Bear to Want: Kodiak Den #1 (Alaskan Den Men)

by Amy Lamont

  The fierce possessiveness coloring his voice told me every word he spoke was the truth. He’d wanted me all these years. He’d waited for me. And he was done waiting.

  What did that mean to my plans? Could I forget about moving away from Kodiak? Forget about attending college and building a life of my own away from anyone who ever met my mother?

  “Why didn’t you leave here when your mother did?”

  Kaden’s voice surprised me, shaking me from my thoughts.

  “What?”

  “I knew you wanted to leave Kodiak, go to school. I’m surprised you didn’t leave with your mother. I figured you’d head off to college the minute you graduated high school. I thought that was why you worked at Sheila’s all through school. And worked two jobs every summer.”

  He really did pay attention to me back then. How had I been so oblivious?

  “That was my plan,” I told him. “Graduate and get the heck out of here. I got into every school I applied to and even had a few scholarship offers. But not enough to cover my full expenses.”

  He drew his brows together. “You hadn’t saved enough to cover at least some of the difference?”

  I nodded. “Oh, yeah, I had quite a bit saved up. With a few loans, I would have had my pick of colleges.”

  “So, what happened?”

  I shook my head and pressed my lips together, pulling in a shuddering breath before I responded. “The thing that happened to ruin my life was the same thing that always happened—my mother. I didn’t go with her when she left Kodiak because she didn’t invite me. Probably because if I knew her plans, I would have kept closer watch on my savings.”

  His body got very still beneath me. “What?”

  “She figured out my password for my online banking. She somehow managed to move all my money into an account I didn’t have access to. And the day I figured it out, I came home to find our house empty. She’d taken all my money except for what was in my pockets and every bit of furniture and stuff from our house.”

  The painful memories welled up inside me. I had been sixteen, my seventeenth birthday less than a month away. I had everything I ever wanted within my grasp. I’d worked my ass off to make sure of it.

  But then in one fell swoop, my mother left, taking all my dreams with her. Living in that house for the next month, no furniture, no food in the cupboards, trying to scrape enough money together to rent a tiny apartment without letting my grades slip, had been one of the worst months of my life.

  “I’ll kill her.”

  I turned startled eyes up to Kaden. His face looked fierce in a whole new way. I had no doubt in my mind that he’d indeed be tempted to kill my mother if she presented herself.

  And as bizarre as it seemed, the knowledge that he was so angry on my behalf settled something deep inside me. I slid my arms around his waist and gave him a squeeze, laying my head over his heart.

  “It’s okay, Kaden. I was better off without her. And I managed to take care of myself.”

  His arms closed in a tight hug around me and he rested his cheek against the top of my head. “I’m so sorry, Alyssa. I should have been here. I should have checked up on you. You shouldn’t have been alone here struggling all these years. I thought I was doing the right thing, giving you the space to grow up and go to school. I’m just grateful you were still here when I got out of the Army. You could have gone anywhere to start over and save for college.”

  His words hit me like a sledgehammer. Holy smokes. Why hadn’t I thought of that? I’d had to save up money to rent this apartment. But I could just have easily packed my stuff and moved somewhere else. I didn’t even need to go too far. I could have gone to Fairbanks. The city was big enough I could have avoided anyone who knew my mother, knew about my past.

  But I hadn’t. I stayed right here in Kodiak. The place I swore I hated. The place I dreamed of escaping for years. Why hadn’t leaving long before now ever occurred to me?

  The moment I had that thought, visions of Kaden danced through my mind. From the time I hit puberty, anytime I ran into him around town, even at a distance, my body reacted to him. I’d been so fearful of turning into my mother, it hadn’t even crossed my mind that I had real feelings for him. Or that the attraction could be mutual.

  “I’m so sorry.” Kaden kissed the top of my head, dragging me from my revelations.

  Oh, no. There’s no way he was taking the fall for my mother’s actions. I yanked out his arms and sat up straight on his lap. “You aren’t to blame, Kaden.”

  He shook his head. “I wasn’t to blame for your mother’s actions, but I should have been taking care of you since then.”

  “You weren’t responsible for me.”

  “Sweetheart, I was. I have been since that day seven years ago when I realized you were my mate. The woman who would own my heart the rest of my life. I should have done a better job taking care of you.”

  I fought for breath. “Own your heart?”

  He ran the backs of his fingers over my cheek. “Yeah, baby. It’s always been yours.”

  Something cracked open inside my chest and I face planted in his neck as tears sprang to my eyes. “You love me.”

  He cuddled me closer and chuckled into my hair. “She’s finally getting it. Though, love doesn’t seem the right word to cover all the things I feel for you.”

  I sat up and stared at him, blinking away the tears blurring my vision. I studied each of his features. And I could see the truth of his words.

  And as I continued to look at him, his expression wide open and showing me all he felt, something happened. All the wounds inside me—the little cuts and the deep lacerations; all the scars left behind by my mother’s actions and living in a town where I felt like an outcast—all of them began to mend. I could almost feel it as the pieces were stitched together until I was whole again.

  And with the healing came knowledge. “I love you, Kaden. I think some part of me always knew I loved you. I think part of the reason I wanted to run away so badly is I knew I’d have to live here knowing I could never have you.”

  He leaned into my until his mouth was mouth hovered over mine. “You have me, Alyssa. You’ve always had me.”

  And then he kissed me. I returned it, finding this time it was my turn to be fierce and demanding.

  Chapter 12

  Alyssa

  Kaden didn’t allow the kiss to go on for long. He tore his mouth from mine and stood in one motion.

  Startled as my feet hit the floor, I worked to gain my balance.

  “Kaden? What..?”

  His answer was to grab my hand. He tugged me to the bed. I fully expected to find myself stripped naked and on my back in seconds.

  But instead he dropped my hand and flipped the top of my suitcase over, zipping it closed with everything I’d managed to pack inside.

  “We’ll come back for the rest of your stuff later.” He leaned down and kissed me hard and close-lipped. “Much later.”

  Before I had a chance to respond, he snatched up my hand again and grabbed the suitcase and maneuvered toward the door. In less than a minute, I found myself and my suitcase planted in Kaden’s truck and we were on the road.

  “What are we doing?”

  Kaden turned his head and gave me a quick smile. He lifted my hand to his mouth and planted a warm kiss on my knuckles. “Going home, sweetheart. I promised myself the next time I had you, it would be in our home, in our bed. So that’s where I’m taking you, and that’s what we’re doing”

  Well, okay then.

  I turned my head and grinned like a lunatic out the passenger side window.

  And Kaden was as good as his word. Five minutes after he pulled his truck up in front is his house—our house—he had me naked, on my hands and knees, my ass turned up to him, in our bed.

  “Tell me you love me again, Alyssa.”

  “I love you, Kaden. More than anything.”

  He rewarded me by pushing himself inside me to the hilt. I shifted my sho
ulders to the bed, raising my ass higher. I felt him go deeper, so deep inside me, I lost track of where he ended and I began.

  He leaned forward over my back and reached beneath me, cupping a breast in his warm palm. His fingers plucked and rolled my over-sensitized nipple at the same time he began to move inside me.

  A long, low moan was pulled from me and Kaden responded with an answering growl. He sat up on his knees behind me and braced himself with his hands on my hips and began to thrust in earnest.

  I clutched the sheets beside my head and held on tight as each push and pull of his long, hard length sent pleasure spiraling through me.

  “Your pussy was made for me, sweetheart.” He used his grip on my hips to drive me back and forth on him. And I didn’t think I could take much more.

  But more is exactly what Kaden had in store for me. One hand slid down my hip and around. His fingers found the small nub hidden at the top of my wet folds, and he rubbed in time with the rhythmic motions of his pounding thrusts.

  “Oh, God, Kaden.”

  “Easy, baby. I’ve got you.” His fingers kept up their movements and his hips picked up speed.

  I buried my face in the fluffy pillow and cried out my pleasure as he pushed me right up to the edge and then over it. My orgasm rolled over me in pulsing waves of white-hot pleasure. And before I could come all the way down again, Kaden gripped my hips once more and pushed me right back up the hill as he drove himself deep inside me again and again, leaving me desperate to go over.

  “Come for me, sweetheart. I want to feel your tight pussy clenching on my dick one more time.”

  His words, along with the pounding of his cock so deep inside my sex, had exactly the effect he wanted. My pussy clenched down on him, squeezing and dragging him right along over the edge with me.

  His hips jerked erratically as pleasure throbbed through my body in time with the beating of my heart. I rode out the sensations as I felt him spill himself inside me, growling out my name as he leaned down and sank his teeth into the sensitive tendons of my shoulder. The intermingling of pleasure and pain sent another round of spasms through my body.

  Aftershocks were still shivering through me when Kaden collapsed over me, taking us both down to the mattress. He trailed kisses up my shoulder, from the spot where he’d marked me with his teeth, up over my neck to right beside my ear.

  “You’re mine, Alyssa. I’m never letting you go.”

  “Good,” I said and I meant it. I snuggled back into him and a sense of safety and security rolled over me and I realized it was the first time in my entire life I’d felt that way—cared for and loved and protected.

  “You’ll take the job? Get your degree online? I don’t want you to feel like you’re giving anything up.”

  Warmth curled through me and I smiled into the pillow. “Yes. I’ll take the job. And I’ll get my degree.”

  “And you’ll stay here with me. We’ll build a home together. A life.”

  I twisted my head so I could look at him over my shoulder. It didn’t escape my notice that the words he uttered weren’t a question. I answered him anyway, turning in his arms as I did so.

  “Yes, Kaden. I’ll stay here with you. We’ll build a home together. A life.”

  He cupped my head in his hands and leaned down and kissed me with a gentle sweetness I felt all the way to my soul.

  “A family,” he whispered against my lips.

  And with those two simple words, everything I ever wanted was handed to me.

  I raised my gaze to his and saw his brown eyes were swirled with gold—the perfect blend of man and beast. And as I stared up at him, I made my vow.

  “We’ll build a home together. A life together. A family together. I’m giving you my heart to hold, Kaden Black.”

  He held me to him fiercely and pressed a kiss on my forehead.

  “My mate.”

  All my planning, and it was only when I gave up on it that I found everything I ever dreamed of.

  Finally.

  A Note From Amy

  Dear Reader,

  Thank you so much for reading Bear to Want!

  I have to admit, I hadn’t thought about writing a shifter romance until an author friend approached me to join the Alaskan Den Men Collection. But I’m so happy I did!

  Not only have I gotten to work with some truly amazing and talented authors, but I had so much fun playing in the world of the Kodiak Den werebears. I loved that Kaden knew exactly what he wanted right from the beginning—to claim Alyssa as his own—and was willing to fight to get her. I hope you love these two as much as I do!

  Truth be told, I fell hard for all my werebear heroes. I can’t wait to share Mason’s story with you in the next Kodiak Den story—Bear to Need. His mate is ready and willing to lead him on one wild chase!

  In the meantime, I hope you’ll keep in touch. To catch up on all the books in the Alaskan Den Men Collection, you can sign up for the ADM Newsletter here: Newsletter. And you can join the ADM Facebook fan group here: The Alaskan Denettes. We hope you’ll drop in to chat with the authors, share your favorite ADM moments, and more.

  For information about all of my books, sign up for my newsletter here: Newsletter or visit my website at www.amylamont.com. And you can join my Facebook readers’ group here: Amy Lamont’s Reading Room.

  And you can always drop me an email at amy@amylamont.com. I would love to hear from you!

  Happy Reading!

  Amy Lamont

  P.S. Keep reading for a full list of all eighteen books in the Alaskan Den Men series!

  The Complete Alaskan Den Men Collection

  Amy Lamont ~ Kodiak Den

  Book One: Bear to Want

  Book Two: Bear to Need

  Book Three: Bear to Love

  Andie Devaux ~ Hidden Den

  Book One: The Bear’s Accidental Mate

  Book Two: The Bear’s Accidental Date

  Book Three: The Bear’s Accidental Fate

  Jennifer Hilt ~ Icy Cap Den

  Book One: His to Bear

  Book Two: Mine to Bear

  Book Three: Theirs to Bear

  Kizzie Waller ~ Foxhollow Den

  Book One: Bearly Living

  Book Two: Bearly Loving

  Book Three: Bearly Gone

  Rebecca Thomas ~ Denali Den

  Book One: Beauty and the Bear

  Book Two: Wed to the Bear

  Book Three: Bound to the Bear

  Talina Perkins ~ Wylde Den

  Book One: Bear His Mark

  Book Two: Bear His Bond

  Book Three: Bear Their Secret

  To keep up with release dates and all the Alaskan Den Men news, be sure to visit us here: Alaskan Den Men!