by Brenda Ford
“It doesn’t have to be here. We can move in somewhere else together.”
For a moment, I think that she might be about to explode with rage. I brace, expecting the worst, but that isn’t what comes my way. Instead, Mandy practically jumps on me and she kisses me hard. She clings to me like I’m the only one holding her to the earth right now, like she needs me. I can’t help molding into her, feeling the same way about her as she does for me. I suppose she’s right. We are only young. We don’t need to settle down just yet…
“Okay,” I announce as we pull back from one another. “Let’s go out. Wherever you want to go.”
Her face lights up, she looks extraordinarily happy, which is all I really want. Perhaps all of this jealousy about Tara’s new relationship is the kick up the ass that I clearly need. I have to remember that just because me and Mandy have been together forever, it doesn’t mean that I can’t take her out more and treat her to gifts.
This relationship is everything to me. I will do anything to make it work…
“Are you going to invite me in then?” I say with a tipsy chuckle as we reach Mandy’s front door once more. Going out was a good idea. I feel so much better about everything now. Does it matter if we don’t live together yet? Plenty of people don’t live together. That doesn’t mean anything. “I’d love to see your bedroom.”
I wiggle my eyebrows as she stares at me, letting her know just how much I want her, but she shakes her head. “No, I don’t think so. Not tonight, honey. I have to be up really early in the morning.”
Her words strip the air from my lungs. She has really shocked me now. It’s not like we went on a date because I wanted to get my girlfriend into bed, but the rejection stuns me all the same.
“It isn’t that late.” I glance at my watch. “It’s only just after eleven PM.”
“Hmm, and I have to be at work at six. Which means I’ll need to be up at about four…”
I nod, but the dejection rolls through me anyway. This does happen with Mandy’s job, I can’t be mad about it, but that still doesn’t make it any easier. I hate ending such a wonderful night like this. It’s all sad and cold now. The laughter that was playing on my lips only a moment before is long gone now.
“Yeah okay, well that’s a shame.” I nod and force a smile on to my lips. “Because it’s been nice.”
Mandy leans towards me and gives me the softest, the gentlest kiss ever, the love from her mouth flowing through me. I cup onto her cheeks and hold her there for a couple of seconds before I’m forced to let her go.
“Okay, well you have a nice sleep,” I say quietly. “And next date, I will have a gift for you as well.”
She beams, her expression radiating sun shine. “You will? That’s amazing, I would love that!”
She kisses me once more, harder and more passionately this time, but she still pulls away and waves at me, before heading inside. As she closes the door behind her, shutting me out for the rest of the night, I tell myself to just accept it. It’s okay. This isn’t something weird, to be worried about, I’m still just a little paranoid that’s all. It doesn’t matter how much I try to block out the self-doubt, it keeps coming back.
I grab out my cell phone as I walk away, needing to talk to someone. The first person I always call is Alex when things are shit, so obviously that’s what I’m going to do now. I have a great bond with all of my brothers, but Alex is my twin. We shared a womb together. Our bond is deeper than anything else.
“Alex,” I call out as soon as he answers. “What are you up to, brother? You fancy getting a drink?”
“Err, are you alright, Angelo?” he asks, sounding a little distracted. “What’s going on?”
“Does something have to be going on? We could just go for a drink…”
“I’ve just made plans, that’s all. I’m err… meeting with the band.”
I don’t know if I believe him one hundred percent; I imagine that he’s actually going to meet a woman for a one-night stand. He seems to think that I wouldn’t like him for that, but he’s in a rock band. Of course, he’s going to be sleeping around. That just comes with the life style, doesn’t it? I don’t want to interrupt his night of fun because of my bullshit problems. Everything was probably okay anyway. I didn’t need to be worried.
“Okay, no, don’t worry. I will call Brad.” Since I work closely with our oldest brother at the family business, I’m very close to him as well, so Alex won’t be worried if I’m going to talk with him. “You have a good night. I will see you in the morning if you manage to get your sorry ass home by then.”
He laughs weakly at my little joke before we say our goodbyes and hang up the phone. I stare at the screen for a while, just hoping that everything is okay with him since he acted a little weird, but soon I give up panicking. It seems like I have my own issues right now, I don’t need to worry about my brother. He’s old enough to take care of himself. It’s time for me to get back home, to see if Brad is there. If my oldest brother is at home, he will have some advice for me. Since he now has a very successful relationship of his own, he’ll know just what he’s talking about. Someone needs to tell me how to keep Mandy, how to make sure that she doesn’t get bored of me. He might even tell me that Mandy sending me home tonight and refusing to live with me doesn’t have to mean anything bad. I would love him to tell me that, to know that I can stop panicking.
God, I just want to have confidence in our relationship again. To know that me and Mandy are going to be okay. To be safe in the knowledge that me and her are going to make it to the end.
Chapter Three
Rachel
“Oh, Rachel, you are so beautiful,” Angelo growls as his mouth clings to my throat. “I have wanted you for so long. You have no idea. Watching you up there on that stage has been torture for me.”
There’s a fizzing in the pit of my stomach as my head tilts backwards and desire lolls through me. His lips feel incredible as they graze all over me. I always knew that finally getting this man would be phenomenal, but I didn’t know it would be all consuming like this. Even his fingers on the base of my back are shooting lightning bolts of desire all the way to my core. If I don’t have him soon, I don’t think I’ll survive.
“Fuck me, Angelo,” I gasp out desperately. “We don’t know how much time we have…”
We shouldn’t be doing this. The knowledge that I definitely shouldn’t be with Angelo right now, because he is attached to someone else, rockets through me. But it doesn’t stop me. It can’t. Not now.
His hands slide down my body and rest on my hips for just a second, but it isn’t enough for me. I roll my hips into him, pressing against his gorgeous, already naked body, yearning for more.
“Fuck, you’re so hard,” I rasp desperately. “I want you. I need you. Oh, Angelo…”
The fear that this could all be shattered in an instant is too much for me. It almost makes me weep. At the sound of my words, his fingers hitch underneath the hem line of my deep black dress and he lifts it slightly. His fingers brush against my thighs and sends a deep shiver down my spine. He’s magic. His touch is so magic that it makes me wild. My core throbs and pulses, my body is almost ready to tip over the edge already, and he hasn’t really got anywhere near me yet. He’s edging upwards though, getting closer by the moment, and I don’t know how much I can take. Cries are flying passed my lips, letting me know just how badly I need him.
“Rachel, I can already feel how wet you are,” Angelo gasps as he brushes against my panties, his eager fingers as desperate to get inside me as I was for him. “Is that just for me? Is that how much you want me?”
Instead of answering him, I reach forwards and wrap my fingers around his rock-hard cock. “Is that how much you want me? Huh? Because it feels like you’re pretty desperate for my body too.”
“I like how cheeky you are. It makes me yearn for you even more…”
I angle him towards my panties, no longer messing around, but it seems that Angelo isn
’t about to allow me the control yet. He tugs himself away and drops to his knees in front of me. He keeps his eyes on mine the entire time as he whips my panties away, leaving my desire fully exposed for me.
“Oh wow,” Angelo groans. “You’re stunning down there as well. The best I have ever seen.”
He grabs one of my thighs and tosses it over his shoulder. I grab his hair to keep me upwards. The last thing I want to do is fall now, right when he’s finally going to taste me. It feels like everything that has happened in my life so far has been leading up to this moment, so I need to just experience it all.
“I want you,” I rasp out, my fingers knotting up in his hair. “I want you to taste me.”
“Mmm, I love how you just command things to me,” he moans. “It’s so refreshing.”
His breath blows up and down my soaking wet slit, buzzing desperately. My knees tremble, I lean forwards over him, putting more of myself on to him to hold me up. I want to tell him what his mouth near my core does to me, but I’m utterly breathless. Unable to get even a single word out.
The speed that his mouth comes towards me is painfully slow. Every split second is an hour. I want to scream with frustration. This is killing me. By the time his lips connect with my clit, even the smallest kiss is enough to have me bucking violently. A scream flies out my mouth, it’s impossible to keep quiet. If me and him are supposed to be a secret, then I’m not doing a great job of it at all. But I can’t help it. He’s just perfect…
“Oh fuck!” I yell at the top of my voice as he becomes a mad man, doing anything that he can to coax an orgasm from me. His tongue is everywhere, all over me, tasting every part of me, exploring my core. This makes me weak and jelly like. Angelo has been turning me on for years, the foreplay with this man has been happening for a very long time, so it really isn’t going to take much to tip me over the edge. The fact that his tongue is off the scale wonderful just makes it even more intense. The pressure builds to the point where the heat completely fills me up, tensing up all of my muscles, consuming all of my organs…
And then I fall. As I fall, I tumble hard into the deep abyss of pleasure. The orgasm burns and shatters through me, swallowing up all of my organs and leaving me a mess. I scream, I buck, I writhe, all while clinging on to Angelo’s hair hard. If this is causing him any pain whatsoever, he doesn’t complain. He allows me to feel every inch of this intense pleasure as it rockets through me. Thank God, because I need him, or I’ll crumble.
“Oh fuck, Angelo,” I gasp out as his tongue peels away from me, leaving me emotionally drained and physically weak. “Oh my God, that feels so good. You really are something special. You know that?”
He rises to his feet, his cock standing to attention, needing me. My eyes fall on it and immediately I’m struck with a greedy need again. It’s almost as if he hasn’t just sated me because I need so much more.
“I’m not done with you yet,” he groans, his eyes hooded with desire. “I want to fuck you first.”
I fall backwards against the nearest piece of furniture which just happens to be a table. As soon as I wrap my fingers around it, I hop upwards and plonk my ass down. With a seductive smile playing on my lips, I wiggle my finger and indicate for him to come towards me. He moves willingly, his cock drawn to me like a magnetic force is pulling him closer. With a surge of self-confidence that I don’t recall ever feeling in the bedroom before, I part my thighs for this man who’s made me feel like I’m worthwhile, and wait for him to come to me.
“You really are everything,” he moans while teasing my entrance, not quite slipping in. “Everything to me.”
That statement leaves me with so many questions, but I’m not going to ask any of them. I don’t want to ruin this magical moment by bringing up everything that’s wrong with us. I would just rather not think about it. Instead, I grab his hips and pull him further in to me. I groan with sheer pleasure as he fills me up in the most amazing way possible. It’s incredible, almost like his cock was made to fit right in to me while brushing every spot I need him to. With every thrust, he buries deeper and deeper, sending my head spinning. I can see stars already, even though he just gave me the most amazing orgasm ever, it seems that he’s about to drag me under the waters of bliss again. I haven’t ever experienced the heady rush of multiple rolling orgasms before and I can’t wait for it. Especially since he’s calling my name over and over again like a prayer.
“Oh fuck,” I scream out as his hands knot up in my hair. “Oh my God, Angelo.”
I lean in, needing him to kiss me, and as if he can read my mind, he does. His lips crash against mine and he swallows up all of my screams. I can feel my breath vibrating through him, sending a warmth of pleasure through his body as well. I can feel the pleasure building, screaming through him, and I love it. I cling to him, wanting to feel the bliss as it shatters through his body. I want to experience every inch of this with him, especially if this is the only time me and him are ever going to be together. There’s no telling if we’ll be able to get to this place again, once reality hits we may never find our way back into one another’s arms…
Bleep, bleep. The sound of a phone blasting out shakes me from my bliss. Bleep, bleep.
I almost yell at Angelo for leaving his cell phone on during this time, but as I open my mouth to do so, he fades a little. Everything fades around me. Things are fuzzy and not quite as clear to see anymore. It’s all vanishing, and my eyes are opening, and the world is coming back around me…
“Oh no,” I groan as I realize that I’m dreaming and actually I’m in bed alone. “Urgh, morning.”
Why did I even set an alarm? What do I have to do today that’s so important, I must drag myself out of bed? There has to be something, or I could stay with Angelo in my damn dreams. Since I can’t have him in my life in reality, then why the hell should I be stripped from the amazing times we can have?
As I grab my phone to turn off the alarm, I find myself drifting to the photographs to see Mandy and Alex once more. I stare at the picture, wondering where things would be now if that silly little plan had worked. Angelo would have been single for six months now. We could be maybe getting together… if he decided to like me. I could have the man of my dreams right now, there’s a chance that I could be happy.
But I’m not. I’m here alone and he’s still with her. He doesn’t care that his girlfriend might be cheating on him. He’s decided to forgive that and to stay with the bitch. I have no chance.
I push my body out of bed and look through my reminders on the phone. There is a reason that I’m out of bed, so I need to figure out what it is. The only word on my phone reminder is ‘Sheri’, which is good. I don’t mind that. I want to see my best friend. She will be the perfect distraction from all of this. Sheri is the only person who knows about me and Angelo anyway and my hopeless crush. She might not agree with my silly obsession, she will tell it to me straight as well, but it’s better to talk to her than to no one. If I remain inside my own head, then I risk losing my damn mind.
I call my friend, actually managing to smile as the phone rings. “Hello, Sheri,” I declare as soon as she answers. “We’re meeting up today, aren’t we? What time did we say?”
“Ah, the phone reminders are working then!” she laughs. “I won’t be left sitting on my own.”
“I know, I know. You don’t need to remind me how useless I am! But I’m getting better.”
“Let’s meet for brunch,” Sheri says. “Catch up before you go away again on tour or whatever.”
I laugh and agree, already feeling much better about everything. My friend always has that effect on me. “Sure, sounds good. Will see you soon.”
Chapter Four
Angelo
“Are you okay?” Brad asks me while leaning against the door frame to my office. “You seem distracted.”
“Err… yeah.” I shake my head and try to drag my thoughts away from my mess at home. “I’m good.”
“You don’t have to
lie to me just because I’m the boss.” He steps inside and closes the door behind him. “Because I’m also your brother and I know that there is something going on with you right now. You aren’t yourself. To be honest, you haven’t been for a while. I’ve been worried about you.”
I hang my head low and fight back the emotions that threatens to consume me right now. “I don’t know, Brad. I feel like everything is really fucked up. I know that I shouldn’t bring my personal problems in at work, but I can’t help it anymore. It’s all just… weird. I don’t know how to explain it. Me and Mandy are…”
Brad takes a seat on the other side of my desk and he stares at me. “Something isn’t right, is it?”
“No.” I shake my head. I wait for the weight to lift as I finally admit the truth, but it doesn’t. If anything, saying it aloud just makes it more real and harder to swallow. “No, I don’t think it is.”
It’s a real challenge for me not to fall apart. Ever since the night that Mandy sent me home after our argument, things haven’t been right. When I got home, I didn’t manage to find any of my brothers to talk to, so I left it. And I haven’t said anything since. Not even during all this week when it’s been hard for me to see Mandy. She’s been so busy with work and her friends. Her social life has been wild, which has left me alone and confused.
“So, what’s been happening? Because you two are so good together. Is it just a bad patch?”
I shrug helplessly. “I’m not sure. I just feel like she’s pulling away from me, and it’s all because I asked her about us moving in together. She really doesn’t want to live with me, which seems strange.”
“Well… I don’t think that’s something to worry about,” Brad offers cautiously. “You know how she is. Mandy is quite… high maintenance in her ways. She is probably just scared of giving up space.”