Craving Redemption: Forbidden Series #4

by Lorraine, Tracy

  I knew what he wanted, and I could give him what he needed.

  Whatever this is, this getting to know each other…it scares me. If he gets to know me, that means I’ve allowed him in, and that gives him power.

  It gives him the power to break me, and I promised myself I’d never give anyone that kind of power over me again. I can only pick myself up so many times, and I’m not sure I’d survive the level of heartache Trey could cause if I were to give him the chance.

  Bringing the car to a stop, he pulls the handbrake and his stare burns into my skin.

  “Thank you for a lovely evening.”

  He’s silent for a few seconds. Thinking he’s not going to say any more, I undo the seat belt and put my hand on the handle.

  “Spend the weekend with me,” he blurts out.

  “W-what?” I stutter.

  His fingers twist with mine and he tugs my arm so I have no choice but to turn back towards him. His face is deadly serious and hope shines from his eyes.

  “Spend the weekend with me. Get to know the real me. Let me show you who I am, prove that you can trust me.”

  “Uh…” My eyes run over every inch of his face, looking for any indication that he’s joking, but I find nothing.

  My heart hammers against my chest as I fight to drag in the air I need, but it’s like someone’s suddenly sucked it all out of the car.

  “I…uh…I need to go.” He allows me to pull my hand from his and, as quickly as I can, I jump from the car and practically run towards the building. His eyes don’t leave me the entire way to the front door, but I don’t dare turn around. Instead, I pull the keys from the bottom of my bag and let myself into the ground floor flat.

  “Hello?” my sister shouts, sounding a little panicked from the living room.

  “It’s just me.”

  Samantha pops her head around the doorframe, concern etched into every one of her features. “What’s happened?”

  “You got any wine?”

  “You know it. Come on.”

  I follow behind her towards her kitchen, stopping on the way to say hello to her fiancé.

  I sit at her small dining table as she pulls a bottle from the fridge and fills two glasses.

  “So, tell me about him.”

  “How do you know there’s a him?” She lifts a brow but doesn’t say anything. “Okay, fine. Yeah, there’s a him.”

  “I’m waiting.”

  “I hooked up with this guy a couple of weeks ago. Totally my type. He’s—”

  “An arsehole?”

  “What?” My brows pinch together.

  “Oh come on, Erica. We both know exactly what your type is. You’ve got this natural ability to pick out the utter scumbags every single time. How is this guy any different?”

  My sudden need to defend Trey to my sister freaks me out. I don’t really know him, so he could very well be as bad as all the others, even if deep down I really want to believe he’s different.

  “Anyway, he turned up at work. He’s our new contracts manager.”

  A laugh falls from her lips. “You’re kidding, right?”

  “I wish.”

  “Jesus, Erica. How do you end up in these situations?”

  “Fucked if I know.”

  “So now what? You’ve been with him again, I assume?”

  My face heats. “He just took me out for dinner and asked me to spend the weekend with him.”

  “Okay. So…why are you here?”

  “He wanted to take me home, but I gave him your address instead.”

  “Why?” she asks, confusion written all over her face.

  I pause briefly, wondering if I should tell her the truth. In the end, I do with a half-truth. “I don’t want him getting too close.”

  “So he thinks you live here?”

  “I guess so.”

  “What did you say about the weekend?”

  “I didn’t. I ran.”

  “Fucking hell, Erica.”

  Chapter Twelve

  Although Trey hasn’t said anything about the weekend, I can see the question written all over his face every time he looks at me. I hate it. I’ve no idea what I should do. I hate everything right now. I hate that he seems to be giving me the space that I thought I needed, and I hate that he’s no longer the demanding lover that he was at the beginning. I fear he’s softening, and fuck if it wasn’t his demanding attitude that made him so damn irresistible in the first place.

  It’s just after lunchtime when he disappears out of the office for a site visit, and I pull my phone from my bag. Seeing a missed call from my sister hours ago, I return it straight away.

  “I’ve got something pretty impressive for you.”

  “Sorry, I’m not into chicks,” I say with a laugh. If it were Trey’s deep voice saying those words, I’d damn near lose my shit.

  “Ha, you’re funny. Has lover boy said anything to you?”

  “Not really, he’s been pretty quiet actually. Why?”

  “Because I’ve got the biggest bunch of flowers I think I’ve ever seen sitting in my living room, and they’ve got your name on them.”

  “Shut the fuck up. You’re joking, right?”

  “Nope. You need to come and get them before Cliff starts thinking I’m having an affair weeks before our wedding.”

  “He’d never think that, but I’ll stop by after work.”

  “I’m sending you a picture now. You need to see them.”

  “Okay, see you later.”

  I’ve barely hung up when my phone vibrates with a picture.

  “Fucking hell,” I mutter to myself, my eyes widening in shock at the sheer number of flowers. Another picture comes through, and it’s of the back of the card.

  10am Saturday morning. Pack a bag.

  Excitement and fear hit my stomach, making it turn over. Spending the weekend with him is dangerous, but can I say no?

  Before leaving for the day, I check the calendar. He’s booked in for a meeting with Ben after work. Knowing he’ll be coming back any minute, I make a rash decision.

  Grabbing a Sharpie from the pen pot on his desk, I find tomorrow in his diary and write across it, much like he did in mine last week.

  See you soon. E x

  A bolt of excitement races through me and, before I can change my mind and rip the page from his diary, I run from the office.

  * * *

  “Whoa, who’d you piss off?” Joe asks once I’ve fought my way into our flat with the giant arrangement of flowers I picked up from my sister’s.

  “I love how you think I must have annoyed someone to receive something like this,” I sulk, dropping them to the kitchen counter and shaking out my arms.

  “Why else would someone…wait? Do not tell me Trey sent them?”

  “What do you think?”

  “I think he’s not the kind of guy to do romantic shit like that.” He plucks the card from the middle and flips it over. “Ha, see. It’s just a fancy booty call. You really spending the weekend with him?”

  “Yes. No. Maybe.” The whole way home, I regretted pretty much agreeing to it, although I’ve no way of knowing if he’s seen my note.

  “Want to come out for a drink to help you decide?”

  “Nah, I think I’ll stay in, have a bath or something.”

  “Erica Wilde refusing a drink on a Friday night. What is happening right now?”

  “Oh shut up. It’s not that unusual.” His raised eyebrow tells me that it really is, but I ignore it. I need to decide what I’m going to do, and going out and getting drunk is not going to help making a rational decision.

  “Oh wait…you’re going to spend the night pruning, ready for your hot weekend, aren’t you?” His eyes drop between my legs inquisitively.

  “Nope. That’s already been taken care of, thank you very much.”

  “I’m sure he’ll appreciate that. Well, if you’re being a boring bitch, I think I’ll leave you to it.”

  “Have fun,” I call wh
en he gets to the front door. “And if you bring someone home, make sure they’re quiet.”

  “You’d better hope I bring someone home, otherwise I’ll be coming after you, it’s been so fucking long.”

  Laughing at him, I wish him luck and watch him disappear.

  I spend the entire night trying to decide if I should pack a bag or not. My body says ‘fuck yes’; it’s begging for that amount of one-on-one time with Trey, but my head is screaming something very different. I just don’t know which one is shouting louder, and I can't deny that what my body wants is so fucking tempting.

  * * *

  I wake later than I was expecting the next morning, after a fitful night’s sleep full of indecision and dirty dreams. The second I swing my legs off the side of the bed, I know what I need to do.

  Dragging my suitcase from the top of my wardrobe, I make quick work of stuffing everything I might need inside before having a very quick shower, curling my hair, applying my make-up and sliding my favourite dress up my body. I want to look sexy without looking like I’ve put too much effort into it.

  After sending my sister a text so she’s expecting me, I make myself a coffee in my travel mug and set off. I’m already running a little late. The last thing I want is for him to think I decided against his offer after all of this.

  I’m a nervous wreck by the time the taxi pulls up outside my sister’s house. My palms are sweating and I swear a zoo full of fucking butterflies have taken up residence in my stomach. The journey took longer than it usually would, thanks to some festival in the local park.

  “You look like you're about to puke,” my sister helpfully points out when she lets me in.

  “I need to pee.”

  Her laughter follows me down to her bathroom, where I have another nervous wee before joining her in the living room. I sit on the chair in front of the window so I can see the second he pulls up.

  “I’m not sure I’ve ever seen you so unsure of yourself.”

  “Not helping,” I mutter, my eyes glued to the window.

  “I know I’ve not met this guy, but something tells me he’s different.”

  Now that gets my attention. “Different how?”

  “You’re different. Although you’re nervous as shit right now, I can’t help feeling like something’s settled inside you.”

  Narrowing my eyes at her cryptic statement, I turn back to the window. “That’s all well and good, whatever it’s meant to mean, but where the hell is he? It’s almost ten past.”

  “I’m sure he’s coming. You said yourself that the traffic was bad.”

  Blowing out a slow breath, I tell myself that she’s right. He’ll be here.

  By twenty past ten, I’m starting to lose my shit. I spent all night worrying about this and he hasn’t even bothered to show his face. Was it all one big joke?

  “Has he tried ringing? Where’s your phone?”

  Pulling my bag from the floor, I slide my hand into the pocket where it lives. Empty. Shit. Rummaging through each pocket, my heart starts to race.

  “I can’t find it.”

  Dropping to my knees, I open my little suitcase and start pulling everything out in case it got tangled in something.

  “Shit, shit, shit.” Huffing out a frustrated breath, I try to think of when I last had it while surrounded by the contents of my case. “It’s next to the fucking coffee machine.”

  “He’s probably rung to say he’s running late or something. Just chill, yeah?”

  “Yeah,” I agree although I feel anything but chilled right now.

  I’m just about to start stuffing everything back into my case when the buzzer rings loudly throughout the flat. My eyes widen in panic as I look at Sam, who’s moving to look out the window.

  “It’s him. I’ll go—”

  “No,” I whisper-shout. “Do not open the door.”

  “Why?”

  “He still thinks I live here.”

  Shaking her head at me, my sister drops to her knees to help me collect up all my stuff and attempt to get it back inside my case. “You do know you’re only going for one night, right?” she asks, counting the number of knickers I flung across her living room.

  “You never know how many you’ll need on a dirty weekend.”

  “TMI, lil’ sis.” I can’t help but laugh at the horrified look on her face—that is, until the buzzer goes off again.

  “Shit.”

  “Go fucking answer it, then.”

  “Okay, okay.” Smoothing down my hair, I wheel my case out into the hallway. “Hide!” Sam puts her hands up in defeat and backs into the room, out of sight.

  I take a second to attempt to compose myself, but after the last ten minutes I think it might be a lost cause.

  I flick the lock but don’t get a chance to pull the door open because it’s done for me. He takes one look at me and steps a little closer, concern filling his steel eyes.

  “What’s wrong?”

  My forehead wrinkles. “Nothing, why?”

  “I’ve been trying to call you, and you look at bit harassed.”

  “I’m fine. I left my phone at…” I trail off just in time to catch myself before I admit that I don't live here. “At Joe’s.”

  A noise from behind me forces me to look over my shoulder. All I can do is roll my eyes at my sister who’s still hidden from Trey, but I can clearly see her alternating between fanning herself and putting her thumbs up.

  “As long as you’re okay.” When I look back, his eyes are following mine.

  “I’m really good. Shall we go?” Placing my hand on his chest, his eyes immediately come back to me, darkening as our gaze holds for a few seconds. I’m beginning to get used to the sparks between us, and the butterflies that had settled in my stomach slightly take flight again.

  “This bag?” he asks, nodding down to my little case.

  “That’s the one.” Following him out, I stop to pull the door closed and find my sister making very inappropriate gestures at Trey’s back. Flipping her off, I close the door and run to catch up with him.

  “Where are we going?” I ask once we’re settled and he’s pulled away from the curb.

  “It’s a surprise.”

  “It’s a kinky sex den, isn’t it?” The deep laugh that fills the car warms me all the way to my toes. It tells me that I made the right decision in agreeing to spend time with him, although it also confirms that if—when—this goes south, it’s going to hurt like hell.

  * * *

  “I always thought these places would be in a basement or some old warehouse in the middle of no here,” I say when he pulls down a long driveway with only grass and fields as far as I can see.

  “I’m sure they probably are. I wouldn’t know, I’ve not been.”

  “I’m not sure if I’m relieved or disappointed,” I admit with a laugh. “Holy shit.” My breath catches as we hit the top of the small hill we were climbing and the hotel he’s brought us to is revealed.

  “Stunning, isn’t it?”

  “It’s…it’s really something.”

  “What’s wrong? Don’t you like it?” He pulls the car to a stop and turns towards me. My eyes stay on the grand building in front of us, afraid to look his way and exposing my anxiety.

  “I…uh…I don’t fit in in a place like this. I don’t have the kind of money these people do or own the kind of clothes they wear. I’m just not—”

  “Erica,” he interrupts. His warm fingers brush across my cheek, and I’m forced to turn to look at him, although I keep my eyes downcast. “Look at me.” I follow his demand like always and meet his hard eyes. “You’re already the most beautiful woman staying in this hotel. I don't even need to get out of the car to know that. You don’t need money or designer clothes to fit in in a place like this. You just need to have confidence. I know you have plenty—it’s one of the things I find so sexy about you. Hold your head up high, because I can guarantee that every man in that place is going to be jealous that you’re he
re with me and sleeping in my bed tonight.”

  Tears burn, but I refuse to allow them to fill my eyes. I won’t allow him to see my vulnerability and insecurities.

  “Okay. Lead the way.”

  With his hand possessively in the small of my back, he walks us towards the entrance. The huge white building is by far the fanciest I’ve ever been in, let alone stayed in.

  “Good morning, how can I help you?” The receptionist gives Trey her megawatt smile, and I can't help but step a little closer to him when her eyes drop to check him out. It’s a move that doesn’t go unnoticed by him, and he drops a kiss to the top of my head to really nail the point home.

  “We have a room booked under Bennett.”

  She taps away on her keys before producing a key and pointing us in the direction of our room.

  “It’s on the top floor?” I ask when he presses the button in the lift.

  “It is, and it’s nothing less than you deserve.” My blush heats my cheeks and spreads down my neck. I’ve never in my life been treated like this, and I’ve no idea how to take it.

  “I’ve never stayed in a place like this before. No one’s ever taken me anywhere, in fact.” The words are out of my mouth before I realise I said them aloud.

  As he turns to me, the intensity in his eyes forces me to take a step back until I bump into the handrail.

  “Then it’s time I showed you how you should be treated.” His hand wraps around the back of my neck and I’m powerless but to move towards his lips when his head dips. His lips brush mine in the gentlest of kisses, so alien to the harsh and dominant ones I’ve experienced from him before.

  My heart races and my skin tingles with the need for more. Unfortunately, when the lift announces our arrival, all he does is take my hand and lead me out.

  The room he takes me to is beyond my wildest dreams. It’s got the biggest bed I’ve ever seen, covered in the most luxurious gold and cream sheets. All the furniture is huge and made of solid wood, but the space is so big that they almost look too small. The best bit is the french doors which lead to a balcony that looks out over the grounds.