Craving Redemption: Forbidden Series #4

by Lorraine, Tracy

  “What the hell are you doing?” he barks when I go to pull my dress up my legs.

  “Getting dressed?” It’s not meant to come out as a question, but my voice rises when I get a look at his hard expression.

  “I don’t fucking think so. Get the bottle and get over here.” I look between him and where I’ve got my dress halfway up as I try to decide what to do. Go home alone or get a little more of what he’s got to offer? I’m not sure there’s really anything to consider.

  Dropping the fabric, I step out, grab the bottle and the glasses from the side as requested, and make my way back to the bed.

  “Good girl.”

  “I’m not a fucking girl.”

  “Oh, sweetheart. I’m well aware.”

  I’m lifted and positioned across his waist, his now fully hard cock teasingly lining up with my pussy. Taking the glasses from my hand, he holds them out so I can fill them up.

  * * *

  Cracking my eyes open, I try to remember where I am. When the weight of an arm resting over my waist takes my attention, things start falling into place.

  The suit with the intense steel eyes.

  My thighs clench as I remember all the things that happened in this room last night. Without even moving, I can tell that my insides are tender after weeks of neglect.

  Managing to slide to the edge of the bed, I blink a couple of times at the bright light of the alarm clock. Five am. Fuck.

  Gently lifting his arm, I slip out of bed, praying that he won’t wake up. The last thing I need is the awkward morning after the night before. It’s best I just get the hell out of here.

  I rush to pull my dress on before swiping my bag and shoes from the floor and tiptoeing from his bedroom. His door squeaks a little as I pull it open, but when I look back, he’s still out like a light. I desperately want to stand for a minute or two and appreciate the beauty of the sleeping man before me, but my fear of him waking up is enough to have me running.

  In no time, I’m sliding the key into the lock of my own front door. My brain is still sleep and sex fogged, and the last thing I’m expecting is to find Joe racing towards the door looking panicked as I step inside.

  “Jesus, Erica,” he says, pulling me into his body.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “You disappeared. I had no idea where you were, and you weren’t answering your phone.” His concern isn’t something I’m used to, and I’m not sure how I feel about it.

  “Sorry, I guess I’m just used to living alone and not answering to anyone.”

  He pulls back, his brows pinched together. “You don’t have to answer to me. I just wanted to know you were safe. But now I know you are, I’m expecting to hear all the details. Please tell me you’ve been with the man with the waistcoat.” His hand slips into mine and pulls me towards the kitchen. Depositing me on a stool, he turns and kickstarts the coffee machine. I desperately want to fall face-first into my bed and get some more sleep, but coffee is a strong second.

  “Yeah, I left with him.”

  “And?” Joe turns and pins with hard a stare.

  “And it was a great night.”

  “Do you want to tell your face?”

  “I’m serious, it was a great night. He was…full on.” Joe’s eyes light up and his eyebrows wiggle.

  “Keep going.”

  “He was just…I don’t know. Intense.”

  “Intense is good. Memorable.”

  “Yeah, I guess.”

  Silence descends around us. Joe brings over two mugs and pours some milk into mine. He waits for me to take a sip before asking his next question. “You didn’t want to leave him, did you?” My eyes fly to his, and I try to figure out how to best answer, but it seems I don’t need to. “Oh my god. You like him.”

  “I’ve not had enough sleep for this,” I moan.

  “Are you going to see him again?”

  “I doubt it. I just left him asleep in his bed. I don’t even know his name.”

  “Fuck, that’s hot. I need to find me one of those. It’s been way too long.”

  “You didn’t get lucky last night?”

  “Nah, the best I got was a hand job while listening to our new neighbours going at it like fucking animals.”

  “TMI, Joe. TMI.” He chuckles, leaning back against the counter.

  “Just be glad you weren’t here. You’d have been begging for it.”

  “Been there, done that, got the t-shirt.” I run my eyes up and down his body, trying to look disgusted, but he just laughs at me.

  “Shut the fuck up, you loved it.”

  I shrug, because there’s no point denying it. The few times we’ve fooled around have been pretty great, especially for a guy who thinks he’ll end up spending his life with a man. Who am I to argue? We were both single, and an orgasm is an orgasm at the end of the day.

  “I’m going back to bed,” I say, tipping away the dregs of my coffee and placing my mug in the sink.

  “Right behind you, sweets.”

  I turn left into my room while Joe goes right. Shutting the door behind me, I lean back on it and a smile twitches at my lips. It’s been quite a long time since someone stayed up worrying about me. It might make me feel a little weird, but at the same time it’s nice knowing that someone cares enough.

  Stripping out of my dress once again, I stand in front of the mirror in my en suite and assess the damage. It looks like a bird’s nesting in my hair, my face is covered in smeared black make up, and my lips are swollen from the suit’s kiss. Fuck only knows how Joe could take looking at me seriously. I look like a hot mess, but memories of how I ended up this way has desire tugging at my lower stomach. Did I do the right thing, leaving like that?

  That single thought haunts me as I wash his scent from my body and lie in bed, waiting for sleep to claim me. I fear that the answer might be that it wasn’t.

  Chapter Four

  Before I know it, the weekend’s over and I’m making my way down the street toward the tube station for my morning commute to work.

  I’ve worked the same job since I dropped out of university when I was twenty. I never intended to stay, but I soon found myself at home in the small, family-run building company, and the time never really came that I wanted something else.

  Lauren, the boss’ daughter and our in-house accountant, soon became one of my best friends, and I loved spending my days sitting beside her as we worked. The younger guys on the firm were pretty awesome too, especially the one I now live with.

  The fact that I still have the job is nothing short of a miracle after the monumental fuck-up I made. Everyone can tell me that it wasn’t my fault, that I was manipulated, but that doesn’t help me see it any better. As far as I’m concerned, I allowed it to happen. I allowed the boss, my best friend’s dad, to manipulate his way into my bed and blackmail me into keeping his dirty, money laundering secrets. The way I see it, I’m just as guilty as he was. I may not have had a hand in any of the dodgy deals going on, but I sure helped keep his tracks hidden, and at the first threat to my job and my home I opened my legs for him almost willingly.

  My cheeks heat as I remember those few months of my life. I’m pretty sure I’ll forever be ashamed of myself, but I was at my wits’ end, up to my eyeballs in debt thanks to my ex, and I needed help. I just didn’t expect it to come with so many strings and so much betrayal.

  “Morning,” I sing, walking into the office, dropping my bag on my desk and heading straight for the coffee machine and kettle. I’m used to being the first in, but since the boss’ heart attack and death a few weeks ago, his stepson and the rightful boss of this place returned and kicked everything into touch.

  “Good weekend?” Ben asks, leaning his hip against the doorframe, watching me make both of us our first caffeine hit of the day.

  “Yeah, not bad.”

  “The rings around your eyes tell a different story, E.”

  “How about yours? Things still good with Lauren?” I wave him off, no
t wanting to talk about what—or who—has kept my sleep at bay the last few nights. His whole face lights up at the mere mention of her name, and my stomach clenches. How hard is it to find someone who’ll look like that when they hear my name?

  “She’s good. We spent the weekend redecorating Mum’s bedroom so we could move into it.”

  Ben and Lauren have one hell of a story attached to their relationship, but after being apart for six years, they eventually managed to stop arguing for long enough to figure their shit out and embark on their second chance. I’m happy for them…as well as jealous as fuck.

  “I can’t believe your mum moved out just like that.”

  “You and me both. But hey, we’ve got the whole house to ourselves now.” He winks at me, his eyes darkening, probably with some filthy memory I don’t need the details of.

  “I know I’ve said it before but I’m so glad you two sorted your shit out.”

  “Me too. Now it’s your turn to find yourself a decent bloke.”

  “Ha, no. I don’t think I’m destined for that.”

  “You never know. The man of your dreams might just walk through that door at any moment.”

  We both turn to look at the entrance to the office as the door opens right on cue. Unfortunately for me, it’s just Lauren who walks in.

  “Everything okay?” she asks when she realises we’re both staring right at her.

  I hate that I can see disappointment in her eyes every time she looks at me now. She says she understands everything that happened with her dad, and that she doesn’t blame me for any of it, but it still hurts. I’ll do anything to get our friendship back where it was.

  “Just talking about Erica having a man.”

  “Erica’s got a man?” Lauren asks, rushing over to get the gossip.

  “Erica is standing right here. And no, I don’t have a man nor do I need one. I’ve got Joe to babysit, that’s enough for me right now.”

  “Babysit?” booms through the office, seconds before he also appears. “Since when did I need babysitting?”

  “You’ve no idea,” Lauren mutters, and the two of us laugh, both knowing what it’s like to live with him.

  “Did Erica tell you about the hot man she spent Saturday night with?”

  “No, she was actually saying exactly the opposite.”

  “Just because I don’t have a man doesn’t mean I don’t make use of one.”

  “Christ. I don’t need to hear this on a Monday morning,” Ben moans, grabbing his now full mug and walking away. “Feel free to do some work when you’ve all finished gossiping.”

  “Sure thing, boss,” Lauren says with a laugh, saluting him, but he’s already rounded the corner into his office. “So…” Her eyes turn back to me. “Tell me all about this man.”

  “Nothing to tell. Met him at The Avenue, he took me home, we fucked all night, I left.”

  “Wow, how romantic.”

  “Who said anything about romance?” She shrugs and I use her moment of silence to run to the safety of my desk. That doesn’t mean I don’t hear Joe filling her in with all the details of my conquest.

  Shaking my head at the two of them, I turn my computer on and get ready to start a new week.

  We’ve got a long few days ahead of us as we continue to fight to keep the business from going under after all of Lauren’s dad’s questionable investments and embezzlements, but it’s also our last week in this building. This has been the home of Johnson & Sons for years, and I know Ben’s feeling a little emotional about his decision to move the office to the garages at his family home. It’s the right decision. It’ll free up some much needed money, but we’ve got a lot of stuff to pack up and move. On top of that, we’ve got employees leaving who are concerned about the company’s future, along with a new contracts manager starting.

  “Erica, make sure you’ve got everything ready, Trey said he’d be here at ten. I want to at least try to look like we know what we’re doing,” Ben shouts from his office.

  “We do know what we’re doing.”

  “Speak for yourself.” He’s right. He’s been gone for the last six years, so he’s not exactly up to scratch with how things work around here these days. I’ve got every confidence in him fixing all the mistakes I allowed to happen and keeping the company going.

  I’m bent over, stacking some of our files into a box ready to move, when a silence falls over the office. I dust my hands off on my skirt and turn around to see what’s distracted everyone.

  My chin drops and my hands start to tremble when I stare at the man standing in the doorway, waiting for someone to greet him. But it’s not just any man. It’s him, the suit. Only he’s dressed more casually in a pair of dark jeans and a perfectly pressed white shirt. It’s unbuttoned enough to remind me of how his skin tasted on my tongue, and his sleeves are rolled up to reveal the ink wrapping around them.

  His steel eyes hold mine as tension crackles between us.

  My heart races as I try to get my brain and body on the same page. Why’s he here? I didn’t even give him my name let alone my…fuck. Please tell me he’s not—

  “Trey, good to see you again,” Ben booms from behind me, breaking the spell he’d cast over the office. I know that Lauren and Betty are staring at me; their eyes are burning into my skin.

  My body is frozen as Ben walks over and the two men shake hands. He turns back, his eyes first finding Lauren’s, but he soon notices that something’s not right. His eyes narrow on me before Lauren attempts to help me out.

  “Trey, it’s so good to meet you at last.” She marches over and accepts his hand when he holds it out for her. “We’re excited to have you on board.”

  “Thank you. I’m looking forward to getting my feet under the table.” My stomach twists and I almost double over when his eyes meet mine over her shoulder.

  “Would you like a drink before we get started?”

  “Black coffee would be great.”

  “Fantastic.” Turning, Lauren pins me with a stare and starts walking towards me. When she’s in reaching distance, she grabs my forearm and pulls me along with her.

  “You fucked him, didn’t you?”

  “Wow, you don’t beat around the bush.”

  “No time for bush beating. Is this going to be a problem because—” Terrified of what her next words could be, I cut her off.

  “No, no problem. I just didn’t think I’d ever see him again.”

  “Jesus, Erica. Is there anyone in this office you haven’t slept with?” Her face twists, and I know she regrets the words the second they fall from her lips. “Shit, I didn’t mean—”

  “It’s fine. And for the record, I’ve never slept with Ben.”

  “You’ll never know how grateful I am for that.” She tries to say it light-heartedly, but I hear the pain in her voice. I hurt her more than she’ll admit by getting involved with her dad.

  “I can’t believe this is happening.” Covering my face with my hands, I will the images that are on repeat in my head from Saturday night away. The last thing I need to picture when I go out there and look in his eyes is him thrusting into me from behind.

  Fuck. My. Life.

  I’m meant to be trying to redeem myself after everything, not just bouncing from one disastrous office hook-up to another.

  “What am I meant to do?” I don’t mean for the question to be out loud, but when Lauren turns to me, I realise it was.

  “You square your shoulders, hold your head up high and walk out there like you own the place. Forget about where his fingers have been and what he looks like without his clothes on—”

  “Not that easy,” I mutter, making her chuckle.

  “You’re going to have to. He’s here to help sort this place out, not spend his days trying to figure out the best way to get you to spread your legs again.” I hear her warning loud and clear. Do not sleep with another employee and fuck this up for all of us.

  Nodding at her, accepting that my mistake with her dad is g
oing to haunt me for the rest of my life, I quickly head towards the toilets to freshen up before walking out there like she just suggested.

  Blowing out a breath, I grab the mug of coffee Lauren made for him. It sloshes about a little as my hand trembles. I pick up the documents from my desk that I’d prepared for him and take everything into the office where he’s chatting with Ben.

  “Here you go,” I say, handing over the mug, hoping that my voice comes out as strong as I intend.

  His eyes meet mine and it’s like someone knocks the wind out of me. Swallowing my desire, I place my folder on the table and consider how the hell I’m meant to have a serious conversation with him.

  “I’ve got a few documents for you to fill in and sign, then I need to take copies of your ID and your qualifications.”

  “I’ll leave you two to it. If you need anything before you start next week, just pick up the phone, yeah?” Ben says to Trey before nodding his head at both of us and leaving the room, taking all the air with him.

  “I shouldn’t keep you long.”

  “That’s a shame, because I’ve got all day.” The deepness of his voice has goosebumps pricking my skin.

  “Well, I’m kind of busy, so if we could just focus on the task in hand that would be awesome.”

  “Sure thing, sweetheart.”

  “No,” I snap. His body stills in surprise. “I’m not having any of…” I wave my hand in front of him. “That. We’re colleagues now, apparently, so it’s best we both forget everything that happened and move on. This job is important to me, and I won’t have another mistake ruin it.”

  “Mistake, huh?” His eyes darken, as if he’s remembering every second of our time together.

  “Yes. Mistake. Can you fill this in, please?” I shove the personal details form at him and blow out a frustrated breath.

  “Careful, I’ll start to think you want to get rid of me.”

  I purse my lips and bite my tongue to stop me from saying that that’s exactly what I’m doing.