Brand New Man

by Weston Parker

I followed and Laura looked back at me over her shoulder, a small smile playing on her lips.

  We emerged in the kitchen, which was decked out in full Christmas mode, only to find Hayden and Keith bent over the turkey.

  Both of them came over and gave us a hug.

  Keith held Laura at arm’s length when they broke apart. “It’s so good to see you, Laura. You’ll have to catch us up on everything going on in your life. Max has told us you’re involved with some pretty incredible things. It sounds like you’ve become an amazing woman. Not that you weren’t already amazing when we met before.”

  “Are you kissing my ass so you get invited to some of my events, Keith?” Laura asked playfully.

  Keith threw his head back and laughed. My sister and Hayden laughed too.

  And that was why I loved her.

  She lit up the room. She made people laugh. It was second nature to Laura to say the perfect thing at the right time in order to bring joy to everyone around her. Including me.

  I paused and looked over to Laura as she accepted a glass of wine from Hayden. My brain had just caught up with my thoughts.

  I was in love with Laura Wessex.

  “Max, you want a glass of wine?” Hayden asked.

  I nodded. “Fill her up.”

  Hayden handed me a glass of wine and we all stood around in the kitchen and talked. Laura told them everything about her foundation and her plans to open the children’s home. I listened attentively, feeling blessed just to be in her presence. I caught my sister looking over at me a few times but ignored it. My attention was focused on my girl.

  We moved to the dining room table when dinner was ready. By that time we’d all had at least two glasses of wine. Conversation flowed effortlessly and laughter floated through the room almost in tune with the Christmas songs playing in the background.

  Before any of us dug in to the feast Keith cleared his throat and lifted his wine glass. “Here’s to a very Merry Christmas with family and friends. And to our beloved Valerie, who I know would have been overjoyed to see her boy sitting here with Laura by his side. She is in our hearts today. Merry Christmas, Valerie.”

  “Merry Christmas, Mom,” I said under my breath before sipping my wine.

  Laura reached over and rested her hand over mine on my knee. She gave it a squeeze before saying, “Valerie told me once that she started her Christmas shopping in July. Is that true?”

  Keith chuckled and nodded. “Quite true. I think she bought Catherine a Christmas gift three weeks after Christmas one year and hid it in the back of our closet for eleven months.”

  “Really?” Laura asked, her eyes widening with surprise. “And I thought I over prepared for the holidays.”

  Catherine shook her head. “Nobody’s got anything on my Mom. She started her Christmas lists on the beach in the summertime.”

  “I love it,” Laura giggled, looking around at the others. “Tell me more.”

  So they did. We all did. We shared stories about my mother preparing Christmas dinner. We told her about the time she burned the turkey and locked herself in the bathroom to cry for twenty minutes while Keith scrambled to cut off all the charred pieces of the bird. We told her about our mother staying up into the wee hours of the morning to bake enough Christmas cookies to send me and Catherine off to school with enough for all the other kids. We told her about how my mom had a massive pair of men’s boots she would wet the soles of and walk across the living room carpet with to convince me and Catherine—and later, Hayden—that Santa had been in our house on Christmas Eve.

  It worked every time.

  Sharing the stories lifted a weight off my shoulders I hadn’t known was there. Talking about my mother so openly felt good. Like therapy. And, for the briefest moment, when everyone was laughing hysterically and tears were stinging the corners of my eyes, I realized that for the first time since I was a kid I was feeling Christmas joy. And even though my mother was no longer with us, she was still a part of it.

  And it was all Laura’s doing.

  As I sat beside her and listened to her laughter, I knew I owed her a debt I could never repay. She had saved me from another Christmas filled with misery and grief. She’d showed me how to see the good that remained. There were still people here I loved and who loved me, and we had all lost my mother.

  Now we were finally at a place where we could remember her and smile. And it felt good.

  Finally, I felt like myself again.

  Chapter 34

  Laura

  I curled one leg under myself in the corner of Keith’s chestnut brown sofa. I had the prime spot right in the corner of the sectional, and as soon as my ass hit the cushion Max had pulled the red blanket on the back of the sofa down and draped it over my lap.

  We were all sitting around with our mugs of eggnog and rum. It smelled like mulled spices in the house and the feeling of contentment was heavy in the air as we all sat near the Christmas tree swapping holiday stories.

  Catherine was sitting on my other side. She was telling a story of her favorite Christmas as a child, and was so animated she had to put her eggnog down for fear of spilling it. “I woke up at five in the morning that year. I was—I want to say six or maybe seven. That prime age when Christmas is the most exciting. I got out of bed and opened my bedroom door, which was a huge no-no. On Christmas morning we were supposed to stay in our bedrooms until seven o’clock. Then we could go wake Mom and Dad up so they could make their coffee. We were absolutely not allowed to set foot in the living room until coffee was made and the adults were ready to face the day.”

  I couldn’t stop myself from giggling. “That sounds like sheer torture for a child.”

  “It was,” Max chuckled beside me.

  Catherine grinned at us. “It wasn’t that bad. I mean, looking back I see why Mom had it as a rule. It made the morning last longer. And it taught us patience.”

  “So you opened the bedroom door?” Hayden encouraged, wanting to hear the rest of the story.

  Catherine nodded and picked it up from there. “Yes. And I listened carefully to make sure they were still sleeping before I went down the hall to Max’s room. I let myself in, only to find that he was already awake. He had his bedside lamp on and was reading a book to pass the time. Do you remember, Max?”

  Max smiled before taking a sip of eggnog. “I remember.”

  “I tried to talk him into sneaking downstairs with me. Just to get a look at the Christmas tree and all the presents Santa left. But Max wouldn’t have any of it. He refused to go down there, and he told me if I went without him he’d wake up Mom and Dad.”

  “What a tattle tale,” Keith snickered.

  Max didn’t say anything. He watched Catherine with a faint smile on his lips as she stared at the Christmas tree before us. Her eyes were alight with all the colors and her cheeks rosy from the wine and the rum. “When I tried to drag him out of bed he took me by the arm, looked directly at me and said that Mom and Dad would be so sad if I spoiled the surprise by looking when they weren’t there.”

  My eyes wandered over to Max. He was looking down at his lap and I could feel him sifting through his own memories and lingering on that one. “Mom would have known you were faking it if you’d seen it before she came down with us.”

  “She would have,” Catherine nodded. “And, once I understood why I had to wait, Max pulled me up onto his bed and read me stories to pass the time. For two hours. He never once complained. He just did it.”

  “That’s so sweet,” I said, leaning my head back against the sofa cushions.

  Catherine laughed. “Yes, that was one of his sweet moments, for sure. But there are other Christmas stories where he tried to steal my presents. But you know, that’s just how siblings are.”

  “For the record, I wasn’t trying to steal your presents. I was trying to steal one present,” Max said, holding up a single finger. “I didn’t want the crap Santa brought you. Barbie’s and dolls and clothes. I only wanted—”

>   “My movie player.”

  Max nodded. “Precisely. It was the coolest thing. It was like a mini laptop that you put a DVD in and it played your movie. The battery life barely lasted through a full film, but I thought it was so cool. After we fought over it for ages, I finally got my own.”

  “Courtesy of Keith,” Catherine said, nodding to her stepfather.

  Keith shrugged a shoulder with a nonchalant grin. “I needed an in with Max when Valerie and I first started seeing each other. We’d been together for, I don’t know, eight months or so when our first Christmas rolled around. Valerie wanted to spend it together, but was worried about how the kids would take it. I was worried about Hayden, too. He’d spent his first eight years as an only child and now all of a sudden he was going to have to share his Christmas with two other kids. I sort of bought Max off with the DVD player.”

  “It worked,” Max said.

  We all laughed, and then Keith said, “Sort of. It at least got my foot in the door.”

  I finished off my eggnog. Max took the mug from my hands and leaned forward to put it on the coffee table. I thanked him by putting a hand on his shoulder and rubbing it with my thumb. I looked around at the others. “What was Christmas like when the five of you were all together?”

  They all turned to look at each other as if to decide who should answer. Catherine picked up the lead. “Honestly? They were pretty great. I mean, it was easier for me because I was younger than Max. So I got used to the new normal pretty quickly. Mom still kept all the same rules in place, even when we were teenagers. We couldn’t come downstairs to look at the living room and the wake up time moved from seven to eight.”

  “Ugh. I was used to getting up the minute I woke up and running down the hall to get my dad,” Hayden said, clicking his tongue. “Adjusting to Valerie’s way was not easy. I was an impatient kid.”

  “You came around to it well,” Keith said, rolling to his feet and patting his son’s knee. “I think we all came together and started some pretty special traditions. Hopefully, you’ll choose to pass some of them down to your families. That would be a really great way to honor Valerie’s memory.”

  Keith collected the empty eggnog mugs from everyone and nodded toward the kitchen. “I’m going to go get started on those dishes. You kids sit and catch up. I won’t be long.”

  Hayden stood up too. “I’ll come help you, Dad. I’ve spent enough time with these clowns.”

  We all erupted in playful harassment as Hayden followed after his father and shot us a goofy smile.

  It was just me, Max, and Catherine in the living room now. Catherine shifted around on the sofa so she could cross her legs and face me. “Were you able to talk to your parents today? Whereabouts are they right now?”

  “Yeah, they called this afternoon. From Spain.”

  “Spain?” Catherine repeated. “How lovely! Are they having the best time?”

  I nodded. “It sounds like they’re really loving every second of it, although my dad did say that today had been really hard for them. They were wandering the streets and seeing all the families together, and wishing they were here with me for the holidays. But, they’re already looking forward to next year and I think that’s the best way to look at it. Besides, I told them I was surrounded by good people today and that made him feel better.”

  Catherine beamed. “I’m glad you came.”

  “So am I. Seriously. Thank you all so much for making room for me.”

  Catherine stood up with a cheeky smile. “Oh, Laura. There will always be room for you here. Now, you two enjoy some alone time. It’s been a busy day. I’m going to make sure those buffoons don’t put any dishes in the dishwasher that specifically say they are not dishwasher safe.”

  “Try to keep them out of the rum while you’re in there!” Max hollered after her. “I noticed Hayden’s got a bit of a swagger to his walk that you and I both know isn’t natural.”

  We could hear Catherine’s giggles as she rounded the corner to the kitchen.

  I sighed and settled deeper into the corner of the sofa, inching my butt closer to the edge of the cushion. Max lifted my legs and draped them over his lap to run his fingers up and down my shins. Then he closed his hand over my socked foot and cracked my toes like he used to when we were at school. I giggled and pulled away, but he grabbed the other foot and did the same to that one. Even though I played like I didn’t like it, I secretly did.

  A yawn caught me by surprise and I covered my mouth.

  “Tired?” Max asked.

  “All of a sudden, yeah I am. Must be all the turkey, and the wine. And the rum. My goodness, it’s been a day of indulgence, hasn’t it?”

  “It’s been a good day.”

  “A wonderful day,” I said, twisting around to sit up and plant one knee on either side of Max’s legs. As I straddled him I cupped his face in my hands. “This has been my favorite December to date, Max.”

  He ran his hands up and down my back before letting them rest on my hips. “Mine too.”

  I listened to the clamor of dishes in the kitchen sink, and the sound of someone tearing tinfoil to cover the food. Hayden’s laughter cut through the room and then Keith and Catherine started to laugh too. Knowing I was entirely alone with Max for the moment at least, I leaned down and pressed my lips to his.

  He ran his hands up my back and sunk his fingers in my hair. I tasted spiced rum on his lips. I rolled my hips in his lap, feeling him grow stiff between my thighs. I chuckled into his mouth and he grinned. I nipped at his bottom lip and then kissed him there and on his cheek. “I’m so happy I could spend Christmas with you, Max.”

  There was so much more I wanted to say besides that. I wanted to tell him why it made me so happy, but I wasn’t quite willing to put words to my feelings yet. I really cared for him. Like, really cared. He was the first thing I thought of when I woke up in the morning after dreaming about him all night long. He was constantly on my mind throughout the day. I longed for his company as much as I longed for his body, and when I was with him the rest of the world faded away. I had never in my life felt as present as I did when I was with him.

  I knew what all these things meant. I was falling for him. As a matter of fact, there was a chance I had already fallen, and that scared the hell out of me. Now would be the perfect moment to tell him how I felt. Here, in the warm glow of the Christmas tree, with hearts as full as our bellies, was the perfect time. But I couldn’t do it.

  Not yet.

  Instead I said, “I’m proud of you, Max.”

  He cocked his head to the side as he tucked some of my hair behind my ear.

  Heat burned my cheeks as I smiled and looked down and played mindlessly with one of the buttons of his dark red shirt. “You’re a changed man. I’m sorry I was so hard on you when we first ran into each other at the fundraiser. I thought you would be the same Max you used to be. I was mistaken. You’re so much more than that.”

  The smile he gave me wasn’t the same one I’d seen on his face all day. There was something sad in it. But it was gone as soon as it appeared and he placed two fingers under my chin, lifting my face and guiding me to him to kiss my lips and the tip of my nose.

  My stomach tightened with anxiety. I was pretty sure I’d said the wrong thing. His sad smile had been brief, but I’d seen it, and something was bothering him. Afraid to make things worse I kept my mouth shut, except to take one more opportunity to whisper, “Merry Christmas Max.”

  He stroked my cheek with his thumb. “Merry Christmas, Laura.”

  Chapter 35

  Max

  There were three missed calls from Laura on my cell phone at ten-thirty at night on New Year’s Eve.

  She’d invited me to a party with some of her colleagues at the foundation, along with some of her other friends. Apparently there would be some people there from school who I might know. When she invited me the day after Christmas, I told her I’d go. But every day since then I’d wondered if it was the right move t
o make.

  Her words to me on Keith’s couch on Christmas Day had been stuck in my head ever since. She thought I was a changed man. She thought I was someone good. Someone who belonged in her life. And I could see in her eyes that she was falling.

  Just like I was.

  On her third call she left me a voicemail. As I stood in front of my living room window looking out at the city lights I lifted the phone to my ear. Her voice filled the speaker and in the background I could hear music and laughter. The party sounded fun.

  “Max! Where are you? I’m excited to see you. The party is well under way and people are looking forward to meeting you. You’re not going to believe it. They brought in live entertainment and a DJ. Please get here before midnight. I want you to be the person beside me when we roll into twenty-nineteen. Call me!”

  I deleted the voicemail with a sigh.

  I’d told her I would go, and therefore I needed to be there. I couldn’t no show on her. That would be a real dick move.

  So I called my driver and had him pick me up half an hour later, giving me time to change into a black on black suit and a pair of sleek dress shoes. I slicked my hair back, grumbled to myself about how I should have shaved my thickening stubble, and left the penthouse with a chip on my shoulder.

  The drive to the party was somber. My driver was quiet. He could probably sense the storm brewing in me and knew better than to ask questions. He dropped me off at the curb outside the house of the party’s host, and told me he’d be back whenever I needed a ride home. I thanked him, got out of the car, and stood on the sidewalk looking up at the house as he drove away.

  It was a typical modern LA home with sharp angles and big windows. A massive palm tree in the front yard was wrapped with white twinkle lights all the way up the curved trunk. Up on the roof, which was a massive patio, I could hear music and laughter. Lights danced around up there and I knew that was where Laura would be.

  I walked up to the front door and let myself in without knocking.

  The place was packed. People were all over the place; on the stairs, in the doorways, in front of the massive floor to ceiling brick fireplace in the middle of the grand foyer. I made my way up the stairs and cut a path down the hall to the second set of stairs that led up to the roof.