“I’m fine. We’ll talk about it tomorrow, ok?”
“Ok. Goodnight Elle.”
“Goodnight Jon.”
Eleanor walked to her room and took off her New Year’s Eve dress that she had changed back into for the drive home from Patrick’s place. She kicked off her heels, fell into bed, and was soon fast asleep, with a dreamy smile on her face.
Chapter 17
The next day Eleanor woke up feeling like she’d been asleep for a month. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d slept that deeply, but it felt great. She walked into the lounge and saw Jonathan sitting at the dining table. As soon as she walked in, he shuffled with what looked like a couple magazines, as if he was hiding something from her.
Laughing Eleanor asked, “What are you doing? Trying to hide something?”
Jonathan’s face was tight and hard to read.
“Oh my god Jonathan, what’s going on? You’re kind of freaking me out.”
Jonathan sighed, paused, then said, “I guess it was going to happen eventually. I worried about this when you started your friendship with him.”
Eleanor sat down at the table across from him, feeling very confused. After another moment, Jonathan slid the magazines he had been looking at across the table to her.
“I went out to get some milk, we had run out. I was just walking past the off license and saw this on the newsstand.”
Eleanor looked down and realized it was a one of the trashy tabloids she always spotted when she was out running errands. Looking closer at the front page story, she took in the headline, “Patrick Reynolds’ New Flame?” And then she saw the photo, or rather, two photos, one of her and Patrick leaving his home, with his arm around her shoulder, and another of him saying goodbye at her flat, taken just as he had kissed her goodnight. Only, from the angle taken from the street, it looked like significantly more than an innocent kiss on the cheek. Eleanor flipped to the third page to read the full story, and was horrified to see that the reporter had clearly been looking into them for more than a day or so. They knew where she was studying and had a quote from a “classmate,” but based on what was said about her she doubted this so-called classmate was someone she really knew. It was all fairly positive and generic, just that she was an American studying in London who had “caught the eye” of London’s rising star. There was a clearer picture that they’d clearly taken from her Instagram, as well as pictures of her school and of Patrick’s mews house. It was a long enough story considering the reporter didn’t seem to actually know much of anything.
“So much for not getting into any complicated relationships,” she heard Jonathan say.
“Oh Jon, this is not what it looks like,” Eleanor said with a sigh.
“No judgement cousin, you know I like Patrick. I’m honestly surprised this hasn’t happened sooner, by what you’ve said, it’s not like you all have been hiding away, you’ve seen each other out in public. But I don’t like that it seems like they were waiting for you to leave his place and then followed you back here.”
“I know, that’s pretty creepy. But I’m sure it will blow over. Patrick starts filming his new movie next week. We’re not going to be able to see each other very often, and school will be starting the new term next week as well. We’ll just lay low and this will pass. I’m sure some football player or reality TV star is going to do something much crazier and will take the attention.”
Jonathan didn’t look convinced. “Are you sure you’re ok though? You still haven’t told me what exactly happened.”
“Ugh,” Eleanor groaned, “Do we really have to talk about it?”
“Well, no, not if you don’t want to. I’m not going to make you talk about Mark if you don’t want to. But he said some weird things after you left, and I was really worried.”
Eleanor looked up, worriedly, “What did Mark say?”
Furrowing his brows, “Just that he was sorry, and he didn’t mean to hurt you? That it was an accident? You looked ok when you left, angry and upset but physically ok, so I assumed he meant he didn’t mean to make you upset, but he looked really freaked out Eleanor, like he expected me to punch him. Eventually he left, about ten minutes after you did. What happened before you left?”
“Oh Jon, it was…well it wasn’t nothing, but it wasn’t serious and I don’t think he intended to hurt me.” Seeing Jonathan’s face change from worried to anger, she rushed to continue, “He just grabbed my wrist to stop me from walking away, he was holding it a little too tightly and I panicked and when I yanked it out of his grasp it got twisted a bit. It’s fine though, I put ice on it at Patrick’s and you can barely see the bruise anymore.”
“You were bruised?!” Jonathan gasped. “Let me see Elle, please.”
Reluctantly Eleanor put her hand on the table. The bruise was already fading and was only a very yellowish green now. But it was still noticeable.
“I don’t want to make this a big thing Jon. It’s over. I don’t want to see Mark anymore. I don’t think we’re good for each other. He just can’t let it go and seeing me just makes it worse. He’s not a bad guy and I don’t mind if you keep hanging out with him. But I’m done discussing him or trying to give him a chance to be my friend. Even if I wasn’t friends with Patrick, I really have no interest in Mark. He honestly reminds me too much of my father. Charming on the surface, but very thoughtless and careless of others when you get down deeper. Maybe he’s different with all of you guys, but I don’t think he ever really cared about me at all. I can’t make the same mistakes my mom did.”
Jonathan watched as a tear slipped down Eleanor’s cheek.
“And it’s different with Patrick?” He asked gently.
“Oh Jon,” Eleanor said, sighing softly. “It’s the complete opposite. Patrick truly is a friend. I mean, I know he’s interested in more, but he’s also very respectful. And just for the record, I slept in the guest room the other night, and despite what the angle of that picture looks like, he only kissed me on the cheek, for like, half a second, when he dropped me off last night. We’re friends. Full stop. Maybe, eventually, it will turn into something more, but for now we’re just friends. Which is just what I need, and I think he’s enjoying the friendship too. Like, there’s no pressure from him. He seems genuinely happy just hanging out. I’ve never been with a guy like him. And I’m not talking about the celebrity stuff.”
“All I care about is that you’re happy Ellie. Really. And I do like Patrick, he’s a good bloke, in more ways than one from what I’ve seen. I’m not going to tell you what to do. You’re a grown woman and you’ve never needed me to make decisions for you, so please believe me when I say I’m not trying to be the big brother, protector figure here. I just want you to be ok. And for the record, I think Mark has burned his bridges with both of us. I don’t care if he didn’t intentionally bruise you. He should have never grabbed you in the first place.”
Eleanor tried to interject but Jonathan held up his hand to stop her, “No. Mark has a bad habit of acting impulsively. He’s not a bad guy, I agree. But he’s never been rejected, that I’m aware of, and he’s always had a sense of entitlement, like the same rules don’t apply to him and that all he has to do is say he’s sorry and didn’t mean to cause harm or offense. Well that’s pathetic. Because I’ve gotten upset with girlfriends in the past, but whenever one turned to walk away from me I never tried to physically stop them from going.”
Sighing, “I know Jon. I know. There’s no excuse for him. Look, I really just want to move on from Mark, and from this,” Eleanor said, gesturing at the tabloids. “I’m going to go for a walk, maybe down to St. Paul’s or something. I just need to get some air and clear my head.”
“Ok, do you want me to come with you,” Jonathan asked kindly.
Smiling at him, “No, I’m ok. But I can pick us up some takeaway for dinner on my way back if you like? Cozy night in, just us cousins?”
“Sounds perfect,” Jonathan agreed.
Eleanor went to h
er room and changed into some jeans and a sweater, and pulled on her favorite black over knee boots. As she was walking out into the entryway and pulling on her wool coat, there was a knock, or rather, more of a pounding, on the front door. Eleanor stopped at the sound.
Jonathan came out of the kitchen and looked at her, both of them frozen.
“Did you buzz anyone up?” He asked puzzled.
“No, did you?” Eleanor replied. They never had unannounced visitors, they always had to buzz guests up from downstairs.
There was another knock at the door, and Eleanor heard what sounded like Patrick’s voice talking to someone outside, but he sounded angry or frustrated.
“That sounds like Patrick,” Eleanor said to Jonathan.
Jonathan opened the door, and sure enough, there was Patrick, looking very angry and speaking heatedly to Mark.
Looking between the two of them, Jonathan demanded, “How did you get in the building?”
Before Mark could say anything, Patrick said, “I saw him hanging around the door as I was walking up. Before I could get to him someone came out of the building and he slipped in, I managed to get to the door before it shut. I’m sorry we didn’t call up first.”
“Oh sure, aren’t you just the knight in shining armor. Eleanor and Jonathan are my friends—“
Jonathan interrupted, “—your friends? You sure about that mate? After the way you’ve been acting lately and the way you’ve treated Eleanor? She was a good friend to you. Because I told her she could trust you. You’re walking a thin line with both of us Mark.”
“Oh, she’s been a good friend huh. Leading me on, telling me she’s not open to a relationship, meanwhile she’s sleeping around with this guy, she needs to just make a damn choice about what she wants!”
Patrick and Jonathan both stiffened where they each stood, at the same time they both started, “She—“
Loud enough to be heard over the rising voices of the men, Eleanor silenced them all, “—She can speak for herself, so would all of you shut your mouths.” Seeing the three of them ready to rip into each other had Eleanor seething with rage.
To Patrick and Jonathan, “I appreciate that you both want to stand up for me, but just stop. I can deal with this myself.” To Mark, “You’ve got some bloody cheek coming over here uninvited. Maybe you were too drunk New Year’s Eve to fully understand, so let me make myself clear now that you appear to be sober. We’re done. Over. I don’t want anything to do with you. I have no problem with you salvaging your friendship with Jon, if you can, but you and I will never have any kind of relationship going forward. You have shown more than once that you are incapable of listening to me or respecting my decisions. My relationship with Patrick is completely separate from my relationship with you and is none of your damn business and you have no right to judge me for those photos or for whatever twisted assumptions you have about my friendship with Patrick. And as for making a choice about what I want, I would think someone as smart as you would have figured it out by now. If you want me to choose between you or Patrick, I’m going to choose Patrick, since he’s never once made me feel uncomfortable or pressured in any way and since he’s always respected my desire to be friends and nothing else.”
“Oh sure, those pictures look soooo friendly,” Mark snarled.
Rolling her eyes, “Oh grow up Mark. This is just getting annoying now. You’re not four years old and I’m not some toy that’s been taken away from you. I don’t owe you any explanation and quite frankly I don’t give a damn what you think about me. I’m not ashamed about any aspect of my relationship with Patrick or about those photos. So if we’re done here? I have plans.”
Patrick put his hands in his coat pocket sheepishly, “Eleanor I’m sorry, I only came over here to talk about the photos in person and make sure you were ok.”
“It’s ok Patrick.”
Mark looked like he was going to say something, but Jonathan spoke before he could, “Mark, you and I need to talk. Go into the lounge and wait for me.” Mark looked like he was going to argue but Jonathan stared him down, after a few seconds, Mark sighed and walked into the lounge. Jonathan looked at both Patrick and Eleanor and then followed Mark into the lounge and shut the door, leaving Eleanor and Patrick alone in the entryway.
“Are you ok?” Patrick asked gently.
“I’m tired. I’m just…tired. I don’t need this drama with Mark.”
“Umm, about the photos, I’m sorry Elle, I’ve never had paparazzi hiding outside my flat, I wasn’t expecting them to be there.”
Patrick looked so sorry and worried, Eleanor couldn’t help but feel bad.
“It’s not your fault. I’m not even that upset about it. It was kind of you to come over to see me.”
“You’re not mad?” Patrick asked, relief starting to show on his face.
“Of course I’m not mad. Look, as long as you and I are on the same page about our friendship, that’s all I care about.”
Patrick took a step towards Eleanor and put his hand gently on her arm. “My friendship with you is one of the most important relationships in my life right now.”
“Thank you Patrick, really. That means a lot to me.”
“So, you have plans? I don’t want to keep you.”
“I just wanted to go for a walk and maybe do some writing.”
“Do you want some company?” Patrick asked hopefully.
“Honestly I think I just need some time to myself. Is that ok?”
“Of course it is. Can I walk you downstairs?”
“I’d like that,” Eleanor said with a smile.
She grabbed her bag with her notebook and iPad and together she and Patrick walked downstairs and turned towards the square. They walked and made companionable small talk about the weather until they made it out to the main road near Holborn Station. There they said goodbye and Eleanor headed in the direction of Oxford Street.
* * * * *
Eleanor walked for a while, the road she was on eventually turned into Oxford Street and she began passing by all the big department stores. The Christmas lights were still hanging over the road and the Christmas displays were still in the windows of the shops. Seeing all the festive displays made Eleanor feel a little calmer. The last several days had been such a roller coaster. Christmas had been fantastic, then New Year’s Eve started great, turned sour, then was rescued by going to Patrick’s. New Year’s Day at his place was fantastic and she’d woken up this morning feeling really good. Then there were the pictures in the tabloid and the confrontation with Mark and the lingering unsettled feeling in the back of her mind about Patrick.
Before she knew it she reached Marble Arch and found herself walking into Hyde Park. She could see Winter Wonderland was still going on but she turned to continue away from the fair and the busy crowds. She could hear the screams of laughter coming from the rides, and though it was still daytime, the clouds and the shortened daylight of winter made two o’clock feel much later than it was. As the noise of the fair faded behind her, she continued walking into Hyde Park and towards Kensington Gardens.
Eventually she came to a bench that overlooked a large field and the intersection of a few park paths. She sat down and began watching other park visitors as they walked along the path or played in the little bit of snow that dusted the field. As she sat there she found herself replaying all the events of the last few months since her arrival in August. Meeting Patrick, starting school, getting to know all of Jon’s friends—including Mark—and making her own friends at school, getting to know Patrick and becoming friends with him, all the problems with Mark, Christmas, New Year’s Eve and then New Year’s Day, and now the tabloid photos. She couldn’t help laughing out loud at the ridiculousness of it all. She thought back to what her life had been like this time last year.
Jon and Aunt Vickie had come to visit Eleanor and Cassie in Phoenix. She and her mom had taken them to see Zoo Lights at the Phoenix Zoo and the luminaria walk at the Botanical Gardens. She and
Jon had gone for long hikes on Christmas Day and New Year’s Day. Michael had joined them all for dinner at the house a couple times, but even then, it felt like he was only there out of a sense of obligation, not that he actually wanted to spend time with her family. Of course, at the time she had dismissed those thoughts and put on a happy face for Jon. She remembered how envious she was when she and Cassie dropped Jon and Vickie off at the airport for their flight back to London, how desperately she had wished she were flying back with them. The fact that she could have so easily left her life—and Michael—behind in that moment should have been a sign of things to come. If she had known that only a few months later he’d break up with her, she probably would have spent her savings on a ticket right there and then and gone back with Jon and Vickie.
She continued thinking about the past year. All the boring and monotonous days teaching in a department that didn’t care about her, countless shifts in her old job at the bookstore, all those days spent writing and day dreaming in the coffee shop after class wishing for something exciting and different to happen to her.
She started laughing, loudly and almost hysterically. Her life in the last twelve months had been like one of her favorite chick lit novels or romantic comedies. “Girl with boring life gets broken up with by boring boyfriend. Girl decides to move halfway across the world and chase her dreams. Because why not? Upon arriving in London, girl meets movie star crush AND catches the eye of a charming but perhaps inappropriate friend of her cousin’s.” It was all too ridiculous. She’d craved something exciting and different, well…she had gotten that, and then some. Be careful what you wish for, that’s what they always said right?
Eleanor was so grateful, the more she thought about it. She really had been given such an incredible gift being able to come live and study in London, making so many amazing friends. Everything that had happened with Mark had been unfortunate but still a learning experience. Between Mark and Michael, she was learning exactly what she didn’t want in a relationship. And Patrick had been slowly showing her many of the things she did think she would want, when she eventually felt she was ready for a relationship again. Her laughter quieted as she thought about Patrick. As she looked out over the field she spotted a young couple walking hand in hand and leaning into one another. Even from a distance she could tell how close and intimate their relationship was.
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