by Tee Jae
“Ok…” I wiped my tears quickly. “Where’s Kassidy and Mimi?” I asked, looking around surprised she was in the back with me and not them.
“Biggs took them to the airport, they should be on the first flight back to ATL.”
My face twisted up into a frown. I was relieved to know that they were ok but I was confused that Kassidy would blow town knowing what was going on. I made a mental note to call her as soon as I find out what’s going on with Khadi.
“Khadi will be fine.” She gave me a reassuring smile, while standing up and straightening out her bridesmaid dress.
“How do you know?” I looked at her and for the first time, I saw Khali Santana; not the bratty snobbish Khali when she didn’t get her way. I saw a strong woman who stood tall on her family’s name.
“Real niggas don’t die, Brooklyn and besides if he does, he will leave another one behind.” She pointed toward my stomach as if we already knew the gender of the baby. “Ill give you a few minutes and when you come out, you can meet us in the waiting room down the hall to your left.” She pulled back the curtain that separated the hospital beds in the emergency room and walked out.
I took a few minutes to myself before I walked out, purposely bypassing the waiting room and headed straight for the chapel to do what Mimi taught me to best. I walked inside, found the closest bench and dropped down to my knees and prayed.
Lord, you know my weaknesses and my strengths. I survived a lot over the years with you by my side, my parents abandoning me, my ex fiancé building a family outside of me. I was strong enough to take those punches and keep rolling but this… this, I’m not strong enough for Lord. My husband is my weakness and I need you now more than ever. Forget all the prayers I’ve ever sent to heaven in the past, this is the one that I need to count. I will be broken if you take my husband away from us, Lord.
Once I was out of the chapel, I bee lined it straight to the waiting room, so I wouldn’t miss the doctor but was halted by the receptionist.
“Ma’am…” I turned around to find her standing there with a clipboard in her hand. “I-I need you to fill out some paperwork.” She pushed the clipboard in my direction with a pen. I grabbed it from her and leaned up against the wall for a second trying to calm my nerves before looking over the paperwork.Everything was happening so fast, I was still distraught as the events played back through my mind, leaning my head back against the wall, bracing myself before I walked into that waiting room.
“What did they tell you?” Roselina asked catching me off guard. I dropped the clipboard down next to my side and pulled myself up from the wall for a hug that I needed from anyone right about now, even if it was her, but she took a step back from me. I let it slide thinking she was still in disbelief about what happened.
“Nothing yet, they just gave me this paperwork that needs to be filled out.” I sighed, walking past her, heading to the waiting room.
“Well, do you have any idea who’s behind this?” she asked accusingly, following close behind me.
“Excuse me?” I turned around looking at her like she lost her damn mind. She was so close behind me I almost knocked her down.
“Someone has to know something,” she said looking me up and down as if she was disgusted with me even breathing. “My son runs the south so something isn’t adding up here.” She looked at me funny.
“What are you saying Roselina?” I asked, coming to my own defense.
“I’m saying you’re his woman. You keep his bed warm at night, you are always around so you have to know something my dear. Any beef? Have you heard him on the phone with anyone? A damn kingpin that runs the south just doesn’t get shot on his wedding day and no one knows nothing.” She said low and tightlipped.
“So, you don’t think its strange that Khadi disowns Khaza and the minute he forces his way into the venue that my husband gets shot?” I asked a little too loud attracting attention from a few nurses passing by in the hallway.
Her eyes widened in shock, “What? You think I don’t know what’s going on Roselina? Nobody else is stupid enough to go after Khadi in his own city.” I rolled my eyes and walked inside the waiting room.
“Listen, you wench…” she started, but stopped once I made it into the waiting room.
“Brooklyn, you wanna tell me what the fuck is going on?” Khaddo immediately jumped up from his chair approaching me, forcefully grabbing me by my shoulders.
“Khaddo!” Khali shouted, jumping up from Zilla’s lap, while Biggs wedged himself in between Khaddo and I. “What the hell is wrong with you? Don’t you ever grab on Brooklyn like that.”
He let go of me but kept his eyes trained on me, “Look, I’m sorry, ‘ight?” he stepped back straightening out his tux. “What the fuck was that between you and Khaza? Our family has been through enough and he’s been gone for four months and this is how you welcome my little brother back…” he paused for a moment. “I got love for you but you a Santana by paper, not blood, don’t ever come at my little brother like that again.” He sneered in my direction.
I took a moment and registered what the hell he just said to me and was angrier than hurt. I bet if his gullible ass knew Khaza had been woken from his coma and why he wasn’t invited to our wedding, he wouldn’t be singing this same tune. I just exchanged vows with my husband a few hours ago and instead of breaking the news to Khaddo, I would let Khadi do it if he makes it out of surgery. But I’d be a damn fool if I didn’t stand up for myself, especially since my man is incapable of doing so at the moment, so fuck it!
“Well…” I stared him right back in his eyes, “Like I said back at the reception, if my husband says fuck ‘em, then its fuck ‘em,” I shot back, before turning towards Roselina, “I thought you beefed up the security on Khaza?” I asked, watching her squirm as Khaddo refocused his attention on her. See I didn’t have a damn thing against Roselina but I was starting to see all the slick shit she was doing when it came to her boys. For some reason, I felt she didn’t like me for Khadi especially since every chance, she get she would bring up, Toi, his deceased girlfriend. I mean, how else would Khaza be able to barge into our reception just a minute before Khadi was shot?
“Fuck she talking about?” he looked back and forth between Biggs and Roselina. When no one had the guts to speak up, I continued,
“Look around,” I stepped out of the way, so he could have a clear view of the waiting room, so he could see everyone. “Now tell me where your little brother is while his big brother is in there fighting for his life?” he looked around, letting what I said marinate, “He’s not here because Khadi disowned him.” I answered him before looking back in the direction of Roselina.
“Get the fuck outta here,” he brushed me off, turning to his mom for validation but she quickly dropped her head avoiding eye contact with him. “Somebody tell me what—”
“Santana family,” a short Asian man in his white doctor coat appeared from behind the double doors. Everyone jumped up and headed in his direction. “Mrs. Santana?” He asked looking around.
Roselina tried to walk up before me but I cut her off. “I’m his wife, Mrs. Santana.” I spoke up, shaking his hand and walking away with him to a private corner.
“Your husband is fine. We removed the bullet in his left arm, the two bullets that hit his upper torso were blocked by the bullet proof vest he had on. The impact of the bullets caused his body to go into shock which in turn knocked him out unconscious. Thank God he had that vest on.” He smiled at me.
I looked up towards the ceiling silently thanking the Lord for hearing my prayers. Relief was an understatement, “When can I see him?” I asked eagerly.
“In a few minutes we will move him down to a regular room. He’s still a little drowsy and out if it from the medicine that we gave him after removing the bullet in his arm, but your husband will be fine.” He placed his hand on my shoulder for assurance.
“Thank you so much Doc.” I walked away to let everyone in the waiting room know the good
news.
*****
I sat curled up on the chair in the corner. I had already made up my mind that I was going to tell him about Gator the minute he opened his eyes. Originally, I blamed Khaza but the more I thought about it, this had Gator’s name written all over it. I kept my eyes closed while different scenarios ran through my mind, but also, I played sleep, so I wouldn’t have to utter two words to Roselina. I mean, I liked the old hag, but she was becoming a pain in my ass. The long stares she gave me like I wasn’t any good for her son was beyond annoying. I felt her presence in the room and every once in a while, I could feel her look my way. It’s like I felt her dark, beady eyes staring at me.
I’d been calling Kassidy non-stop to let her know that everything was good on our end, but she hadn’t returned any of my calls. Mimi said that Kassidy dropped her off once they landed, so I assumed she was sleep. I shot her a quick text letting her know that Khadi and I were ok. Once I felt Roselina wasn’t paying attention, I would sneak a peek watching her call who I assume was Khaza repeatedly. I felt my shoulders release a tense hold once I heard the door open and she walked out.
Chapter 2
Khaza
“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!” I slapped the palm of my hand against my forehead as I walked back and forth on the living room floor of the Twins condo on South Beach. I can’t believe I fucking sold my soul to the devil. Ever since I got shot my head hasn’t been on straight, but I can’t believe I stooped this fucking low. I looked down at my mother’s picture popping up on the screen of my iPhone, as she continuously tried to reach me since I ran out of the reception that day.
“Fuckkkkkkkkkkkkk!” I hollered, throwing my phone against the wall, watching it shatter before hitting the floor. I fucked up bad this time. I sat back on the couch and popped a couple of Oxycodones to ease the pain physically and mentally as the tears threatened to fall from my eyes. “He fucking promised me! He promised he would always be there for me and he just disowns me like I’m nothing.” I silently cried. That bullet was meant for Brooklyn and now my brother was probably somewhere on an operating table fighting for his life, if he wasn’t already gone. I lit the blunt that was pre-rolled on the coffee table and took a pull from it before taking a stroll down to the times when our life was much simpler.
Summer 2000
“Khadi! Khadi!” I ran into our small two-bedroom apartment in the pork-n-beans projects, slamming the raggedy screen door behind me.
“Stop slamming mama’s door!” Khali hollered, picking her head up from the Giga Pet toy that Amanda, the neighborhood thief stole and sold to Khadi for a few dollars. That’s how Khadi was; he hustled and did any and everything he could for us. He was the man of the house and lived up to every word of it. I rolled my eyes at Khali right before bumping into Khadi in the kitchen.
“Whoa, slow down lil bro. What happened to you?” he quickly hung up the house jack and grabbed my face examining my bruises. “Who the fuck did this to you?” he asked, walking out of the kitchen to the bedroom that the three of us shared, sliding his feet in a pair of old purple and gold Allen Iverson Reeboks; we called those his ‘whip a nigga ass shoes.’ He laced them up tight and hollered out for Khaddo who was most likely closed up in mama’s room either watching something nerdy on tv or studying. See, me running home for Khadi to help fight my battles happened at least once a week. At ten-years-old, I was always hanging with the older boys in the hood and getting myself into some shit that Khadi and Khaddo always had to get me out of.
“Khaddo!” Khadi’s voice boomed loudly, shaking the paper-thin walls in the apartment. Khaddo emerged from mama’s room and looked down at Khadi’s shoes and then to my face. “Get your kicks on your feet cuz we going down to the court. They fucking with lil bro again.” He told Khaddo, while grabbing his baseball bat that he kept on the side of his bed for backup. Khadi’s hands were lethal, but he always thought ahead just in case we were outnumbered.
“Point ‘em out, Khaza, who de’ fuk out ‘dere puttin’ their hands on yu?” Khadi asked me, as we walked fast across the court.
The court was a dilapidated playground that sat in the heart of the projects where everyone hung out ‘til the wee hours of the morning serving dope fiends, playing basketball and watching fights. Hell, it was used for everything except an actual playground for kids to play on. The only thing that was in ok condition was the cemented red and blue slide. Everything else was falling apart; from the swing sets where the seats were hanging to the side, so no one was actually able to swing on them, to the monkey bars with no actual bars in the middle.
Demarcus was a dark skin fat nigga most little kids labeled him as the neighborhood’s bully. He pulled himself off the green box making his way towards Khadi. I hated Demarcus because he would always try to tell me what to do when my brothers weren’t around and when I wouldn’t listen, he would sic his crew on me.
“Nigga, yo’ lil punk ass bruddah always out here starting shit and when it’s time to put in work, he running to you like a lil bi-.”
Before he could finish, Khadi hauled off and punched the fuck out of him. He hit him so hard, I thought I heard his neck snap back before he hit the ground.
“Ooooohhhhhh,” everyone said in unison, forming a small crowd around us.
“Who else want some? Huh?” Khadi barked at Demarcus’s crew as they backed down.
Demarcus pulled himself off the ground holding his bloody, broken nose staggering, “What the fuck y’all doing? Get his ass!” he hollered at his crew of young fake thugs who were no match for us. They were getting ready to attack Khadi and I until Khaddo came from around the building with the bat swinging slowly at his side.
“We don’t want no tr-trouble.” Jermaine, the kid who actually initiated the fight with me, stuttered and began backing up from us.
Khadi pushed me out in front of him, “Get your lick back! Whoever hit you, sucker punch that nigga right now.” At the age of fourteen, Khadi spoke with so much authority. I took off walking towards Jermaine and Tyrone. “Better knock them on their ass too.” I could hear Khadi in the back of me speaking, as I reeled my fist back knocking them down one by one.
“Khazaaaaaa,” Twin stood butt naked in front of me snapping her fingers in my face. She grabbed the blunt out of my hand and took a pull from it. I had been fucking her and her sister nonstop since I touched down in Miami two days ago. “Your phone won’t stop ringing,” she shoved my burner phone in my hand. “Shit woke me up.” She handed me the blunt back before turning around and storming back into the bedroom making her ass jiggle with each stomp.
I looked down at the private call coming through on my phone and rage surged through my body. I immediately flipped it open, “What the fuck happened, nigga? You said my brother wouldn’t get hurt. Now he’s probably dead because of you. If he doesn’t pull through I’m going to fucking kill you myself.”
Chapter 3
Gator
I hung up in Khaza’s face; I wasn’t about to let him ruin my high. Shiddd, it felt good being back home and it felt even better knowing that bitch ass nigga Khadiwason his way to meet his maker, so tonight I was celebrating. The Gold Room was popping, expensive liquor bottles with the sparklers attached to them danced in the air throughout the club and the weed smoke was so thick, a nigga could barely see. Justice decided to throw me a welcome home party in the city and I was feeling good. I tossed some dollar bills in the air while YFN Lucci performed “Woke Up (Boss)” on stage hyping up the entire crowd.
I was dressed in a pair of grey stonewashed jeans with a black long sleeve fitted cashmere tee. My dreads were pulled up into a man bun on the top of my head with a silver LV scarf wrapped around my head. The matching LV belt and sneakers set off my entire outfit. My neck was graced with a diamond Cuban link chain and the iced out Hublot watch, a wedding gift I got from Yani, was like a fucking chick magnet. These bitches in my city already knew I was that nigga, so they were flocking around my section trying to get my attention, they could
n’t get enough of ya boy.
“Well it’s good to see you home Gator.” I looked down at Tasha standing in front of me looking badder than the last time I seen her. She was showing all thirty-two of her teeth happy to be in a niggas presence. A smile crept up on my face revealing my iced-out grill.
“What’s good, Tasha?” I admired the black sheer see thru jumpsuit that hugged her body. I used to fuck with Tasha heavy and she was a steady side bitch of mines until she started falling too deep and running her mouth about us to people in the streets and it got back to Brooklyn. Brooklyn confronted her and whooped her ass and I promised to cut her off and I did but tonight the lust in her eyes let me know she would be willing to take an ass whooping over my dick any day.
“What’s up with you for tonight?” She ran her long ass tongue over her bright red lipstick looking up at me with lust in her eyes. “I heard you a free man now.” She smirked.
I leaned over unhooking the rope, so she could join me in my section and have a good time. “Don’t believe everything you hear.” I whispered in her ear over the music, slapping her fat ass as she walked by. Shiddd, a nigga could play around until Brooklyn comes running back home. Plus, Tasha pussy was in my top five and she never had a problem bringing another bitch in the bedroom, when for years, I had to beg Brooklyn to do it.
“Damn nigga, you better slow ya roll big bro before Yani pop up from the behind the bar or some shit.” Justice walked up to me drinking straight out of a Hennessy bottle staring at Tasha’s ass as she grabbed a bottle out the ice bucket and took a seat on the sofa.