As much as she wanted to tell herself it’d been casual sex and nothing more, she knew that was a lie. She’d wanted Drakkal to stay, and he’d clearly wanted to stay, too. He’d made it clear what she was to him. Shay was the one holding him at arm’s length. Drakkal would gladly shelter her in his arms all night long, every night, and she…longed for that, too. She longed for more, but it scared the hell out of her. What if she allowed herself to care about him only to lose him? She couldn’t open herself up for that kind of hurt.
I already have.
Shay’s eyes stung. She grasped the edge of the counter and pressed her lips together, willing the sensation away.
I can take care of myself.
Yeah, Shay, you can. Nobody’s questioning that, you’ve got nothing to prove. But why make yourself and your baby struggle just to say you did it alone when there’s someone who gives a damn about you and the baby, someone who’s more than willing to help? Why be so damn stubborn when he wants you, and you know you want him, too?
Drakkal was nothing like her ex, Anthony. Drakkal wouldn’t betray her, wouldn’t abandon her; only death could keep him away, though she had the impression that even death would be leery to test its strength against Drakkal’s willpower. The Shay of a month ago would’ve called her a stupid, naïve little girl for believing in anyone so thoroughly. But Drakkal wanted her and her baby.
“Am I really considering his?” she asked herself. “Am I really going to take an azhera as my…boyfriend?”
The word boyfriend sounded so damn absurd, and she knew it wasn’t the right word.
Mate. He’d be her mate.
Shay let out a long, slow exhalation, and, unable to stand the pressure any longer, finally waddled to the toilet to relieve herself. Once she was finished, she stepped into the shower and washed, scrubbing her hair and body clean. When she probed her sex, she almost moaned at its tenderness—it was a pleasurable tenderness. She smirked.
Damn, he loved me good.
Once she finished and used the convenient glowing panels on the floor and ceiling to dry herself, she carefully squatted to retrieve the blanket from the floor and wrapping it around her body again. As she reached up to touch the door panel, her hand stilled.
What if I fuck this up? I’ve done so much stupid shit, hurt the only person left who loved me…
But she’d learned from those mistakes, hadn’t she? She’d grown since then, and she was determined to make this new life with her baby one worth living—one worthy of the parents she’d lost too soon. And of all the people she’d met, who better to try and build that life with than Drakkal? He was the sort of man who Shay’s dad, Captain Ryan Collins, would’ve liked—and that went a long way with her.
It helped that she really liked Drakkal, too.
Before she allowed doubt to rear its ugly head again, she pressed the control button, and the door whooshed open. She stepped back into the room. Drakkal was sitting on the edge of the bed, hunched forward with arms resting on his thighs. He met her gaze and lifted his brows in question.
“Last night was supposed to be no strings attached,” she said, moving closer. “You agreed.”
He sat up straight, bracing his hands on his knees. “No, I didn’t.”
Shay’s eyes dropped to his lap, where his cock—its deep red making it hard to miss against his tan and brown fur—protruded from his sheath, growing harder the longer she stared. She jerked her gaze back to his only to find the corners of his mouth curled upward in a knowing smirk; he’d already caught her looking.
“You did,” she said. “I told you what this would be when you came in, and you—”
Shay snapped her mouth shut as she reviewed her memory of their brief conversation, fighting through the haze of lust and pleasure that entirely overshadowed her recollection of yesterday.
No. He hadn’t agreed at all.
She narrowed her eyes but couldn’t stop the grin that spread across her lips. “Oh, you sneaky, sneaky kitty. You played me good.”
“Didn’t play you, terran. I just chose not to agree…and you didn’t stop me.” His eyes dipped, and though she was wrapped in the blanket, Shay felt his gaze penetrating the fabric, producing a trail of heat on her skin as it moved. He slowly smoothed his hands along his thighs, toward his pelvis.
“So you want this, then?” she asked, forcing her eyes up to his again—it was much harder this time. “You want me? As a…a mate?”
Drakkal nodded. Fire sparked in his emerald gaze, intensifying as his pupils expanded. “Fuck yes.”
“And this baby? Even though it’s not yours?”
“You are mine,” he said with unwavering surety, “so your cub is mine, also.”
Shay’s heart clenched, and her throat constricted around the sudden, heavy emotion flooding her. She tightened her grip on the blanket and dropped a hand to her belly.
Hear that, Baby? He wants you. He wants us.
Shay had been furious when Anthony had declared the baby wasn’t his and that he’d never have anything to do with it. He’d even said get rid of it. A painful sense of abandonment had come after her initial rage. She hadn’t cared about losing Anthony—he’d shown her once and for all how much of a deadbeat, cheating asshole he was—but she’d mourned the fact that her daughter wouldn’t have a dad. Shay’s father had been so wonderful, so loving, and she’d stupidly hoped that somewhere, buried deep in Anthony’s body, there’d been at least one selfless bone. She’d hoped that he would’ve given a shit about his own kid.
But none of that mattered now. What mattered now was the male in front of her—the male who wanted Shay and her baby.
Taking a deep, shuddering breath, she closed the distance between them, stopping only when she stood before him. Drakkal tilted his head back, ears perking. There was an eagerness in the way his tail moved atop the bed, an anticipation—and it mirrored the way Shay felt.
She reached out with one hand and ran her fingers through his mane. “So…we’re really doing this? We’re really giving it a shot?”
Drakkal covered her hand with his, stilling it, and stared into her eyes. “I want nothing more than I want you, kiraia. Maybe I’ve been stupid lately, but I’m not dumb enough to pass up a chance to have you.”
Heat flooded her core and overflowed to suffuse her body, right down the tips of her fingers and toes.
I want this. I want him.
She smiled and released her grip on the blanket, letting it slide down her body to pool on the floor. “Then have me.”
The hungry gleam in his eyes intensified as he raked them over her. He inhaled deeply, nostrils flaring, and fixed his gaze on her pussy. She knew he could smell her desire. He extended both arms, settling his hands on her hips—over the bruises he’d left the night before. That only turned her on more. With an oddly gentle firmness, he drew her closer until she stood between his thighs.
He slid his right hand up, his calloused palm gliding over her skin until he was cupping one of her breasts in his big, strong fingers. He leaned forward and sucked her nipple into his mouth. Shay moaned and delved the fingers of both hands into his mane, using it to pull him closer. His rough tongue abraded her nipple, sending strong currents of pleasure straight to her center. She tilted her pelvis toward him.
Drakkal slid his metal hand around to grasp her ass. Like the rest of him, that hand was a contradictory blend of hard and soft—the unyielding metal plates contrasting the thick padding on its fingers and palm, which had the slightest give to it.
Only after her sensitive nipple was tender and red did he release it, shifting his mouth to the other to lavish it with equal attention. The delicious torment left her quivering in need. Her breath quickened and grew ragged, and her pulse pounded as her arousal grew. She squeezed her thighs together, but it wasn’t enough to alleviate the hungry ache between them.
He withdrew his mouth from her breast, leaving her bereft and desperate for more, and moved his hands to her hips. When he guided he
r backward, her instinct was to resist—she only wanted to be closer to him—but he was too strong.
Drakkal drew his legs together. His cock was fully erect now, throbbing in the open air, with its head aimed directly at her and the knot at its base thickening.
He hooked his hands behind her thighs and lifted her suddenly, forcing her legs apart. Despite how awkward she felt with her rounded belly, Drakkal had plucked Shay off her feet with no apparent effort. He guided her legs to either side of his thighs as he pulled her toward him, positioning her astride his lap. His shaft pressed along her slit, hard and hot, and she felt his pulse through it; its every faint beat and tiny twitch produced a new twinge of pleasure low in her belly.
Shay looped her arms around his neck.
“You’re already mine, kiraia,” Drakkal growled.
He cupped the back of her head with his left hand, twining his metal fingers in her hair, and pulled her down into a scalding, claiming kiss. She parted her lips, and Drakkal readily accepted her offering. He ravished her mouth, demanding everything she had to give, and she succumbed to his savageness. Their lips molded to each other, their teeth nipped tender flesh, and their tongues moved in an intricate, sensual dance.
The kiss was reckless, punishing, masterful, and consuming.
It was everything.
Shay rocked her hips, sliding her slick pussy along his cock. Whispers of pleasure rippled through her. With every undulation, the head of his shaft stroked her clit, building her desire higher and higher and making her belly flutter.
Gripping his mane, she wrenched his head back, breaking the kiss. Drakkal snarled, but the sound ended with a grunt when Shay dropped a hand and clamped it around his shaft. Locking her eyes with his, she lifted her hips, guided the head of his cock to her entrance, and bared her teeth as she sank down upon him. “And you’re fucking mine.”
Shay’s sex welcomed him into its hot, tight embrace, taking him in so deeply that her folds were touching the uppermost portion of his knot. Drakkal hissed through his teeth, trembling with the immense wave of ecstasy that had erupted within him. The words she’d spoken—paired with the way she’d just taken him into her body—could be interpreted as nothing but a claim.
He’d claimed her last night. Now, she was claiming him, accepting their bond as mates. That alone was almost enough to make him come right then and there.
He curled his metal fingers in her hair, tugging her head aside to expose the bite mark on her shoulder while he kneaded the supple flesh of her thigh with his right hand. An approving rumble sounded in his chest.
“Leave your mark on me, female. Show me your words are true.” He lifted his chin and tilted his head to the side, baring his neck and shoulder as he guided her face closer.
Her little teeth clamped down over his flesh, and, though she didn’t have fangs, he felt her bite. The flash of pain sent a jolt straight to his cock. He growled and moved his hands to her hips. He refused to climax without giving her anything in return, and he was already dangerously close.
Without releasing her bite, she lifted her hips and dropped back down on him, again and again, and he used his arms to grant her movements new force. Each of her downward strokes brought a maddening blast of pleasure, and each upward slide of her pussy nearly stole his breath.
Her panting breaths were hot against his neck, and small moans tore from her throat each time he entered her. She slid her hands to his chest, clenched his fur in her little fingers, and, finally, released her bite. Drakkal shuddered, groaning as feeling flooded back to the mark she’d made. The resurgence of pain only heightened his pleasure.
“Look at me,” he growled between heavy, ragged breaths.
Shay drew back, and her half-lidded, lust filled eyes met his. She was beautiful. Her golden hair flowed around her, brushing over her radiant, flushed skin, and her pink lips were kiss swollen. Her full breasts bounced with her movements, teasing him with her well-loved, hardened nipples, and her muscles quivered all around him. Her oils coated his cock and thighs.
He lifted his hips as she came down on the next stroke, driving his cock deeper still.
“Oh, fuck—mmh!” Shay shuddered. Her eyelids shut, and her head fell back.
Drakkal caught her neck and jaw in his right hand, pressing the pads of his fingers and thumb against her cheeks, and forced her face back to his. “Look at me.”
Panting, she opened her eyes and met his gaze again.
“Do not look away, kiraia,” he said, punctuating his words by repeatedly driving her down upon him. “See me, and know I see you.”
“I see you,” she rasped, her body shuddering as her sex contracted, hungrily sucking him deeper. Her grip on his fur tightened. “And I fucking feel you.”
Drakkal’s breaths became erratic as pleasure rocketed outward from his cock, racing along his every nerve to set his body alight with overwhelming sensation, but he would not yet give in. “Who do I belong to?” he demanded.
Her eyes bore into his, glassy with desire but equally fierce as she bared her teeth. “Me.”
He quickened his pace, keeping his jaw clenched for several seconds before grating, “And who do you belong to?”
Her motions stuttered, and her moans escalated with every thrust of his cock. Her sex constricted around him, and her inner walls quivered as she came, producing a hot flood of her oils.
“You,” she cried. “Oh, fuck me. You!”
With a roar, Drakkal slammed her down a final time, forcing his bulging knot into her tight pussy. She gasped at the intrusion, her body tensing. He didn’t allow her to look away—didn’t allow himself to look away—as he came undone. He ground his thickening cock deep inside her as his seed burst from him, grunting and growling his satisfaction with each powerful spurt.
As the frenzy of their lovemaking died down, Shay relinquished her hold on his fur, glided her hands up to his shoulders, and slid her arms around his neck. Panting, she leaned forward and pressed her forehead to his. Her spasms eased into delightful shivers. Drakkal wrapped his arms around her and held her close.
Shay hummed contently, her eyes drifted shut, and her lips curled into a smile. She and Drakkal maintained their positions as they slowly descended from the new euphoric pinnacle they’d reached, as Drakkal’s body pumped all its seed into her—and as her body milked it from him. Warm and sated, Drakkal lapsed into thought.
He would never have believed this degree of contentment possible were he not feeling it now. Certainly, he’d longed for it since his youth, but life had suggested early on that it was unattainable, that he’d have to settle for whatever he could find instead—that he’d have to settle for what was realistic. Twenty years ago, he’d mistakenly thought he’d found that. He’d thought he’d found a mate…or at least as close to a mate as he’d ever have.
It was different with Shay, so different that there really was no comparison; this was it. This was what he’d truly craved, what he’d always needed. She was what he’d always needed.
Shay’s acceptance of his claim had been rapturous. Knowing that she was for him—and he for her—had so strongly cemented Drakkal’s purpose that it cast his entire life before finding her into doubt.
Long ago, he’d been forced to walk a path he’d never wanted any part of, and he’d spent a long time lamenting the choices stolen from him. He’d found friends along the way. Better than that, he’d found a brother he would never otherwise have known. But he’d never had reason to be grateful for the way things had gone. Not until now.
Not until Shay.
Each step he’d taken had brought him here, to her. He wasn’t certain of what he believed as far as ancestors and spirits, wasn’t sure of the truth behind reality and fate, but he could see now that all the hardships, all the suffering and pain, had made him into the person he had to become to find Shay. A month ago, all of it had seemed random, the results of an uncaring universe without discernable pattern, without any sense of justice, morality, or purpos
e. Now it all made sense.
Shay had given his past meaning it would otherwise never have held. She’d given him meaning. The years had shaped him into exactly what he needed to be for her—a protector, a partner, an equal.
For the first time in two decades, he had peace.
He had his true mate.
And if anyone tried to take her from him, he’d rip them to fucking shreds.
Sixteen
Shay stared at the security feeds and blindly dipped her fingers into the bowl of Kalatharian nuts Kiloq had left on the desk during his shift. She knew he’d done so out of kindness rather than forgetfulness—after trying them for the first time in the break room five days ago, she’d developed a crazy craving for the pale green nuts. Lately, the rest of the crew had taken to leaving bowls of them everywhere, making sure she always had access. She was touched by their thoughtfulness. It was especially appreciated while she was working—the nuts made a perfect movie snack, and her job had her staring at screens for hours and hours at a time.
Though she was forced to sit in one place for long periods of time, her job, thankfully, wasn’t always a boring one. The surveillance feeds from inside and immediately around the building were slow and uneventful, their monotony broken only by the occasional shift change or the arrival of a client, but the screens covered much more than that—Drak and Arc had eyes on all the surrounding streets, too, and those were always bustling no matter the time.
She’d seen fistfights and street performances, a foot chase or two, and had even spotted a couple pickpockets working their trade on the crowds. People watching had proven endlessly entertaining, especially when Shay didn’t even know the species of many of the people she was watching. Hell, she could have even had free porn if she wanted, given the frequency of unsuspecting couples who ducked into nearby alleys for quickies—though she suspected Drakkal wouldn’t have appreciated her watching those encounters. None of them could have compared to her mate, anyway.
My mate.
It’d been a week since she and Drakkal had made that claim, and though the word still felt strange—especially coming from a world of boyfriends and husbands—it was right. Happy wasn’t adequate to describe how she’d felt since then; it didn’t seem strong enough. She was exhilarated, contented, blissful…complete.
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