by Coralee June
Alessandro picked me up and dragged me away from Gavriel's plane, which was now engulfed in flames. Farther we went. I screamed in pain. My head was swimming in confusion. A second blast made the ground shake. Flying debris zoomed past us. A small shard of metal grazed my cheek. Another was embedded in my arm. That ringing sound was constant. Never-ending. Deafening. Burning burning burning.
My brain and mouth were on delay. I wanted to scream. Ringing. My ears played a constant loop, the high-pitched whine making me want to puke. “Grace!” Alessandro yelled, but I couldn’t process it. The heat coated my skin. Groaning, explosive metal shouted at us, but I could barely hear its pain.
Ringing.
I felt blood dripping down my cheek. My eyes fluttered shut.
Ringing.
I clenched my teeth so hard I feared they’d crack. My hair whipped around my face, clinging to the cuts in my skin.
Ringing.
I collapsed with the strange woman's words replaying in my mind.
The Ringleaders send their highest regards...
Chapter Six
Nix
One of the first things my mother ever told me was not to believe everything you think. The mind can be such a fickle beast. I prided myself on controlling every aspect of my life. I was a true dominant, barreling into life with an iron fist and determined attitude. But my brain was one organ I couldn't command. It taunted me. It kept rolling one phrase on repeat, over and over and over again.
They're dead.
Dead.
D-E-A-D. The word bounced across my soul, haunting me.
I couldn't stop picturing Grace's charred body. Her soft skin curled and burned. Her vacant eyes staring at me.
I also couldn't stop imagining flames consuming Alessandro and singing his sweeping chestnut hair while swarming his olive skin in smoke. I pictured them holding one another as they were wiped from the world. I couldn't turn off the morbid thoughts plaguing my consciousness. I didn't want to try to sleep, even though I was absolutely exhausted. I was too afraid to see what nightmares my mind would conjure. It was a devastating realization and an irony I couldn’t fathom. All this time, I’d been protecting them. Now, despite my best efforts, I was the reason they were dead.
Don’t believe everything you think.
Maybe they were alive? Maybe somehow, someway, they...
I watched the security footage with a heavy feeling in my chest. I'd pulled it the moment I landed and got word of the explosion. I couldn't even tell you how many times I watched the video. I stared at it nonstop, rewinding and hitting play until I had every frame of the footage memorized. I burned it into my mind as I watched helplessly.
It started off normal. Grace marched up to the plane, her fiery hair trailing behind her as Alessandro jogged after her like a lost puppy. They faced each other and talked for about a minute before she was hugging him. A weird sense of jealousy hit me in the gut. They had grown closer over the years. I wished I could experience it. I wished I could witness it firsthand. There was something about the two of them being friends that made me happy; I just wished I could add myself to the dynamic. I guessed I'd never get the chance.
A crushing blast of grief abused my mind. I remembered a time when I held peace in my arms. Red hair. Porcelain skin. Smile like fire. I remembered the strength of a boy who was most definitely now a man. A precious mistake I wished I could fix. A broken heart I’d always been destined to mend.
I continued to watch with a pained expression, then paused on the moment Alessandro and Grace were hit with the blast of the explosion. Bright flames bathed the screen in light. Debris and smoke shot out with a vengeance. I took in every single millisecond. The force of the bomb made the security camera shake, then turn black. There was nothing else. I couldn’t stop trembling. Tears stung my eyes as I crumbled in pain.
Dead.
Dead. Dead. Dead.
I fleetingly considered what their funeral would be like, not that I could go. Who would stand and mourn them? I wanted to believe that they'd survived. I couldn't handle the alternative. If Alessandro and Grace were gone, then all of this was for nothing.
And even more so, they died because of me. Because of my involvement with the Ringleaders, two of the people I loved most in the world were gone. Guilt felt like stuck tar on my skin, clinging to me with its messy and sinister grip.
I'd been avoiding my phone. I didn't want to read the smug message from my contact. He was the one who told me what happened. He sent the footage with a threatening message that would be burned into my soul for the rest of my life.
A Ringleader shares his cage with no one.
My cage was suffocating me. The bars were closing in.
I never wanted to be a part of this elite group, but there wasn't much I could do. It was like ramming your fist into a brick wall. I was a good little soldier trapped in a cell.
I took a drink of whiskey and sobbed. The room they kept me in was dark, the only light creeping in through the blinds leading outside. I'd never been to Sydney before, but for the foreseeable future, it was home. I wasn't up to sightseeing anyway. I just wanted to lie in bed and grieve Grace and Alessandro. It was always like this. I was a valuable asset to the Ringleaders. They knew that no one could hack like I could. A valuable, unwilling prisoner.
Sometimes, I wished that I could just acclimate and adapt to the Ringleader way of life. It was like a wealthy cult that worshipped money and power. If I would just drink the Kool-Aid, my life would be much easier. But the initiation is brutal and bloody. You have to sell your soul for a spot, and I wasn’t capable of leaving my compassion and humanity for the illusion of freedom.
I needed my best friend. I needed to cry to Sunshine and let her hold me, reassure me. I just wanted to wallow with the only person who could make this abyss of pain in my heart feel a little less damning.
My fingers moved slowly. I grabbed the burner cell phone without thought, and I dialed her number without obsessing over the consequences. I was a broken man. I willingly left to protect my best friend, but no one was safe. No one could escape the Ringleaders.
"Hello?" her soft voice answered. I let out a hiss of air. Burning hot tears streamed down my cheeks. "Hello?" she called again. A pain-filled sob escaped my mouth. I'd been so lonely for so long. I missed human contact. I missed having people to share my life with.
"Nix?" she whispered. I didn't dare speak. I couldn't. It was bad enough that I called her. "Nix," she said again, her voice soft and full of pain. "Baby, where are you? Let me help you." I sobbed harder. My face was hot with emotion. My entire body trembled. I felt completely, utterly broken beyond repair. "Where are you? We can help you," she pleaded.
No. No one could help me. There was no escaping this. I refused to lose her too. I just needed this. This one moment of her and me. I needed to feel connected to the only person who could comfort me. "You can't talk?" she asked. I knew my place was bugged. They'd make me move again if they heard me talking to her. It was only a matter of time before they disconnected my call. I let out another huff of air in answer. Sunshine was always good at reading my mind. Every one of my idiosyncrasies was burned into her awareness of me.
"I'm assuming you're calling about...her."
Smart girl, not using names.
Her. Her. Grace.
Him, too. Oh, Alessandro.
Another sob escaped me.
A fresh wave of tears slipped down my cheeks, and I wiped at them with the back of my hand. I had to take my glasses off because there were so many. "Do you remember the time we found that rat in our apartment?" Sunshine asked. Her change of conversation caught me off guard. I sifted through memories, then released a wary smile when I remembered what she was referencing. We found a dead rat lying on the floor of our apartment. She squealed and screamed, begging me to pick it up. I bent down to grab it, but the fucker jumped away. Turns out, it wasn't dead after all. I nearly pissed myself out of shock.
Wait.
&n
bsp; It wasn't really dead. I sat up in bed and gasped. "You remember, don't you? Impossible to forget," she murmured.
I bit my fist before grabbing my laptop. If they weren't dead, then they were out there somewhere. "I miss you," she whispered. "My husband has been extra grumpy lately," she continued.
I bet he was. That was a multi-million dollar plane the Ringleaders burned, not to mention the fact that Grace was put in danger. A pang of guilt ripped through me, but the feeling didn't last. They were alive. Alive!
"I won't let him do anything stupid, though. We're starting to realize that this is bigger than what we're used to."
I started checking flights out of Mexico to Sydney. I realized when I got here that Alessandro found that little breadcrumb. "We have to be careful, you know. We have more to lose now."
I stopped searching to listen to my best friend. What was she talking about? "I'm pregnant," she whispered. "I'm going to be a mom."
I clutched my chest. A baby? My best friend was going to have a baby. Warmth and happiness filled me in that moment, and I had to bite my fist to keep the love I felt from flowing from my mouth. I wanted to be there for her every step of the way. I wanted to support her.
But then my thoughts were interrupted by the crushing reality that I couldn't break like this. I couldn't reach out to her. I couldn't risk her and the baby growing inside of her. If I had my way, I'd listen to her voice on repeat. I'd fall asleep to her words and wrap myself up in the familiarity she offered. But I couldn't be weak. I couldn't risk her.
"Are you still there?" she asked while sobbing. I didn't want to cause her pain. I hated that I was doing this to her. But the alternative was worse. “Nix, I can’t do this without you. I’m so fucking scared. I know it’s selfish, but I need you to come back. Whatever it is, we can tackle it together. Just come home. Let me help you. Let us save you.”
I wanted to do that, I really did. I wanted to be there for all the milestones. Sunshine’s kid would undoubtedly have a piece of my heart, and who else would teach it all of life’s greatest lessons? But knowing she was pregnant just solidified my resolve. I wasn’t just keeping her, Grace, and Alessandro safe anymore, I had her unborn child to think about too.
“Nix? Please just answer me,” she cried out. “I hate being away from you. We’re family, Nix. You’re the only family I have left, the only family that means anything to me. Please just come home.”
I opened and closed my mouth, trying to think of the words to say to provide comfort. Truth was, nothing felt right. At the end of the day, my hands were tied. There wasn’t much I could do. The Ringleaders were everywhere. Even a quick phone call was too risky.
"Banana Split," I said. She would know what that code meant. She would know that I was in danger. She would know that I'm doing what I have to do. It was a phrase we once shared when she was on the run, and I had adopted it for my own miserable predicament.
"Banana Split, my love," she whispered before hanging up. I knew what she meant.
Banana Split was just another way of saying I love you.
I love you, too, Sunshine. And I'll find a way out of this if it kills me.
Chapter Seven
Alessandro
I tried to lean back in my seat, but the economy chairs on our flight left little room for comfort. I guess I had become accustomed to flying private on Gavriel Moretti's jet. I didn't grow up with a silver spoon, but I quickly adapted to the lavish lifestyle my employer offered. I was pissed that some psycho blew it up.
The woman’s manic eyes and haunting words stayed with me long after we left that fiery scene. Maybe I was too cocky. I thought we were safe. Being a part of the Bullets gave me a false sense of security. Sure, the Moretti name had many enemies, but it was rare one of them was brave enough to actually do anything. Ever since I left Santobello, I went about my day convinced I was untouchable because of my association with the Bullets.
Today taught me otherwise.
I thought I had a good handle on the situation. I thought I would easily put Grace on a plane headed for home where she would safely wait for word from me. But I was wrong. We weren’t safe. Even though I wished we had more time to investigate, I knew that Grace and I couldn’t stay in one place for too long. Despite her injuries, we needed to move.
Even though it wasn’t ideal, I didn't care that we were crammed into the back of a gigantic plane flying over the Pacific or that we had to pay a ridiculous amount of money for these shitty seats. I didn't even care that there was a screaming two-year-old three rows in front of us that kept throwing shit my way. No, I was too thankful that Grace and I were alive to be pissed off about trivial things. She was asleep in the seat next to me, and her skin smelled like char and smoke. Her frizzy red hair framed her scratched face. She breathed softly next to me, and I was enamored with the sight of her rising and falling chest. Alive. She was alive. We were okay.
I made an executive decision the moment that private jet exploded, knocking us onto the concrete. There was no way in hell we'd be going back to the States. We had to go ghost. Grace whimpered in her sleep, and I adjusted the thin airplane blanket around her shoulders. The idea that something could've happened to her on my watch was clipping at my emotions. It all happened so fast, and yet the moment seemed to move in slow motion. We almost died. She almost died.
Hot fire and groaning metal still rang in my ears. Her body looked so frail when it slammed against the hard concrete. I had her blood on my dress shirt.
It was then I realized that Grace was more than an obligation. Grace had wormed her way into my heart and set up camp in my soul. She was a friend. A confidant. Someone I shared my loneliness with. And I would burn the world down before letting our enemies get to us—even if I had no idea who or what our enemies were.
The Ringleaders send their regards…
What did that even mean? The woman that blew up our plane sounded insane. I had my theories, of course. Phoenix was involved with some crazy ass group. When we worked together for the vigilantes, we came across some shady characters, but nothing like this. I briefly wondered if the Ringleaders were targeting Gavriel, but he had never heard of them before. One of the first things you learn when working for the mob is that you should always be aware of your enemies. Keep them closer than close.
How could we face a faceless enemy? Who were the Ringleaders?
"Alessandro?" Grace whispered while blinking. I could barely hear her over the flushing of the toilets behind us and the roar of the engines.
"You okay?" I asked while turning in my seat to face her. The skin on her palms was scratched and an angry shade of red.
"I'm just sore. How much longer?" she croaked while licking her dry lips. I grabbed a water bottle and handed it to her. She unscrewed the cap and took a long gulp. And then another.
I eyed my watch. "About six more hours.” She finished the rest of the water, and I handed her another. It was easy to get dehydrated on these long flights. She also needed to walk around soon. I already dragged her here with bruises and cuts littering her soft skin, I didn’t want to worry about blood clots, too.
“Fuck. This is the longest flight ever,” she groaned while shifting in her seat. She leaned against my shoulder and let out a huff of air. The clothes we found at a gift shop were swallowing her tiny frame, and I once again let my mind become consumed with anxiety. I worried that I should have taken her to a hospital.
There was some small debris in her arm. I managed to pull it out with tweezers on the ride to the airport. Thank fuck my suitcase was still in the SUV when the plane exploded, and I still had cash. I grabbed our fake passports and booked us on the first flight to Sydney. It was probably stupid to chase after Nix after what had happened, but I hoped they thought we were dead. The sooner we found out what we were up against, the better off we were at navigating their threats. I called Gavriel from a street phone to let him know that we were alive and going into hiding. He yelled at me and asked questions about the attacker
. I just hoped he didn’t skin me alive once we were back in the States. Though Grace had never admitted this out loud, she was convinced her brother thought of her as an obligation and didn’t truly care. She couldn’t have been more wrong. Gavriel Moretti loved his sister, he just didn’t know how to express it outside of violence and overprotection.
“Do you need more pain medicine?” I asked her. I knew she was bruised to hell. My back got burned slightly, but she was the one shoved to the ground like a rag doll.
“No. I’m fine. I don’t wanna feel groggy when we land.”
Stubborn little thing. I noticed a scratch on her cheek and reached out to stroke it. “You have a surprisingly high pain tolerance, Little One.”
She scrunched up her nose, then rolled her eyes. It was a new nickname, but I liked it. “Yeah, well. Can’t be a Moretti unless you can take a few hits,” she replied. My mood soured. I didn’t like the idea of her taking any hits.
“You weren’t always a Moretti, no?” I knew the answer already, but I wanted to hear her side of things.
She snuggled closer. “No. I am the bastard child of a mob boss and the forgotten daughter of a prostitute. I didn’t become a Moretti until my brother plucked me out of poverty, polished me up, and made me claim my birthright. Our apartment was a revolving door of skeevy men and drugs. My first words were ‘fuck off,’ and I could throw a fist before I could ride a bike. I know you want to take care of me, Alessandro. You still love Nix. And when you love someone, you do whatever you can to help them. But I’ve been my own advocate since the day I was born. And when we find him, when he relinquishes you of your obligations, I’ll still be alone. I’ll still be my own motherfucking hero. Excluding, of course, when exploding planes are involved. I’m willing to let you save me when psychos decide to send us up in flames,” she teased with an exhale. Grace liked to overcompensate with snappy sarcasm.
I blinked. Aside from her dark humor, I wasn’t expecting her to drop such a powerful monologue, but fuck if it didn’t make me want to wrap her up in a hug and fight off the world. “You’re not alone,” I whispered.