by Dawn Edwards
It was only an excuse, but it was what it was.
Lisa plucked the golden ticket from my hand, and wasted no time sliding it down my dick that she already had out of my boxer shorts. ‘Take your pants off,’ I instructed, but she was already halfway there. I pushed them all the way down to her ankles, turned her around, and slid a finger in and out, spreading her juices around to make my entrance easier for both of us.
‘You’re so wet.’ I lined my hard cock up with her already-wet entrance. ‘Are you sure?’
‘Please,’ she begged, and I didn't need any more convincing. I took her from behind, pushing in hard and fast.
‘Ahh,’ she let out sound between pleasure and pain. There had been no foreplay, no tenderness. Just an urgency for a release on my part.
I was quick, with no stamina due to my long overdue, self-imposed dry spell. It didn’t take more then a few thrusts and I was already feeling my spine tingling and my balls contract before I let out a loud moan, spilling into the condom.
I knew she didn’t finish and could tell she was disappointed, but I wasn’t prepared to do anything about it. It was a dick move, I knew that, but I also knew she’d just gotten what she’d been eyeing since the summertime.
‘I’ll last longer next time,’ I promised her, kissing her neck as I slid off the condom, tossing it in the trash before I pulled my pants up.
I had a feeling that she had been expecting me to take her back to my place, but instead, I drove her back to her parents' place, where she still lived. I kissed her goodnight from the driver's seat and promised to see her tomorrow.
CHAPTER 7
DREW
Things had started casually with me and Lisa, but after the night we fucked in the bar, she took it as a sign that we were an item. I enjoyed her company and the fucking wasn’t horrible, so I went along with it. I wasn’t in love with her, and I knew I’d never be. I tried, I really did, but losing Jessa had turned my heart to stone and no matter how much love another had to give me, it was impenetrable.
She was there for me leading up to and during the trial—when I was a complete nightmare to be around. The few days that I was in court to give testimony had really fucked with my head. When I came back to the Cape, I just went straight to her place. It helped that her parents often spent large chunks of the winter in Florida. I wasn’t with her just for our sex life, but for the times when I needed her company, and I needed her after the trial. The Cahills were a constant reminder of what I had lost, and Lisa offered me an escape that no one else could at the moment. Still, the guilt sat heavy in my chest, knowing that I’d never be able to give her what she’d eventually want from me.
She was a real support during those dark days when I had to relive everything all over again. One night in bed she asked me straight out if I had been involved with Jessa.
I shook my head. ‘No, but we spent a lot of time together. I got to know her and cared for her, she was a special young lady. Her death really affected me. I was so upset I couldn’t help her out of a really bad situation.’
‘You really are one of the good ones, aren’t you, Drew?’ she asked me, looking into my eyes.
I pulled her into me and held her, not able to act on what she wanted from me in that moment after talking of Jessa. It still felt as if I were being unfaithful to her by being with Lisa, and that was the guilt that was eating me alive.
We spent a lot of time together, as a result. I really got to know her, not only intimately, but her personality too. I picked up on her jealousy and insecurities early on. She always wanted to know where I was, when I was planning on stopping by or if I was hanging out with my friends, so long as it was at the bar where she could be with me also, she didn’t have an issue. The problems arose when I went to Boston or dared go somewhere else.
Having been single for a while, I wasn’t used to it. My ex Heather and I had our own lives, our own group of friends, and rarely interacted with each other’s social circles, so it was an entirely foreign concept to me, one I had a hard time wrapping my head around or really grasping the reasons why, other than jealousy or insecurity. One night at the bar, a group of college girls came in. It was clearly some kind of school break, as they were all, “Oh my gawd, I’ve missed you, like, so much.”
Joe and I were shooting pool in one of the back corners; his brother-in-law was there with his wife. Lisa came over often, eyeing up the only woman who was clearly married and likely as old as my mum. I didn’t like it.
I took her by the hips. ‘She’s a married woman, here with her husband, and you need to stop this.’
I thought I had been pretty clear, it hadn't been the first time I had to warn her off this behavior. I wasn’t going to take her insecurity and jealousy much longer. The college girls came over and started chatting us up. It was the middle of the week, and they were half in the bag.
‘Do you live around here?’ one the girls asked me, leaning into my personal space. I took a sidestep, reaching for my beer.
‘Yeah.’ I didn’t ask her about her residential status, as I didn’t care and, frankly, I just wanted to get back to the pool game.
‘Maybe you could show me later?’ she whispered.
I laughed at her, ‘That’s not going to happen.’
‘But you are like the hottest guy I’ve seen in ages, and that accent is like super sexy.’
I shook my head, still with a smile on my face. I can’t say I wasn’t flattered. ‘Sorry.’
‘Oh, come on, it will be fun. Why not?’ she was whining.
I turned her around to find Lisa making her way over to us from across the bar. ‘See that woman charging at us?’
The girl nodded, ‘So?’
‘So, that’s my girlfriend,’ I told her as Lisa appeared next to me. ‘That’s why not.’
The college girl looked Lisa up and down. ‘But I’m way hotter than she is.’
It was true, but I shrugged my shoulders and turned my back to her, pulling Lisa with me to the other side of the table, while she glared at the girls. ‘They are cut off,’ she spit out.
I kissed her, ‘Are we good?’
She wrapped her arms around me and nodded into my chest. ‘I’m going to be forever fighting girls off you.’
‘Not true, I can fend them off myself,’ I winked at her. ‘Like I just did.’
~
Easter was mid-April this year. It was my first real family holiday in America. The Cahills were heading to the Caribbean with Deb, and Breton wasn’t able to come home for the long weekend due to work. Which suited me just fine. I wasn’t sure I was actually ready for a family holiday yet—at least not with them.
I had been invited to spend the weekend with Lisa and her family off the Cape. I declined, but after many tears and arguments, it was easier to just give in and go with her in the end.
‘What do you mean no?’ Lisa yelled at me when I had initially declined.
‘I mean, we’ve only been together for five fucking minutes, and I don’t think it’s appropriate for me to be spending the holidays with you at some family member’s house I don’t know,’ I answered her in an even tone. I always kept my cool with her, someone had to, and I was coming to see that she could go from zero to sixty in no time.
‘Let me get this straight, it’s ok to move in together, but not for you to meet my family.’
I took a breath in. ‘I think meeting your relatives and staying at their house over a holiday weekend are two completely different things.’
‘You never stayed at your ex’s parent’s house?’
I rolled my eyes; she was starting to piss me off. Lately, her thing was to compare our relationship, if that’s what you wanted to call it that, to the one I had with my ex.
‘Of course, I did,’ I replied. ‘But I never stayed at her family’s house, and we’d dated for two years.’
‘How else are they supposed to meet you and get to know you?’ she started to cry. ‘Are you that ashamed to be seen with me?’
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‘Don’t start this shit again. If I didn’t want to be seen with you, I wouldn’t be, nor would I be fucking you. I think you know me well enough by now not to insult me like that.’
I rolled the mop back into the back room then grabbed our things.
‘I’ll see you tomorrow.’ I put my jacket on.
‘Drew,’ Lisa cried after me, grabbing my arm before I reached the door. ‘Please don’t go, I’m sorry.’
Despite not wanting to be here, to keep the peace between us, I gave in. I was spending Easter with Lisa and her family at her aunt's house off the Cape in New Bedford. It was a large house, with lots of extended family around. She felt it was a good way for me to meet the rest of her family, and given that we were going to be living together starting next month, she wanted everyone to know who I was.
While I had only wanted it to be slow and casual, she had other plans, and our relationship moved fast, physically. Emotionally, I had iron walls, which even her tears couldn't penetrate.
In terms of living together, she needed a roommate, and I knew I would need to move out of the house eventually. Many of my contracts were for the Cape and areas, but some would take me to Boston, and I was trying to line them up to coincide for logistics.
By the summer, the entire first floor would be completely finished, new windows and floors, kitchen, formal living and dining room along with a large first-floor bedroom with walk-in closet and en suite. Colleen said it could be considered a second master bedroom. I’d been busier than expected recently, and Lisa demanded a lot of my time. I’d told her things would really change come spring and summer, but she was relentless to allow me any freedom.
I was hoping that moving in might quell some of her doubts, but now I was the one doubting if I made a rash decision or not. My gut told me at the time not to, and it was a nagging feeling that had remained. If the Cahills wanted to rent the house out for the summer as a one-bedroom, they would be able to fetch a great price for it, and I didn’t want to hold them back from it. I had mentioned it to them and offered to post it on Airbnb and property manage it for the summer, but they hadn’t seemed receptive to the idea.
I hadn’t told them yet that I was moving out, I wasn’t sure how they would feel about it. I was pretty sure they knew about Lisa, however, they never mentioned her or invited her to join me whenever I met with them.
Lisa was all too happy to show me off all weekend. I felt like a show dog and I hated it. We were staying at her paternal aunt's house, who turned out to be a great host, and the entire extended family all welcomed me in. I felt like a bit of a gate-crasher at first, but by Easter Sunday I’d felt more comfortable with everyone.
We were at her grandmother's house for a big family dinner, a bunch of people were in the kitchen helping to clean up. I’d offered to help but was told to go sit down. There was a marathon of some home renovation show on TV, which, to be fair, wasn’t half-bad, and it kept my interest and that of the other men. The few kids that were there were running around, still hopped up on the chocolate that the Easter Bunny had brought.
Conversations were being exchanged, and I was happy to just relax, however, I kept thinking about jobs, checking emails, and last night, was on the computer in bed for a few hours finalizing some plans for a client to approve of. Lisa really didn’t understand everything that went into my job, that it wasn’t just about pushing some dirt around and making things look pretty. What pissed me off was that she didn’t really want to know, she just usually wanted me naked. It wasn’t an entirely bad thing; I just needed more substance in a relationship.
My phone buzzed in my pocket again. Breton had sent a new iPhone to me a few weeks ago. It had some new prototype software that his company had developed, but this one was no longer needed, and he always made fun of my old phone and felt sorry for me, I assumed. The case was practical for me too; top-of-the-line, waterproof, shatterproof and I was sure enhanced by Breton and his co-workers.
I dug it out of my pocket and looked at it; there was a text message from Breton.
BRETON: Did the Easter Bunny find you?
BRETON: Please tell me you’re eating so much chocolate and food that your six-pack is disappearing
DREW: That must be the Easter Miracle you’re wishing for
BRETON: Speaking of miracles, your other gift will arrive shortly.
DREW: I’m not home
BRETON: You think I don’t know that???
It didn’t surprise me, I was sure he had GPS on this device and could activate the camera remotely to spy on me.
DREW: Thanks, man.
I was speaking with one of Lisa’s cousins about something that had been on the show, as he knew what I did for a living, when my phone buzzed again. I’d been holding it and looked down when another text message came through.
There was no picture, but the preview said the message was from Cupcake.
I nearly dropped the phone. There was only one person I called that.
I was momentarily frozen in place, my finger hovering over the message, unsure what to do. Shaking, I finally clicked on the message
CUPCAKE: shhhh
CUPCAKE: Happy Easter, Drew
DREW: Is this a sick joke?
I stood up and excused myself, walking outside, not bothering to put on a jacket in the cool spring evening.
I had to text Breton back, ignoring the time difference. Things just didn’t add up and heads were going to fucking roll when I found out who was behind this.
DREW: Is someone playing a sick joke on me?
BRETON: Nope, Happy Easter! Jesus isn’t the only one who can rise from the dead.
BRETON: I don’t need to tell you that this is top secret.
Holy fuck…
I dropped to my knees on the sidewalk a few houses down from the one I had been at, my knees giving out. Standing up I ran a hand through my hair, pacing back and forth.
Wait.
Jessa was fucking alive. When my mind caught up I was clearly in some kind of shock.
No…
DREW: Seriously?
BRETON: Why the fuck are you still texting me, she wants to know if you’re pissed and ignoring her.
Fuck yeah I was pissed. But I was also elated, overjoyed, ecstatic and every other adjective that means happy. My emotions were running the gamete, and when I looked down to my phone it was through blurry eyes.
I was crying, but no longer tears of sadness, or loss, but tears of joy, of hope.
Jessa’s alive.
I wiped the tears away and held my phone in shaky hands. I needed to calm the fuck down, but how do you do that when you suddenly find out your purpose for living has been reinstated. That you are essentially being given a second chance at life, at love, at happiness. Because that’s what finding out Jessa was alive meant to me.
My life could continue, and not in the way that I had been existing. But it was like being hit by a train and spending months on life-support and suddenly waking up and walking out of the hospital as if nothing had happened.
I switched back to the other screen having felt a bunch of messages coming in and saw the moving lines indicating a message was being written.
CUPCAKE: I am sorry, but it was the only way to protect my family and myself. Breton and I have been busy working for the past few months. At some point, we can tell you everything, but right now, we can’t.
CUPCAKE: Drew?
CUPCAKE: Are you there? is it a bad time?
CUPCAKE: I’m sorry, I know how it looks and I promise I have a valid reason…
CUPCAKE: DREW?
DREW: Do your parents know?
CUPCAKE: Yes, they have known for a little while now.
DREW: Christmas?
CUPCAKE: Thanksgiving actually, are you mad at me?
DREW: I should be, but I think I’m still in shock.
CUPCAKE: Are you alone?
DREW: No, I’m with friends
CUPCAKE: Lisa?
Shit, Breton m
ust have told her.
DREW: Yes, sorry! Are you mad at me?
CUPCAKE: I have no reason to be mad at you.
CUPCAKE: I’ll let you get back.
DREW: No, please don’t go
CUPCAKE: It’s rude to be stuck to your phone, hasn’t Dad taught you anything?
She added an emoji sticking out her tongue.
DREW: Your dad’s taught me well, but I don’t care about anyone or anything else right now except you
CUPCAKE: seriously, I don’t want to keep you.
DREW: I’m currently standing on the side walk and before you messaged me I was sitting at an aunt’s house, watching HGTV with uncles and in-laws, while the kids bounce off the walls. She’s not near me at the moment and I’ll be ending it as soon as we are back on the Cape in the morning.
CUPCAKE: Drew…
DREW: Where are you?
CUPCAKE: On the other end of your phone. I’m not going anywhere but go back to HGTV, Mom says you need all the design advice you can get. I want a nice house to move back into.
DREW: That’s a low blow.
CUPCAKE: We’ll talk soon.
DREW: Like really talk? Can I hear your voice? See your face?
CUPCAKE: Maybe a Skype date, I’ll see what Breton thinks.
DREW: I miss you
CUPCAKE: Same here
DREW: Are you safe? Happy?
CUPCAKE: Safe yes, happy… I’m getting there, taking your advice actually and finding myself
DREW: I couldn’t be happier then.
CUPCAKE: You?
DREW: I’m safe, no worries
CUPCAKE: ha ha ha
DREW: I’ve been existing, now I think I can start to live again.
‘Drew?’ Lisa’s voice took me away from my phone, I was standing out front of the house. ‘Are you ready to leave?’