by Gerri Hill
“Deb?”
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“No. We’re not really that close with Deb. Anyway, if we invited her, where would it stop? We’d just have the whole softball team out here.”
“But Kelly Sambino?” Jo asked again.
“We like her, Jo.”
“She suggested the meal tonight,” Janis added, when she stuck her head out of the kitchen.
“It’s your birthday. Why are you cooking?” Jo asked her.
“It’s lasagna. Betsy wouldn’t know where to start.”
“You know very well I can’t cook,” Betsy reminded Jo.
She took the forks out of her hand and pushed her toward the kitchen. “You’re making me nervous. Go pour the wine or something.”
“I just wish you’d told me she was going to be here.”
“Jo, she’s not going to bother you. I told her to bring a date,” Betsy said.
“A date?”
“Yes. You could have brought someone too, you know.”
Jo glared at her for a second, then went in search of the wine. Great! Not only was she going to spend the evening with Kelly, she was going to spend the evening with Kelly’s date.
“I hope you have enough wine,” Jo said as she pulled the first cork out.
Janis gave her shoulder a squeeze. “We have enough wine. You can have a whole bottle to yourself.”
Jo glared at her, too.
Thankfully, Kerry and Shea arrived first, and Jo was spared seeing Kelly and her mystery date. And why did she even care? She had told Kelly that she would not go out with her, and she meant it. Emotionally, Kelly meant nothing to her. You could hardly say they were even friends. And if she had a date tonight, that was just fine with Jo. Maybe Kelly would quit pestering her about going out.
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“Good to see you again, Jo,” Shea told her.
“You, too. I guess we only run into each other at softball games.”
Kerry grasped her shoulder tightly and Jo leaned away from the larger woman.
“We’re having a backyard party next Saturday,” Kerry said. “We’d like you to come. We’re going to set up the volleyball net and we’ll have barbecue and beer, of course.”
“End of summer party,” Shea added.
“Sounds like fun,” Jo said. “Thanks.”
Betsy left to answer the door while Jo silently prayed it was Kay knocking. She heard Kelly’s husky laugh before she saw her, and Jo cursed her luck. Everyone was all smiles as they said hello to Kelly and. . . Lucy.
“Jo, isn’t it?” Lucy asked as they shook hands.
“Yes,” Jo said between gritted teeth. “Wine’s in the kitchen. Let me get you a glass.”
“No. I’ll get us one.”
Jo turned on Kelly as soon as Lucy was out of sight.
“No trouble getting a date?” she asked sweetly.
“Oh, gosh no,” Kelly said. “Not with my reputation.”
Jo glared at her as she followed Lucy into the kitchen.
When Kay finally arrived, Jo was hardly in the mood to be civil.
“Have you met Toni?” Kay asked her.
“At the bar, yes.” Jo shook her hand, again amazed at how young she looked. Kay had ended a relationship with a much older woman only months before Nancy skipped town. Since then, Kay rarely dated anyone older than thirty.
“Are you alone?” Kay asked.
“Of course,” Jo said automatically. “Why muddle things up with a date?”
“Toni’s got a roommate,” Kay offered. “I think you would hit it off.”
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“A blind date? Be serious.”
“She’s a high school teacher,” Toni chimed in.
“Great personality, too,” Kay added.
Jo looked at Kay with raised eyebrows. “I appreciate your concern, but no,” she said pointedly. She had enough trouble.
“Oh, Kelly and Lucy are here. Good,” Kay said.
Good? Jo followed her gaze as Kelly and Lucy went with Betsy out to the deck. Through the double doors, she watched them talking, but turned away before Kelly caught her. It was as if Kelly could feel Jo’s eyes on her, and Kelly had turned to search for her.
This has got to stop, Jo told herself. She purposefully turned her back to Kelly and listened as the others carried on a conversation without her. Once again, she was the fifth wheel, the only one without a date. The only one alone.
She knew immediately when Kelly came back into the room, she could feel her presence without turning around.
“I told Janis this wouldn’t be a big deal, but I think we should sing,” Betsy said and they laughed.
“Oh, wait,” Jo said, handing her glass to Kay. “I almost forgot the cake.”
“Cake?” Janis called. “You promised no cake, Johanna Marshall!”
Jo came back in with a cake disguised as two very large breasts. The groan from Janis was drowned out by everyone else’s laughter when they read the greeting. “40. Eat ‘em and weep!”
“Jo? How could you?” Janis demanded.
“Betsy made me,” she laughed.
“Me?” Betsy cried with mock indignation.
“Good one, Jo,” Kay said. “Let’s light them.”
They gathered around Janis and her breasts, and Jo held a match to the candles in each nipple.
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“I’ll get you for this, Jo!” Janis warned.
They burst into an off-key version of “Happy Birthday”
and Janis laughed delightfully during the entire song.
“Don’t give up your day jobs,” she teased before blowing out the two candles. She punched Jo playfully on the arm, then grabbed her for a quick hug. “Thank you,” she whispered.
Jo grinned, then went in search of more wine. She figured she would have a much easier time getting through the evening if she were drinking.
To her dismay, she was seated directly across from Kelly and Lucy, and she was forced to watch them during the entire meal. She tried to be discreet, but after her fourth glass of wine, she was staring. And to Kelly’s credit, she never gave any indication that she and Lucy were anything other than friends. Lucy, however, took every possible opportunity to touch Kelly. When they spoke, Lucy leaned close, practically rubbing her breasts on Kelly’s arm. Jo was disgusted!
She picked at her food, having to force down every bite, while trying to make polite conversation with Kay on her right and Shea on her left, but she found her eyes were always drawn to the couple across from her.
After cake, everyone started taking their leave, and Jo helped Betsy clear the table.
“One good thing about dinner parties,” Betsy said,
“They don’t last all night.”
Ain’t it the truth, Jo silently agreed.
“Oh, that was fun,” Janis exclaimed, as she climbed on a barstool and watched Betsy and Jo clean up.
“I’m glad you liked it, honey,” Betsy said.
“The cake was evil,” she said and Jo laughed. “I’ll get you back,” she warned again.
“You’ll forget all about it by the time I’m forty.”
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“Don’t count on it!”
“Kelly was quiet tonight,” Betsy observed.
“Yes, she was,” Janis agreed.
Jo didn’t comment. She and Kelly had not spoken, and the few times their eyes had met, it was almost as if they were strangers.
“I wonder if she and Lucy are seriously dating?” Betsy asked.
“I can’t see it,” Janis said. “Lucy just doesn’t seem her type.”
And what is her type? Jo wondered.
“Jo?”
Jo looked up, startled.
“You’re quiet, too,” Janis stated.
“Am I?” Jo hurried into the kitchen with her load of plates. “I’m just tired, I guess.” It was an excuse that worked no matter what, and she didn’t hesitate to use it now.
“We can get the rest, Jo. Don’t worry about it,” Betsy said fro
m behind her.
“I know. I’m leaving.” Then she grinned. “I’m sure you have a big night planned.”
“Oh? Do we?” Janis asked innocently, and Betsy blushed.
Jo hugged both of them, and kissed Betsy on the cheek as she left. “Behave tonight,” she teased. “You know Janis is getting old.”
“I heard that!” Janis called after her.
Jo’s smile vanished as soon as her car door slammed and the emptiness surrounded her. She didn’t want to feel this way, and she cursed the day that Kelly Sambino came into her life. Her attraction to Kelly was undeniable, but she certainly didn’t want it. She was getting along perfectly fine without her, thank you. Sure, she had been lonely sometimes. But never like this.
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She imagined kissing Kelly, the taste of wine on Kelly’s tongue, the feel of smooth skin beneath her fingertips. She shuddered. But it was too late. She drove home in a daze as Kelly came to her again and again, lips and tongue teasing her, tantalizing her. She offered her breast to Kelly, and soon a warm mouth closed over her. Jo moaned, the sound echoing in the quiet car, and she pushed her thoughts away.
But later, as she lay in her empty bed, she welcomed the images, and her eyes slid shut when Kelly’s mouth came to her. She wanted to feel Kelly inside her. She wanted her fingers deep inside Kelly. She groaned and rolled over, tasting Kelly’s skin beneath her mouth, feeling Kelly’s nipples swell against her tongue.
She imagined it was Kelly’s hand touching her now, caressing her breasts.
“Oh,” she breathed when her fingers felt her own wetness. Her mouth opened, waiting for Kelly’s kiss as her fingers moved, stroking herself, bringing herself closer to release.
It was Kelly’s mouth on her, her tongue sliding into her, and finally her hips rose once, hard against her hand, and she turned her face into the pillow, stifling her scream.
When her breathing slowed to normal, Jo opened her eyes, half expecting Kelly to be there, watching her. But she was still alone. Still lonely.
Kelly was, no doubt, with Lucy.
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Chapter Fifteen
Jo spent a lonely Sunday afternoon curled in the corner of her sofa, her thoughts jumping from the book in her lap to the football game on TV and finally to Kelly. She tried desperately to not think about last night. . . Kelly with Lucy.
Harry had some fishing buddies over so Jo had politely taken her leave after their earlier-than-usual brunch. She was actually looking forward to Monday. Maybe Kelly would forget about their conversation Friday and come into her office to talk. Maybe Jo could forget about the birthday party. She had been rude to Kelly, and really should apolo-gize. But she never got the chance. Jo did not see Kelly all week.
The following Saturday, Jo decided to accept Kerry and Shea's invitation to their end of summer barbecue. They had 115
insisted she come, or so Betsy said. Jo didn't really know them, but they were friends of Janis's. They had been a couple for fourteen years, and Janis had known them for six of those years. Of course, Jo knew she was only going in hopes of seeing Kelly. At least she could be honest with herself about that.
They lived in an old house in the Hyde Park area, with a huge backyard and a stone patio. A keg of beer was waiting, a barbecue pit was smoking, and the smell of smoking brisket assailed her when she walked up. A volleyball net was strung across the yard, and Betsy and Shea were serving to each other while the others argued over choosing sides. The entire softball team was supposed to be there. Johanna scanned the familiar faces, looking for Kelly.
Kelly finally showed, with Lucy in tow. Shocked, Jo stared at them, then quickly look away and finished filling her cup at the keg. Maybe they really were dating. It was obvious they had come together. Jo was knocked off balance by the pang of jealousy that hit her.
When sides were drawn for volleyball, Jo was thankful that she, Kelly and Lucy were on opposing teams. She played horribly, anyway. She never claimed to be an athlete, and she was, by far, the worst one there, what with all the softball players. To add to her disgust, Lucy turned out to be a fantastic jumper. Whenever she was on the front line, they scored, her spike invariably sailing between two players and smashing to the ground. Once, when Jo was playing opposite her, Lucy spiked the ball directly into Jo's face. Only by the grace of God did it not knock her out cold!
Jo went to the keg and drank two full cups of beer before she felt recovered. Thankfully, someone else showed up who took her place in the game.
She sat on the sideline with Janis, who refused to play.
They watched as the others laughed and argued about out-116
of-bounds calls while Jo tried to keep her eyes off Kelly. But she couldn't and she finally stopped trying. There were more trips to the keg, spurred by the blatant attention Kelly was giving to Lucy. By the time the games were over and everyone else settled down in lawn chairs, Jo was well on her way to getting drunk.
"I've never seen you drink so much," Betsy said.
"Yeah, well, maybe I'm due a good hangover."
"At this rate, you won't be disappointed," she retorted.
"Stop. Please," Jo said.
"Okay. But maybe you need to think about why you're doing this."
Jo just stared at her and said nothing until Betsy shrugged and walked away.
Deb came and sat next to her, and Jo was more attentive than she should have been, but at least someone found her interesting. During dinner, Jo and Deb sat next to each other, and she nodded while Deb talked but she didn't really hear. She was too busy watching Kelly and Lucy sitting close together, talking quietly.
“Jo?”
Jo blinked several times, and brought her attention back to Deb.
“Sorry. What?”
“I said we never made our movie date. If you’re that busy during the week, why don’t we try for Friday or Saturday?”
Jo stared at Deb, who was clearly expecting a response.
Her mind would not cooperate and no excuse miraculously came to her. Instead, she nodded weakly.
“Okay.”
“Great! I’ll call you later in the week and we’ll plan it.
Maybe we can have dinner, too.” Deb was obviously thrilled and Jo cursed herself for being weak. She should just tell 117
Deb the truth, that she didn’t want to go out with her. But she was getting very good at lying. An excuse would come later.
After the plates had been collected and everything cleaned up, they all settled again on the patio and Kerry put on soft music. Jo couldn't stand it. She walked slowly over to the keg to get another beer. She was surprised when Kelly walked up behind her.
"Are you trying to drink enough to pass out or what?"
she asked.
Jo shot her an angry look. "Mind your own damn business."
Kelly ignored her remark and glanced at Deb. "I didn't realize that you and Deb were on such friendly terms."
Jo looked over at Lucy, then back at Kelly. "Yeah, well, same goes for you and Lucy."
"Hey, I figured I better start living up to my reputation,"
she shot back.
"Oh, and you've just now started?" Jo asked sarcastically.
"Actually, no, we've gone out a few times before."
Jo stared at her, her heart squeezing in her chest. "You have?" she whispered.
"Yes. She's fun to be around and she seems to like me as a person. She doesn't seem to believe my terrible reputation."
Jo felt as if she'd just been slapped. She suddenly felt like crying. "Have you slept with her?" she asked, so softly Kelly almost didn't hear.
She laughed harshly. "Why should you care?"
Jo raised her eyes, feeling tears stinging them. "I care,"
she whispered.
Kelly saw her tears and cursed. She looked down, then ran a hand through her hair. "God, what do you think I am?"
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She shook her head, took the beer from Jo, set it down and led her inside the house
where they could be alone.
"I haven't slept with her. I know you won’t believe this, but I haven't been with anyone since that night in June," she said.
"You haven't?” Jo stared at her, then squeezed her eyes shut. She shouldn’t care one way or the other. "I'm sorry.
It's not any of my business what you do."
"No. It's not. I tried to make it your business, but you wouldn't let me."
"I know," she said quietly.
"What do you want from me?" Kelly asked softly.
"I want you to come by my office and ask me to lunch."
"So you can turn me down?"
Jo nodded.
Kelly smiled.
Jo felt like crying again.
"You've had too much to drink," Kelly said gently.
"It's your fault. I couldn't stand watching you with her.
Not last Saturday. Not tonight."
"Are you jealous?"
Jo nodded. "But I have no right to be."
Kelly watched her for a long moment. "How are you getting home?"
"Betsy and Janis."
"Let me take you home," Kelly suggested.
Jo laughed. "I thought you were on a date."
"Lucy can find a ride home," she said. “Maybe with Deb.”
"You're incorrigible," Jo said, shaking her head.
"It's not Lucy I want," Kelly said softly.
"Have you kissed her?" Jo asked, searching Kelly's face.
"You have, haven't you?"
"Jo. . . .”
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"Did you?" she whispered.
"Yes."
Jo was filled with such jealousy that it scared her. The thought of Kelly kissing someone else gripped painfully at her heart.
Kelly gathered her in her arms, and Jo wrapped her own around Kelly’s waist, laying her head on her shoulder.
"So much for your reputation," Jo murmured.
"Goddamn it, Jo. It's not Lucy I want," she said again.
Jo pulled out of her arms. "But she wants you."
"And you don't," Kelly said.
Jo turned her back to Kelly and took a deep breath. "I do want you," she whispered.
"Jo?"
She turned back around and met Kelly's eyes. "I do want you," she repeated.
She no longer cared that she would hate herself in the morning. She no longer cared that Kelly was not the one for her. She wanted to make love with her again, and she could no longer deny herself that.