I settled cross-legged into the cushions and reached behind my head to grasp one of the arrows from the invisible quiver slung across my back. I rolled it between my fingers and brushed the pad of my thumb against the shaft. When I’d picked up the bow for the first time and realized I was missing its quintessential counterpart I thought for a split second my search for and repair of the instrument had all been for nothing.
Imagine my surprise when I was able to pull a living gold-tipped arrow out of myself. It felt like the shaft was made of my own bones, and I couldn’t even begin to discern what type of otherworldly bird had supplied the fletching feathers.
Regardless, each time I’d seen the goddess had corresponded to the nocking of said arrows, so I fitted the one in my hand to string and hoped she wouldn’t disappoint me now, when I needed her more than ever.
Mercifully, the goddess shivered into being in front of me, mimicking my pose but without the hunched shoulders and maudlin expression. Her back was ramrod straight, each one of her pink-tipped blond hairs in perfect place, no tear-stained cheeks or raccoon eyes.
“It’s about time you decided to address me directly.” Shocking me, she spoke in a clear, articulate voice I wished was mine but knew from hearing myself on Terra’s home movies that it certainly wasn’t. “I’m getting bored in here; what’s the holdup?” Well, the attitude was definitely mine.
“I’m sorry you’re bored?” It came out more like a question than an apology, and my cheeks pinked in mortification. Could I be any lamer?
“We have enemies bearing down on us, and you’ve just been sitting around with your arrows up your ass letting it happen. We have a job to do; let’s get on with it!”
Yep, definitely my attitude.
“So how do we break Diana Diamond’s hold on Kin? How do we fix this?”
“Kin is just a distraction, the stakes are higher than that. Do you remember that couple from the street? I know you felt a greater purpose behind that match; a heightened sense of accomplishment, and the pushback from another force.”
I nodded, “Kin is more to me than just a distraction, but yes, of course, I remember.”
“We mated two souls that day—two souls our new nemesis didn’t want to be matched. Why do you think that is?”
I’d been contemplating the same question ever since I learned it was Diana Diamond’s wrath I'd felt that day, and the only answer I could come up with is that the pair was some sort of linchpin in the cosmic machine.
As if she read my mind, she answered, “Yes, exactly, you’re on the right track. You know what your problem is?” My goddess stopped and stared at me. Apparently, it was necessary for me to ask the stupid question.
“No, what?”
“You don’t trust your instincts, and you keep trying to make sense of something that defies human logic.”
Trust my instincts? Last time I did that, I got hoodwinked by my own mother. Talk about once burned, twice shy. “Well maybe if anyone ever thought to tell me anything, I’d know what the heck I’m supposed to be doing!”
“That’s a lame excuse you use when life gets tough, and now you’re using it to avoid taking control of your destiny. Answer the call when it comes, don't be a total idiot.”
“You mean that annoying music the stupid bow is always playing?”
“Yes, that stupid bow that opens hearts and fortifies love. You think you have enemies coming out of the woodwork and that you're the focus of their hatred, but you're not. Human hearts are the battlefield, and right now we’re not the only ones wrestling for control. Not everything in the world is about you, Lexi Balefire.”
No kidding. Who did she think I was, anyway? Some egotistical brat? Okay, maybe I was sometimes, but really, isn't everyone at times?
“And what about the rest of the world? Port Harbor is just one tiny town. Or are we living on some Hellmouth I don’t know about?”
She blew out a sigh. “This isn’t Sunnydale, smarty pants. But power attracts power, and we have a lot at our disposal. Or at least, we would if you suck it up, put on your big girl undies, and start doing your job. You saw what complacency leads to—do you want to be responsible for that?”
“Of course not. But what about Kin? Am I just supposed to give up on him?”
Goddess Lexi rolled her eyes and raised one eyebrow in a gesture so full of contempt I vowed to nix it from my own repertoire. If that old urban legend about your face getting stuck in one expression ever comes true, I don’t want to spend eternity looking bitchy.
“No, dummy. Can’t you see how screwing with the love life of the most powerful Fate Weaver ever born might be a good distraction? Obviously, your relationship with Kin is important—but you can't lose sight of the greater good while you throw the world’s most pathetic pity party. Trace the problem back to the source.”
“Oh.” Stellar comeback.
One final pointed look, and I was alone in the room once more. Unless you count a whole host of heavy new thoughts, anyway.
Chapter Seventeen
AFTER EVERYTHING I’D seen and heard, the cell phone jingling from my pocket suddenly seemed alien and inconsequential. I checked the screen, saw Serena’s number, and, vowing to call her back as soon as I had the opportunity, clicked ignore.
The Bow of Destiny had been blatting in my ear ever since, or maybe because Delta’s vision gift had come to an end, and no matter how vehemently I pleaded for a decrease in volume, it just got louder and louder until I had no choice but to submit and follow its pull. If the thing was this insistent, whoever required my services must be in dire need.
I straddled Bluebell thinking for the first time that maybe Flix was right and I should upgrade to a bigger bike. Maybe connecting to my innate power had also connected me more solidly to the earth’s energy, because that ride through the countryside with Delta had been more exhilarating than any night I’d ever spent on the streets of Port Harbor.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not about to buy myself a pair of hiking boots and a bird watching handbook or anything, but the clean, fresh country air had cleared the cobwebs from my brain, and I wouldn’t say no to a repeat performance.
For now, I found myself being drawn to one of the city’s main attractions—a mile-long strip of scenic views wending from the northern edge of the historic district, along the banks of the Piscatakeag River, to a boardwalk overlooking the Port Harbor estuary. Late November wind cut through my insufficient denim jacket, its bite stinging ever colder as I drove into the frigid ocean breeze.
Not many days left before snow forced Bluebell into her winter cocoon.
After stashing the scooter beneath a flickering street lamp, I hurried along, guided by the bow’s eardrum-popping volume and the pull in my belly. Ahead of me on the boardwalk, a potential couple stood out from the crowd. Or rather the disparate parts of a potential couple. Amid a chattering group waiting in line for a table at Banmai’s, I spotted a flutter of pink hovering in the air.
Nice, this would be an easy one. Fire an arrow, bing bang boom, done and dusted.
The cheery pink hearts signaled my quarry, and I was halfway toward calling up the carrier of the bow when I realized the symbol over the man's head was black, and the pink one hovered over another guy's head. Worse, Diana Diamond was bearing down from the opposite direction.
It appeared that destiny expected me to solidify some fates before she had the chance to interfere.
I didn’t need Captain Obvious to show up and dance around shouting the shiny pink guy was the better choice, but I took half a second to tune into Mr. Blackheart just to see what I could learn.
Nothing evil about him, just wrong for her—as if this woman choosing that man would lead to unhappiness and pain. Diana had already—possibly—doomed Kin and me to a similar fate, and if there was a way for me to prevent her from connecting with her next target, I’d do whatever it took.
I made a move to reach for my weapon and nearly fell over when my new nemesis showed me her
true form. I’d seen it before, but now Diana looked even scarier than she had before. High cheekbones slashed like razors beneath piercing dark eyes and a wicked smirk twisted blood-red lips. Dusky veins traced a pattern below the surface of skin so pale it was nearly translucent. Dark power encased her like a shroud.
I shivered.
She flicked fingers tipped with wickedly sharp nails painted to match her lips and drew a card from beneath her cloak. Bow song jangled in my head and the urge to shoot an arrow brought the goddess out with a rush of warrior energy that fired me up, too.
Diana—or that thing that had been Diana, once upon a time—faced me from the opposite side of the three targets as though we were two gunslingers in an old western movie. We both moved at the same time: me with my heart-tipped arrow promising a life filled with love and contentment; and she with her evil-infused square of gypsy-goddess magic carrying heartache and suffering.
In a rush of stomach-lurching speed, both card and arrow hurtled toward the woman and before I had time to process what had happened a shimmering version of Diana’s card rose to hover over the newly made couple like a map marker set squarely in the middle of a ring of seething shadow.
Dread stole into my throat, lodged there like a lump as my arrow bounced off the woman’s chest, fell to the ground, and dissipated with a hiss in a puff of swirling ether. She'd won and I had failed.
Time all but stopped for the next minute. Diana’s doing, I could only assume.
Sauntering unseen toward the newly made couple, Diana swiped her index finger through the black mist, captured a tiny bit of ebony on the tip, and in a manner I can only describe as sensual, slid the darkness between hungry lips to sample the flavor.
Ick. The heebies took it up to the level of skin-crawling disgust. And then, it got worse.
Hungry noises growled in Diana’s throat as she leaned forward and slurped up the inky pool. A slimy drop decorated her full bottom lip when she turned back toward me.
Her eyes were black with hate and fury and pure evil. Dark, ropy veins rose to the surface of her skin, pulsed and writhed like snakes as she became more...I wasn’t sure what she was becoming, actually. A demon? Something else? Whatever it was couldn’t be good, not with the way the mere vision of her chilled me to the bone.
Diana turned, let out a satisfied laugh, looked me square in the eye, raised her eyebrow in a silent challenge, and then disappeared as swiftly as my arrow had only moments before.
As much as I wanted to hate her, there was a part of me that understood how easy it had been for Diana to turn to the dark side. If it wasn’t for my Cupid-bestowed affinity for lovers—and the unwavering hope that accompanied it like the free sample of conditioner plexi-wrapped to bottles of shampoo—the loss of Kin might have had a similar effect on my psyche.
Left without hope, I might have allowed myself to fall into the deep well of wickedness or maybe let the goddess take my soul to a place where the pain no longer burned.
My shoulders slumped with the weight of epic failure, but as I turned to leave, I noticed the card Diana had flung, lying on the ground where the newly-formed couple had been.
Touching it held about as much appeal as poking a ticked-off snake with my finger, but I felt compelled to pick it up. The second my finger met the surface I knew I should have listened to my common sense.
Black mist billowed out of the card and spread over me like a cloud. When it cleared, I found my astral self standing in front of a wall-sized map pinned with nearly an entire deck similar to the one I now held. The center of each one was marked with a damp and darkened ring, and there were enough of them that it looked like she’d spread her hatred over a significant part of the world. Was that her goal? To blanket the world in a morass of discontent?
Was it some kind of cry for help or evidence of her inability to handle misery alone? A tiny part of me felt sorry for her, but not enough to show up at her office with wine and share a chick power moment.
Thankfully, I was in my own body this time—or at least a representation of it. Conjuring a bit of witchlight to augment and provide clarity, I watched the suits quiver and shift. Black diamonds, red spades, clubs turned to hearts in a blur of motion.
Before I had time to wonder what it all meant, Diana stepped into the room wearing her everyday face and carrying another card in her hand. The four of cups landed in the middle of the tabletop.
In the mythic deck, the suit of cups told a story of Psyche's relationship with Eros. The four depicted the moment when Psyche’s step-sisters used gossip and innuendo to send her down the wrong path in her marriage to Eros.
Eros. Cupid by another name. Dad seemed to be tied to everything annoying in my life lately.
The card represented a crossroads and the beginning of a betrayal. Eros had asked one thing of his new wife: that she never look upon his face. If she could do this one thing, their marriage would be happy and prosperous. In the blush of love, Psyche agreed until her meddling step-sisters filled her head with doubts and the temptation to look upon the face of her true love.
Overcome with an uncontrollable desire to do the one thing she shouldn’t, Psyche waited until Eros went to sleep and then took a peek thinking he’d never know the difference. She could not have been more wrong. Eros woke up, saw that his wife had betrayed his trust and walked away without a backward glance, leaving Psyche alone and scorned.
My dad. Good at cutting people out of his life. Just ask my half-brother who blamed me when it happened to his mother.
Family angst went out of my head when the vision sped up so fast it reminded me of those IMAX short movies with the roller coaster point of view. It is possible to suffer motion sickness when you are standing still. Crazy world
The next thing I knew, I was inside Diana’s skin. Again. This vision thing had once seemed like a blessing, I was beginning to rethink my position on that.
From her point of view, I watched our recent skirmish play out, the missile of her will flickering in her hand just before she winged it. I felt her greed, hate, passion, and under it all, pain. Oh, I might be well on my way to hating her with every fiber of my being, but I understood Diana better than she would ever understand me.
When I realized she was about to suck in the black aura of her misdeeds, I fought like a hellcat for release.
I won’t go into detail about the taste of darkness, other than to say it’s bitter and somehow seductive. When Diana turned away, my astral self stepped free and I noticed a card lying on the ground.
A Queen of diamonds. Appropriate given the name of the evil thing who’d thrown it, I suppose. As if being directed by something larger or more knowing, I felt compelled to step closer and saw the smiling Queen’s face flicker and shift. How odd.
Deliberately, I let my eyes go unfocused until I could make out red diamonds rapidly turning to black hearts. The Queen’s smile changed, too. From an enigmatic twist of the lips to something sinister and knowing.
Queen of the black hearts. Black hearts, the symbols of Diana’s dark will.
I knew there was more to learn if I was brave enough to stay and wait until I’d seen it all. No part of me wanted to be that brave, and still, I stayed and watched.
Time twisted back on itself as my failure played out in reverse, then froze again at the moment the card lanced Ms. Pink Heart’s skin. This was my chance to see what else I could glean, so I stepped forward, laid a hand tentatively on the woman’s back, and let her future slide through me.
An unhappy marriage had not been Diana’s goal, or if it was, she’d missed the mark. Unless this woman's misery hadn’t been the primary target. Circling the tableau, I tested the man who should have been matched and promptly forgot to breathe.
Dark images. Darker emotions. Scorned men and women turning from love, this man among them. Turning hard like Diana. An army spewing hate into the world and painting it with the black pain of betrayal. Inch by inch, the wave of discontent spread across the world.
Like a news report from hell, a reel of destruction played out for me. Building hurt and hate until the final death of love created the dark world Diana craved. Card after card lanced the hearts of her intended victims; Diana had been at this a long time, and I was late to the party.
The vision shifted from history through the present and into the future until the final card spun into an innocent heart and I saw what Diana had been working to accomplish. When the last, card-borne death of love fed the darkness of her heart, the dark Goddess devoured the final shred of her own humanity and Diana ascended to god status.
As if she’d known I was watching all along, the evil thing laughed and the sharp sound of it cut the vision to shreds all around me.
I can't tell you how I got home, only that I was on autopilot the whole way.
Chapter Eighteen
“WHY DO YOU THINK HANGING around with that beanpole is a good idea?” Whenever Flix mentioned Serena, his nose wrinkled with distaste and not in a manly way, either. I wasn’t sure why he was so focused on her lately, but he couldn’t stop complaining about her.
“That beanpole is about to become family. I’ve made up with her, and you might try opening yourself up and having a little empathy, considering that’s what you supposedly do best. Serena did some unspeakable things, but if I can give her a second chance, so can you. She called and asked if she could come over, that’s a huge step for her considering our history, and I’m sure it wasn’t easy. I’m not asking you to be friends with her, just don’t be mean. Okay?”
“Fine. But only because you’re my best friend. Otherwise, I’d let that witch rot.”
I didn’t believe it for a second; Flix has a heart of gold, it’s just buried under fifteen layers of snark. Riding solo for a couple of weeks while Carl went to some remote location I couldn't remember the name of, to study something else I also couldn’t recall, Flix had fallen into his old habit of showing up at my house unannounced.
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