Craving Redemption: Forbidden Series #4

by Lorraine, Tracy

  “So your temperature doesn’t spike every time you look at me? Your clit doesn’t throb for my touch every time I’m close?”

  “Nope, neither.”

  His eyes shine with delight as they flit between mine and my lips.

  “Just as I thought.”

  I don’t get a chance to say any more before his lips are on mine and his tongue is in my mouth. My breath catches and I sag back against the wall. Jesus, no man has ever managed to consume me quite like him before.

  His hips pin me to the wall, his solid length pressing into my stomach, and my need for more starts to get the better of me. Lifting my hand, I grip onto his muscular upper arms as his hands skim down my body.

  A little squeal passes my lips when he bites down on my bottom one before moving across my jaw and down my neck, allowing me a few minutes to drag in some much needed air.

  He sucks on the sensitive skin beneath my ear as his fingers find the bottom of my skirt.

  My surroundings vanish as his fingertips tickle their way up my bare thighs. The only thing I can focus on is where they’re heading.

  “Fuck,” he grunts when he slips my soaked knickers aside and runs his fingers through my folds.

  “Holy shit,” falls from my lips as he slides two inside me.

  “Are you ready to admit you were lying yet?”

  “Fuck, Trey.” My chest heaves as my release starts to grow closer.

  “I won’t let you come until you tell me that you want me, that you fall asleep at night wishing I’d been inside you.”

  “No, no,” I chant, although I’ve no idea what I’m really saying. All I know is that his fingers and deep voice are exactly what I need right now.

  “Erica,” he warns seconds before pulling his fingers from me.

  “I-I…fuck.” The office door flies open and Lauren walks in, totally unaware of what’s going on only feet away from her.

  “Shit. I…oh…” She quickly looks to the other side of the room, and Trey takes a step back. Coldness engulfs me, but it soon vanishes when I look back to Lauren.

  I’ve let her down again. My stomach twists in frustration with myself for not being able to do the right thing.

  “I’m so sorry,” I whisper before rushing towards my desk, grabbing my bag and running from the office. I can’t hang around and see that look in her eye. I already hate myself for everything I’ve done to her; I don’t need to make it any worse.

  Finding a taxi idling down the street, I jump in and give the driver my address, forgetting about the cost. Money isn’t my biggest concern right now.

  My body’s still wound tight as I make my way up the stairs to my flat. Pushing the door open, I head straight for my room and slam it behind me. My chest heaves from running up the stairs, but it’s still mostly from the desire still coursing through my body as I remember the feeling of Trey’s fingers stretching me open.

  “Fuck.” Dropping my head into my hands, I scream out my frustration. Why can’t I just find a decent bloke to settle down with? I’ve always known my addiction to bad boys with bad attitudes was going to get me hurt, but I never could have predicted the mess my life has become.

  I thought I’d found the one with my ex. He seemed like the perfect mix of bad boy on the outside and kind on the in. Until it turned out it was all an act, and he was just an arsehole through and through who was up to his eyeballs in debt. I was distraught the day he left, but bad soon turned to worse when the final demands and bailiffs started turning up at my door. It turned out it wasn’t only him who was drowning, because he’d put my name and address on a load of his debts. I’d worked my arse off saving for this place over the years, and because of him I was on the verge of losing it. That was when the other arsehole stepped in to help ruin my life just a little bit more.

  Not wanting to think about Nick and how he manipulated me so easily into doing whatever he wanted, I push myself from the door and walk towards my en suite. I need to wash today off me.

  Sadly, no length of shower is going to allow me to forget him. He’s well and truly under my skin, and the fucker knows it.

  I stand under the spray of the water long after I’ve used all the hot.

  Pulling on a pair of old leggings and an oversized jumper, I head out into the kitchen to make myself some comfort food.

  I’m just digging into my macaroni cheese when the front door opens and Joe appears. His face is still minging when he looks up at me, although slightly less so than earlier.

  “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me the suit is our new contracts manager. When were you planning on fessing up, exactly?” His disappointment is obvious in his voice, and it only makes me feel worse than I already do. I’m fed up of disappointing people, but it seems to be all I’m capable of these days.

  “I don’t know,” I whisper. “I didn’t exactly expect this to happen. I had no idea until he turned up the following Monday with his ID and shit.”

  “You’ve known that long and didn’t tell me?”

  “I didn’t know what to say. My main focus has been not fucking up again, but how long did that last? A few weeks at best?”

  “You weren’t to know.”

  “But I know now.”

  “So? It’s not like he’s Lauren’s dad.” My chin drops and my eyes harden. “Too soon for jokes?”

  “It’ll forever be too soon to joke about that.”

  “Seriously, Erica. This isn’t a big deal. So what, you spend your nights fantasising about the new guy. There’s no reason why you can’t.”

  “I just want to show Ben and Lauren that I’m serious, and this isn’t the way to go about it.”

  Reaching over he takes my hand in his dirty one. “They know, Erica. If they had any concerns, they would have let you go, but they haven’t. You still have a job, and they’re still your friends. Trust them. Trust yourself.”

  Blowing out a breath, I try to force the words he’s just said to settle inside me. I’m still on edge after the encounter earlier, and anything short of having his hands on me to finish the job—which isn’t happening—isn’t going to relax me.

  “I need to go and shower, but do you want to go for drinks after?”

  I stare at him, weighing up my options. Sit in here and replay everything with Trey over and over, or go and attempt to forget about it.

  “We’re going. Get your arse up and put something sexy on.” Joe’s authoritative tone leaves no room for argument, and I follow his instruction.

  Chapter Seven

  Going out with Joe didn’t really help. He tried his best to keep me entertained and to stop my mind from wandering, but no matter how hard I tried, Trey was still there in my head and under my skin. It’s going to take a lot more than a couple of glasses of alcohol to get rid of him, that’s for sure.

  Much to my relief, Trey’s hardly in the office on Friday. He’s either out on site or locked in the office with Ben going over stuff that doesn’t involve me, thank fuck. The least amount of time I can spend in an enclosed space with him the better.

  “I’ve got a table booked at Blueprint for seven-thirty. Do not be late,” Lauren warns, perching herself on the edge of my desk sometime late that afternoon once everyone else has left.

  “I…uh…”

  “Don’t even think about it, Erica. We’re all going out together. It’ll be good for everyone.”

  Rolling my eyes, I rest back in my chair and cross my arms over my chest. “Are we just going to pretend last night didn’t happen?”

  “If you want to. You didn’t look like you wanted to talk about it.”

  Dropping my head back on a sigh, I try to find the words. “I really don’t want to talk about it, but I’m…I’m sorry. I just keep fucking up, and I don’t—”

  “It’s okay.” Dragging my head forward, I find her soft blue eyes and my own fill with tears that I refuse to cry.

  “It’s not, though. I need to be working, righting my wrongs, trying to make shit up to you…and he
re I am getting caught with the new guy’s fingers inside me.”

  “Okay, so that wasn’t ideal, but you’re not fucking up, E. Trey’s hot; anyone with eyes can see that, and he seems to have a bit of a fascination with you. I would never blame you for testing that out. Who knows where it could lead.”

  “Probably with me fucking another member of staff and getting what I deserve.”

  “And what is it you think you deserve?”

  “For you to hate me.” Reaching out, she grasps my shoulders in a show of support.

  “Out of everyone, I’m the one who understands what you went through the most. Of course I don’t like it, but I also get that what happened with my dad was not your fault. He was a master manipulator, and I should be apologising to you for not seeing what was going on. He was cooking my books right under my nose and disrespecting my best friend at the same time. I hate myself for not seeing any of that. I knew exactly how much you were struggling after Matt left, and I should have been a better friend. I should have been the one to help dig you out, not him. I just—”

  I don’t allow her to say any more. Standing, I throw my arms around her shoulders and hold her tight. We’ve spoken about this before, but today I think I’m finally starting to accept that what she’s saying is true. I’ll forever blame myself for allowing that situation to happen in the first place, and for hurting Lauren when she was already going through so much shit, but I think I’m getting somewhere.

  “Thank you,” I say when I pull back from her.

  She grabs my hands to stop me walking away—not that I was going to. “You are coming tonight, aren’t you? Please don’t think that I’ll stop you doing anything with Trey. You never know, he might be the one.” I can’t help but laugh at her. “What? He’s totally your type. Brooding, hot, a bit of an arsehole on the surface but a total teddy bear beneath.”

  “How do you know what’s beneath?” My brows draw together, making Lauren laugh.

  “I can just tell. He’s a good guy, Erica. Give it a chance.”

  “And what if it doesn’t work? What if I fuck it up again and one of us has to leave?”

  “Stop worrying about the what ifs. For once, just enjoy it without worrying about the consequences.”

  That’s easier said than done. I’ve experienced the fallout more than once for acting without considering what might happen when it all goes wrong. I’ve also been fooled by the ones I thought were hard on the outside and soft in the middle. Those arseholes are good at getting what they want and then showing their full colours when it’s too late.

  “Stop worrying.”

  The main office door opens and Ben and Trey walk in, both immediately looking our way where we’re still standing with our hands together.

  “Looks like we turned up at just the right time,” Ben says with a wink. “Please continue.” His eyes flick between us as he leans back against the wall as if he’s waiting for a show.

  “You’re a pig,” Lauren says, trying to sound as serious as possible, but amusement fills her voice as she steps away from me.

  I don’t see her go. I only know she’s reached Ben when he complains about her hitting him; I’m too lost in the steel eyes that haven’t left me since they entered.

  “Seven-thirty, Erica.” She goes to leave but stops in the doorway. “And you should totally wear that little red dress you’ve got. It’ll work like a charm.” She’s gone before I can respond. Trey has no idea what my red dress might look like, but already his eyes are darkening and the muscles in his neck are tensing.

  Nope, I will not allow him to consume me, I tell myself as I turn back to my computer. Tonight, I will stay out of his way. And I will go home alone.

  * * *

  By the time I’m standing at the entrance to Blueprint in my little red dress, my stomach is full of butterflies and my hands are trembling.

  “Will you chill out? I can’t cope with you like this, it’s weird,” Joe complains, threading his arm through mine and all but dragging me inside. “Have I mentioned how hot you look? I’m kinda jealous it’s all for him.”

  “Shut up, you idiot.” Shaking my head at him, a little laugh falls from my lips.

  “What? It’s been a while since I’ve had any action.”

  “Enough.”

  Joe and I have had a fumble about a time or two when we were in need of a little tension release, and while I like to not dwell on getting freaky with one of my best friends and flatmate, he likes to bring it up as often as possible just to make me squirm. I was confused as fuck the first time he leaned in a kissed me after a night out, because I was convinced he was gay. I’d only ever seen him with men up until that point, but shit, he kissed me like he knew exactly what to do with a woman. He also wasn’t shy when we got down to it and he got me off in record time. I always thought a body like that was a waste, but knowing a woman could put it to good use did make me feel a little better. If he wasn’t one of my closest friends, I might have wanted more, but as much as I love him, romance is most definitely not in our future. I’ve heard and witnessed him with too many others to even consider it.

  I’m practically vibrating with nervous energy by the time we’re pointed towards the table. I tell myself that he won’t be here yet and that I’ll have a few minutes to get settled, but the second we round the corner, I see that none of that will be happening because we’re last.

  The second Lauren spots us approaching, she calls Joe over and he happily takes the seat next to her leaving only one free.

  Rolling my eyes at her antics, I take a step towards the vacant chair but my shoe catches on a bump on the floor and I stumble. Thankfully, Trey sees what’s about to happen, and moments before I’m expecting to get extra friendly with the floor tiles, his giant hands land on my waist. Electric sparks shoot around my body and my skin burns where we’re touching.

  Keeping my eyes on the floor, I mumble a thank you, aware that everyone’s silent around us.

  “Erica?” he breathes moments before his finger presses under my chin and forces my head up so I have no choice but to look at him. His dark eyes are full of concern, but his lips are pulled up in a sexy smirk.

  He feels the connection between us, too.

  He leans in and I suck in a breath, thinking he’s going to kiss me right here in front of everyone, but at the last minute he moves to the side so he can whisper in my ear.

  “I’m taking that dress off you tonight…with my teeth.”

  My thighs clench and my clit throbs at the thought. A flush the colour of my dress heats my cheeks and neck. He pulls back and returns to his chair as if nothing’s happened. I glance over at Lauren as I go to take my seat, and her eyes are full of delight and mischief. I narrow mine at her, hoping she realises how much I don’t appreciate her meddling, but all she does is laugh.

  I sit ramrod straight in my chair, afraid of what I’ll do if I allow myself to relax. My entire body is being called to the one next to me.

  Everyone goes back to their previous conversations while I stare at the menu, but it’s as if it’s written in another language because the only things I can focus on are his hands on my body and his hot breath against my ear.

  “You can’t stop thinking about it, can you?”

  “Don’t know what you’re talking about.” I refuse to look at him or let him see that I’m affected by his words in any way, although I fear it may be a little too late for that.

  “What do you fancy?” He nods his head towards the menu. I almost think he’s asking a serious question until his fingers brush against my bare thigh beneath the table.

  Knocking it away, I turn to him. “I don’t know. Are you allergic to anything?”

  The silver in his eyes immediately becomes obvious and his lips curl into the most incredible smile as he barks out a laugh. “Sorry to disappoint you, but even that wouldn’t stop me.”

  “Shame. What are you having?” I don’t particularly care what his dish of choice might be, but I need to
get onto safer ground, especially when I can feel multiple sets of eyes burning into me.

  “What I’m eating tonight’s not on this menu.”

  Heat fills my belly and descends to my core. Fucking hell.

  “I-I was thinking lasagne,” I stutter, hoping no one else around the table heard him. His laughter once again hits my ears and my stomach does a little flip. My head might be telling me to stay as far away from this man as possible, but it’s very obvious that the rest of my body is totally on board with everything he has to offer.

  The sexual tension is so thick between us that I can barely breathe. Everyone around us is either oblivious or they’re ignoring it. They chat away about work and life like normal while I sit here, trying not to melt into a puddle on the seat at just being able to feel his body heat.

  Every few seconds his eyes flick over to me, but I refuse to return his stare, too afraid of what I might do or suggest if I look into them.

  He lowers his cutlery to his plate and drops his hands from the table once he’s finished eating. I think nothing of it until the continued movement of his arm catches my eye seconds before his fingertips trail up my thigh once again.

  I suck in a breath, successfully managing to inhale a bit of my lasagne at the same time. Coughing, I manage to drag the attention of everyone at our table, but at no point does Trey remove his hand from me—in fact, he uses my coughing fit to turn into me so not only can he start touching me up, but he can tap me on the back to look like he’s assisting.

  “I’m good, thanks,” I mutter when he continues hitting my back long after I’ve finished.

  “You sure will be.” The promise in his voice makes my thighs clench. His lips curl the moment he feels it, and it gives him the encouragement he needs.

  Thinking the show’s over, everyone turns away from us, giving Trey the opportunity he needs to slide his hand higher.

  I once again suck in a breath when his fingers brush against the lace of my underwear.