Abi and the Boy She Loves

by Kelsie Stelting

  Marta paused outside the door and looked back at us. “Would you mind giving us a moment with our son?”

  “Of course,” Grandma replied, at the same moment I froze.

  I wanted to be in there with him. But he wasn’t just mine. At least, not yet. He was theirs too. He was still their son. I was just the girlfriend, sliding a not-engagement ring around my finger.

  Grandma squeezed my hand tighter and pulled me away, toward the lobby. I couldn’t stand lobbies anymore, but it looked like I didn’t have a choice.

  Jorge looked between the two of us. “Can I get you anything? Coffee? Food?”

  “No,” I said at the same time Grandma said, “Yes.”

  “Yes,” Grandma said again. “Please get us something light to eat.”

  “Grandma, I said no.”

  “Look at me,” she ordered, her eyes intense. “That boy in there is the love of your life, right?”

  “Right,” I said without hesitation.

  “This is what a lasting relationship is,” she said. “It’s more than vacations and birthday presents. It’s being there for each other during the hard times. Taking care of yourself so you can be there during the hard times.”

  I swallowed, nodded. “I’ll take a sandwich. And some water.”

  “Good.” Grandma hugged me to her side.

  Jorge nodded at her, pure admiration in his features. He wasn’t Grandpa, but he was good for her. Somehow, he leveled out her bossy personality while marveling at her strength. I liked that. There needed to be a bright spot in this horrible situation.

  After I shoved a sandwich that might as well have been cardboard down my throat and drank a whole bottle of water, we sat, and we waited.

  And finally, Marta and Glen came to the lobby.

  Marta looked to me and said, “Jon wants to see you.”

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  My legs shook as I walked down the hallway to 4021. My entire life was in that room, and he had just found out that his had been ruined.

  There would be no way to comfort him. No way to face him with a cheery outlook. I had to be comfortable sitting in his pain, but I didn’t know how to do that. I wanted to take it away. Why couldn’t I have been lying on that side for the skier to crash into? I wanted to go to college, sure, but not as badly as Jon. I wasn’t as good at track as him. Wasn’t as passionate as him. I’d take all his pain and more a million times over if it meant he didn’t have to.

  I finally reached the door and took a deep, steadying breath before walking in.

  Jon almost looked normal, if it weren’t for the bulging underneath the blanket. Whether it was a brace or a cast, I didn’t know, but I knew it shouldn’t have been there.

  His eyes met mine, looking lost, defeated, and I covered my mouth, tears choking out any of my words. Not that there were any words for this moment. None that would be good enough.

  “Abi,” he said, and it decimated the dam.

  I went to him, kneeling next to the bed and taking both of his hands in mine.

  “You know?” he said.

  I nodded.

  And he broke.

  We broke, sobbing together over everything he’d hoped for and everything he’d lost in a fraction of a second.

  How long we cried, I didn’t know, but when we finally stopped, I made him a promise. “We’ll figure this out. Together.”

  His voice was small. “If I never run again...if I never race. Would you still want me?”

  There was only one answer. “Yes. Running might be everything to you, but you are everything to me.”

  He held my hands to his cheek, and my heart shattered even more completely at the moisture there.

  “You have no idea how much that means,” he said, his voice rough.

  I stayed silent, because there was nothing else to say. I had to make good of my promise to be here.

  Eventually, Jon’s breathing slowed, and soft snores escaped his lips. From exhaustion or the medication he was undoubtedly on, I didn’t know. Still, I held on to his hand. Despite him losing something so enormous, gratitude overwhelmed me. Jon was here. He was okay. I could never be thankful enough for that truth.

  Footsteps fell in the hallway, and Grandma was there. She came to stand beside me at Jon’s bed, rubbing my shoulder.

  “How’s he taking it?” she whispered.

  I just shook my head, on the verge of tears yet again.

  “Marta said he shut down. Asked for you.”

  Some strange, selfish part of me was pleased at that news.

  “We’re going to go get our things from the lodge and find a hotel closer to the hospital,” Grandma said. “Marta and Glen are coming with us. Are you good here?”

  I looked back at Jon and his serene face. At least in his sleep he could escape. “We’ll be fine. I can call if anything new happens.”

  She nodded, squeezed my shoulder. “I’m proud of you, Abi.” She kissed the top of my head.

  My lips trembled. “Thank you.”

  And then I settled into the nearest chair and watched Jon sleep, wishing the peaceful look on his face could stay with him during what I knew would be incredibly hard weeks and months to come.

  At some point, I fell asleep. I woke up to Jon shifting in the bed, moaning.

  My eyes snapped open. “What’s happening?”

  “It hurts,” he groaned.

  Scrambling, I searched for the call button and finally found it hanging over the bedrails. After a moment, a voice came over the line. “Yes?”

  “We need pain medicine. Now.”

  “We’ll be there soon.”

  “Thank you,” I said and then gripped Jon’s fingers even tighter. “Squeeze my hand if you need to.”

  He did. Hard. But I welcomed the pain. I wanted him holding on to something if he couldn’t hold on to hope.

  “Soon” in the hospital didn’t mean “soon” to an outsider. Five minutes passed. Ten, then thirty. I called the nurse again, and they said it was shift change. My voice shook with anger as I told them my boyfriend was in pain.

  “We’ll be there soon,” they said.

  “I don’t want soon, I want—”

  The line went dead.

  Jon had gone from shifting and moaning to gritting his teeth and lying stiff as a board. Every muscle in his arms was taut.

  Finally, a nurse walked in, taking her sweet time to give him medicine that would surely take time to kick in. Grandma was right; I needed my strength to deal with this, to advocate for him. It made me wonder what it had been like for her in the final months of Grandpa’s life, while he’d suffered in a hospital bed.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  For the next week, days blended into nights, and the date or time became irrelevant. It was about waking and sleeping and managing pain and checking with the surgeon to make sure healing was taking place and swelling was going down. Texting our friends to give them updates, none substantially new or different.

  And then they released him early in the morning, the day before New Year’s Eve.

  Jon and I rode in the car with his parents while Grandma and Jorge drove his car home. Thankfully, Jon slept most of the way, his leg propped up on the center console.

  I sat beside him, trying to get lost in music and books, but mostly getting caught in the unsure web of our future. Of my fears.

  When we got back to Woodman, Marta sent me home for a nap and a shower. Grandma went to help in my place, even though Marta more than had it covered.

  I showered, as they asked, and then crawled in my bed, wishing for this nightmare to be over. To wake up from it.

  No such luck.

  I walked to Jon’s house the next evening after having slept for more than twelve hours. Even after a good meal and two cups of coffee, I still felt groggy. At least the cold air helped with that.

  Outside the Scollers’ house, it looked prepped for their traditional New Year’s Eve party that doubled as Jon’s birthday bash. Lights hung along t
he guttering, and each of the frogs on their lawn donned party hats atop their metal heads. I pictured Jon inside, wearing a sweater that clung to his shoulders, but my fantasy broke where I’d normally be drooling over his jeans. This time, there would be shorts there, compression socks, an immobilization brace, and crutches.

  I prepared myself for that. But when I opened the door, I saw the one negative scenario I hadn’t prepared myself for.

  Denise.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  I stared at her where she conversed with Marta and Glen, standing with Leanne and Macy, like she belonged in this house, anywhere near Jon.

  Marta noticed me and stepped away from them to greet me. “You’re looking so much better, honey.” She gave my arm an encouraging rub.

  I returned the gesture with a weak smile. It had been hard to miss the dark circles growing under my eyes in the last week. I felt at least ten years older. “How’s he doing?”

  The lines around her eyes creased. “As well as can be expected.” She reached out and took his present from me. “I’ll set this on the table. Allow yourself to enjoy the party tonight, okay?”

  I nodded, even though I had a surprise visitor and Jon’s condition joining forces against me. I had meant to bypass Denise on the way to the kitchen, but she had her steely eyes narrowed in on me.

  “Abi,” she said, blocking the doorway. “How are you? How’s college?”

  Leanne and Macy watched me, waiting to see what I would do with the false kindness she’d displayed.

  I could play this game. Maybe not as well as if I hadn’t just sat by Jon’s hospital bed for an entire week, watching him suffer, but still. “I’m doing great!” I forced out with a smile. “Considering the circumstances. You heard about my boyfriend?”

  Her smooth expression broke at the term. I counted it a win. But she quickly recovered and said, “I heard Jon got hurt trying to teach you to ski. Weren’t y’all being careful? I know it’s so hard to learn when you’re not naturally coordinated.”

  Okay, point Denise. But what was she playing at? More importantly, who was she playing for?

  I lowered my voice, deciding to swing just as low as she had. “We just snuck off for a little...time together, and this skier was out of control. Thanks for your concern. We’ve got him all taken care of.”

  And then I walked away. If Denise wanted to go another round, she’d have to chase me for the chance.

  Stormy quickly appeared at my side. “Gah, I can’t stand Denise. How she and Leanne share DNA, I have no idea.”

  “I mean, it’s not like Leanne’s all sunshine and rainbows.” I stopped at the cider dispenser and poured myself a glass, purely for something to do with my hands.

  Stormy leaned back against the island. “True. But at least Leanne’s not evil.”

  “And she’s not trying to steal Jon back.”

  “It would be kind of pointless, considering he has a penis and all.”

  I laughed. Finally. It felt foreign. “Speaking of penises, have you seen Jon yet?”

  She shook her head. “Frank’s upstairs with him in his room. I think they’re watching a movie.”

  I nodded, sad that Jon had isolated himself that way. He was usually the life of the party, making everyone feel at home in the media room.

  “They’re fine up there. But what about you?” she said, rubbing my arm. “How are you doing? This can’t be easy.”

  Moisture sprang to my eyes. It always seemed to be at the ready these days. “I’m worried about him.”

  She pulled me into a hug, her growing stomach pressing against my waist. “You’re the strongest person I know. He’s lucky to have you.”

  “Lucky isn’t the word I’d use to describe him.”

  Her mouth twisted to the side. “Maybe not right now. But he is.”

  I hoped she was right, but I couldn’t see how. I needed to change the subject, or I’d fall apart right here and be an even bigger puddle than the punch bowl. “Where are the others?”

  She knew who I meant. Our friends. My rocks. She counted off on her fingers. “Freckles, Andrew, and Skye are on the back porch, drinking cider with rum. Those jerks. Macy and Leanne agreed to babysit the enemy, Roberto’s already back in NC, and you know where Frank is.”

  “And Michele?” I asked.

  “Coming soon, I think.”

  I nodded. “Let’s go outside?”

  “You don’t want to see Jon?”

  I did, but... “I think it would be good for him to have some guy time.”

  She put her arm around me. “And you need some friend time.”

  We walked together outside and sat on the back porch with Andrew, Skye, and Evan.

  Evan nudged my arm. “You good?” he asked low.

  I shrugged.

  “Come on,” he said, draining his cup and standing up. “I have something for you in my car.”

  “Sure.”

  We told our friends we’d be back and walked to his SUV. I was going to wait on the sidewalk for him to get whatever it was, but he opened the door for me so I could get in.

  I did, and when he sat in the driver’s side, turning on the vehicle, I looked over at him, confused. “What are we doing out here?”

  Concern was plain in his dark brown eyes, even in the low light cast from the streetlights. “You looked like you could use a second away from it all.”

  The tears that were always there came back, and I stared at him. How did he know?

  I sobbed into my hands, all of it finally hitting me. That life would be forever different for Jon, for me—for us.

  Evan turned off the car and got out, stunning me out of my tears. Where was he going?

  Soon, he was on my side, opening the door. “Come to the back seat,” he said. “I can’t hug you here.”

  I half laughed, half sobbed and did as he asked. We sat in the back seat, him cradling me and holding me tight and letting me be the weak one for the first time in seven days. I cried into his chest, and he stroked my hair, never asking for explanations or offering empty fixes.

  By the time my sobs finally slowed, the windows were fogged, and my eyes burned. I looked up at Evan and thanked him. I couldn’t be grateful enough for this burden he’d lifted off of me, if only for a little while.

  “Any time,” he said and kissed the top of my head.

  The car door jerked open, and there stood Michele, mouth open in horror. “I knew it.”

  The bigger problem? Denise was right behind her.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  As Denise sprinted back toward the house, I sat frozen, torn between backing up Evan and stopping whatever lies Denise would spread once she got inside. Of course, that meant I sat there, mouth gaping, making Evan and me look guiltier than we were.

  “How could you?” Michele demanded.

  I had to believe Jon would trust me enough to know the truth. And Evan had been a real friend.

  “Michele,” I said, “we were just talking in the car.” The tears on my face made my skin sting from the cold. I wiped at them and looked toward the sky. “He was helping me with this mess. It’s just a misunderstanding.”

  She ignored me, staring at Evan instead. “Was this your plan all along? Bide your time until she was heartbroken and then be her knight in shining armor?”

  “What?” Evan’s face screwed up with incredulity. “No, M, that’s not even close to true.”

  “Really,” I said. “I’m with Jon, I love Jon, I would never try to risk that.”

  Michele rolled her eyes. “Yeah, that’s why you’re always flirting with Evan and Roberto right in front of him.”

  My head jerked back with the force of her accusation. “Flirting? What are you talking about?”

  “Like you don’t know,” she scoffed. “There’s a reason you’re out here with Evan instead of in there with Jon.”

  “Yeah, because Evan’s my friend, and Jon’s a big boy. He can handle a few minutes away from me.”

  “S
ure,” she countered. “Like he hasn’t just been waiting to get Denise back after he saw what you didn’t have to offer beneath the sheets.”

  I couldn’t even breathe through all the red in front of me. Michele had no idea what I’d been through, what I’d overcome, what Jon and I shared. And now she had the nerve to act like Denise could swoop in one night at a party and shatter it all? Whoever did her lobotomy needed to be slapped. Right after her.

  I stepped forward, hand raised, ready to put her in her place—preferably on the ground.

  “Enough!” Evan yelled. “Michele, it’s over. I’m tired of you constantly being jealous of Abi. She’s my friend, but if you don’t trust me, there’s nothing here.” He waved his hand between the two of them. “I can’t be with someone who doesn’t take me at my word or let me spend time with my friends.” He looked at me. “And I expected more from you than to stoop to her level.”

  He pushed past the two of us and got in his car. The tires squealed as he peeled off, leaving Michele and me standing in the street. She looked stunned, like a deer in the headlights with her doe eyes wide and mouth slightly open.

  Even though she’d said some horrible things, I felt bad for her. She clearly liked Evan. And he was right. How could I have been ready to do the same thing my parents did to me? “Michele, I—”

  “No.” She held up her hand. “There’s nothing you can do to make me feel better. But don’t worry, you’ll know exactly how I feel by the end of the night.”

  With that, she ran toward her car and got in. Now I was alone, the sounds of the party finally registering in my ears. I looked up at the window I knew was Jon’s, at the figures moving behind the curtains. Jon would believe me.

  He had to.

  Right?

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  I walked up the stairs to Jon’s room, my head pounding with fear. I didn’t know what Denise had done, but I knew she was the master manipulator. If she wanted Jon back—or to get even for him leaving her for me—she would pull out all the stops. She would give everything in her effort and more.