Monster Club

by Gavin Brown

  Tuckerville just stared in confusion, but the woman in sunglasses wasn’t having any of it. “Take them,” she said with a sigh.

  “Wait!” Tommy protested. “Don’t you want to hear about the treasure map that we found down there?”

  “Treasure map?” Tuckerville asked. “How is that possible? It’s just an old office building!”

  “No, no, it was actually built on the site of an ancient elfin home tree,” Tommy said. “There were the roots of the tree and carved on one of them was a map that only I memorized. I have a photographic memory, you see. The inscription read, ‘To find the ancient elfin doubloons, you must travel under the full moon—’ ”

  “He’s full of it,” the woman interrupted, pointing forward. Instantly, a very large man grabbed Tommy from behind. He struggled for a moment, but the guy knew some kind of pressure point hold, and Tommy realized with a yelp that no matter how strong he was, he was only going to get himself hurt. He was going to have to learn some of those wrestling tricks at some point.

  A moment later, he saw Karim and Spike pulled up behind him the same way.

  “Take their phones,” Tuckerville ordered. “And that junky purple sword they claim is a magical item.”

  They were roughly searched, and each of their phones was stabbed in turn with one of the harpoon guns. The electronics and magical spear tips did not interact nicely, leaving each of the phones a pile of rubble.

  “What do we do with them now, boss?” Sunglasses asked, eyeing the three kids like they were leftovers that no one wanted to eat.

  “Well, adventurers go missing all the time,” Tuckerville said. “Will anyone really care about a few more?”

  Sunglasses nodded. “Their parents will sue us, but we can just slow that down for years in the courts. Everyone knows adventuring is risky, and we have records of these three accepting the adventure.”

  “That’s it exactly,” Tuckerville said. “Adventuring is inherently risky. That’s what it says in the warning every time you open the app. Just another few kids who bit off more than they could chew.”

  Tommy was ready to struggle and fight to the death, but he noticed that Spike was standing calmly, smiling at the AppVenture CEO. Karim wasn’t looking quite as cocky, but he was nowhere near as panicked as he should have been.

  “That all makes perfect sense,” Spike said. “Too bad it would mean the end of your business and a nice long jail sentence for both of you.”

  “What are you talking about, girl?” Sunglasses demanded.

  “While you were listening to Tommy’s very convincing story,” she said, winking at him, “we uploaded all our videos.”

  “That includes the razorback telling us that you kidnapped it, and the phone call where you said you were going to kill us,” Karim said. “And it’s all online right now.”

  “What?!” Mike Tuckerville shrieked. “Is that true?”

  The woman was already on her tablet, tapping. “Hold on,” she said.

  Spike grinned.

  “Wait, I have to log in to my account …”

  Karim looked around nervously.

  “Just loading the page now …”

  Tuckerville stamped impatiently. “Well?”

  “They uploaded it before we iced the phones,” Sunglasses said. “It’s online and trending already.”

  Tuckerville clenched his fists and took a step forward, rage mixing with confusion on his face. Sunglasses stopped him, shaking her head.

  Karim stared, trying to make sense of it all. They had an advantage, but this wasn’t over.

  “If you’ve already screwed me over, why shouldn’t we just kill you now?” Tuckerville demanded, veins standing out on his forehead.

  Karim didn’t want to say anything, but no one else was offering a reason. He tried to think it through as quickly as possible. They were winning, but Tuckerville was right. If Tuckerville got desperate enough, he was capable of anything.

  “If we’re not hurt, you can play the whole thing off as a prank,” Karim said, looking the AppVenture CEO directly in the eyes. The boy’s whole body was shaking, but he didn’t care. “If three kids turn up missing in the same location, in the same day …”

  Tuckerville stared him down, but Karim didn’t flinch. He felt the agent’s grip holding him in place start to loosen.

  Spike spoke up, shaking off the man holding her. “You can keep your business and not go to jail. Or you can do something stupid. Your call, buddy.”

  Karim winced. Why was she antagonizing him?

  Tuckerville sneered at them.

  “And give us our sword back!” Tommy added.

  “What, this?” Tuckerville tossed the purple-coated sword on the ground. “That’s the most hideous ‘magical’ sword I’ve ever seen. Not even Cash 4 Magic Items would take that junk.”

  “Sir,” Sunglasses said, “we should get going. Remember the long game. What we’re really trying to accomplish—the reason we started AppVenture in the first place.”

  “Fine,” Tuckerville growled, glaring at the three friends in turn. He took a moment to look at each of them, as if fixing them in his mind for a later revenge. Karim crushed away the voice screaming in his head. He was going to be strong now. There would be time to be terrified later.

  Sunglasses gently pulled her boss away, and the rest of the AppVenture crew followed. The SUV’s doors slammed shut, and the vehicle sped away with a squeal of tires.

  And then, suddenly, a vehicle was coming from the other direction, with red-and-white lights blazing. The police car pulled a U-turn, and in the distance they saw the black SUV pulling over to the side of the road.

  Karim strained his eyes, trying to see. The police were out of their car, shining bright flashlights into the windows of the AppVenture SUV.

  And then there was a sight that made his heart soar. One of the police officers pushing Tuckerville against the black SUV, pulling his hands behind him, and snapping handcuffs on him.

  Two more police cars pulled up, sirens on and lights ablaze.

  “We need to get out of here,” Spike said.

  Once again, they ran. They left the park and headed down the road where they had come from. In the background they heard more police sirens, but before long the sounds were just a distant drone.

  When they were too tired to run anymore, the three friends slowed down and walked along the road. Somewhere, an owl hooted. The first rays of sunlight were just starting to peek over the horizon and the early commuters were beginning to appear.

  Karim laughed, staring up at the moon and letting the insanity of it all wash over him. They’d befriended a dragon, escaped a dungeon full of deadly monsters, and faced down a wealthy and powerful psychopath. Not a bad Tuesday, Karim thought.

  Just then, Karim heard a rustling. Tommy and Spike must have heard it too because they all turned to face the nearby bushes. Karim’s eyes widened as a figure stepped out of the shadows—a familiar figure he hadn’t seen in quite some time.

  Spike sighed and, in a dead, flat voice, said, “Hello, Luis.”

  “Colleen—sorry—Spike … are you okay?” Luis asked.

  In the moonlight, his face looked drained and tight. He might not have been trapped in a deadly dungeon all night, but he clearly hadn’t slept in a long time.

  Spike just glared at him for a long moment. He had the nerve to show up now? After all this? She wanted to choke him. She wanted to ignore him, maybe even get him fired.

  “We’re fine,” Karim answered when it became clear that Spike wasn’t going to. “Tuckerville and his crew left us alone after we uploaded all our data.”

  “We beat them, Mr. Hernandez!” Tommy added. “We did it!”

  “Yeah, we did,” Spike said, her voice almost a hiss. “No thanks to you, Luis.”

  “Honey,” her dad pleaded, “I had no idea what was going on. And then it was too late. I just wanted to make a deal to get you out of there.”

  Spike shook her head and felt the muscles i
n her neck clench tightly. “Next time, don’t try to do me any favors,” she said. “Better yet, don’t let there be a next time.”

  She wanted to punch him. She wanted to hug him. She wanted to run away.

  “Okay, I understand,” he said with a sigh. His shoulders were slumped. “But I’ve just—”

  “WHAT?” Spike asked. “What did you already go and do?”

  She wanted to slap him. She wanted to cry. She wanted to scream.

  “I won’t be going back to AppVenture,” her father said quickly. “Before I hijacked the self-driving limousine, I found the data on their catch-and-release program. I’m going to share it publicly. Oh, and I also paid out all the money for your jobs that they’ve been holding up. We IT guys have access to pretty much all the systems.”

  Spike chewed her lip as she considered this. It was something. Not nearly enough, but something.

  Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Tommy dancing, moving his hips in disorienting ways that Spike had never imagined, didn’t want to look directly at, and hoped that she wouldn’t remember.

  “We’re going to Adventure Camp! We’re going to Adventure Camp!” Tommy sang under his breath.

  Something caught in Spike’s throat. Her dad was trying hard. She might hate him, but she had to recognize that he was trying.

  She swallowed and blinked. They were still on an adventure. They had a job to do. She could focus on that, and deal with whatever these feelings were later.

  “Don’t share it publicly,” Spike told her father. “Take it straight to the Federal Monster Administration. They can protect you if Tuckerville tries to hit you back.”

  “Good idea,” Luis said. “Will do.”

  “Thanks, Mr. Hernandez,” Tommy said. “We know you weren’t trying to kill us.”

  “Spike,” her dad said, his voice sad and small. “I know this is a bad time to ask. But I haven’t talked to you in months. I just wanted to say … would it be okay if I came back and visited you sometime? I’d been talking with your mother about visiting on your birthday this year …”

  The seconds stretched into a minute as Spike stood perfectly still.

  She wanted to kick him. She wanted to tell him everything about their adventures. She wanted never to speak to him again. She wanted to hug him.

  “No thanks,” she said.

  For a moment, everyone stood in awkward silence, and Luis looked crushed.

  “But …” Spike began, sighing. “I guess you can call me on my birthday. If you want.”

  Her dad took a deep breath. His eyes were sad, but he was smiling. “Okay. I’d like that. I suppose I should probably stay away from AppVenture for a while. I’m going to stay in town and see if I can talk to your mother. I’ve finally been sending her the money I owe, but I owe her some apologies as well.”

  “Sure,” Spike said. “Goodbye, Dad.” She turned and walked away. After a moment, she could hear her two friends following behind her.

  She knew her dad was still standing there, watching them leave. Probably crying. But she didn’t look back. Maybe he wasn’t total trash, but she wasn’t going to give him that satisfaction.

  She wanted to talk to him again. At least one more time.

  They walked the long distance to the bus station in silence. Though they seemed to be out of danger, Karim could still feel his heart pounding in his chest. They had been walking for about twenty minutes when an SUV pulled up beside them.

  For a moment Karim thought it would be Tuckerville again, but the window rolled down and Sally “the Sheriff” Smithfield’s face leered at them.

  “School started an hour ago, and you don’t look like you’re even hurrying to get there,” Ms. Smithfield said.

  “Huh? How did you—” Karim started, but before he could say more, the van’s doors opened and a group of grown-ups piled out. Karim’s mom grabbed him in a tight hug, and he could see that Spike’s mom and Tommy’s dad were doing the same to their kids.

  “I’m so glad you’re okay!” Mrs. Wainwright said, a pleading note in her voice. “You were supposed to be home by nine—and then we heard about that building that collapsed under the weight of sour ooze—your phone signal disappeared all night, but we saw it reappear in that park for a bit and came over as fast as we could!”

  “Sorry. Um … it’s okay, Mom,” Tommy said. “We’re fine.”

  Karim could have kicked himself. When his parents got him a phone upgrade for his birthday, they had turned tracking on so they would always be able to find him.

  It took all of a minute for the four parents’ relief to turn into suspicion.

  “Where, exactly, were you three miscreants?” the Sheriff demanded.

  Karim knew instinctively not to give too much away. Making up stories had never been his strong suit.

  Spike didn’t disappoint him, and took the lead. “We heard there was some kind of monster in that building!” she said. “Then it turned out to be sour ooze, and we got trapped for a bit. But we made it out, no harm done!”

  Karim nodded, impressed. Technically, she hadn’t even lied.

  “It’s okay, as long as you’re safe!” Big Tom said, clutching his son tight, tears in his eyes.

  “No, it is not!” Ms. Hernandez said. Her hand was on Spike’s shoulder, but it looked like Ms. Hernandez knew better than to grab Spike too tightly. “I have been worried sick all night! And your father has been calling me nonstop and was very evasive about what was going on!”

  “I talked to Dad,” Spike said, and Karim noticed Ms. Hernandez’s eyebrows shoot up as she realized that Spike hadn’t called her dad by his first name. “We had a chat. He knows I’m okay.”

  That seemed to shut Ms. Hernandez up, as she considered the new state of affairs.

  “Well, isn’t that all just well and dandy.” Ms. Smithfield pressed a button on her keychain and the minivan’s doors opened up. “But the fact remains that you skipped out on school and caused a ton of worry and wasted time.”

  Karim, Spike, and Tommy all sighed at the same time. They knew there was no easy way of getting out of this one.

  “Now, you little jailbirds get in the back, and we’ll have you cleaned up and back in time for third period. I’d hate for you to miss social studies. We can handle the paperwork for your detention later, shall we say, during your lunch period?”

  They all climbed into the minivan as the three kids continued to dodge questions from their parents and guidance counselor. At some point Karim would have to mention that the new cell phone his parents bought him for his birthday was now long gone, but that could wait for later. They were in enough trouble as it was.

  When he got home, Karim’s dad was waiting in the kitchen. He gave a sigh as Karim entered, looking at him with a wistful look.

  “I know, Dad. Adventuring is too dangerous. I shouldn’t have been out there.” Karim hung his head. “And I should have learned from you. You took the risk, and you lost everything.”

  “No,” his dad said, shaking his head sadly. “I didn’t lose everything. When I was an adventurer, I was obsessive. All I cared about was making the next big capture, or getting big ratings for each show. That last season, it was really hard on your mother. We were fighting all the time. The truth is, she was just about to leave me. The accident … made me take stock. I realized that I wanted to be a better husband. A better father.”

  Karim didn’t know what to say. He had never heard this side of events before. He stood in shocked silence.

  “I’m not saying it was a good thing. But I have a good life, here with you and your mother. The accident took one life away from me but gave me another. I guess what I’m trying to say is … I don’t regret any of it. The adventuring, the risks, the fame … and I don’t regret ending up here, getting to stay with my wife and watching my son grow up every day.”

  His dad was saying good things, happy things, but somehow Karim could feel his eyes filling with tears, anyway.

  “I’m proud o
f you.”

  “Thanks,” Karim said. And then it just bubbled up out of him. “Dad … there’s something I have to tell you. Sidesplitter, I—I actually stole it from you. A while before you gave it to me. We swapped it for Tommy’s replica, that was what you gave me.”

  His dad paused for a long moment.

  “Well, I suppose that was very clever,” his dad said. “But you shouldn’t have taken it. Even though I always said it was going to be yours.”

  “I know.”

  His dad thought for a long moment, then shrugged. “I did dumber things than that when I was your age. I’d say you need to face some consequences, but from what I hear, your guidance counselor is taking care of that.”

  Karim hung his head.

  “Look,” his dad said. “Just … please don’t lie to me, okay? Let’s make a deal: You keep me in the loop, and I’ll help you with your adventures.”

  Karim let out a breath that he didn’t know he’d been holding. “Thanks, Dad. I’m really sorry I lied to you. It’s a deal.”

  The Fang gave a grin. “You really got that jerk Tuckerville, though, didn’t you?”

  Karim laughed. “I still can’t quite believe it.”

  His dad smiled. “I know more about monsters than just about anyone, except maybe that Mortimer fellow. You know, he was a real jerk to me once on an indigo leopard hunt in Malaysia,” the Fang said, a wistful look coming over him. “Have I ever told you that story?”

  As his dad launched into it, Karim was too relieved to follow all the details. He’d have to ask him to tell it again sometime when he could pay attention.

  Tommy was walking down the hall to detention when Elissa jumped onto his back, in some mixture of a hug and an attempted tackle. Tommy almost stumbled, but he was a total beefcake, solid as a rock. He straightened up and patiently waited for Elissa to drop down.

  “Dad just texted! We’re both registered for Adventure Camp!” Elissa said, practically skipping down the hallway alongside her brother. “And it’s just a few weeks away! Do you really think we’ll get to see a real spike-horned ironhoof this year?”