My Name Is Lost

by Taki Drake

  I was still shaking, but it wasn’t because I was cold. Numbness was creeping through my body with a slow oozing that dragged my energy and will down into a sinking hole of despair, and I seemed helpless to stop it.

  Faintly, I felt two sets of arms pushing and pulling me to move. Lost in the dark cloud surrounding me, I noted the release of the painful pressure on my knees and recognize that I was now sitting on something.

  Then, Willow was there with chicken soup and a spoon. While Drelba was doing something I could hear but not see, the younger woman was trying to get more soup inside of me instead of just splattering it on my outside. The combination of my violent shaking and flagging energy make her job harder, but she continued to feed me, murmuring words of encouragement that I did not understand.

  I probably should have been embarrassed by my collapse and my inability to control myself, but I didn’t care. The soup tasted so good, and the warmth of the blankets slowly countered the numbness that had been spreading through me. Concentrating on those sensations, when the voice in my head spoke again, I jerked in startlement, missing a spoonful of soup.

  << The wisewoman's wards are causing this,>> the thought came unbidden. <>

  Over the next few minutes, the shaking slowly subsided, and I could feel my self-control returning to me. Willow continued to feed me the delicious soup, and I relaxed into a rare feeling of being taking care of.

  This time the thought was faint and weak as it said, <>

  With that, the presence of the voice in my head disappeared as if it had never been there. My fear abated, but I still wondered who or what that voice was.

  Calm once again, I reopened my eyes and looked around. The windows were open, and with the breeze blowing through the room, it was quite comfortable, even with my arms trapped inside the blankets. Spicy smells of drying herbs and potions scented the air, and I took a couple of deep breaths and tried to relax even further.

  I squirmed a bit and got my arms free of the encumbering coverings. Gently, I caught Willow’s hands and took the soup and spoon from her. “Thank you, but I’m okay now. I can do it for myself.”

  Chapter 7 – Tattoos and Warriors

  During my brief breakdown, the two women had moved me to the couch. Both of them were now staring at my hand in wonder and concern, where the snake tattoo was still visible. “It moved,” said Willow in a slightly fearful voice.

  “Yes,” I replied. “I didn’t think tattoos could move either. It was on my back yesterday morning.”

  Shrugging free of the blankets, I stood up and took off my shirt. The women gasped in unison as they saw the size and extent of the tattoo. Looking down on it, even I was impressed.

  The tattoo stretched from the back of my hand, past my elbow and over my shoulder, and slid out of my sight onto my back. The body of the snake was wrapped several times around my arm, almost looking alive.

  Willow reached out to touch it, and I drew back an alarm. “No, please don’t. I’m not sure if it’s safe,” I said.

  Drelba agreed, saying, “Remember that the tattoo has fangs. If it can move, the snake might be able to attack.”

  “Is that possible?” Willow asked, wide-eyed.

  “I’m unsure, and you do not know. What have you learned about situations like this?” Drelba asked the question, obviously directed at her apprentice.

  “Don’t proceed, do your research,” answered Willow promptly.

  “I had been told that you mean me no harm. Your treatment of me up to this point would support that, although I am at a large disadvantage here,” I offered as I glanced about the room. Tenseness that I did not know I was carrying disappeared as I saw all my weapons, carefully propped next to the front door.

  It said a lot for my state of mind that during my panic attack, I had not noticed the swords being taken from me. Fortunately for my continuing peace of mind, I had all of my possessions still available to me, including the daggers that the two women had left on me. Surely, if they meant me harm, they would have removed those.

  “That would be correct. We mean you no harm, but I know that the village is in danger. All the signs and portents that I have read for the last several months have told me that. Lately, those same omens have indicated that a swordsman would come to town and be able to help us,” Drelba answered. “Now, here you are all of a sudden, bearing two swords and moving like a master blade warrior. I’m hoping you will be willing and able to help us.”

  Willow gulped and asked, “Please! I know I have lived here my whole life, but the people in this village are good, and the omens are very dire.” The young woman was still wide-eyed, but now had an expression of dawning hope. For some reason, it warmed my heart to think that I might be able to help.

  Realizing that the Wisewoman thought I was the village’s best hope made me feel a sense of pressure and responsibility that was not uncomfortable. Instead, I felt like I could be useful. They had already shown me and unstinting care when I had my panic attack. Given the lack of memory that I labored under, I did not think I had a better place to be than here in the village and helping them with their problems.

  When I told the Wisewomen that, both Drelba and Willow sighed with relief.

  Willow took a few deep breaths and looked at me curiously. “What do you want as compensation?” Willow asked me, leaning forward.

  “I don’t need anything except a place to stay.”

  “Drelba, can he stay with us?” The young woman anxiously asked her teacher.

  “Yes, Willow, he can. I am pretty sure that there is not any other place or family in the village that would have him yet, given our previous experience with people in his condition. And it would be cruel to banish him to a barn to sleep with the animals. Also, I do not know how we can expect somebody to help defend us if we do not extend some level of trust to him.”

  “Good!” Willow said, smiling happily. For some reason, her expression reminded me of Marissa’s when she saw Delman approaching the town.

  Suddenly feeling disoriented, I decided to ask some questions of my own, saying, “I have a few questions, please?” I needed to better understand some of the dynamics of the political scene, and it would be beneficial if I could get the available background on the Thing.

  “Certainly,” was Drelba’s immediate reply.

  “What can you tell me about the Thing? What’s up with Marissa and Delman? What nobleman controls this area? And lastly, is anyone in the village trained to fight?”

  “My goodness! Let me answer that in order. First of all, there is not much that I can tell you about the creature that we call the Thing. The only real information we know about it relates to its footprints, and they look human. We can tell this because the mark is of a naked foot. The thing that is the most frightening about it is that the print is approximately ten times larger than the feet of the biggest man in the village.”

  “Yikes. So it’d be over 25 feet tall and weigh over two tons. Damn, that virtually guarantees magic is involved in the creation if not the powering of their body, or they’d collapse.”

  Drelba nodded in agreement and continued to answer me, saying, “Marissa and Delman are engaged and going to be married in a year or two. It has been a long-standing arrangement, and he has been waiting for her to be old enough to know her own mind. That farmer is a very considerate person, and both of them are totally in love with each other. It is very nice to see, and they both deserve happiness.”

  “I thought it was something like that but did not want to ask either one of them. Thank you for letting me know.”

  Willow interjected, asking with the edge of jealousy in her voice, “Why did you want to know that? Were you attracted to Marissa?”

  I laughed and told her quickly, “Absolutely not! Delman has been very helpful to me, and I was
confused by his interaction with Marissa. I considered him important in my work with the village and wanted to make sure that I was not misunderstanding the situation.”

  The expression on Drelba’s face was contained but amused. For some reason, she was trying to hide how funny she found the dealings between Willow and me, and I did not understand why.

  The Wisewoman continued to answer my questions, saying, “Lord Guilford is the nobleman that controls this village. He is best described as an absentee landlord, one that does not get upset as long as we pay our tithe and taxes.”

  Thinking back to the map and the information that I had tried to absorb from the book in the secret stronghold, I had a rough idea of the area of influence of Guilford and a few clues on how he related to the other noblemen. Now, I wish I had paid more attention to what was written there, but I knew that in a pinch, I can go back and reread that information.

  Drelba was answering my last question, and I wrenched my mind back so that I could actively listen to what she was saying. Unfortunately, her comments confirmed my worst nightmare.

  “No one here is trained as a fighter, a warrior, or even a guard. Additionally, even if someone were a trained warrior, it probably would not help. Living in this area, they would be terribly out of practice, and military people do not enjoy a good reputation here. That is why we have been hoping for someone to come who might stop the raids.”

  “I will do what I can, but I am not sure of all of my abilities. In addition to the rest of my lost memory, I do not know what I can do until I have actually done it.”

  “The moving tattoo proves something is special about you. I have never seen nor heard of any similar marking. But you and I agree on one thing, and that is that you will not know who or what you are until you face an enemy across the edge of your blade.”

  A short hard bark of laughter escaped through my mouth, and I said, “Apparently, that knowledge will be something I can gain fairly soon. You have already said that a raid will occur not too long from now.”

  Drelba nodded. “The last raid was over three months ago, and it is approaching the time for the next one. I’m not sure what happened to you a few minutes ago, but are you doing okay now?”

  “Yes, I’m better. I don’t know what’s happening with me, but for now, I’m okay. I think it would be best for me to scout the village if I’m going to defend this place. I am sure that I will have other questions when I come back.”

  “That makes perfect sense,” she replied. “Come back here when you are done or worn out, whichever comes first. We will have dinner ready and be anxious to hear what you figured out.”

  I collected my swords and exited their house. The afternoon sunlight felt warm and comforting, and I set about learning the sounds, the layout, and smells of Delton. I had a feeling I would need all that knowledge and more. It was time to build a better mental map.

  Chapter 8 – Supper with Friends

  I had spent several hours wandering around the village and familiarizing myself with the layout and some of the people that might be involved in any attack. For the most part, people were friendly, although reserved.

  Everyone seemed to understand who I was but seemed willing to suspend judgment until they could see how I performed. From some of the comments that I had heard, I realized that the other two men that had come to the village with missing memories had been violent and predatory. No one had expected me to be anything but more of the same type of person. The fact that I was so much different confused them.

  I got back to the Wisewoman’s home just in time for dinner. I could smell the food when I was a half-block away. By the time I got to the door, my stomach was growling, and I was almost drooling.

  They had been waiting for me, and all three of us sat down immediately to eat. If anything, the taste was better than the smell. Everything was prepared well, and I almost moaned with pleasure as I ate. Praising Drelba and Willow for the excellent meal, I leaned back in contentment for a moment, before offering to take care of the cleanup.

  I found it amusing that the Wisewoman and her apprentice were both shocked at my offer. When I said that it was fair that I do at least some of the work, they accepted my offer but stayed in the kitchen to keep me company.

  Willow had changed while I’d been out, and her new outfit was much more revealing. As I washed the dishes, I said, “I did not realize that we were supposed to change for dinner. I could have washed up and put on a different garment if you had preferred.”

  “I spilled some grease on my dress while helping Drelba with dinner,” Willow explained with a blush. It sounded lame to my ears, and I noticed Drelba was looking disapprovingly at the younger woman. Intercepting that stern look, Willow blushed even more, and exclaimed, “Well, I did!”

  Drelba smiled at the younger woman’s obvious embarrassment and winked at me. I realized that I must have missed something obvious, something that I should have understood. I hated feeling so slow to comprehend the nuances of what was going on. Must be another one of those things I’ve forgotten, dammit.

  Nothing of import was discussed while I washed the table down and took care of the dishes and leftover food, but I noted how comfortable the women were with each other and how complimentary. It was apparent to me that both women knew how to cook and that they honestly liked and respected each other.

  Once I had finished the cleanup, the three of us moved to the sitting room. This room was the most formal of any of the chambers that I had seen in the Wisewoman’s house. There were several pieces of furniture in the sitting room, including a three-person couch and a pair of chairs, each with their own small side table. That grouping made for a comfortable place for us to sit down and talk for a while.

  For a short time, the women continued to ask me about what I had seen in the village. Even while I was answering them, part of my attention was focused on what other information I can gather about these two women from their living spaces. Soon, the two women began to discuss their mutual work, and I got up to move around the room.

  Going closer to the fireplace to warm my hands, I wandered past the small display cabinet on one side of the room, looking at the items that Drelba treasured. Not seeing anything of particular note there, I also checked out the books in the small bookcase on the other side of the room.

  The books there were mostly reference works, focused on the sorts of things that a Wisewoman would typically do in a village. I was somewhat surprised to see a book on the political structure of the land in addition to the conventional ones covering medicines and plant life.

  There were two doors on the wall furthest from the kitchen that Drelba had told me led to their bedrooms. I knew that tonight, as well as for the foreseeable future, I would be sleeping on the couch. Considering my height, it was a good thing the sofa was designed to seat three.

  All during the after-dinner conversation, I had been thinking about how the town could be defended against the Thing. My instincts told me that the fortification was useless, and if the Thing was as large as suspected, it’d punch through it in seconds or step over it. I kept running through options and strategies in my mind, but nothing jumped out at me as the right solution.

  In general, I was not paying attention to the conversation between the Wisewoman and her apprentice. They were discussing hedge magics and their applications, using terms that made little or no sense to me. Drelba had a book open, and the two of them were reading together from a page and arguing technique.

  There was a break in the conversation when Willow yawned in midsentence. The sign of tiredness was contagious, and Drelba mimicked her. Putting a hand on her lower back, the older woman stretched a few seconds later. Unable to resist the draw of peer behavior, I found myself yawning even though I was not especially tired.

  Drelba spoke to both of us, “Bedtime! Willow, get the sheets and pillow for the couch.”

  “Yes, Wise One,” replied Willow. The younger woman headed into her room, and I heard another door
open.

  The older woman got up from the couch and put the book away in the bookcase before seating herself in the chair closest to the fire. Pointing to the other chair, Drelba ordered, “Sit. All you will do is get in Willow’s way since you do not know where the bedding is located.” Obediently, I sat down and relaxed in the sensation of the fire's warmth.

  Willow came out a short time later with an overstuffed pillow and two sheets. She wrapped the couch cushions in one of them and handed me the other along with the pillow, and said, “Hopefully, this will be enough to make you comfortable. I hope you sleep well, and I will see you in the morning.”

  Drelba stood up and wish me a good sleep as well before both the women went into their bedrooms and close the doors. I could hear faint sounds from both of them as they got ready for bed and the occasional bark of the few watchdogs in the village. However, I was uneasy for some reason and decided to make one more circuit of the common parts of the house.

  Since my night vision was excellent, I did not need to carry a lamp with me as I checked to make sure all the shutters were closed over the windows, and the doors were secured. I could not hear any unusual sounds from the outside. I told myself that the tension that tightened my shoulders and clutched my stomach cater to my spine was just from being in another strange place.

  Deciding to at least get off my feet while I tried to find the optimal strategy for defending the village, I arrange the pillow and the other sheet to my satisfaction before disarming.

  I removed all of my swords from my body but left the sheaths strapped in place. They would not bother my rest, and this way, I had them if I ended up carrying my longer weapons in a hurry. The shortsword I put on the floor, within easy reach. My other two blades were placed on the top of one of the small tables that I moved closer to the head of the couch.

  The other blades I left in their sheaths, not wanting to be unarmed even here where I felt safe. The map in my head was clear, showing the locations of all my weapons and everything else in the house that I had noted as being useful in the case of an attack. With the comfort of that awareness, I lay down on the couch and tried to relax.