“Fuck, all right. We fucked. What I need to know is whether it seemed like an emotional moment, or whatever.”
“It was emotional for us,” Rohan said. “That was the night Bodhi got on board. While we were down at the bottom of the mountain in the tour bus, Deva and Bodhi were in a cabin in a snowstorm, binding souls. I think the three of us could sense Bodhi’s soul becoming part of the mix. We couldn’t be in the same room at the same time with Deva without it destroying her, but the second he added his soul, ours fell into place like puzzle pieces. It was fucking beautiful for all three of us. We couldn’t resist.”
His earnest speech made me relax and smile. “Yeah? So it was about her?”
“It’s always about her, Maestro,” Keagan said. “You should know that by now, even if you can’t remember it.”
I looked down at Deva—really looked at her. She gazed up at me with wide eyes. In her gaze I saw hope, and more love than I could have imagined being directed my way.
“What the fuck did I ever do to deserve you?”
“It’s about all of you,” she said, glancing around at the others before returning her gaze to mine. “But you were the one who saved me. From the very beginning, you were there. Your love was what kept me alive, Ozzie. Let us help you find it again.”
I reached down and threaded my fingers through hers. I had no idea where our next stop would take us, but I was determined to follow this path to its bitter beginning.
A throat clearing made me tear my gaze away from her. Bodhi lifted a hand.
“Ah, I know how important this memory hunt is for everyone, but now that we’re back, I’d really like to check in on my mom. We haven’t been able to reach Sandor and we still don’t know what happened to the other turul. Any chance we could find a phone?”
14
Deva
“Yes! Sweet Mother, of course we need to check on Maddie before we do anything else.”
I tugged the tether in my mind that tied me to the hounds, then winced at the lack of response. To say I was worried about them was an understatement, but I’d been so wrapped up in revisiting Ozzie’s memories that I’d forgotten.
I went to Bodhi and clasped his hand, turning back to give Ozzie an apologetic smile. He only nodded, but the warm glow of his aura gave me confidence that he’d made the decision to stick with us through this search.
Llyr stretched out his hands and we formed a circle. “Where should we start? Your house?”
“There first, then the music store,” Bodhi said.
Llyr pulled us into the drift, and a moment later, the six of us landed on a rainy widow’s walk. I recognized the view from the top of Bodhi’s house, except the beach was obscured by a chilly mist. The crashing waves still battered the shore, and my stomach fluttered at the errant memory of the first time I’d been up here.
We followed Bodhi down the steep stairs and into the house. The place was so silent my skin prickled. When I glanced at Bodhi, a grim, fearful look was writ across his face.
“Mom? Grandma? Anyone home?” he called out, tearing down the hall, then trotting down the stairs and out of view.
Then it hit me what was missing: Every time I’d visited, this house had been filled with music. Someone was always either playing piano, singing, or the stereo was on. But today the house felt dull and dreary, and not just because of the weather.
Bodhi’s aura spiked brilliant yellow with his rising panic. “Mom? Grandma? Are you here? Where are you?”
We followed him through every room, but none of his family were there. Finally he wrenched open the front door and darted out onto the porch, staring toward the street in utter bewilderment.
“This makes no sense. Someone is always here.”
He sounded so helpless. I slipped my hand into his and squeezed. “We’ll try the music store. Their routines may have changed since Maddie came home.”
He squeezed back. “I can’t shake this feeling that something is really wrong.”
Stepping closer, I slipped my arms around him. He returned my embrace with a desperate hug.
Llyr appeared at Bodhi’s back and met my eyes. “We shouldn’t drift from out here,” he said.
I nodded, but as I withdrew from Bodhi, a silver SUV pulled into the driveway. Bodhi practically leaped down the steps and ran toward it, the rain soaking into his clothes and plastering the hair to his skull.
Willem sat in the driver’s seat frowning out at us. Susannah’s husband Gus occupied the passenger’s seat. The pair got out, heedless of the rain, but both extended big umbrellas as they opened the rear doors.
Susannah stepped out gingerly beneath the umbrella Gus held for her. I couldn’t discern much from her aura besides worry, but her face lit up for the briefest second when she saw Bodhi. He hugged her, his gaze still darting toward the SUV. Susannah said something I couldn’t hear and glanced behind her.
Two other figures who I assumed were Maddie and Sandor emerged from the other side, partially obscured beneath the huge umbrella Willem carried. The rain had become a nearly deafening deluge now, and I stayed on the porch with the others, waiting with a heavy weight in my chest as Bodhi’s family made their way up the path.
When Susannah and Gus climbed the porch steps, I went to them. “What’s wrong, Susannah?”
“I don’t quite know,” she said, giving a slow shake of her head. “I’m going to go in and get supper started. We can talk inside.” She reached out and squeezed my hand with strong fingers, nodded, then tugged Gus into the house.
Bodhi stood at the bottom of the steps, getting drenched as Willem made his way toward us, holding the umbrella over Sandor and Maddie. The pair clung to each other, stone-faced, but Maddie broke away the second they reached Bodhi and hugged him fiercely. Behind her, Sandor halted, placing a hand on her shoulder. His lips were pressed into a tight line.
They all seemed whole and unharmed, so this display that was akin to grief had me utterly baffled. I sensed a warmth at my back and Ozzie whispered, “Should I know these people?” so faintly only someone with turul hearing could make out the words.
“Yes,” I said without looking at him. “Willem and Sandor are two of your closest friends.”
He didn’t reply, but moved to stand at my side as the group made their way toward us through the rain. Sandor looked up, and his expression lost its grim set for a moment when he saw Ozzie, but he didn’t speak. When he reached the top step, he wrapped his arms around Ozzie and hugged him tightly.
Ozzie let out a little “oof,” but returned the hug, albeit a little awkwardly. Sandor pulled back, holding him at arm’s length and looking at him quizzically, then at me. His silence worried me.
“Did you hear us calling to you last night?” I asked.
Sandor nodded. His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed.
“Why didn’t you answer?” Llyr asked.
Sandor shifted his gaze to Llyr and raised a hand to his throat, closed his eyes, and inhaled a shaky breath. When he exhaled, he shook his head and mouthed the words, “Lost my voice.” Not even a whisper passed his lips for us to hear.
“That’s fucking impossible,” Ozzie said.
Sandor gave him a half-hearted shrug, his eyes filled with pain.
“Let’s get inside where it’s dry and trade stories,” Maddie said. “I hope you all have some clue as to what the hell is going on.”
The eleven of us crowded into the kitchen long enough to force Susannah to shoo us out. She and Gus remained behind to cook while the rest of us settled in the living room. Bodhi sat on the piano bench while the others took up the remaining seats. But there weren’t enough to go around, and I wound up on Llyr’s lap while Rohan and Keagan settled on the floor at our feet.
“Glad to have you back unscathed, Maestro,” Willem said, nodding at Ozzie.
From his armchair, Ozzie glanced at me, and I bit my lip. “Yeah, about that . . . Ozzie isn’t exactly unscathed. Wherever Fate sent him made him lose his memory.”
/>
Sandor’s eyebrows shot up and he mouthed the word “shit.”
Ozzie shrugged. “We’re working on it. I’m more concerned about the fact that a turul has been rendered mute. That shouldn’t be possible. As long as we can breathe, we can sing, or at least whisper.”
“Do you know how this happened?” I asked, glancing between Willem and Sandor.
Maddie shook her head. “He just woke up yesterday morning and couldn’t talk.”
“We drove downtown today to meet with Kol Magnus,” Willem said. “I was hoping he’d know someone who could help. I tried healing Sandor, but there’s no damage. And it seems this isn’t an isolated incident—all the turul in Kol’s employ suffer the same affliction, and he’s gotten calls from dragons living in the Enclaves. Every last turul . . .” His voice dropped in pitch and he clenched his jaw. “Every last turul has been afflicted, and not only that, they’re unable to shift. They have lost their wings.”
Maddie looked at Sandor with deep concern. He met her gaze, his expression bleak, and squeezed her hand where it rested on his knee.
Llyr cursed. “The Quorum needs to know the extent of the issue. Give me a moment.”
Gently, he set me on my feet and stood. I reached out and grabbed his hand, suddenly anxious about letting him leave my sight. I didn’t want to risk losing him, not when something so disturbing was going on.
He paused long enough to wrap me in his arms. “Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere. I just want to head up to the roof to send the message. The rain magnifies my power, so I can make sure the message reaches the right ears. Zephyrus and his brothers should hear me without issue while you guys get more details.”
“But if it’s really Ouranos, is there anything they can do?”
“They need to know, even if they can’t help. They can at least mobilize to the Enclaves and let the turul know we’re doing something.”
He bent and pressed his lips to mine in a quick kiss.
When he left, I turned back around to see Maddie, Sandor, and Willem all grinning at me. Warmth flooded my cheeks.
Willem stood and said, “Congratulations, Deva. Does this mean you have a completed soul?” He opened his arms and I enjoyed yet another big hug, but sighed when he released me.
“Not yet. Wherever Fate sent Ozzie, he came back . . . different . . .”
“Whatever alternate reality your Fate sent me to changed me,” Ozzie said. “I don’t remember a world with Fate, but I sure as shit know what a vindictive motherfucker Ouranos is. Where I came from . . . or was imprisoned, as Deva insists . . . Fate doesn’t exist, and Ouranos cursed the turul to never feel love. So despite what your Quorum decides, I think we’ve all got our work cut out for us. We need to take down a god to set things right again.”
A chill skittered down my spine. He may not have loved me, but he definitely possessed the same headstrong determination as the Ozzie I remembered.
Sandor lifted a hand to catch my attention. His brow was furrowed and he gestured around my feet. “Hounds?” he mouthed.
“Missing,” I said. “I sent them to lead us to Fate, but they never returned, and I can’t reach them through our link anymore. The bloodline seems to be fine, at least.”
Sandor stood then, his jaw set. He started to mouth something else, but his lips only formed a silent curse. He stomped out of the room and returned a moment later with a pad of paper and a pen. He scribbled something down and then held it up.
“Get Sophia North,” it read. “If she can hear you, she will come.”
“What the hell can my grandmother do?” Ozzie asked.
“She’s a lot more powerful here than she was where you were,” I said. “But it has to be you. I only have passive turul powers without a soul. I can hear whispered messages, but I can’t send them across distances. Now that we’re outside the Haven, she’ll come. Tell her we’re with the Dylans.”
“If what Willem said is true, how will she even get here? Do we wait for her to catch a commercial flight from New York? Assuming that’s where she is.”
“Sophia can drift. Don’t ask me how. All I know is that she and Neph have a history.”
He stared at me open-mouthed for a moment, then nodded and began to whisper.
“Nanyo, if you can hear me, it’s Ozzie again. We need to talk. Or, shit, communicate. I’m with Deva at the . . .” He paused and asked “Where are we again?”
“At the Dylans’ in Venice Beach.”
He repeated the location and finished off with another plea for her to come, then gave me a helpless shrug. “Hope that does it.”
Before he got the last syllable out, my ears popped with the telltale signal that someone had drifted into the room, and the piano made a dissonant noise as if every single key had been hit.
Bodhi cursed and scrambled back, his bench screeching across the floor. Sophia materialized out of the air right in front of him, her small, bird-like frame clad in a plain gray dress and her black hair pinned at the back of her head. She looked weary, but the glyphs on her arms glowed, making me wonder where she drew her power from.
If Ouranos truly had hobbled the turul and she was affected strongly enough not to answer us via normal turul whispers, surely any other wind magic would have been rendered null as well. Whatever powered those marks was some other element, or perhaps an entirely different sort of magic.
Her severe expression softened when she saw me, but she quickly glanced past me to Ozzie. She went to him first, clamped both hands on either side of his head, and scrutinized him. Then she pressed her lips together and shook her head.
Sandor offered her his pad of paper and she took it, scribbled a note, and held it up to me and Ozzie.
“Why no bond?” her barely legible writing inquired.
Ozzie cleared his throat and fidgeted, then shot me a wary look. “This version of her is fucking scary,” he said.
Sophia’s dark eyebrows lifted and she tapped a finger against the pad.
“He can’t,” I said. “He’s under a different curse from whatever alternate reality Fate sent him to.”
Sophia shook her head and scribbled again.
“No curse. Must complete your soul.”
Ozzie and I shared a glance and I said, “We want to, but he can’t make love to me. Trust me, we tried.”
Sophia’s steely eyed look put me on the defensive. I crossed my arms and stared back at her.
Ozzie raised his hands and said, “Nanyo, I would if I could, I promise. Where I came from, the turul aren’t capable of love, thanks to that bastard god of ours. We’re hoping that getting into my head and reclaiming my real memories will fix that, but Deva tells me we need to find Fate to make that work.”
Sophia turned the page of the notepad and scribbled again, then pointed at me while she held up the paper. “Ouranos has Fate and your hounds. You are the key to releasing them. But only if you are whole.”
My stomach lurched. So far we’d really only speculated about the cause of the turul’s lack of communication. To have it confirmed, and to discover that my hounds and Fate had been compromised, made it all too real.
“When we broke the curse . . . did you know Ouranos might do something like this? Did Fate?”
Sophia closed her eyes and exhaled a breath through pursed lips. She nodded slowly. When she opened her eyes, she fixed her gaze on me and mouthed the words. “The gods are testing you. You must not fail.”
“Then tell us what to do to get Ozzie’s memories back,” I said. “I won’t be whole without him.” My voice quavered and Sophia lifted a small, thin hand to my cheek, then shook her head.
With a sigh, she wrote again. “I don’t know, but you must find a way.”
From the doorway, Llyr boomed, “Sophia! Did you have anything to do with this test?”
Sophia jumped and turned, staring wide-eyed at the imposing satyr stalking toward her. Reflexively she stepped back, but Willem caught her from behind. Despite both enormous men towering over
her, her glare still managed to make them both take a step back.
Willem dropped his hands and rumbled, “I’d like to know too, because Mother help me, if you knew and didn’t warn us . . .”
Sophia’s nostrils flared when she lifted the pad and pen again.
“Had to be sure she was strong enough. The gods won’t stand against O directly. Has to be Deva. If she fails, all is lost.”
“Why am I being tested? To see if I’m up to the task of standing up to Ouranos? Or is he the test?”
“O is the test,” Sophia wrote.
“And if I pass this test? What then?”
She regarded me for several seconds, then added, “Rewarded with divinity.”
I read the words over and over, not sure I properly understood. Finally I asked, “Why me?”
Sophia huffed and rolled her eyes, then shrugged and pointed the pen at the ceiling.
“Who knows with the gods?” I translated. “That’s not very helpful.” I sat down and covered my face with my hands. “Why can’t they just spell it out? I just want to live my life without these constant tests.”
Llyr placed a hand on my shoulder and squeezed. “We’ll find a way to do what needs to be done.”
“I know we will, but the second I have the power to control my own fucking life, no one is going to dictate what I do. Not Fate, not the gods, not anyone.”
Ozzie crouched in front of me and smiled. “Well, if you pass this test, it sounds like they want to make you a goddess. I’d be willing to wager when that happens, you can do whatever the fuck you want.”
I sighed and reached out to place a palm against his cheek. His scruff was a comforting, rough warmth against my skin, and I impulsively leaned down to kiss him. He accepted the kiss with a tilt of his head, letting me savor the softness of his lips.
“All I want is to have you back,” I said. “And I will do whatever it takes.”
Sandor was giving us a strange look when we parted, and Ozzie stood again. He gestured to Sophia, who handed him the notepad and pen. He spent a minute writing, then tore the sheet out and handed it to Ozzie.
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