by Blair Young
And now, I felt like I was one of those people.
Because of this, I knew I had changed my opinion on Dean for good. And Susan, too, for that matter. They had forced me to do one thing I really didn’t want to do, and now, I had to worry about what I was going to tell Sutton. Not only what, but how, for that matter.
She should find out from me, that was for sure.
But what was I going to say? How was I going to say it? I had no idea, but I knew I had to figure it out fast. Because, no matter how I said it or what I said, one thing was for certain.
Sutton wasn’t going to be happy, and this wasn’t going to end well.
Chapter 17
Sutton
I knew going to see Harvard in person was going to do wonders for how I felt about the remainder of the school year, but I had to admit, I didn’t have any idea it was going to be quite so good for my soul. And boy, was it ever.
Suddenly, so many things in life that I thought were so important, suddenly didn’t seem to be that big of a deal anymore. Things that I thought were so suffocating and ominous they were going to follow me around my entire life suddenly didn’t seem like they were that big of a deal anymore.
Things that I thought were going to ruin me suddenly were just a big deal in the moment, but really didn’t matter for the rest of my life. It gave me a renewed sense of the things I really did care about, and the things I knew were just going to be forgotten when I got away from this town.
I was still determined to have answers about what happened to my parents. That had been something that had bothered me for so long – it still lingered in the back of my mind. My parents were good people, and they didn’t deserve to die. I didn’t care who my father was investigating or what he was after. He was a good man, and that was all that really mattered.
He didn’t deserve to die, no.
And my mother, well, she didn’t have any outward connections. She lived her life sitting on the couch with a bottle of wine in her hand. She never went anywhere or did anything, and had very few friends to speak of. I refused to believe she could have gotten caught up with anyone who would have done anything to her.
And, the fact that they were killed together while I was at school had to mean something, too. The person who targeted them did it during the day. Not when they were asleep and in their bed, but during the day when I wasn’t home.
And they weren’t going to get away with murder. I didn’t care what they said or did, or what they thought they had accomplished. I was coming for them, and no one was going to stop me. That was final.
But, even with that still eating at the back of my mind, I still felt a renewed sense of hope. This wasn’t the rest of my life. This was just the beginning. Even if I had to dedicate the rest of my life to getting through college then finding the person responsible for murdering my parents, I would do it. And I would be happier when I got out of here and was able to live life my way – out from under Susan’s and Dean’s control.
And, I would have Damon by my side.
I felt so confident now in our relationship. He had proven to me he would take me all the way up to Massachusetts – twelve miles away – and go through a college campus tour, take me to dinner, be there right by my side through a college party – all because he loved me. He cared about me. He was the one person I could trust in this world. He was the one person I knew wouldn’t let anything bad happen to me.
No matter what.
I could tell him anything, anything and he would keep it to himself. I’d never had anyone like that in my life before, and it was hard to wrap my mind around the thought. Even Abby, for as much as I loved and trusted her, there were some things I didn’t think I would tell her.
She was falling even more in love with Peter, and while I was happy for her and him together, I didn’t fully trust that the closer she got to him, she would keep everything to herself. Sure, they both knew some things about me I didn’t want the public to know, but at the same time, there were still things that I only trusted to Damon.
But, I didn’t have to worry about any of that now. I could let go of my past and just focus on my future. It was time to let it all keep moving on. The more I dragged up the things that were before, the harder it was going to be for me to move on to what could be now. And, I didn’t want that.
I wanted to move on with my life, and it was time that I did. It was time that I focused on what really mattered, and that was me and Damon. And getting into Harvard.
Susan had encouraged me over and over to talk to my school counselor and the teachers about starting the application process. She wanted me to get right in with the first wave of applications that Harvard would be getting for the following year, and I agreed. I knew there was a limited number of students that the campus was going to take on the following semester, and I wanted in on that group.
My grades were up, she had promised she was going to help financially, and it was really coming down to the paperwork now. I knew I could get letters of recommendations from many of the teachers who were at school, as well as the principle himself.
I was a model student, despite the fact that I had been bullied and had gotten into one fight my senior year. I worked hard, and I was goal-oriented. I was going to make this work, and I didn’t care how hard I had to fight to make it happen. I knew Secret Bay High prided itself on the students that went on to big name colleges, and it wasn’t going to be hard to get an endorsement from the rest of the school to make that happen.
Now, it was just a matter of putting the papers in the right hands and getting the right signatures. Plain and simple.
With a grin, I carried the brochure along with the notes I’d taken with me to the office. I wanted to start by talking to the guidance counselor of the school. I had long held a resentment toward counselors considering all the time I’d been made to talk to them in my life, but I liked our guidance counselor, and she never pushed me to do things that I didn’t entirely comfortable doing.
She was so different from the therapy counselors I’d dealt with over the years, I felt comfortable with her, and I knew she just wanted what was best for me. She was going to keep pushing until she saw me reach the top, and I admired her for it.
I never felt like she pitied me or looked down on me for any of the things that I’d done – or that had happened to me – in my life. She was just there to help pick me up, dust me off, and send me on my way again. Rooting for me to do better, be better.
And I was.
I had a light heart and a skip in my step as I was about to go into the office, but I stopped short before I walked through the door. The last thing I thought I would see was two police officers. They were putting handcuffs on Chad and talking to the principle at the same time.
Our principle, meanwhile, was doing his best to answer questions and give the police information on Chad’s parents. But, the sight of him in handcuffs made me feel sick. I could only imagine what he must have done now to be getting arrested, and I was glad he didn’t have anything to do with me anymore.
I knew he was the kind of guy to stay away from, but to think that he would do something so bad the cops would show up at the school was enough to make me taste bile. I was glad that we had only been on the one date, and ever since then I’d and next to nothing to do with him. The last thing I needed was more drama at school with all I was trying to do now.
I was ready to move past all this and be on to greater things. Chad was just another memory I would be more than happy to forget as soon as possible.
I felt the best thing to do would be to wait outside the door for the cops to get him out into the hall. I didn’t want to get involved in the situation, and I really didn’t want to talk to Chad. Not that I felt that he could, anyway. For all I knew, when you got arrested, you weren’t supposed to say anything.
But, when Chad saw me, he either ignored the rules, or didn’t know them. He unleashed.
“Are you happy now? I finally get back here
and try to catch up on all the school I missed because of you, and you go turn me in! How dare you? Where do you get off on doing this to me!” he snapped.
“I recommend you be quiet,” one of the officers said to him as they walked him down the hall. “Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.”
Chad was still arguing with the cops on his way down the hall and through the door, but I was shell-shocked. I hadn’t called the police on him. I hadn’t even thought of him at all in the past week. I was happy that he wasn’t in school, and that was about where my thoughts toward Chad ended.
what was he talking about when he said that I had gone and turned him in? I hadn’t even had any interactions with him outside of school except for that one night when he attacked me after our date, but Damon came in and broke that up, and as far as I knew, everyone who was aware of the incident kept it to themselves.
I made it clear to Abby not to tell anyone, and Peter, too. Damon was the only other person on earth who knew what happened, and he promised me before Abby and Peter that he wasn’t going to say anything. So how the heck did the cops find out, or was that even the night he was talking about?
Confused, I suddenly didn’t want to talk to the counselor anymore. I would talk to her when I got the chance, but right now, I wanted to find Damon. It was almost lunch time, but with the police in the front of the school and Chad yelling in the hall, there was a disruption in class, and many of the students were confused.
I pushed my way through the hall, muttering apologies when I ran into someone, but still pushing onward. I wanted to talk to Abby, but first, I had to talk to Damon. He would be more likely to know what was going on. He always managed to pick up on the gossip faster than anyone else I knew, and I hoped he’d have something to say about Chad.
Some of the students were outside watching as the police put Chad in the cop car. He was still yelling about how unfair the whole situation was, and shouting at the cops to call his parents before they took him down to the station. I almost felt sorry for him being in such a predicament, and in front of all the kids, too.
Almost.
They were going to talk about this for months, there was no doubt in my mind about that. And, for once in my life, all the drama I had gone through wasn’t at the front of their minds. I could just fade into the background over this one, and they could discuss Chad and what he must have done to be taken from school directly.
Was he going to go to jail? What did he do? Who turned him in? He shouted my name more than once, but I wasn’t the one who called the cops. I had no intention of ever dealing with Chad again, and I had no idea who called or why he was arrested. But, it had to be something bad, I was sure about that.
“Damon!” I pushed through two more students to reach him.
“Sutton!” he said. I could see stress in his face, and I grabbed his arm, pulling him to the side of the school. We were far enough away from the other kids we could talk in private, though I was sure everyone was watching me after Chad yelled out my name for the entire world to hear.
“What’s going on with Chad? What’s he getting arrested for?” I asked. “He started yelling at me in the hall and said that I turned him in, but I didn’t! I have no idea what he’s talking about, I just know I sure as heck didn’t call the cops on him!”
A pained look washed over Damon’s face and he put his hand on the back of his neck, scratching his scruffy hair. It was clear he didn’t want to tell me something, and I felt sick.
“Damon!” I said again. “What’s going on?”
“I called,” he blurted out. “Susan and Dean made me. They said that they were going to kick me out of the house and fire me from the board shop if I didn’t tell the cops what Chad did to you after you went out with him that night. I didn’t want to, and I did my best to keep them from doing this. I really didn’t think they were going to show up and arrest him right in front of everyone. Shoot, I didn’t think they were going to arrest him at all.”
“You did what!” I snapped. “How did Susan and Dean even know about that in the first place?”
“Susan asked me about it a while back. I tried not to tell her then, but then she got it out of me, and I told her you didn’t want to get the cops involved, but she told Dean, and it just got out of hand,” he explained.
But, I was seeing red. I felt betrayed, hurt. Damon had been the one person in my life I thought I could trust with anything. I thought I could tell him my deepest, darkest secret and he would keep it to himself. But instead, he may as well have gone and told the whole world.
I didn’t feel bad for Chad facing the justice for his actions, but I hated that I had to be involved in any way. I wanted it to just go away, and it nearly had before Damon had gone and opened his big mouth. Knowing that Dean knew made me madder than I had been in a long time.
I wanted to scream. I wanted to cry. I wanted to slap Damon right across the face and tell him exactly what was going through my mind. From the look in his eyes, I knew he was sorry for what he had done, but being sorry didn’t take any of this back.
He had betrayed my confidence, just like so many other people in my life. He had proven that he was just like everyone else, and there wasn’t anything I could do about it. I pulled back from him when he tried to pull me close.
“Sutton, I’m sorry!” he said. “Really! I am! Please don’t be mad at me! Please forgive me for this!”
There was a desperation to his tone, but all the feelings I’d kept inside for so long came rushing forward, and I didn’t want to be anywhere near him. I had long since learned no one could be trusted, and I thought Damon could be the exception to that rule.
But, he had just proven to me that he wasn’t the exception. He was just like everyone else, and I felt like an idiot for believing otherwise. I turned and stormed off, ignoring all his pleas for me to come back. I had no interest in talking to him. No interest in hearing any more of his excuses or what he thought were reasons.
I just wanted to be left alone.
Chapter 18
Sutton
I marched right back into the school, unsure of where I was going or what I was doing. I really didn’t want to talk to anyone now, not even Abby or Peter. Though I didn’t blame Abby for any of this, Damon had hurt me enough I didn’t trust anyone enough to talk to them. I didn’t want to talk to any of the school counselors about anything, I just wanted to disappear.
The rest of the students all seemed to be so caught up in what had happened with Chad, it was difficult for the teachers to get them back into class anyway. The principle was making announcements over the loud speaker, hoping to bring them back into the building and into class, but I had a feeling it was going to be chaos for the rest of the day.
And I wasn’t going to stick around and watch it unfold. The fact of the matter was that I really didn’t care to see any of it go down. I didn’t care where Chad was going, and I didn’t care what he was going to have to say or do to get out of this mess he was in. He was the one who had messed up, and Damon turned him in.
I really had nothing to do with any of it. I was the bystander the entire time, and I was willing to tell anyone who asked the truth.
But, I wasn’t going to sit through the rest of the day and try to hold it together. I felt like another of my deep, dark secrets had been aired for the entire world, and though Chad was the bad guy here, I still didn’t want the rest of the school to know what he had done – and what he had tried to do to me.
It was sick, I was the victim, and I didn’t want to be. I didn’t want to admit that any of it had really happened. Shoot, I didn’t even want to admit that I had agreed to go out with the guy in the first place. The fact of the matter was that he had pestered and pestered, and it was because of the encouragement of Damon and Molly at the time that I had even given him the chance.
It had proven to be a mistake from the beginning, and I was shocked that I even made it as far into the date as I did. Ho
w he managed to convince me to let him up into my room in the first place still baffled me, and how he had managed to get off without Susan ever hearing what had actually happened was also shocking.
Still, it was all in the past, and I thought it was going to stay there before now. Now, I had to worry I would be dragged to some trial, or I was going to be expected to press charges, or maybe Chad was going to get out and he was going to come after me in some way. I still didn’t trust him or Molly when it came to the bullying.
I paused, suddenly realizing that Chad was the one Damon blamed for ruining his bike. It might be fixed now, but did Damon really turn Chad in because of Dean and Susan? Or was it personal because of the bike? He was so angry when his bike got ruined after that party, and Chad was really the only person who made any sense for being the one behind the act.
There was the fight they had, but Damon had gotten suspended for it. Maybe he didn’t feel like he really got his justice out of the whole thing, so he went for something that was far more sensitive. If he were to accuse Chad of trying to rape me, Chad was bound to get in a lot more trouble than if Damon were to accuse him of being the one to break into the garage.
After all, with the high tech security alarm that the house had, it was still far-fetched to think that Chad, drunk as he was that night, would be able to get into the garage, destroy the bike, then get back out without waking anyone up.
Still, whether or not it had much weight, Damon was still convinced Chad was the one responsible, and he had likely come after him for that reason.
I shook my head. “Asshole.”
Going to my locker, I grabbed my books and shoved them in my backpack. I had had enough of this drama for one day, and I wasn’t going to try to work my way around the rest of the students staring at me for the rest of the day. I could work on my homework in my room and once again pretend like none of this ever happened.