Doin' a Dime

by Vale, Lani Lynn

  Zach snorted.

  I, on the other hand, wondered if that was real.

  Did he actually shove the soap down his throat, or was that a joke?

  I looked at Zach, who wasn’t the least bit surprised, then looked over at my own husband.

  He was staring at me with a great amount of sincerity.

  Maybe it really was real.

  I shuddered and turned back to the doctor.

  “What do I need to look for during the night?” I asked.

  After Dr. Garrick explained, he left, giving Zach a wide berth.

  “I swear.” Zach grimaced. “That doctor is the biggest douche in the world. I’m honestly surprised that we’ve managed to spend any amount of time together without murdering each other.”

  My lips twisted into a smirk as I helped Hunt get back into bed.

  “Well then that makes two of us,” I admitted. “Because he doesn’t really like me either.”

  “What did you do to piss him off?” Zach asked as he took a seat at the end of the bed, picking Hunt’s chart up. “My guess is you contradicted him in front of a patient… like I did.”

  I snickered. “That was it exactly.”

  “Got it in one.” I leaned farther into Hunt, who was now sleeping.

  “He looks pretty good other than that.” Zach put the chart back, then went back to staring at Hunt. “He was lucky. That could’ve been bad.”

  I knew it, too.

  “What was he thinking?” I grumbled.

  That was when Sin came into the room.

  I hadn’t seen him since I left him with my car in the parking lot.

  “That his wife, the woman that he loves beyond reason, has a hitman hell bent on taking her out for a million dollars and he doesn’t like it,” Sin said as he stood in the doorway. “What’s that face for?”

  I frowned.

  “What?” I asked in confusion.

  He gestured to Hunt, who was once again awake.

  He was glaring at Sin and Zach.

  “She’s mine, assholes,” Hunt growled.

  Then I was in between him and the bed rail.

  My lips twitched as I tried to find a more comfortable position that didn’t have my lower back digging into the rail, and I wasn’t lying on any wires or tubes.

  “She’s all yours, man.” Sin held up his hands. “I have my own anyway.”

  Zach’s eyebrows lifted. “Do you?”

  Sin scrunched up his nose. “I do.”

  And he didn’t sound very happy about it.

  “Sin has a baby mama,” Hunt sang. “Sin’s gonna be a dadddddyyyyy.”

  Sin narrowed his eyes at Hunt. “Hunt…”

  Hunt grinned wickedly before closing his eyes. “Yep. Daddy. Dad. Father. Antonym for mommy. That’s what you’ll be.”

  Sin stood up. “How do you know?”

  Hunt scrunched up his nose. “I know everything. Everything. Anything you say or do online is always going to be there for everyone to see. I totally stalked your girl. She was talking to an old friend online about how she was pregnant. Meant to tell you, but then this.”

  He pointed at his head as if what had happened was just a minor inconvenience instead of a head injury that had the possibility of turning into a major one involving surgery.

  “Fuck.” Sin pinched the bridge of his nose.

  Without another word to Sin, he turned his head to me. “I want you to have the same name as me. It makes me want to punch people in the face with my Hulk fists when I hear them call you by your maiden name.”

  My lips twitched.

  “I’d just like you to know that it’ll take me like, two minutes, to change your name everywhere. Say the word, and it’s happening.” His head lolled to the side, making me soften.

  “I’d like that,” I whispered.

  “Done.”

  Then he fell asleep.

  I looked at Sin and Zach. “Okay. Now, go fix this hitman problem. Then we can work on Sin next.”

  Sin looked like he’d rather run as far away as possible.

  “I think we can handle that,” Lynn drawled from the doorway. “Only problem is, the guy’s dead. Along with his two companions.”

  My mouth fell open.

  “What?” I shrieked.

  Hunt stirred in the bed, his eyes coming partially open before closing all over again.

  I ignored him and focused on Lynn.

  “Your aunt paid a visit. Apparently, she’s really good with a pistol. Video surveillance shows her shooting them all in quick succession from the landing.” Lynn shook his head. “One less opponent that we have to worry about, but sadly, the old one we had just became a lot more dangerous,” Lynn explained.

  His explanation made my mouth fall open in horror.

  “My aunt shot three men?” I gasped.

  Lynn nodded. “She did. She was ‘disguised’ but she wasn’t disguised enough. I was at the gas station retrieving Hunt’s bike when I saw her vault the fence between parking lots. Curious to see what she would do, I followed her. Turns out, she’s a cold-blooded killer.”

  “You just let her get away, boss?” Zach wondered.

  Lynn gave him a ‘look.’

  “No.” He shook his head. “I followed her here.”

  My back stiffened.

  “Where here?” I asked carefully.

  Lynn pointed at the room across the hall.

  “Apparently, while she was playing track and field, she hurt her ankle.” He pointed at the room across the hall. “She’s in that room right there.”

  I couldn’t believe my ears.

  “You’re shitting me,” I blinked, getting up and looking out.

  Sure enough, that bitch was in the room across the hall from me.

  “So not only did she kill the hitmen that she paid to take a hit out on me,” I said carefully. “But she sprained her ankle, went to the same hospital that I’m at, and is now right across the room from me, not able to run away?”

  “That’s right,” Lynn confirmed.

  I looked at the four men—Hunt who was now very much awake and tracking way better than he had been before.

  “I need a phone.”

  CHAPTER 21

  It’s called ‘brunching’ because ‘epic day-drinking shit show’ doesn’t accurately reflect the adults we pretend to be.

  -Text from Wyett to Six

  HUNT

  My head throbbed like a bitch, but walking my girl through hacking into her first phone? It was priceless and worth the headache that it was giving me.

  “What now?” she asked softly.

  “Now we plant a few ‘seeds’ of curiosity, make an anonymous phone call to the police about a noise disturbance, and wait for the magic to happen.” I rubbed my temple with one hand.

  Man, my head sure did hurt.

  “You can take your pain meds now,” she suggested, softly placing her cool hand on the other side of my head from the one I was holding.

  “No,” I grumbled. “I can’t think straight with that shit running through my veins. When you don’t need me anymore, then I’ll take something. In the meantime, I’ll just deal with the other shit.”

  She rolled her eyes. “You’re stubborn and bull-headed.”

  “Maybe,” I agreed. “But I don’t want to fuck up this perfect opportunity your aunt has given us.”

  She sighed.

  “True enough.” She looked around. “Okay, what’s the next step?”

  “Now we wait for the fireworks.” I closed my eyes and willed my brain to stop trying to force its way out of my head.

  I don’t know how long we stayed like that.

  A half hour. Maybe more.

  But I knew the moment that the police had finally arrived at the ER.

  “Your doctor is talking to the police,” Wyett said from the doorway.

  Lynn snorted and got up, not bothering to try to hide his presence as he stood and blatantly eavesdropped.

  “What’s going on
?” Sin asked from his spot next to my bed.

  He’d moved over slightly, making room for more and more of the Souls Chapel Revenants until my entire room was bursting with them.

  There was Bruno, Trouper, and Sin on one side with Lynn, Laric, Laric’s new dog, Revolver, Zach and Trick on the other.

  Up until a few minutes ago, my lovely, curvy wife had been sharing the bed with me while I’d helped her work magic.

  Now she was gone, and I found that my head hurt even more. Who knew having your wife’s body pressed up against you was the cure-all for anything and everything that ailed you?

  Speaking of my wife, she started to move out the door, but halted when she heard my voice.

  “Where are you going?” I asked when she put the phone down.

  “I want to talk to her before they take her away,” she said as she started heading toward the nurses’ station, determination in each step she took.

  I got up and followed her out, my head throbbing and pounding with each step I took in her direction.

  I was fairly sure that my ass was hanging out of the back of my gown, too, but I only made a half-assed effort to keep it closed because apparently, I was extremely unstable and still woozy. Meaning that I needed the wall and every available surface to keep me standing in the upright position.

  The moment that her aunt saw Wyett, she hissed.

  “What are you doing here?” she snapped, looking angry and a little bit scared.

  She should be scared.

  The bitch.

  She’d definitely dug her own grave with this one.

  Not only had she been a bitch all her life, but she’d also made Wyett’s life a living hell. Starting with killing her parents.

  Needless to say, there wasn’t one iota of guilt in my veins as I watched her struggle with what to do next.

  The cops were crowding her close, not arresting her officially yet, but definitely asking questions and gearing up toward that.

  Her aunt just didn’t know any of that yet.

  She had no clue the hole that she’d dug.

  And with each question she answered, the deeper she went.

  “Ma’am,” the police officer said. “Where were you around an hour and a half ago?”

  Stella wrinkled her nose. “I was, um, here?”

  “Security cameras show you arriving at the hospital only forty-two minutes ago,” the second officer said. “Where were you before you arrived here?”

  Stella swallowed hard. “Oh, driving around?”

  I snorted. “How about you just tell everyone the truth?”

  The officer settled his eyes on me. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “I work in the analytical computer science field. And this woman is also suing my wife, her niece, for half of her estate. Let’s just say that I’ve done a lot of digging into their financials lately, and I know that she hired a hitman to kill my wife’s parents.”

  “That is why we’ve been trying to find her,” another officer came up, this one dressed in plain clothes. “Miss Villin, ma’am. You’re a hard woman to find. I’d love to ask you some questions.”

  “Not without my lawyer, you’re not.” Stella shook her head.

  “One will be appointed to you and meet you at the station.” The newcomer nodded. “Boys, please escort her there.”

  “But my ankle. It needs attention,” Stella tried.

  “Oh, please.” Wyett rolled her eyes. “You’re always putting on a show. I’ll bet it doesn’t even hurt that bad.”

  Stella’s irate eyes turned toward my woman, and I couldn’t stop myself from protectively coming up behind her.

  I may not be able to move fast right now, but I could protect my woman.

  “How do you sleep at night?” her aunt hissed. “Knowing that you put me out of my own house? Knowing that I’m sixty, and now I have to go get a job because of your selfishness? That I might go to jail?”

  My hand tightened on Wyett’s hip, letting her know without words not to say a word to her aunt.

  I knew she understood moments later when she nodded her head.

  Engaging in anything at this point would just bite her in the ass, I knew it.

  “You really want to know how she sleeps at night?” I asked with an imperceptible calm that made Wyett shiver with anticipation.

  “Yes,” her aunt hissed again. “I would love to know. Because I just can’t see how she does.”

  My grin was mischievous.

  “She sleeps with her panties off, to make it easier for you and people like you to kiss her ass,” I drawled, sounding civilized and calm, unlike the crazy storm I could practically feel vibrating my every muscle.

  Her aunt gasped in outrage. “That’s just vile.”

  “It’s not vile,” I disagreed. “She has a very kissable—and lickable—ass.”

  Stella roared in outrage. “Get out of my sight!”

  Wyett snickered, as did one of the cops.

  “I’d come over there and kill you right now with my bare hands if my ankle wasn’t broken.” Stella glared.

  “Actually” —Dr. Garrick came up with an X-ray in his hand— “there’s no break. Just a sprain. All you need is ice and rest.”

  “Perfect,” the newcomer officer said. “In that case, please help her out, boys.”

  And that was exactly what they did.

  Kicking and screaming, Stella went.

  The new officer turned toward Wyett and me with questions in his eyes. “Were you our anonymous tip?”

  I shrugged. “Maybe. Maybe not.”

  The officer shook his head.

  “My name is Lynch. If you ever need a job, or help, or anything really, possibly to give any more helpful tips, I’d love to hear them or have you.” He held out his hand and Hunt took it before releasing it as quickly as he could. “Have a good one.”

  With that, he was gone, leaving me swaying on my feet.

  “Let’s get you back to bed,” my wife whispered as she wrapped her arms around my waist.

  I leaned more heavily into her than I intended, causing her to grunt in surprise.

  “Damn, you’re heavy,” she grumbled.

  I grinned wickedly.

  “Sure am, aren’t I?” I griped. “Now, let’s talk about that name change. I don’t like you having the same name as a criminal who tried to take you away from me.”

  “Not that your other arguments weren’t good, and that I haven’t already agreed, but you just won me over with that one,” she mused.

  She was Mrs. Wyett McJimpsey, to the entire world, twenty minutes later.

  Two minutes after that, I took another hit of the good stuff and slept half the day away.

  CHAPTER 22

  I’m slowly losing my mind. But as long as I keep the part that tells me when I need to pee, I should be okay.

  -Text from Wyett to Hunt

  HUNT

  “Hunt!”

  I paused in what I was doing, my glasses perched on the edge of my nose, and turned toward the door.

  “Yeah?” I called out.

  “Come here!”

  The fear in her voice had me standing up despite being in the middle of coding and heading in her direction.

  I stopped in the doorway of the room she’d taken over for her office.

  “Yes?” I asked.

  “There’s a spider,” she whispered, pointing down near my feet.

  I blanched. “Ewww.”

  “Kill it!” she insisted.

  I shook my head. “I’m not wearing shoes. What am I going to kill it with?”

  Her mouth opened in outrage.

  “You have to find something to kill it with! If I move, it’ll run and hide, and I’ll never be able to live in this house again,” she cried.

  I nearly rolled my eyes.

  “Wyett…” I started.

  She leaned over and picked up a bottle of shampoo that was by her side.

  “Here, use that,” she tossed it at me.
>
  I rolled my eyes that time and leaned over, squishing it with the bottle.

  Only, a moving mass started to explode from the squished spider’s body, and all of a sudden the big spider morphed into hundreds of baby spiders.

  They spread over the floor like a cup of water being knocked over.

  They went everywhere, and all of a sudden, I realized that she was right.

  We’d have to move.

  She screamed and jumped toward me.

  I caught her mid-leap and twisted and turned, watching as the spiders disappeared into every crack and crevice in the bathroom that they could find.

  That’s when the dogs started barking.

  They’d followed us in, and I wasn’t sure if they were barking because of how we were reacting—I mean I was now standing on the toilet for Christ’s sake—or if it was because they didn’t like the spiders, either.

  Whatever the case, I was glad that they were here.

  “Kill them, puppies!” Wyett cried.

  They left the bathroom and didn’t look back.

  “So I was going to wait until later to tell you, but I was going to suggest we move into your old house.” I paused. “And sell this place.”

  She hesitated for all of two seconds before she said, “Let’s do it.”

  Her old house was just sitting there. Had been sitting there for going on a few years now since her aunt had started with her assholery.

  Though it’d been ‘sitting,’ it hadn’t been idle.

  I’d started over the last six months to fix it up in secret.

  A bathroom here, a bedroom there.

  At first, it was because before I’d gotten out of prison, I wanted to make sure that she had a beautiful place to return to if it took me longer to convince her to stay with me than I wanted.

  Then, after I’d gotten out, I wanted it to be a place where we could return to. A place where she could remember the good times she had there with her parents and not the bad she had with her aunt.

  Now, it was because we had motherfuckin’ spiders making their home in our walls.

  “I’ve always been terrified that a spider would crawl into my ear while I was sleeping,” I admitted, tightening my hold on her ass.