by Nikki Marsh
"I understand. Believe me. I've learned my lesson."
"Be prepared for a visit from your next Spiritual Guide. Anoint yourself every day. Do no harm. Study. Be patient."
I hoped that what Miss Marie said about Suzanne not planning to harm Maman was true, but that didn’t relieve my fear about the harm she could do to Maman or me. It wasn’t only Maman who was at risk, my relationship with Stefan was, too. With Auntie so distracted, Stefan away at school, and Suzanne's possession of Maman, I had more time to work on myself and with Miss Marie. I had never thought of myself as powerful or believed I could be, but I threw myself into the job of mastering my Gift and hoped I was wrong. The more I learned, the more I realized the truth. If I had real power, I must use it the right way, at the right time, and for the right reason. No exceptions.
Chapter Seventeen
Practice Makes Perfect
Before long, an enslaved mulatto woman visited me in a dream and carried me to a hush harbor, a swamp where slaves secretly gathered for African worship. They formed a closed circle and sang in cautious voices.
"I am Coco," she hushed as she moved to the center of the circle.
Moonlight filtered through the dense trees, providing the only light. A fire might have alerted slave patrols, always eager to use their whips and shotguns on runaways or slaves found off the plantation. A few slaves kept watch and signaled if any approached.
Coco stood tall and dignified, her piercing black eyes fixed on me.
"The white man stole me, shackled me, collared me, raped me, enslaved me, stripped me of my name, and robbed me of my native tongue. He believed he took away everything from me. He believed he separated me from everyone I loved. He believed he separated me from everyone who loved me. He was wrong."
"Amen." "Yes." "That's right." "Sho 'nuff." Other slaves signaled their agreement. Coco raised her voice, speaking first in Creole, and then in English.
"Though the white savage emptied my hands of earthly possessions and brutalized my body, he had no power strong enough to separate me from the wisdom and power of the Old Africans who live inside me." She spoke defiantly.
"I am a part of them, and they are a part of me. Their ancient knowledge and traditions traveled with me. They are inside all of us waiting to be unlocked."
She gestured for me to join her in the circle.
"What is your name?"
"Gabbie."
"What do you want?"
Such a simple question gave me pause. What did I want? I wanted to liberate Maman's spirit, but was that enough for me? What if I liberated her, but Suzanne found other ways to get her revenge? Did I want to limit my powers to liberating Maman? What about Stefan? One thing I had learned from my training is I had to be crystal clear about what I wanted.
"I want to reap the ancient knowledge that lies dormant within me - the knowledge of the natural elements and the knowledge of the supernatural elements."
"What would you do with that knowledge?"
"A tormented spirit possesses my Maman. I want to free her from it. I must cross the Veil that separates the living from the dead and retrieve our Family Grimoire to do it."
She thought about what I said.
"The Ancient Africans pass down their knowledge by the spoken word, not written in a book."
I told her about Pisatuntema and about my unlimited capacity to remember what I learn.
"You must go to the goddess Aja, the Wild Wind, and your Spiritual Guide, who can enlighten you with the knowledge of the old Africans. With this knowledge, you will become a most powerful Juju."
Coco took off her patchwork shawl and placed it on me. It transported me to a lush African forest with all kinds of flowering plants and towering trees. Small and large animals, from forest elephants and gorillas, to chimpanzees and exotic birds lived in harmony. Something in me connected with the forest. I had no fear of the animals or fear of the unknown. I felt welcome.
Aja rested at the base of a huge broad-leaf tree blending in so completely, she seemed a part of it. Golden leaves covered her breasts, highlighting her rich brown skin. Colorful flowers grew in her thick, black hair and framed her radiant face. The only other clothing she wore was a short raffia skirt.
"Welcome to my forest," she said as she stood up.
"My name is Gabbie, and Coco sent me to gain the knowledge of my African Ancestors."
"First, I must anoint you." I wondered if this was the origin of the anointing ceremonies I learned from Miss Marie.
Aja held her hand over my head, and a cool stream of water dripped down my face. She chanted in her language for several minutes.
"Are you ready?"
"Yes, I am."
"Take my hand."
I blacked out, but my mind absorbed information about new elements such as Gum Arabic, Bitter Aloe, Wormwood, Rooibos, Pennywart, Madagascan Periwinkle, Honeybush, Devil's Claw, Bitter Melon, Umckaloabo, Geraniaceae, African Star Grass. I learned about them and more on my journey with her. My mind captured information I didn't remember learning.
Before I left, Aja gave me a Gbo, an amulet made from magical stone.
"You will need this to become invisible. When you invoke its power, it will shield you from the eyes of others. Carry it with you in a pocket, wear it as a necklace - whatever you wish. When you desire to invoke its power, hold it in your hands, close your eyes and chant."
Clothe me in your special light.
Keep my presence out of sight.
Make me vanish from the eyes
Of earthly beings beneath the skies.
"How do I become visible again?"
"When you want to be seen again, close your eyes, hold the Gbo, and say these words three times:
'Turn off the special light.
Make me seen by those with sight.'”
"Will I be able to make others invisible, like someone who is helping me?"
"Only if that person has a close connection to you. First swear that person to secrecy, and the person must hold your hand, and recite the chant with you."
"I will."
"Be careful that you only share this power with those you trust the most. In the wrong hands, it may do much harm, and you would be the one responsible for it."
When I awoke, I held the Gbo in my hand.
✽✽✽
The only people I trusted were Felicie, Stefan, and Julian. Sharing it with Stefan was out of the question. Besides, he was away at school. Felicie would be too frightened. I wanted to share this power with Julian. I couldn't wait to tell him.
"So, now you can make yourself disappear?" Julian asked after I told him about my journey.
"It's not that I disappear and go somewhere else. I'm still here, but no one can see me because this Gbo gives out a light that shields me." I pulled out the Gbo.
"Do you want to try it?" I hoped he would.
He looked at me suspiciously.
"Have you tried it yet?"
"No. I need someone to help me test it in case something goes wrong."
"Like what?"
"Like not becoming visible again."
"What could I do?" he asked. "Who can make you visible again?"
"Miss Marie, probably."
"Don't you think she should be around for your first try?"
I got the impression this scared Julian.
"I think I can do this, Julian. My powers are stronger, and I am not afraid anymore."
"Julian agreed to help. I stood in front of him, pulled the Gbo from my skirt pocket, cupped it in my hands, and recited the chant three times.
After a few seconds, Julian spoke.
"You did something wrong. I can't see your body, but I see your clothes. It looks like they're stuffed with paper or something. Sit down."
I sat on the settee, but he only saw my clothes moving like my body was still there.
"The chant is right. I must have done something wrong."
"It's a good thing you tried this on me before you tried it on so
meone else," he gloated.
"You're right." I thought for a moment.
As soon as I did, I realized I hadn't closed my eyes.
Despite his skepticism, my first attempt at invisibility impressed Julian. I took a few minutes to focus on what I had learned.
"OK, I know what I did wrong. My eyes weren't closed. Now, I will make my entire self disappear."
My second attempt succeeded! Julian couldn't see me or my clothes.
"Can you hear me?" I asked.
"Yes."
"Then, we must be quiet once we become invisible."
"We?"
"Yes, we! We're in this together, now, aren't we?"
"From this point on, I guess we are."
I taught Julian the chant. It didn't take very long. We spent the rest of the afternoon practicing, and Julian was pleased I was including him in my plans.
As I walked out the door, he grabbed my hand.
"You know you can always count on me any time for any reason, don't you?"
"I do."
✽✽✽
When I got home, I met with Beau and, afterwards, we had dinner. Now that I realized Suzanne possessed Maman, I dreaded spending time with her and Auntie. So, I spent more time with Beau. Uncle Phonse and Suzanne were becoming closer. Dinners usually ended with Auntie storming out because of something either may have said or done.
Auntie's fears about Maman and Uncle becoming closer were real because Maman was Suzanne, and he would always love her even if she dwelled in another's body. She not only knew how to keep him close to her, she also knew how to push Auntie over the edge. She was clever and conniving. She might have been a kind person once, but her anger and hatred consumed her. It drove her to kill the person Uncle Phonse loved even more than he loved her. She was no longer the sweet and kind person he once loved. I prayed her preoccupation with Uncle and Auntie would delay her plans to harm to Maman.
After dinner, Beau and Auntie adjourned to the small parlor, as was their custom. This was my chance to use my invisibility to snoop on them. I followed Felicie to the kitchen on the pretense of helping her clean the table. This is where I intended to become invisible.
"Felicie, whatever happens in the next few minutes, keep it to yourself. Close your eyes."
"What you up to now? I don't want no trouble from Auntie."
"There won't be any trouble. Just close your eyes and cover your ears for a minute."
As soon as I became invisible she opened her eyes. Not seeing me spooked her.
"Where you at?" she said as she stretched out her arms, trying to touch me.
"Don't scream or anything! You can't see me, but I'm still here. I can see you," I whispered.
"Oh, my Lawd. What'd you do that for?" Then, she thought better of asking the question. "Never mind, I don't wanna know."
"Good. I don't have time to tell you anyway. Just forget what just happened."
"You forgotten already."
I headed for the parlor but faced a major dilemma. They had shut the door. If I opened it, they would see the door open or hear the doorknob turning even though they didn't see me. That would unnerve them. I didn't want to chance it. I reached out my hand, hoping it would pass through the door. It didn't. That meant I'd have to be in the parlor before they came in.
I practiced making myself invisible and snooped on Suzanne over the next few days. She normally returned to Maman's room right after breakfast. On days that I spied on her, I left the table before she did, made myself invisible, and waited for her in her room. After a few days of spying, Auntie paid her a visit.
"I want you to leave, Aimee."
"Leave? Why? Wherever would I go?" Suzanne taunted.
"I don't care. Take Gabbie and go back to Buras."
"What have I done to become so unwelcome?"
"You let Brigitte die. That's what you did. You wouldn't raise a finger to save her. Now, you're going after my husband."
"Don't be ridiculous, Lucinda. You can't believe I would do anything to harm Brigitte. I didn't want her to die. What's more, I'm not going after Phonse. I haven't gotten over the death of Gus yet. I may never get over him."
"OH! So you remember you had a husband who lost his life trying to save you?"
"How could I ever forget? Phonse took care of me and Gabbie because of his friendship with Gus. He's like a brother to me."
"Do you take me for a fool? Do you think I'm crazy? Do you think I'm blind?" She screamed louder with each question.
Suzanne taunted her. "You? Crazy?" She laughed at her.
"I want you and Gabbie to leave my house. Now. I'll give you money to start over in Buras, if that's where you want to go."
"Buras? I can't return to a place haunted by so many memories. No, I will stay here."
"This is my house! And I want you out." Auntie's face turned purple.
Suzanne got out of her chair, put one hand on her hip, and pointed at Auntie.
"You forget, my dear sister, Popá left me half of this house so I would always have home. He lived to regret the way he treated me and my family. As for money, half of all his business interests are mine, too. Have you forgotten that?"
"No, I haven't. And I haven't forgotten that you didn't want any of it. You rejected your inheritance because you and Gus were too proud to accept it. Now, you want his money? You'll have to go through me to get a penny of it! That's why I'm offering you money, a lot of money, to go away."
"Lucinda, I never renounced my inheritance. I refused it because Gus wanted to be his own man, and I loved that about him. But I never renounced Popá's Gift."
Auntie sat down.
"Do you remember the letter I got from Popá's lawyer right after he died?"
"He wanted to make peace with you before he died."
"That's true. What you don't know is the way he made peace. He amended his will, giving me the right to claim my portion of any inheritance during my lifetime."
"That won't hold up in court if that's what you're planning to do." Lucinda bluffed Suzanne.
"I've already checked with Popá's attorneys, and he said nothing has changed. Popá put my share of the inheritance in a trust. And, since I own half of the house, I have every right to live here. That's what I plan to do."
Auntie got up from the chair, beside herself with anger and hatred.
"I don't care about the money. You can have half of the profits from the business. But, I want the house. I will pay you for your half just so you leave. Hell, I'll pay more than that if I must. You can buy any house you want in all New Orleans."
"Just to make myself clear, my dear, I have no intention of leaving. If you don't want to be around me, you leave. It's you who needs a new beginning. The memories in this house are driving you mad."
Auntie slapped Suzanne and ran out of the room crying.
Suzanne laughed.
✽✽✽
The next afternoon, I met Julian at the park to fill him in on my spying activities. I also hoped Stefan had sent more letters. He hadn't. When Julian saw my disappointment, he told me how busy the end of a term was. He was right.
"Julian, there's a way we can find out if Auntie had anything to do with your Maman's death."
"How?"
"Auntie's losing her grip on reality. She suspects everyone of plotting against her. If you come to dinner, seeing you might remind her of what she did, especially if we bring up your Maman in the conversation. She might become totally unhinged."
"Unhinged enough to confess something?"
"Not intentionally, but she'll give herself away somehow. Come on a day when Beau is there. If anyone knows anything about it, he would. She might implicate herself if she's off balance."
"That might work," he said.
"If it doesn’t, we can make her hear voices."
"How?"
"Well, suppose she hears your voice accusing her of your Maman's murder. And suppose she hears you but does not see you? That might push her to say something."
"But, if Beau's there, won't he hear my voice too?"
"Not if you whisper it in her ear. It could work."
"It just might." Julian responded. "You're more devious than I ever imagined, Gabbie."
"Yes, I am. With good reason."
"I agree."
"Which do you want to try first?" Julian asked.
"We should snoop on her and Beau, first. Can you come to dinner on Friday? Beau always has Friday supper with us."
"OK."
"In the meantime, think of some ways you can bring up your Maman in the conversation."
"That'll be easy."
✽✽✽
Auntie, Suzanne, and Maman preoccupied my thoughts. But I hadn't forgotten about Emilie. I hadn't made amends, and I didn't know how. I halfway expected to hear from her. We had made a good start at a friendship during the ball. Except for the fact I ruined it for her, and she lost Stefan. Even so, I stood by her side when her friends deserted her, but she never invited me for a visit.
In ordinary circumstances, I would have invited her for a visit. But with Auntie's unpredictable behavior, I couldn't take a chance. I thought about ways to undo the harm I had caused, like a forgetting spell. But I'd have to make everyone at the ball forget. Too complicated for my current skill level. I had to go back to the exact moment I cast the spell and not cast it. That sounded possible, but it had a colossal risk. Undoing it might jeopardize my relationship with Stefan. He might still like her. But I had to take that chance.
Stefan and I had exchanged several letters. I tried to be entertaining by sharing my running commentary on what was going on in the house. In his letters, he shared what life at the academy was like. Those first letters were awkward. We both took a careful, deliberate approach. Neither of us was willing to risk our hearts, I guess. I wanted him to know I admired him, but I didn't tell him I loved him. I wanted him to say it first.
As we became more comfortable, the awkwardness disappeared from our writing, and romance took its place. He told me how much he missed me, how much he admired me, how much he longed to be with me. I let him know I felt the same. I even sprinkled my letters with some of Maman's perfume. We both were looking forward to his homecoming. I hoped we would be ready to profess our love for each other by then.