts returned to Thea again. Except Thea had been clear that she didn’t want to date Blake.

  That was no excuse to continue to string Doe along.

  When Remy turned around, he gave Blake a surprised look, then nodded in confirmation. There were still a couple of other guys in the locker room. Blake would rather have this conversation more privately.

  “Grab a quick dinner with me?” Blake asked.

  If anything, Remy looked more surprised at that. It wasn’t exactly usual for teammates to get dinner together after a loss. He seemed to consider for a minute, then shrugged. “Sure, I don’t have anything else I need to do.”

  They got ready in silence. It wasn’t until they’d reached the privacy of Blake’s car that Remy pressed him for more details. “Is something up, Ashy? I wasn’t going to say anything, but it didn’t feel like you were giving it your all today.”

  That was... fair. Maybe a bit harsh but fair. Blake didn’t think Remy was trying to accuse him of anything. “I guess I have been a bit distracted.” He nodded because it was true. “It’s kind of what I was hoping to talk to you about.” Pulling out of the parking lot, Blake glanced at Remy. To his credit, Remy waited patiently for Blake to elaborate.

  It struck him how much it was something Doe did, too. Remy was such a genuine person, calm and patient. It made Blake feel like he could open up to Remy.

  “I’ve been thinking a lot about Doe. Well, Doe and me. I... You’re pretty friendly with Doe, aren’t you?”

  As much as he could be sure of anything with his eyes on the road ahead of him, Blake felt certain that Remy blushed . It wasn’t a look Blake had ever seen Remy sport before.

  “Yes,” Remy answered, bringing a hand up to scratch at his stubble. “We spent a lot of time together at Christmas. I know she was there with you but -” Remy gave a slight shrug. “With neither of us much wanting to ski, we got talking,” he explained.

  There was a smile playing around Remy’s lips. “She’s easy to chat with. She seems to ask just the right number of questions, and actually listen to the answers.”

  “She is,” Blake agreed easily. Doe was very easy to chat with. She always showed genuine interest and caring. There was nothing wrong with Doe, Blake knew that. She just wasn’t right for him . Maybe she was right for Remy. Blake couldn't just tell him that Doe's soulmark read ‘Blake’.

  After a moment in silence during which Blake took another left turn towards the steakhouse, he spoke again. “I really like Doe, but I don't think I like her the way I should when dating someone,” Blake said. He turned to look at Remy as he stopped at a red light. “But I think you might.”

  There was a tense silence. Then Remy gave a startlingly deep chuckle. Something in his face seemed to ease, something that Blake hadn’t even noticed was strained until it wasn’t anymore. “I’ve been feeling a little bit guilty about it for days now,” Remy admitted.

  “Nothing has happened,” Remy hastened to add. “I wouldn’t go behind a teammate’s back like that. And I’m sure Doe wouldn’t, either.”

  That made Blake’s stomach flip unpleasantly. Not because he minded that Remy liked Doe, but because he couldn’t say he’d been as good of a person. He had kissed Thea, more than once at this point. It was hard not to feel guilty about that. Not that he shouldn’t feel guilty about that.

  “I’m kind of glad to hear you say that,” Blake said. “The bit about liking her, not the bit about... I’m not bringing this up because I thought there’s something going on behind my back,” he promised. He understood why Remy might’ve worried about it. Especially as a new addition to the team. Blake was glad to hear that Remy and Doe might have an actual interest in each other.

  He took another turn, before carrying on, “I’m seeing her tomorrow and... I think she’ll say ‘yes’ if you ask her out after that.”

  Remy’s smile was brief but blinding. There was no way Blake could have missed that. It made him feel a little better, not about kissing Thea, but that he wouldn’t be making Doe unhappy by telling her he wasn’t as interested as he should be.

  “I hope she will,” Remy said. “We haven’t - Well, I suppose we’ve been quite careful not to step over any boundaries.
I don’t know if she likes me as more than a friend.” He gave Blake a fleeting shame-faced glance. “You’re right, though. I do like her that way. I hope that isn’t why you’ve been having trouble…”

  “It’s not,” Blake assured almost straight away. He couldn’t let Remy think this in any way was his fault. “I... Doe really is very lovely but I’ve been... I guess I kind of wish Thea had asked me out instead of Doe.” It wasn’t an admission Blake had expected himself to make. It was certainly true .

  He gripped the wheel a little harder, not glancing at Remy. Blake felt too guilty about the truth of his words. He worried Remy would judge him. Rightfully, but it still wasn’t something Blake wanted to see. “She told me that I should keep dating Doe, that she’s not interested in dating me,” Blake said. “But that doesn’t seem very fair on Doe.” Especially not when the more Blake spoke to Remy the more he was convinced that Remy was Doe’s soulmate.

  Remy was quiet for so long that Blake worried he was judging him. He couldn’t quite steel himself to look. When Remy finally did make a noise, it was a hum. “That does seem… odd,” he said. “I agree, it wouldn’t be fair to Doe at all.”

  After another pause, Remy turned his head, as if studying Blake’s expression. “The two of you got on well even the first time I saw you,” he pointed out. “Do you think Thea just feels guilty? That that’s why she’s pushing you to stay with Doe? If you don’t, she might feel it will be her fault .”

  Blake had thought about that. Kind of, at least. He knew he couldn’t make Thea want to date him. He still thought she had feelings for him. The kiss they had shared at the ski resort had definitely been something . He could hardly tell that to Remy. It had been hard enough to admit to Ashley and Connor.

  “Yes, I think that’s definitely part of it,” Blake agreed. “I think she just wants Doe to be happy. I guess being broken up with is never great .” Which, admittedly, was at least partially why Blake had wanted to speak with Remy. He hoped that Remy and Doe might be a soulmatch. It’d ease his own guilt. That wasn’t a great reason, Blake knew that. If Doe was less sad because of it, well, that was a good thing, right?