The Wild

by Owen Laukkanen

  Dawn tries not to do more than glance at him; she looks just long enough to see that it’s Alex, and he’s dead.

  (His eyes are open. He’s not moving. He’s buried under snow. He’s dead.)

  This should be enough. She’s done her job. She’s found the body and confirmed that it is in fact a body.

  That it’s Alex’s body.

  She can go back to the others and report this with her head held high, feeling like a Grizzly Bear and not a Bear Cub, and she can tell Warden and the others and they can all as a group decide what to do next.

  But some sick side of Dawn is actually curious. She can’t not look, now that she’s gone to the trouble. She glances back at Alex. Brushes a little more snow off.

  And now she can see how not normal he really looks.

  There’s something wrong with his eyes, for one thing. They’re open but not open, like he’s blind or something. They’re a weird kind of not color, so he doesn’t look entirely like Alex anymore.

  Plus, his face is messed up.

  It looks like somebody kicked the shit out of him. He’s got bruises and cuts and swelling everywhere. Dawn surmises this must be what happens when you plummet six hundred feet to your death.

  (She’s thankful, for once, that they’re high in the mountains and that summer is over. No way could she handle it if there were, like, bugs on the body.)

  Dawn lets herself look away from the body. She looks up the cliff face and it’s jagged and black and sharp as far as she can see. She can easily imagine he picked up the bruises and cuts on the way down, when he fell. If anything kicked the shit out of him, it was probably nature.

  But that still leaves the question:

  Who in the Bear Pack stabbed him?

  OH YEAH. SORRY.

  Aside from the bruises and the minor cuts and scrapes that Dawn can see and infer must have come from the fall, well…

  There’s a big jagged

  bloody

  wound

  in Alex’s chest.

  It’s not the kind of thing that just happens when you fall.

  ALEX IS LYING FACEUP. His eyes are open. He would have died seeing the sky, seeing the snow fall.

  Did he know it would bury him?

  Did he wonder if anyone would ever find him?

  I found you, Dawn thinks. But how did you get here?

  And who did this to you?

  The counselors had a knife. And bear spray. But Christian didn’t stab Alex, and neither did Amber.

  That means it was someone in the Pack.

  * * *

  Dawn stares down at Alex and his bloody, jagged wound, and she sure as hell has her suspicions who did it, but—before she can really explore them—someone sneaks up behind her.

  “What are you doing?”

  A hand grabs Dawn’s shoulder, rough, and Dawn screams before she can stop herself, turns around, flailing, to find Brandon standing over her, his hands up to defend himself. “Whoa,” he says, stepping back. “Holy shit, Dawn. Just relax.”

  Slowly, Dawn stands, the sound of her scream echoing up the wall of the cliff and along the bottom of the trench. She can hear alarmed voices through the forest; the rest of the Pack, coming to investigate.

  They’re coming, Dawn thinks, and now we’ll get some answers.

  Brandon doesn’t try to touch her again. He stands in front of her, just a little too close, watching her and not saying anything.

  There’s something weird about him, and Dawn realizes it’s that he’s not smiling his usual stupid smile, the one where it looks like he’s laughing at you for some reason and you have no idea what. The one where it looks like he believes you’re stupid and he’s better than you and you just haven’t figured it out yet.

  (And maybe you never will.)

  He’s not smiling. He’s just watching her, cold.

  It’s unsettling.

  “What are you doing?” he asks her again.

  (It’s weird to see Brandon without Evan, too. Weird to think of him as a separate entity when he’s usually just one half of the clown posse, or at best Warden’s minion. It’s weird to see Brandon thinking for himself.)

  (It’s scary to imagine what he might be thinking about.)

  “I had to pee,” Dawn says, weakly. But there’s no point in pretending anymore; Brandon can see Alex’s body. “Alex is dead,” she says.

  Brandon doesn’t react. He doesn’t react, and his nonreaction is scarier than anything else.

  “That sucks,” he says.

  “Yeah,” Dawn replies.

  “No, I mean it sucks that you found him. That’s a real fucking trip.”

  He looks at her for a long time. Finally, he squares his shoulders and seems to decide something.

  But whatever it is, it’ll have to wait. Because it’s at that moment the rest of the Pack emerges from the forest.

  WARDEN LEADS the rest of the Pack into the clearing at the base of the cliff.

  (Before anyone else in the Pack can see, and while Brandon’s turned away to greet Warden, Dawn kicks snow over Alex’s body.)

  (She has her reasons.)

  “What the hell’s going on?” Warden asks Brandon and Dawn. “We’re wasting time here, you guys. We need to keep moving.”

  “She found Alex,” Brandon says before Dawn can say anything.

  Dawn steps to one side, revealing what’s still visible of Alex’s body. “Yeah,” she says, “I did.”

  Kyla gasps. Lucas swears. Brielle shakes her head and leans closer. Frowns as she studies the body.

  “Holy shit,” Warden says. He rushes across the clearing to Dawn. Takes her hands. “Dawn, I’m so sorry.”

  Why? Dawn thinks. I’m not dead.

  Lucas rubs his face. Looks up the cliff wall. “I don’t get it,” he says. “How did he end up all the way down here?”

  “He must have gotten lost,” Evan says. “He left early this morning. Probably he just went the wrong way and just tumbled.”

  The rest of the Pack nods, and stares down at the body. It’s as good an explanation as anything they’re going to get.

  Only Brandon doesn’t react. He doesn’t take his eyes away from Dawn.

  (And Dawn’s getting a creepy feeling, and, reader, you know why she’s getting a creepy feeling.)

  (And you know she’s probably right.)

  “This doesn’t change anything,” Warden says. “It’s sad to say, and it’s shitty for Alex, but we can’t let this slow us down.”

  The Pack gathers around him, and it’s clear Warden is the Leader and they’re all looking at him to tell them what comes next.

  “But what about Amber?” Dawn asks. “Now we know there’s no rescue coming.”

  Warden takes her hand. “There’s still a rescue,” he tells her. “When we get to the highway tomorrow we’ll flag someone down. We’ll tell them Amber and Christian are still out here. If we hurry, we can get a helicopter to her before dark.”

  Dawn looks around at the rest of the group. Nobody’s looking at anyone else.

  Except Brandon is still watching Dawn.

  Meanwhile, Lucas is still stealing glances at Alex’s body, then gazing up the side of the cliff and frowning. “But what was Alex doing on this side of the mountain?” he says. “This cliff is nowhere near the trail down from the tarn.”

  Warden shifts, impatiently.

  “It doesn’t matter,” he says. “We’re probably never going to know. What matters now is that we have to keep moving.”

  SO THEY KEEP MOVING.

  It doesn’t feel good, but like Warden says, there’s nothing they can do for Alex now. So they shoulder their packs. They fall in behind Warden. They follow the trench east, away from the trail.

  And Dawn doesn’t tell a soul about how Alex was
stabbed.

  She figures it’s safer for everyone if nobody knows that she knows someone in the group murdered Alex. That it was probably Brandon or Evan.

  She knows if she starts pointing fingers and raising a fuss, well, feelings are bound to get hurt. Lines will be drawn. The whole “getting out of the forest alive” situation will get a little more complicated.

  Dawn figures there will be time when they get to the highway to sort through the question of who murdered Alex.

  In the meantime, she just wants to survive.

  So she keeps her mouth shut.

  Doesn’t tell a soul.

  (Not even Lucas.)

  “I JUST DON’T LIKE IT,” Lucas tells Dawn, as they hike.

  They’re still below the tree line, steadily dropping altitude. In the distance, Dawn can see the river toward which Warden is leading them.

  The river that leads to the highway.

  It’s late afternoon now. The sky’s getting darker. Sooner or later, they’re going to have to make camp, but Warden keeps pushing them. Chewing up distance.

  Warden’s in a hurry, and the whole Pack is struggling to keep up.

  “I keep thinking about Alex,” Lucas says. They’re a ways back from everyone else; nobody can hear them. “Like, how does it make sense that he fell off that cliff?”

  Dawn shrugs. “Evan is probably right,” she says. “He just got lost in the dark and went in the wrong direction.”

  “You’d have to be pretty stupid to mess up that badly,” Lucas replies. “Do you really believe that?”

  Dawn says nothing. Keeps hiking. Aware of Lucas’s eyes on her.

  “No,” Lucas says. “You don’t.” He pauses. “You’re just too scared to admit it.”

  (He’s right.)

  (Dawn’s freaking terrified.)

  Before she can say anything, though, someone screams from the trail up ahead.

  And Lucas and Dawn glance at each other, and then they start running.

  KYLA SITS IN THE SNOW in the middle of the forest. She’s clutching her ankle.

  She’s crying.

  “I freaking hate nature,” she says.

  She tries to stand, and she can’t. Not even with Warden’s help.

  (“Stepped on a root or something,” Warden explains to Dawn. “She twisted her ankle. I don’t think it’s broken.”)

  Broken or not, Kyla isn’t walking any farther tonight.

  The Pack will have to make camp.

  They find a bit of a clearing to set up their tents. It’s not big enough for everyone; Lucas takes one look at where Warden’s setting up, and he disappears through some trees to another patch of flat ground.

  Brielle sets up her tent somewhere out of sight, too.

  It’s nearly dark by the time they get everything unpacked and the water boiling for dinner. Dawn’s tired and cold and hungry, and she knows Warden’s waiting for her to move her stuff into his tent and it will be warm in there and she can rest for a while, but something’s holding her back.

  “What’s up?” Warden asks as he watches Dawn unroll her tarp and look around for a couple of suitable trees. “You know you can crash with me again. I promise I won’t try anything.”

  Dawn can’t meet his eyes. “It’s not that,” she says.

  “Then what?”

  Dawn doesn’t answer. Wonders if she should tell Warden about what she saw, what she’s afraid of. Wonders what he would do if he knew Brandon or Evan was a killer.

  “Dawn,” Warden says. He takes hold of her shoulders and turns those green eyes on her. “You know you can talk to me, right?”

  Dawn’s certain that line works on most girls.

  (With those eyes? Dynamite.)

  It might work on her, too, in a different situation.

  But Dawn has trust issues at this point in time. She’s not sure who she trusts or what she believes. So Warden’s magnet eyes don’t quite captivate her; she gazes down at her feet first, and then at Warden’s tent, and he’s left the flap open in his haste to reassure her, and Dawn can see inside, see his pile of Polar Bear clothes and his nice camping backpack, and the nice headlamp and camp stove he must have earned while he was in the program.

  And there’s something else in there, too. Something bright and shiny, and it catches the light from Dawn’s headlamp and gleams back at her. And Dawn can’t figure out what it is at first, and then she does and it all comes together, and suddenly she’s more scared than she’s ever been before in her life.

  IT’S THE KNIFE. Christian’s knife.

  That’s what’s in Warden’s tent. The knife that Christian should still be holding on to, way up high near the top of the Raven’s Claw.

  The knife that is the Pack’s only weapon. That probably murdered Alex.

  The knife is in Warden’s tent.

  Alex was stabbed to death.

  What the actual fuck?

  IT’S SUDDENLY VERY COLD where Dawn is standing. And no sweater, no sleeping bag, no roaring fire can change that. Dawn is suddenly very aware of how alone she is here in the clearing, even with Warden and the others nearby.

  “Dawn?” Warden says again.

  He shifts his position a little, turns to follow her gaze, and Dawn looks quickly away from Warden’s tent and prays he doesn’t realize she’s seen the knife.

  Her thoughts are racing.

  She can’t figure it out.

  Did Warden kill Alex?

  And if Warden has Christian’s knife…what happened to Christian?

  Dawn forces herself to meet Warden’s eyes. “Thanks so much for the offer,” she tells him, smiling. “It’s really kind of you, but I think I’ll just sleep somewhere else tonight.”

  Warden blinks.

  Then his eyes narrow.

  (For a heart-stopping moment, Dawn imagines that he can read her mind, that he knows she knows.)

  But instead, Warden just shrugs. “Suit yourself.”

  * * *

  So Dawn sleeps in Kyla’s tent that night. But Dawn can’t sleep.

  The wind is picking up again. Dawn lies awake and listens to it blow and hears the first spatter of rain against the thin tent material.

  She can’t sleep because she’s afraid if she sleeps that whoever killed Alex will sneak up and surprise her.

  Dawn is scared.

  She’s scared of the night, and she’s scared of what might happen in the morning.

  She’s scared of what the knife in Warden’s tent means. She’s scared it means he, not Brandon or Evan, murdered Alex.

  She’s scared because she’s trusting Warden to get them out of here. And she’s scared because he might not be who she thinks he is.

  She’s scared nobody will believe her if she tells them.

  She’s scared that even if Warden isn’t a killer he’ll still get them lost, that another storm will kick up and Warden’s memory will fail him, or the map he remembers will be wrong, and they’ll all of them die out here in the wilderness.

  She’s scared that Amber’s still alive and they’re leaving her to die.

  But what scares Dawn most of all is knowing how easily she could forget about all of it. Knowing she could just walk away.

  She doesn’t want to. She knows it’s not right that Alex is dead. That Amber is probably dying, if she isn’t dead already.

  That Christian is alone on the top of the Raven’s Claw.

  (If he isn’t dead already, too.)

  Dawn knows a strong, good-hearted person would find a way to fight for the truth and for justice and whatever other words sound like solid unmovable mountains when you’re snug in your bed but seem like bullshit when you’re camping in a blizzard with murderers.

  Dawn knows she should fight harder, for Alex and Amber and even for Christian.
<
br />   But she knows in the morning there’s a fair chance she’ll pack up with the rest of the group and set off down the trail after Warden and not say anything and maybe never say anything.

  She’s tired and she’s hungry and scared, and she knows there’s an easy way out.

  If she keeps her mouth shut, she doesn’t have to be so scared.

  IT’S HER DAD WHO CONVINCES HER.

  Now, Dawn doesn’t believe in ghosts. And the ghost of her dad doesn’t visit her in Kyla’s tent. Not, like, in a spiritual form. But as Dawn lies awake listening to the rain fall, she’s thinking about her dad anyway.

  Dawn’s dad was a good man. He was kind and funny and generous. He was an accountant and he worked a lot, but he always made time to hang out with his children.

  Help Dawn with her homework.

  Take Dawn and Bryce out for ice cream on hot summer nights.

  Watch movies.

  Take walks.

  He was a good dad, and he loved his kids. And he was always trying to teach them about Doing the Right Thing. Doing the Right Thing was important to Dawn’s dad. It was a big sticking point.

  Find someone’s wallet on the ground? Give it back to them.

  Make a mistake? Own up to it.

  “Even if it’s not the easiest path,” he’d tell Dawn and Bryce, “do it anyway. In the long run, you’ll be rewarded.”

  Dawn’s dad was all about Doing the Right Thing.

  (Of course, in the end, it was Doing the Right Thing that got Dawn’s dad killed, but never mind that for a moment.)

  Dawn knows that leaving Amber and Christian to die on the mountain is not the Right Thing to Do. She knows that letting one of the Pack members get away with murdering Alex is not the Right Thing, either.

  She knows, as painful as it is to admit it, that following the Pack out to the highway and bailing for Chicago to see Nana is not the Right Thing. Not when Amber’s still out there and she might be alive.