Our Flower

by S M Matthews

  With a couple of scans of her the tailor was able to produce some pretty accurate measurements of her. The obvious route seemed to be to get some uniforms adjusted. I just went for it and got three done for now.

  I collect them and move on to medical, it’s nice being able to go in and out without the suit. Unfortunately, this has created another worry for my brothers and I which we seem to discuss again and again every time we see each other. She smells absolutely amazing, if you can get past the thick, cloying overlay of depression.

  POPPY

  It’s one of them at the door; I sort of half watch for them now. At first, I thought it was the same...person. But after a couple of visits without the suits on I don’t know how I ever could ever have thought that. There are quite clearly three of them. The door slides open and I try not to react, I am excited though. They usually have something for me. I am always most excited to see Doughnut, he usually brings me good food.

  It’s Pretty Nose, and he’s carrying something that he puts on the bed. They know now not to approach, so they just put things down for me. They’ve never pushed the subject but...I’m just not sure, so if they do come too close I just back away. I curl up on the chair and watch him potter around; he tidies a little. There’s not a lot to tidy, it just seems to be what he does whilst he growls away at me. If the bed isn’t perfectly straight, he’ll remake it. If he thinks I’ve had the same glass and jug for too long, he will take them and come back with new ones. He’s probably the most thoughtful of the three in that way. He sits on the end of the bed and ruffles his mane; thinking. They have the grey freckles on their faces, and it darkens towards their mane and ears. Large pointed ears stick up and out and seem to be hugely manoeuvrable. They end in little tufts. The spotting comes together on their...paws too. What I would think of as hands and feet are a solid grey which starts to give way to the spotting about half way up their forearms. I only see this when they have their sleeves rolled up. Their hands are like ours, but their fingers appear to have one joint less. They end in wicked-looking fixed black claws. Their eyes are like a domestic cat’s, slitted pupils in an orange and gold iris. Their eyes are beautiful.

  ACER

  As expected, she didn’t even attempt to investigate the uniforms whilst I was there; but as soon as I was out the door, she was up. It feels wrong, spying with the glass frosted but...I want to know that she likes them. That she knows they are from us. She goes and gets changed almost immediately and it gives me a

  self-satisfied grin. I am approached by Medical Officer Anat; we have gotten to know the brothers better since we have started visiting medical so regularly.

  We greet each other, and he informs me he believes the subject is well. They have had the quarantine protocol disengaged for two full turns now.

  “With the commanders’ permission we would like to move her out of the quarantine suite and out of medical.”

  I rub at the bridge of my nose. “I will meet with my brothers later and discuss suitable accommodation. Do you have a time frame in mind?”

  “We’re happy for her to leave now; she still isn’t fitted with a translator but there doesn’t seem to be any point in putting her through it; she still hasn’t made any attempt to communicate.”

  I agree; it can always happen later should it need to.

  He nods his thanks and moves off again; I guess that’s all I’m getting.

  I message Titus; ‘shift change at home’.

  And then Micka; ‘you busy?’

  As it turns out Micka was just getting ready for bed, but waited for me to come home. We do a swift shift change. Nothing of note anyway. Maintenance are continuing with the water. Light’s fixed in the docking bay. Hydroponics have come up with some temporary self-circulating thing for when maintenance gets to them. Research have put in a request to deploy a solar sail; actual schematics to follow.

  “They want to move her out of medical.” It’s my last item of business.

  Titus shrugs as if it is obvious, “We have room.”

  “And we are the only ones she knows at all so far. She does always seem to smell a little anticipatory when I go in.” Micka adds. Titus and I both nod in agreement.

  I can’t help the grin, “I was hoping you’d both say something like that.”

  “What about the...you know...” Titus wafts his paw in front of his nose.

  “Wear looser trousers” Micka delivers, utterly deadpan. Titus bursts out laughter and I can’t help but chuff too.

  Micka shrugs, “Unless you have any better ideas I don’t see what else we can do. I am sure we will get used to it. It might even die down.”

  I don’t think any of us believe that for a second.

  “So when are they discharging her?”

  “I spoke to Anat earlier; whenever we are ready. She should be going to sleep soon though, so maybe we could get her at the start of next shift?”

  We agree, it gives me time to make her room a little more comfortable, it means she can have a full day here with Micka and a bit of time with Titus to get used to it.

  All three of us can make ourselves available to go and get her.

  POPPY

  I knew – I was pretty sure – that in theory, there were three of them. I was sure enough, I’d thought. I’d identified enough differences between them that there are three. But I’ve never actually seen them more than one at a time, so up to this point, I could have been mistaken.

  I was definitely not mistaken. There are three of them. And all stood in a line, in my living room, they are imposing.

  When there’s just one of them perched on the bed, that was just sort of...acceptable. Now, it’s overwhelming. I stand at the back of the room and watch them move about; they are packing my things. They all move about each other naturally, talking amongst themselves. Very relaxed, very calm and friendly. Very ‘isn’t this nice...now if we can all just get along...’. It was that cadence of speech.

  To say that I’m worried is an understatement, they could be taking me literally anywhere. There’s a lot going on in front of me...I mean just the tails alone are so hard to keep track of. Six tails, all moving randomly, all attached to what looks like 7 foot of furry, uniformed, broad muscle is...a lot.

  One at a time is now pretty tame I realise. And I had never once thought of this space as being particularly small, but it feels tight now...there’s a lot of...them.

  Between them they’ve cleaned out my few things and they gesture for me to follow. The idea that I wasn’t just going to live in here forever was already half formed with me; when the glass isn’t frosted, I watch what’s happening out there. I know that this is a hospital. I’m also pretty sure that they all come in threes. I’ve also seen a few bright white ones. Smaller and more delicate looking; I’ve taken these to be the females.

  I willingly follow along, not seeing I have much of a choice. Dark Tips leads the way, Doughnut and Pretty Nose flank me. They carry my things between them, and we leave the hospital. I look back, my room is like its own smaller bit in the corner of the larger facility, and uniformed staff are already moving in to...get it ready for the next time it’s needed, I guess. One of the passing medical staff sees me...he smiles and waves. I actually find myself reflexively doing the same. I do feel like I’ve lived here for a while, but now I think I never paid enough attention to really take in what the staff were doing outside my window.

  Huh.

  I shrug and follow on. Out the door and to the end of the hall is...big. It’s really big. I have to crane my head right back to see the ‘ceiling’ through the walkways. The people moving around furthest away look tiny. There are walkways stacked upon walkways. Gigantic windows. What looks like traders and shops and food sellers...and a lot of people just going about their day. The sudden noise of it all hits me, like a wave coming in. I don’t like it; there's a lot to process after my time in a quiet room and as amazing as it is, I want to get out of here.

  I’m glad the three of them are s
urrounding me, and when I look up to them they move off without hesitation. I follow them, I’m barefoot like they are, but everywhere is carpeted.

  Once we are in a quieter area I start to note the details around me. Like how massively wide the halls are. There are doors at regular intervals, and I think this must be where people live. We keep walking. It sounds ridiculous but this is the furthest I’ve walked in ages and I can really feel it in my legs. It feels good though. To finally get moving a little.

  At one point we pass a gently humming drone, it’s maybe three feet tall and has a light softly glowing on top. It moves along happily and…I think it’s hoovering. Makes sense, there’s a lot of ground to cover.

  Every single corridor looks exactly the same, and it isn’t long before I am beyond lost. Nevertheless, we eventually hit a doorway that they stop at. Dark Tips places his hand on a plate next to the door and it opens. He starts to move again but then stops; he says something aloud in his growly voice. There’s a chirrup and the hand-plate turns green. Doughnut speaks, followed by Pretty Nose. There’s another chirrup. Dark Tips looks down at me and then points to the scanner. It takes a moment and another gesture, but then I get it, and I lay my hand on the scanner. It turns blue for maybe 10 seconds, chirruping the whole time, and then turns green again.

  We go in. I think I’ve just been given a key.

  They show me to a room, and then carefully unpack my few things onto the bed. I guess I’m staying here for a bit. When I don’t make a move, Pretty Nose puts my spare folded uniforms in a drawer, and then does the follow gesture. We cross the lounge and I have to make a concerted effort to follow him and not get stuck staring out the giant window. The giant window revealing an absolutely breath-taking view of space.

  The next room we go into is the bathroom. He makes sure I’m watching as he pops my toothbrush in a holder on the sink. There’s already three there, neatly lined up. He puts my ‘soap’ in a dish on a shelf near the shower. Similarly, there are three lined up in neat little dishes there too. There is the biggest bath I have ever seen.

  It’s mostly sunk into the floor, and I think I’d have to do a little swim to make it across the middle. One wall has shelves with odd bits of clothes on and what looks like a laundry basket in the corner.

  We go back out to the big room. The follow gesture again; and I am led so that we all sit together around the island in the kitchen. Meals are already laid out and we all eat together. We are sat in silence, and I’m trying to watch them without making it obvious. All three of them are being pretty blatant about watching me though.

  It feels sort of awkward, but it’s that awkwardness you have when you meet your boyfriends mum for the first time, or when you're in a new class and the teacher insists on doing ‘Now we will go round and everyone tell us a little about themselves...’

  It’s pretty terrible right now, but you know it’ll go away. It’s just that no one’s sure of each other yet. That’s if I’m here for very long. I realise I’m making a pretty big assumption. I push the thought away. No point worrying over something I have absolutely no control over.

  ACER

  The ‘follow’ gesture seems to be the only thing she will engage with, and it feels like she’s not exactly willing with even that. She’s lived with us for all of a single turn, and she smells so sad and lonely...we just don’t know what to do for her. She certainly can’t spend the rest of her existence moping on a lounge chair. I decide to take her for a walk, see if it gets anything out of her. To see if, even momentarily, the oppressive smell of her sadness will lift. It has been better since she moved out of medical; but I had hoped that would be the case. The suite in medical, although more than serviceable, was little more than a prison. Underneath the smell of sadness, is the constant sweet smell she has.

  Titus says she doesn’t actually smell like sweet food; she smells like the feeling you have when you’re pressing your face against the window looking at all that you could have. I get exactly what he means; I think he’s hit the fish without even looking.

  She follows me, her head is down but I know she’s peeking though that wall of fur she has.

  Such odd fur; lots of it growing out of the top of her head, and then two odd tufts on her face.

  We walk past the shop windows and although she is distracted and her interest is piqued, she’s anxious. It’s a busy area of the station and she stands as close as she can to me, whilst somehow simultaneously trying not to be close to me at all. Just closer to me than the next nearest passing stranger. Her anxiety is slowly increasing and although I know she wants to look, I don’t know how to help her. We move on. Whenever we pass a window to the outside it openly holds her attention. I’ve seen the view, I’ve seen the view every turn for cycles and it has never tarnished. Even so, watching her be taken in by it at every opportunity breathes a freshness back into it that I hadn’t even realised I’d lost. We have a large window in our quarters and every time she’s not actively been doing something else...she’s been staring out of it.

  I head for Hydroponics. Not just anyone can enter; commanding officers, Hydroponics staff and maintenance are the only crew with automatic access. The health of Hydroponics is important to the station, possibly one of the most important areas. It contributes to the diet of the station and the health and cleanliness of the air. The general wellbeing of the whole station is improved by the sheer size of our Hydroponics facility. We are lucky to have it. The team that manages it is a large one, and between the gardeners, the engineers, the researchers...it’s busy.

  I have to provide a print scan to get in; there are many entrances to hydroponics and it sprawls over a couple of levels. This is just the closest door to home.

  I make my way through, seeking out one of the gardening team. I don’t get very far before I realise she’s not following me anymore. I find her again quickly, neither of us have gone far, but I stand and watch her gawk.

  She’s pushed her fur back, it’s completely off her face for the first time since...well, since I’ve seen her. She hunkers down next to a vegetable patch and hovers a hand over some leaves before thinking better of it and pulling it back. She stands and moves onto the next thing, and now I’m trailing behind her, she seems to have completely forgotten I even exist.

  She doesn’t seem to want to miss a single thing, and is openly fascinated by everything. Examining things grown in vertical pockets as well as the suspended troughs and tiny things being grown on shelves, their roots hanging into a supply of running water.

  Not a single available bit of space is wasted in Hydroponics, and I think it is a testament to the ingenuity of the staff there. The Little One certainly seems to be appreciative of it. Her smell has changed dramatically, through excited and into relaxed contentment.

  The staff are watching our slow progress, and I wonder what they would think if I requested a plot to set her up to live in.

  Like my mind had finally been sucked into The Void, I should think.

  I lose all track of time, but we are eventually approached by one of the head gardeners. An older male, his grey fur starting to whiten with age.

  The Little One doesn’t seem to pay much attention to our brief conversation. Neither does the old gardener, come to that. We really haven't cultivated the relationships with the staff team that we should have, and I reprimand myself again for that. We’ve kept the station ticking over...but we haven't had the hearts for it.

  I explain to him that she’s an unknown species, that she’s anxious, that she doesn’t speak. The older male doesn’t seem in the slightest bothered by any of this. If anything, he’s so dismissive of me he’s pushing rude. He simply hunkers down next to her like it’s the most natural thing in the world, and pulls a tool out of his belt which he holds out to her. She hesitates, but it’s marginal. He doesn’t even try to speak to her. He shows her how they turn the soil and remove unwanted tendrils. They move to another bed and she helps him trimming the lower leaves off stalks. He hands he
r a hose and gestures at a few beds before leaving. Returning a short while later to show her how to turn off the supply and store the hose. He shows her the automated sprinklers and a sensor embedded into the soil. She nods enthusiastically. She trails around after him, and I trail around after her. I see a side to her I hadn’t even suspected existed. She’s bright, enthusiastic, and seemingly desperate for activity.

  I don’t think I’d have guessed this though.

  The old male approaches me with her in tow, “Is she coming back?”

  I hadn’t even thought about it, she’s watching me. Her eyes are bright, boring into me. She’s really looking at me. She’s desperate, I think.

  I nod, “Yes, second shift again, if that’s acceptable to your team?”

  He nods, then as he’s leaving calls, “Get her some gloves...and cover her feet!”

  POPPY

  I hadn’t wanted to leave the gardens...but I couldn’t exactly just stay there either. And I was getting rather hungry.

  I go about my evening routine with a spring in my step. I’m going back tomorrow, come hell or high water. I have something to do, something normal. Something I understand and feel familiar with.

  It’s suddenly a life raft for my sanity.

  I lie awake a while in bed, thinking again and again about the day. I liked the...person who had been showing me the ropes. He hadn’t pushed, he hadn’t even tried to speak to me really. He just let me get on with it. Exactly what I needed.

  I haven't done anything particularly physical for a while, but I am enjoying the bit of muscle ache I have. Today was real. I got to do real, useful things.

  I contributed.

  For the first time, someone wakes me in the morning. In the dimness I think it’s Dark Tips, but I’m not sure. Yesterday I just came out when I was ready, not really having had an exact sleep schedule for the whole time I was in the hospital.