The Grey Woman: You never know who's watching

by M J Hardy

  I wander around in awe until I remember why I’m here, so I head towards the offices of the head of human resources where my task begins.

  Harriet Masters is the head of HR and will be the woman responsible for selecting the final applicants. The first thing I do is sift through her waste paper bin to see if I can find anything to help me. Aside from the usual rubbish they throw away, I see her scribbles on white sheets of paper and fold them up to be studied later at home. Quickly, I grab a single sheet of paper and head across to her ink blotter and grabbing a pencil shade over the blotter revealing the indentations below. Once again, I fold up the paper and place it in my pocket.

  Grabbing my polish and duster, I clean her desk, paying particular attention to the drawer fronts. Sliding each one of them open, I search for any notebooks or items that may be home to passwords or keys to the filing cabinets.

  Quickly, I check her in-tray and see several unopened letters and as I turn my attention to the filing cabinet, I look around furtively before opening the top drawer and searching for the folder I am sure is here.

  It doesn’t take long and I soon find what I want. A folder marked Mr Landon’s pa - applicants.

  Quickly, I whip out my phone and take a photograph of every sheet of paper and then make sure I place them back where I found them.

  Then I quickly tidy the office, making sure to do my job well because I will need further access to this floor.

  As I move from office to office, I conduct the same search. It will pay me to know every detail of what goes on here and outside of the computer files that will remain private, I need to know about the people who work here.

  By the time I reach the office of the one who interests me the most, time has moved on and I’m running late. Quickly, I head inside and look around in awe and disbelief at the offices of the man in charge.

  Every bit as impressive as the others, but a hundred times more so. This room is huge and could be mistaken as the seat of power because it is just as I imagine the oval office or 10 Downing Street to be.

  All around me is wealth, from the paintings on the wall, to the cut-glass decanters and matching glasses set beside a small off-licence of spirits. A comfortable couch sits to one side in front of a giant television screen. The window is panoramic and if it wasn’t dark, I guess I would see the whole of London spread out beneath me. My heart beats faster as I look at the silver photos staring at me from the highly polished desk. Moving across, I see the man himself looking out at me with his arm slung around the shoulders of an obvious supermodel. Standing before them are two gorgeous little girls who look to be around 5 or 6 and are the spitting image of their glamourous mother.

  I can’t drag my eyes from the man I aspire to work for. I heard he was attractive, but this man is handsome. So handsome, from his dark slick hair and electric blue eyes, that are flashing as he smiles for the camera. He appears lithe and athletic, and his body strains against the polo shirt he is wearing tucked into beige chinos. His clothes look expensive and the surroundings are the grandest I have ever seen. His wife is, as I would expect, beautiful with a femininity that only the rich wear well. She is manicured and perfection personified, and her clothes wouldn’t look out of place in a magazine spread in Vogue. I’m guessing their children go to private school and no doubt have a stable of ponies. This world they inhabit is intoxicating, and I want it more than life itself. This photograph, these offices, have fuelled my resolve. I must get this job; my life depends on it.

  I am so engrossed in what I see before me, I am surprised to hear, “There you are. I’ll take that thanks you owe me now.”

  7

  “What?”

  I take a step back because I wasn’t expecting this. Declan has this look in his eye I don’t care for, and I’m suddenly extremely aware of my vulnerable position.

  He saunters into the office and closes the door softly, and my heart leaps as he turns the lock and removes his jacket.

  “I’ve been watching you.”

  “Excuse me.”

  My voice sounds weak and feeble and my legs are trembling, threatening to give out on me at any time.

  He removes his tie and says darkly, “On the monitor. I’ve watched you move from room to room looking at things you shouldn’t. What’s your story, beautiful lady?”

  My head roars and I berate myself for being so incredibly careless. Of course, the CCTV - the cameras. It’s what they’re there for. To record and ensure the safety of everyone inside. How could I be so stupid?

  He smiles creepily and grunts, “I said, I’ll take that thanks now.”

  Quickly, I try to think of a way out of this situation and decide to play dumb. “Um... thanks.”

  I move to the other side of the desk and he laughs, a low hollow sound that has no humour in it. “I want you to demonstrate how thankful you are. You see, as I see it, you have two choices. Do what I say and I’ll keep your little secret, or you can refuse me and you’ll never step foot inside this building again. Your choice, darlin’, now what’s it to be?”

  He grins, sure that he has this all worked out and from where he’s standing, he has.

  “What do you want?”

  He smirks. “Isn’t it obvious?”

  “No.”

  He laughs softly. “It’s ok, darlin’, I don’t want to hurt you. Just fool around a little like Lisa does. She knows how to keep a man on side and you’ll find the rewards are great. Take you, for instance.”

  “Me?”

  “Your little search and steal you got going on there. I’m guessing you are looking for something and it’s not above board. To be honest, I couldn’t care less what it is, each to their own, but you see, if I keep your secret, you’ve got to reward me somehow. If you don’t, I’ll report you for snooping and your ass will be out of here quicker than you can shout rape.”

  “Rape.” I feel sick to my stomach as he unzips his trousers and takes his penis in his hands. “I only want you to give me a blow job. A small price to pay for my silence, wouldn’t you say?”

  I feel sick and dirty and backed into a corner, and I’m not sure what I can do about this. The last thing I want is to be anywhere near the vile creature before me, and I feel the bile rising in my throat. Playing for time, I say softly, “I’ll need a minute.”

  I see the excitement flash in his eyes as he strokes himself, groaning with anticipation. Spying a paperweight on the desk, I seize my chance and say huskily, “Go and lie on the couch, you’ll be more comfortable there.”

  He licks his lips and growls. “Fuck, baby, you know how to turn a man on. Don’t be long, I’ve only got ten minutes before I have to check in.”

  Feeling light headed, I just nod and smile sexily, “I’ll be quick.”

  As he makes towards the couch, I back up to the wall and as I do so, drive the paperweight through the glass surrounding the fire alarm. As it shatters, the loud bell that starts ringing drowns out the sound and Declan jumps up shouting, “What the fuck?”

  Frantically, he fastens his trousers and races for the door, shouting, “I need to get back to my desk and coordinate this. What the fuck is going on?”

  I stifle a laugh as he runs wildly from the office, still oblivious to the fact it was me who set the alarm off in the first place.

  However, my laughter soon fades as I realise what a hole I’m now in. Declan knows. He knows I’m up to something and now has a hold over me that he’s unlikely to relinquish. I’m not stupid and know that as soon as he gets over this latest hurdle, he’ll be back to claim his revenge and it won’t be pretty. No, I need to deal with the problem and I know just know how.

  Quickly, I finish up before the fire officers come in search of the cause of the alarm and make my way downstairs. I have some homework to occupy my time and feel quite excited about what lies ahead.

  As I reach my locker, I see Becky changing out of her overalls and smile. “How are you getting on?”

  She shrugs and says in a tired voi
ce. “It’s ok I guess, but I never thought it would be so boring.”

  Laughing to myself, I nod sympathetically. “It can be. However, like most jobs, it’s what you make it.”

  Thinking of all the information I’ve gathered; I smile to myself. Yes, this job is way more interesting than it is on face value because it gives me the cloak of invisibility to get what I want.

  Grateful for the fact that Ronnie is working, after my supper I spread out the paperwork I took from Crossline and study the photographs I took on my phone. It makes for interesting reading. It appears they have six applicants of any worth for the job. Three internal ones and three from agencies they use. Harriet has discounted two of them and I read with interest the notes she’s scribbled on post-it notes attached to the relevant application. One doesn’t have the relevant experience which is a problem for me and one had bad references, also a problem for me. The four that remain are good candidates and I see that Ally and Sarah appear to be the front runners.

  As I study their applications, I take notes of all the points they’ve raised that are good and make an outline of their layout. Then I reach for my laptop and type my own resume and covering letter, making sure to include everything they have and more. When it comes to experience, I amplify my assets and like all works of fiction, I make it bigger, bolder and almost unbelievable. I’m banking on her not actually reading a word I have written, but at least it’s a small piece of cover should I need it.

  It appears that the closing date is tomorrow and interviews are scheduled for early next week, so I have a little time at least. Making sure to email my application to the generic email provided, I hold my breath as I press send. There – no going back and my heart beats with an excitement that it hasn’t done for quite some time now.

  Can I really pull this off? If I do, the riches are worth the deception. If I don’t, the worst thing that could happen is I never hear back from them. Thinking of a possible interview gives me anxiety because I’m pretty sure they will see through me in an instant. Let’s just hope it doesn’t get that far.

  8

  The next day I almost can’t concentrate on my work at Barrington’s. Every time someone comes in from Crossline, I listen for any news that could help me, but today is obviously a slow news day and I feel increasingly frustrated as the day goes on. I see both Ally and Sarah and size up my competition and find myself lacking in every department.

  Luckily, the day is routine and nothing gets in my way as I head to Crossline for my evening shift. Today I have something I need to do and it will take a miracle to pull this one off.

  I breathe a sigh of relief as I see Lisa heading my way as I change and she pulls a face.

  “Ugh, I can’t believe I’m back here already. You know, having that day off really made me think.”

  “What about?”

  “This - my life. You know, Emma, I’m not like you - I want more. I mean, it’s ok for you, you have a husband and a home and have it all worked out. I’m still young with it all still to play for and this isn’t how I imagined my life to pan out.”

  Far from feeling annoyed at her comments, I just smile. “What are you thinking?”

  “Well…” She grabs her overalls and says with some excitement. “I’ve applied to work in one of the big stores in Oxford Street. My cousin works there and can’t speak highly enough about it. I think I stand a good chance, so if I’m suddenly gone one evening, you’ll know I was successful.”

  She busies herself with her preparations and I smile to myself. I hope she gets what she wants because nobody should settle for second best, no matter how old they are. Maybe the wind of change has blown through both our lives and this time next year, we will be on a very different path.

  It’s with some trepidation that I head off to grab my trolley and start my shift. Now Lisa’s back she will clean the executive offices, which makes things more difficult. I try not to look at Declan as I make my way towards the elevators and yet I can see his reflection in the shiny steel walls and my hearts settles as I see him deep in flirtatious conversation with Lisa. She is laughing and doesn’t appear to harbour the same disgust that I have for him, and I feel a frisson of excitement as I think that my plan might just work.

  I consult my watch and note that I have approximately two hours, so I work as if I’m possessed. I clean those offices like a robot and hardly stop to draw breath. Then, just before seven thirty, I head back downstairs and my heart lifts as I see the front desk empty where Declan usually sits. I head across and make a big show of cleaning the surrounding area and steal a look at the monitors. Quickly, I flick them to the executive suite and see Declan and Lisa in Mr Landon’s office. By the looks of it, they’ve just met up because I watch him close the door and lock it as she moves towards the couch. Propping my phone in front of the monitor, I set it to record, making sure to pause the CCTV in the executive offices, silently thanking my father for all those boring Saturdays spent helping him at work when he did this very job at the local department store. Who knew I would need that lesson for this purpose in my future?

  Then I head to the elevator leading to the executive offices. My heart thumps madly as I will the lift to travel faster as it heads toward the office I need.

  It doesn’t take long and I don’t waste any time and head toward Harriet’s office, sure that I’m not being recorded this time and carefully open the door.

  Quickly, I grab the post-it notes I carefully copied and place one on Sarah’s application in my best imitation of Harriet’s writing. If I feel bad about sabotaging her chances, it soon passes as I place my own application in the filing cabinet, with the post-it note that was once on her application now firmly on mine. My heart thumps as I realise what a chance I’m taking because I am relying on Harriet delegating the paperwork to her assistant who will follow her instructions to the letter.

  As I quickly head downstairs, I pass Mr Landon’s office and shiver as I think of what goes on in there at night. I wonder if he knows; he soon will if I get my chance?

  By the time I reach the front desk, it has been all of ten minutes and I feel relieved when I grab my phone to see Declan pulling up his trousers and Lisa hastily rearranging her clothes. Perfect, job done. Just the insurance I need should he come looking for me.

  Making sure to stow my trolley, I think about the next stage of my plan. This one will be riskier, but the adrenalin now shooting through my body makes it far more exciting than scary. Once again, I don’t have long to prepare, so without waiting a minute longer, I head home for the night.

  The next morning, for the first time since I started working there, I call in sick. I feel a little bad because it does leave them in the lurch, but that can’t be helped. I need the day to execute my plan and I don’t have long.

  Taking extra care with my appearance, I shower, style my hair and apply the make-up that totally transforms me into one of them. The people I aspire to be like in every way possible.

  Then I gather my folder and head towards the town, intent on picking up a smart suit to make me look the part in every way.

  I know what I’m planning is risky to the extreme. For all I know, Mr Landon will be angry and have me thrown out onto the street where I belong. However, I have to try because there is no doubt in my mind, I won’t get this job through the normal channels, so I polish my resolve and straighten my back as I set off to battle.

  Two hours later and my own mother wouldn’t recognise me. I certainly look the part and on face value I am every bit as competent as the other applicants. However, I lack the basic experience needed for this position, which theoretically should dismiss me out of hand. However, I can’t let a minor detail like that get in my way, so I head to the coffee shop on the other side of Crossline Wealth Management and do what my own customers do every day – I order a coffee to go.

  However, this coffee is not for me and I laugh as it strikes me that coffee may well be part of my success. Fingers crossed, anyway.

&nbs
p; As I walk the short distance to Crossline, I hold my security pass gingerly in my pocket and take a deep breath. I can do this; it just takes courage and lot of bravado.

  As I reach the reception, I am pleased to see that Declan isn’t on the day shift. I’m not sure why I thought he would be, but knowing my luck he swapped with someone. However, the man that sits in his chair is a different one and doesn’t give me a second look as I march past him with my lanyard swinging confidently as I walk. I don’t stop to make conversation, or eye contact for that matter, and just stride towards the executive elevators as if I have every right to.

  Nervously, I wait for the lift and try to control my beating heart. I can do this; I just know I can and as the lift arrives, I swallow hard and step inside along with five other people.

  If I thought they may challenge me, I was mistaken because these people don’t give me a second look. They stare at the ceiling, the walls, or the ground, and fumble with their phones with an air of boredom I can’t understand. This is the dream – surely. Why wouldn’t they be beaming around and congratulating themselves on making it? I’ll never understand people. Do they realise just how lucky they are?

  The lift arrives at its destination and I join the crowd of people streaming down the hall. As I walk, I tell myself I have every right to be here and nothing will stand in my way. In no time I reach the executive suite of offices that Julian Landon occupies and I slow for just a fraction of a second. What was I thinking?

  Now I’m here, my resolve is in danger of crumbling. Am I really that naïve to think Claire will let me just breeze into Mr Landon’s office without an appointment? I can see her head bowed to her computer as she concentrates on her work and the nerves almost make me change my mind and I step inside an empty room and take a deep breath.

  Now I’m here, I’m not so sure this was such a good idea. The trouble is, my application may not pass scrutiny, and if Harriet Masters is anything to go by, I’m almost sure of it. Thinking of Ronnie and the direction my life is heading makes my resolve harden. I’m better than that. I deserve more. I’m not ready to give up work and be a mother before I’ve even tried to see if I’ve got what it takes.