* * *
“Pull it tighter, Rod,” Jerod yelled. He held on to one fence post, and Rod had the other end. The fence had been down that morning, broken through by a couple of rambunctious cows overnight.
As they got the fence taut, Jerod used a sledgehammer to bang down his post and then hurried to Rod and banged down that post. “Whew.” Rod grinned at Jerod. “Nothing like a little workout to start the day. You know, I’ve heard some of the other ranchers talking about coyotes lately. I’m wondering if one of them spooked the cattle last night.”
“That makes sense,” Jerod agreed. “Thank goodness we don’t have any calves to worry about right now. I might want to buy a couple of dogs come spring.”
“You know Caleb will want to keep any dogs you buy in the house with him,” Rod said.
Jerod laughed. “You’ve probably got that right.”
“He’s a good kid,” Rod said.
“Yeah, he is,” Jerod agreed. “I’m going to head out for lunch. Once you’re finished eating, I’d like you to start emptying out the gardening outbuilding. I want to trash anything that isn’t good in there.”
“Got it,” Rod replied.
“We’ll go through it all when I get back home. In fact, I’m going inside now to take a shower and then head out.”
“I’ll be here when you get back,” Rod replied.
Jerod headed to the house, and once inside he jumped into the shower. He had made plans to meet Mac for lunch at the café today, and he was eager to touch base with his friend. They had scarcely had a chance to talk to each other since the wedding. And Jerod was missing a little adult male time with a friend.
Once he had changed into a pair of clean jeans and a black-and-blue-checkered flannel shirt, he headed out the door. As he drove into town, his thoughts couldn’t help but go to Lily.
Three nights ago they had made love again, and it had been as wonderful as ever. Afterward she had fallen asleep in his arms, but the next morning he’d sensed a change in her...a withdrawal marked by her unusual quietness.
She didn’t appear mad about anything. She was just a bit withdrawn. He thought maybe the whole thing of her being cooped up inside the house was getting to her. In any case, he didn’t want to pry, and hopefully she would be ready to share her thoughts and feelings with him once again very soon.
This whole marriage stuff was hard work. After he’d run away from his mother, Jerod had spent most of his life taking care of and thinking only about himself. But since he’d gotten married, his thoughts were only for Lily and Caleb. He wanted to attend to both their physical and emotional needs. He wanted to make sure they were happy and safe. And while he was doing everything he could to keep Lily safe, he was afraid she wasn’t happy, and he didn’t know how to fix things for her.
He pulled up in front of the café and saw Mac’s truck already there. He was definitely looking forward to taking some time to visit with his friend. When he walked into the café, he was greeted by the scents of frying burgers and onions and myriad other things that made his stomach growl with hunger.
Despite the crowd inside, he immediately spied Mac in a booth toward the back. “Hey, stranger,” Mac greeted him.
“How are you doing, Mac?” Jerod slid into the booth facing his friend.
“The real question is, how is married life treating you?” Mac replied.
“It’s been good for the most part. You heard about Lily being attacked?”
“Yeah, I think everyone in town knows about it. How is she doing?”
“She’s pretty much healed up physically, but the threat of another attack hangs heavy over our heads,” Jerod replied.
“Does Dillon have anything to identify who’s after her?” Mac asked.
“Not a damned thing.”
“Well, that stinks,” Mac replied. “And we both know Dillon is damned good at what he does.”
“Agreed, It’s just that whoever attacked Lily didn’t leave any evidence behind.”
Both men turned as Carlee, one of the waitresses, appeared at their booth. She greeted them with her bright smile, took their orders and then left.
“So you and Lily don’t have any idea who might want to hurt her?” Mac asked.
“None. All I’m doing right now is basically acting like her bodyguard and keeping everyone I can away from her.”
“Is she working?” Mac asked.
Jerod nodded. “I’m taking her to work and picking her up every afternoon. I think she’s safe in public places, but I don’t want her to be out alone anywhere.”
“That’s a crappy way to live,” Mac said.
“Tell me about it,” Jerod replied drily. “So, tell me what’s happening at the ranch,” Jerod said, wanting to change the topic.
For the next fifteen minutes, he and Mac talked about the Holiday Ranch, and by that time their lunch orders arrived. “Are you seeing anyone?” Jerod asked between bites of his cheeseburger.
“No, I’ve pretty much given up on dating,” Mac replied.
“I just realized out of all the twelve of us guys who came to the Holiday Ranch around the same time, you’re the last bachelor standing.”
Mac laughed. “I guess you’re right. I think maybe I’ll always be a bachelor.”
Jerod frowned. “Why would you say that?”
Mac shrugged. “I don’t know, I’m just not sure love is in the cards for me.” He grinned. “I’ve got my guitar and the horses and the other ranch hands, and if that’s it, then I’ll be okay. I know why you married Lily. Is there any magic happening between the two of you? Are you falling in love with her?”
Jerod frowned and took a moment to eat one of his French fries. Was he falling in love with Lily? He wasn’t sure he knew what love was. Certainly it wasn’t anything he’d ever felt in his mother’s care. He’d never been in love before, so he had nothing to compare his feelings for Lily with.
“I definitely care deeply about her and Caleb. But to be honest, that’s a question I haven’t really asked myself. I do know I’m happy where I’m at,” he replied. “And I can’t think of anyplace else I’d rather be.”
“At the end of the day, I guess that’s all that’s important,” Mac replied.
“So, tell me what’s going on at the ranch. The new hires still working out okay?” Jerod asked.
“For the most part. Cassie hired on another guy two weeks ago. His name is Brett Davis, but I don’t think he’s going to be around for long.”
“Why not?”
“I think the man has a bit of a drinking problem. Several of us have noticed he smells like booze first thing in the morning.”
“Cassie won’t stand for that. She and Sawyer have a strict no-drinking-while-working policy,” Jerod said. Sawyer Quincy had been one of the original twelve cowboys and he now worked as the ranch foreman.
“Exactly. Sawyer has already mentioned it to Cassie, so I have a feeling Brett’s days at the ranch are numbered.”
The two visited for a while longer, and then it was time for Mac to get back to the Holiday Ranch and the rest of his workday. The two stepped out of the café, and Mac headed in one direction and Jerod turned in the opposite direction. He nearly bowled over Donna Maddox, the woman he’d dated several months before he’d married Lily.
“Whoa,” he said and grabbed her by the shoulders to steady her. “Hi, Donna.”
“Jerod,” she greeted him with a warm smile. “You’re looking well. Married life must be agreeing with you.”
“It is. How are things with you?”
“Going well, thank you. I’m definitely keeping busy at the dress shop. I’ve started seeing a new man from Oklahoma City, and it’s going very well.”
“Good, I’m glad for you, Donna,” he replied. She was a nice woman, and he hoped she found the love she’d been looking for. He just couldn�
��t imagine her being a suspect in the crimes against Lily.
They said their goodbyes, and then he headed back to the ranch. As he drove, Mac’s unexpected question about him falling in love with Lily played in his mind.
Jerod had been so busy worrying about keeping Lily safe he hadn’t had an opportunity to examine the depth of his feelings for her. And he didn’t intend to do so now.
Besides, he had no idea what Lily thought of him. He had no idea if her desire was for him or so she could fulfill her end of the bargain by having a baby. Love had never been a requirement of the marriage, and he’d never believed himself lovable material. His own mother hadn’t loved him...so why would any other woman?
He wasn’t sure he’d know love if it bit him in the butt. Sometimes he found Lily looking at him in a way that made him want to fall into her soft blue eyes. Was that love? And sometimes he gazed at her, wanting to know her thoughts, everything about her past and her hopes and dreams for the future. Was that truly love?
He shoved all these thoughts away, and for the rest of the afternoon he worked with Rod to clean out the old and broken tools from the gardening shed.
Once again that evening over supper Lily was unusually quiet, and he wished he could figure out what was going on in her head. Was she somehow regretting this whole marriage idea? Had she changed her mind about having a baby and was afraid to tell him?
Finally Caleb was in bed, and it was just the two of them sitting in the living room when Jerod finally got up the nerve to ask Lily what might be bothering her.
“What makes you think anything is bothering me?” she asked.
“You’ve been unusually quiet over the past couple of days. What’s going on? Have I done something wrong?”
“No, not at all,” she assured him. She then drew in a deep breath. “Some of my teacher friends are going out Friday night to the Watering Hole, and for the first time in a long time, I’d really like to go with them. In fact, I’m seriously considering it.”
He stared at her. What on earth was she thinking? “Lily, you know you can’t do that.”
She raised her chin, and her eyes narrowed slightly. “Jerod, I’m tired of being a shut-in. I need to get out and have a little friend time.”
“Have you forgotten that somebody tried to kill you?” he asked her incredulously.
“Of course I haven’t forgotten it, but right now I’m feeling like they succeeded. If I can’t go outside to spend time with you and Caleb and I can’t spend time with my friends, the person who tried to kill me has already stolen my life.” Tears filled her eyes. “I’m so tired of it, and I just want to go out Friday night for a little while.” Her tears ran down her cheeks.
God, he hated to see her cry. Her obvious unhappiness stabbed him through to his very soul. “Hey...hey,” he said softly and gathered her into his arms. “Don’t cry,” he murmured against her ear.
She wrapped her arms around his neck and cried into the crook of his neck as he rubbed a hand up and down her back in an effort to comfort her. She wept for only a couple of minutes and then backed away from him and swiped the tears from her cheeks.
“I’m sorry,” she said.
“Don’t be. I know this has been frustrating for you.”
“It’s gotten to be beyond frustrating,” she replied. Once again she raised her chin. “I’m going to go, Jerod.”
“Maybe if I drive you and then pick you up, it will be okay,” he said, wanting to make her happy despite being afraid for her.
“No.” She shook her head. “I can drive myself there and home. My friends will keep me safe, and I’ll probably only stay for an hour or two. All I need from you is to be here with Caleb.” Despite the tears a moment ago, her chin was raised once again, and she now looked strong and determined.
“You know that’s a given.” He frowned thoughtfully. “If you insist on driving yourself, then I’d feel better if you drive my truck. That way people would just assume I’m behind the wheel and not you.”
“I can do that,” she agreed. She then leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek. “Thank you, Jerod, for understanding.”
“I’d still feel better if I could get some bubble wrap for you,” he replied, grateful when she laughed.
Two hours later he lay in bed next to her and stared up at the darkened ceiling, worry rolling around in the pit of his stomach and making it impossible for him to sleep.
He couldn’t even begin to think of all the things that might go wrong with Lily going out on her own. He tried to tell himself she would be fine. She’d be in a public place with friends who supported her and would look after her.
Still, he wouldn’t sleep peacefully again until Friday night had come and gone and Lily was back home safe and sound.
Chapter 10
“I can’t believe you’re coming with us tonight,” Carol said Friday morning before school started. “I was starting to feel like Jerod was never going to let you out of his sight again.”
“He’s just been overly cautious since the attack,” Lily replied.
“You know I haven’t really asked you much of anything about that because I didn’t want to upset you. So, since you’re coming out tonight, does that mean Dillon finally made an arrest?”
“I wish, but no. We don’t even have a suspect.”
“After all this time? That’s stinks,” Carol replied.
“What stinks?” Krista walked into the classroom.
“That Dillon doesn’t have any suspects in Lily’s attack,” Carol replied.
“That totally stinks,” Krista said and then smiled at Lily. “But you know all your best friends will protect you tonight with our lives.” Krista fell into a fighting stance with her hands in fists.
Lily laughed. “Don’t you know I’m counting on that.”
“We’re going to just have a little fun and a few laughs tonight. It will be good for all of us to kick back and relax together,” Carol said. “It’s been a while since we’ve all been out.”
“Is Regina going to make it?” Lily asked. Regina Fairbanks, one of the first-grade teachers, was usually a fourth when they all went out. She was happily married and had a two-year-old son.
“She’s definitely in. She told me a little while ago she couldn’t wait to have a little time to herself to escape her son’s terrible twos,” Krista said.
At that moment the school bell rang to start the day, and Krista and Carol scurried out of Lily’s classroom to head to their own. Although Lily had put on a brave face in front of her friends about the night to come, she definitely felt a little bit of trepidation.
She probably wouldn’t have made plans to go tonight if she hadn’t felt the need to get a little distance from Jerod. The last time they’d made love was when she’d realized the complete and utter depth of her love for the man she had married.
Love was never supposed to be part of this bargain...this...this marriage of convenience. She had certainly hoped she could come to care for and respect Jerod, but she hadn’t considered that she would fall completely and hopelessly in love with him. She had truly believed that Cody’s betrayal so long ago had made her immune to ever loving again.
She wished she could talk to her friends about her confusing feelings, but she and Jerod had started this marriage on a lie. Now it was too late...too embarrassing to go back and tell her friends the truth about everything.
Throughout the day her mind continued to attempt to work through thoughts about her marriage, her feelings for Jerod and wondering about his feelings for her.
It was going to be difficult to love him, to want all of him...his thoughts, his dreams and his touch, and know that he wasn’t in love with her. Could she live with that? She honestly didn’t know.
And yet there was Caleb, who loved Jerod like a father. Her son had bonded to Jerod in a way she also hadn’t expected.
And Jerod seemed to love Caleb. The time Jerod spent with Caleb had cleared up the anger issues that had worried her about her son.
Yes, she could live in a loveless marriage for Caleb’s sake. It might be painful, it might feel empty, but she would do anything to make her son happy. And having Jerod as his father definitely made Caleb happy.
Maybe getting out of the house tonight to have a drink with her friends would help to clear her mind. She knew she was taking a chance going out, but she would be in public, surrounded by her friends, and she truly believed the risk of anyone coming after her was minimal.
The day passed, and before she knew it, school was over and Jerod was in the parking lot to drive her and Caleb home. “I know you and Krista are going out tonight,” Caleb said the minute they were in the truck. “So, can Henry spend the night with me?”
“That’s not a question to ask me,” Lily replied. “That’s up to Jerod. He’s the man in charge of things tonight.”
“That sounds fine to me,” Jerod replied. “While your mother is having a ladies’ night out, we can have a boys’ night in.”
“Cool. Henry already talked to his mom, and she said it was okay,” Caleb said.
“I’ll call her when we get home and we can figure out the arrangements,” Lily said.
At five thirty they all rode together to Krista’s place to pick up Henry. On the way back home, the two boys chattered nonstop about their plans for the night.
“Are you sure you’re ready for this?” Lily looked at Jerod in amusement.
“I think I can handle it,” he replied with a grin. His grin faded. “But you know I won’t be happy until you’re back home safe and sound tonight.”
“I’ll be fine,” she assured him. “I’ll be in public with friends, and I can’t imagine anything going wrong.” She reached out and put her hand on his strong forearm. “Don’t worry, Jerod.”
The Cowboy’s Targeted Bride Page 15