Roughneck: A Payne Brothers Romance

by Frost, Sosie

  And how did I repay him? I’d insulted him. Hurt him.

  Never again.

  I pulled him over me and wrapped my fingers into his shirt. His rough, demanding kiss silenced my protests. He was right. Tidus didn’t know how to make love. But a kiss didn’t need to be without teeth, a touch without claw, or sensual word without command. He pawed at me, clutched me, possessed me like a beast overwhelmed by carnal, unrelenting desire.

  And it was everything and nothing I’d ever imagined.

  He wrenched his shirt off and pitched it across the room. I stared in awe at his bare chest, muscles rippling. Every inch of him was a warning for a girl like me to stay away.

  He’d tattooed his flesh. Tribal stripes. Images of profanity. Ugliness. Flames. He’d tried to destroy himself with the worst, most vile images he could imagine.

  So, I pressed my fingers into the hard muscles, goosebumped skin, and damning ink.

  And he flinched.

  It broke my heart.

  I hadn’t struck him, sliced him, burned him. But he winced just the same. As if the soft graze of my curious fingertips were as threatening as a weapon.

  Had he never been touched like that before?

  Tidus moved against me, and I allowed my kisses to shift, pressing my lips against his stubbled jaw, along his neck. My hands drifted low, but his abs tensed, more prepared for a barfight punch than the teasing caress of a woman.

  I whispered against the salty heat of his skin. “I…want to taste you. Like you tasted me.”

  Couldn’t bring myself to use the actual words. Besides, he’d probably heard them countless times before, but never with actual desire.

  Tidus allowed me to sit up, though he was the one to remove my clothes. I expected to feel shamed, dirty, vulgar.

  But my shirt fell away, my bra unhooked, and my pants shimmied down my legs.

  And I felt beautiful.

  Tidus’s stare blended absolute amazement with a beaten, tortured pain. His words lodged in his throat. Thick. Harsh. A warning of desire and monstrous lust.

  I’d been naked for him before, but I hadn’t let him see me.

  It was the first time in my life I’d been truly admired.

  Tidus wasn’t the type of man to seek out beauty, but he’d transformed me into something priceless. A work of indescribable art. A precious jewel. A woman to be savored.

  And yet, he spoke such sadness. “I’m not worth…this.”

  I’d never met a man so confident in his faults that he’d refuse even the simplest kindnesses and affection.

  That would change.

  I’d make him see.

  I pushed off the bed, falling to my knees before him. His jeans were held with a worn belt. The soft tinkling of metal should have embarrassed me—such a lewd, raw promise. But the thickness that pulsed beneath, tenting his jeans and struggling to be free, replaced any hesitation with eagerness.

  I tugged the jeans over his legs.

  No boxers. No briefs. I expected nothing less. It was like he wished to punish himself by torturing that sensitive part of him against rough denim and unyielding metal.

  I wasn’t that naïve. I knew this man often had women on their knees. But I doubted any of them had ever offered him the happiness he craved. They never saw him, never wanted the real man, the soul trapped under his tattooed prison.

  I had no idea what to do except blend instinct with compassion. I ran my hands over his legs, tickled his thighs, set my hands at the base of his intimidating cock. How else could I show Tidus that I saw more in him than just a brutal troublemaker of a man?

  My hands barely fit around his cock. What should have been a frightening, throbbing piece of raging meat looked amazing between my dark fingers. His flesh was hard but velvet soft. Pulsing, but still within my grasp.

  I let the hunter green of his eyes capture me. My kiss gently pecked the head of his monster cock.

  The soft grace of my mouth was almost enough to bring him crashing down. He grunted, his eye squeezed shut. His fingers tangled in his hair, and he arched his back and flexed every muscle as my hands tightened over his length.

  “God damn, Honey.” The words raged from his throat. “How are you this fucking sweet?”

  With a single kiss, I’d torn our worlds apart. Trapped him between a world of roughness and misery and thrust us both into a mystery of soft touches and sensual promises.

  It wasn’t fair to him.

  Wasn’t fair to me.

  Who was this man? Why did I shudder at his touch and giggle at his words? I hadn’t simply crashed my truck into him—I’d shattered my soul on impact and embedded him within my heart.

  I had no idea why I fell to my knees before him, took his thickness into my mouth, and delighted him with the swirl of my tongue, but nothing had ever felt so right.

  Was it so bad to want to be a part of this man? To know him? To understand him?

  To want him?

  Tidus Payne wasn’t a good man, but someone should’ve loved him.

  Why couldn’t it be me?

  I took his cock as deeply as I could into my mouth, coughed, then pulled away with a raspy gasp of air. Tidus loved that. How the hell was a girl supposed to take such a thick piece of meat? His hand gently tucked into my hair as I struggled with the sheer size of him.

  I bit my lip. “Tell me if I’m doing anything wrong.”

  “You’ve never done anything wrong in your life, Honey. You’re not gonna start now.”

  How could a man with such low expectations for himself think so highly of others? “I’ve never really done this before. I want you to like it.”

  “You could stop now, and I’d die happy.”

  “Really?”

  “You wanna test it?”

  I smirked. “You think I’m that cruel?”

  Tidus groaned as I took him once more into my mouth. “You’re the sweetest girl in the world, Honey, but those lips will probably destroy me.”

  “Never.”

  He popped out of my mouth with a wet slurp. I giggled again.

  “Didn’t say it’d be bad…” He grunted. “As long as you’re still around when I put myself back together.”

  I slowed my teasing. “You want me to stay?”

  “I want you to do a lot of things. None of it is good.”

  And yet, I loved every indecent, delicious thought that popped into my head.

  Who knew being naughty was also so fun?

  I worked harder on his cock, using my hand to ensure every inch of that hot, dangerous length was delighted by flesh or tongue. Every pump tensed his body harder.

  He sweated. Groaned. Pushed harder against my lips. Apparently, he liked something I was doing.

  And I liked it too.

  I hummed over his cock, swallowing as much of his length as I could. But Tidus wasn’t a patient man. With a roar, he pushed me onto the bed.

  I landed on my back. Naked. Exposed. I wasn’t sure what to do with my legs, hands, eyes. I watched him, hungry and eager, as he stole a quick breath. His cock twitched. I smirked as his hand returned, jerking it three times. It was all he could do to not leap over me. Take me. Make me his.

  I slowly spread my legs and invited him close.

  “Fuck, you’re gonna get us both in trouble,” he grunted.

  I pointed at his raging cock. “You didn’t let me finish.”

  “I’m not gonna come before I get a taste of you.”

  “Fair is fair, I suppose…”

  He pushed me flat against the mattress, surveying my offered body and the goosebumps teasing me head to toe. His voice shredded the words, harsh and shadowed with feral excitement.

  “Life’s never been fair to me.” He lowered between my legs and licked with a broad stroke of his tongue. “I gotta take what I can get.”

  The heat of his mouth damned me with desire. I arched only to offer more of my sensitive slit to him. He greedily accepted, burying his face between my thighs.

  N
othing would ever sate this man’s hunger.

  “You sure you want this?” His voice strained with lust and aggression. “I don’t know how to be gentle.”

  “Then be rough.”

  “I don’t know how to be generous.”

  “I can make my own fun.”

  But then he broke, fumbling for the words.

  Lost.

  Lonely.

  “I…” Tidus swallowed. “I don’t know how to be me.”

  He’d stilled, so I moved for him. Opened my legs and sunk deeper into the bed to welcome him tight against my body. His warmth overwhelmed me. So did the hardness pressed against my slit.

  “Then let me help you…” I cradled his cheek in my hand. “Find yourself in me.”

  His expression twisted—a betrayal of who he was and the hope of the man he could be. His jaw tightened, and his murmured apology whispered in solemn sweetness. He guided himself to my slit, swirled in readying promise, then consumed me in a violently perfect stroke that might have torn me apart if I weren’t holding onto him so tightly.

  I arched, tensed, whimpered. My fingers dug into his skin in preparation for what a man of his size might do to me.

  The pleasure bound me first. He sliced inside, through the heat and tightness, sinking so deeply within me it was as if my body were made specifically for him to take, ravage, and thoroughly dominate.

  “Big…” I clutched his chest. “Wow…”

  He filled me completely, until every last inch of him had conquered my softness. I couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t speak. Couldn’t do anything besides tremble in his arms as a wave of desire crashed into my core.

  He kissed me, too hard but not nearly hard enough. “Damn, Honey. I…don’t want to hurt you.”

  “Then don’t stop.”

  “You should have more than a quick fuck.”

  My words tumbled between blessed sighs and relieved cries. “Don’t make it quick. We have all night…”

  He withdrew mere inches before barreling into me, as if he feared losing my warmth, my tightness, my heart.

  And I feared the same.

  My hips pressed up, slamming against him as all reason and hesitation vanished in the sweaty heat of our bodies. Pleasure blinded us. Desire possessed us. The pulsing, heart-aching connection forged everything that we had lost and found, feared and loved, refused and accepted into a blur of frantic desperation.

  In that instant, with a single heartbeat, I showed him everything I’d felt for him, everything I saw in him. The good. The kind. The man who was more than just a lost soul of missed opportunities and broken laws.

  His hands gripped me tight. Fierce. Like I might escape his embrace and never return.

  If only he knew…

  He took me, fucked me, held me tight, and every thrust awakened a part of me I never knew existed. A single touch, and he’d untangled everything in my heart, my body, my mind.

  Who I was. What I really wanted.

  Why I’d really stayed in Butterpond.

  I’d surrendered to Tidus, hoping for a little fun, a lot of excitement, and a chance to make a mistake. But nothing was more terrifying than the truth.

  I fell for this man.

  For good or bad, right or wrong, mistake or the only thing that mattered anymore.

  I wanted him in more ways than just rutting and panting in the dark.

  And he’d never believe me.

  The man was strong. He trapped me against his chest, between the bed, and leaned over me only to deliver deep, perfect strokes of his cock. Every thrust rampaged into me as if he planned to steal the pleasure I willingly offered. I clung to him. Curled my legs around him. Shivered as he whispered filthy, lovely promises.

  “I shouldn’t be taking you like this…” Tidus slammed against me. “Should have done something special for your first time.”

  My fingers dug into his arms. “Sorry, bad boy. It’s not my first time.”

  “It’s the first time you’ve been fucked right.”

  I shuddered, lost in the heat that so very nearly suffocated me.

  “Should have taken you to a fancy hotel…” Tidus punished himself by taking me harder. “Champagne. Roses. Caviar or some shit.”

  My voice broke, crippled as a new tension coiled tight inside me. “I only need you.”

  “You need more than my cock.”

  He was right, but he wasn’t ready for the truth.

  I could touch him. Hold him. Take him into my very soul, but the instant I asked for more than sex, for more than the usual dirty demands women asked of him, he’d shut down. Run. Deny everything and push me out of his bed, his mind, his life.

  I whispered too gently for the beast. He nearly crumpled against me, shocked by the simple caress of my fingers.

  “All I need is us. Right here. Take me. Fuck me. Let’s make a beautiful mistake.”

  Tidus grimaced, plunging as deeply within me as he could get. “Nothing’s beautiful about me, Honey.”

  I wasn’t sure how long it’d take him to see it or if he’d ever forgive himself for what might-have-been. Maybe soon. Maybe never.

  Or maybe all he needed was someone to show him the way.

  “You’re not the man you were in the past…” I surrendered to him completely, falling limp in his arms only to welcome the rough, perfect, aching thrusts blinding me to the world. “And you don’t know who you’ll be in the future. Just forget everything, Tidus. Stay with me. Now. Right here. Fuck me. Kiss me. Come in me. You only have to think about tonight.”

  “You’re worse than any drug…more dangerous than any drink.”

  “You don’t have to regret this.”

  He shuddered. “Not sure how I’ll survive it.”

  My voice broke, lost in a half-bitten moan and silenced by his kiss. His cock grew harder, superheating inside of my already molten slickness. The lust overwhelmed us, shocked us, consumed us.

  He was a rough man who couldn’t be gentle. I was a gentle woman who could handle a little rough. I’d surrender to it. Help him through it.

  Love it.

  Love him.

  “You’re gonna come.” He spoke the truth as if it were a command. Maybe it was. “You’re gonna come for me, Honey. And you’re gonna remember this moment forever.”

  “Just try to make me forget it.”

  “You want it?”

  My smile would break him completely. “Like I’ve never wanted anything else in this world.”

  It didn’t please him. Tidus fucked me harder. Faster. Held my hips and punished me against the bed, as if denying himself that pleasure.

  Or denying himself the truth.

  “Who the fuck am I to give you pleasure?” He growled against my lips, stealing kisses between thrusts. “You’re too damned beautiful, Honey. I can’t help myself.”

  “It’s perfect…you’re perfect.”

  “Where the hell did you come from?” His words broke. “Why are you still here. Why would you let me do these things to you?”

  I couldn’t answer. The heat enveloped me, and my vision blurred into white sparks of absolute ecstasy. The pleasure erupted deep, stealing my breath, my thoughts, even my grip on him.

  But he was there.

  Holding me.

  Fucking me.

  Trapping me within an exquisite pain neither of us understood.

  His words rasped against his own desire.

  “Honey…what the hell do you see in me?”

  Fire scorched me. The shivers froze me. The tension tore me apart.

  And his thrusts forced the pieces back together. Every breath wavered, broken by a mist of tears I didn’t understand.

  “I don’t deserve you,” he whispered.

  “Too bad…” I arched against him. “I’m yours.”

  “Don’t say that. Fuck. You don’t know what I’d do with you. Bottle you. Drink you. Inject you into my fucking veins.”

  “Fuck me, Tidus.”

  “And then what?”
His body trembled and sweated, tortured on the edge of his own oblivion. “This is a mistake. You know it’s a mistake.”

  “It’s not.”

  “I’ve never once made a good decision in my life.”

  “And I’ve never wanted any man the way I want you.”

  “You’re the worst addiction…”

  He strained, pulled away, and sat still, just barely inside of me. The man was cruel, punishing me with his own agony. I struggled beneath him, clawed at him, pressed my hips up to cast me over the edge myself.

  But he knew my body better than I did.

  Understood the pleasure more than I could comprehend.

  And denied me to save us both.

  “Please, Tidus…” I couldn’t breathe, but I forced the words, the thoughts, the truth. “I want you. You can want me. There’s nothing wrong with this.”

  “Not now…but what about tomorrow? The next day?”

  “Forget about it.”

  “I can’t stay inside of you forever.” He closed his eyes. “I can’t promise you anything.”

  “Promise me nothing. Give me everything now. Your cock. Your body.”

  “I can’t.”

  He was killing me. The edge of pleasure was sharp, unforgiving. One slip and I’d be lost in perfection. One cut, and I’d ruin myself in despair.

  One wrong word, one terrified mistake, and I’d destroy him too.

  “I’ll never find a way out of you…” Tidus moved once more, resigning himself to instinct. “I’ll just bury in deeper. Hide inside you. Break myself apart. I’ll never heal.”

  “Fuck me, Tidus…” The words sounded too dirty, too wrong. But nothing else would free him from his own fears. “You can fuck me. Take me. Love me.”

  He nearly collapsed, as if he’d never heard that word before. Never understood it.

  Never gave himself permission to feel it.

  With a crazed, lust-fueled crash, Tidus dove over me. His grunts turned animalistic and wild as he seized my body and claimed my slit with a renewed passion. He trapped me against the sheer muscle of his chest. The leather-kissed scent of his body bound me tighter.

  Within seconds, he’d possessed me completely, fucking me with a cock he’d only ever used to shame, humiliate, and hate. Now, for the first time, he fucked to give pleasure, comfort, and deliver every last sensual promise.