Survive for Me

by Karin Dahan

  “We need to go!” Junior brings me back to the present and suddenly everything rushes at me at once. I hear a static signal followed by a voice I recognize. I look around to see where it’s coming from, finding a walkie-talkie laying by my feet.

  “We need backup up here; under heavy fire! Can anyone hear us? We’re on the third floor…the enemy has gained access through the roof!” The voice belongs to Phoenix and I respond without hesitating. “I hear you … It’s me Eddie.” The line goes dead. “Phoenix, can you hear me?”

  I stare at the walkie, urging him to respond, but there’s nothing but silence.

  What am I doing? I have become what I despised in others. I have prioritized the big picture and ignored the individuals, the ones that have become not only my friends but my family. How can I abandon them when they were waiting for me upstairs, when they have given so much to protect me?

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  I need to make it to my friends. I need to make sure they are safe.

  I know we will figure out a way to get the recipe out after. It might not be today, but that’s a price I’m willing to pay.

  Right as I look up, Junior reloads his gun. “Time’s up,” he says. He’s about to turn the corner and fire down the hallway when a bullet hits him right in his chest. His body flies back from the impact. I scream as I watch him fall to the ground. I don’t have time to run up to him as an armed guard appears in the doorway seconds later.

  I duck behind the desk, putting the Bo down on the floor as I bring up an abandon gun. With both of my hands I take aim at the intruder as I stand. He’s bent over Junior, making sure he killed him. He doesn’t see me at first. I close my eyes as I fire the first shot. Then, I remember Junior’s words and open both eyes as I empty the chamber. The man falls on the floor, dead.

  I hold the gun in my shaky hands, too scared to put it down. I can’t seem to tear my eyes away from the dead solider, his lifeless body is my doing. I killed him. Nausea bubbles up in my as I hear gunshots from the corridor right outside the door.

  With no time to hesitate, I move. If I want to survive, I’ll have to

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  focus on what lies ahead. I have to get to my friends. I sprint over to the man on the ground and grab his weapon. It’s heavy. I need to use both hands to be able to carry it, but I know I will need it if I want to make it upstairs.

  The corridor ahead is pure chaos now; bodies on the floor, covered in blood. People are screaming; bullets are flying. I stay close to the walls, ducking behind furniture and bodies. When the fighting gets too dense, I crawl on the floor, most of which is smeared with blood. I force my mind to stay quiet, to not think about my surroundings. A bullet flies past my head, grazing my hair. I turn to see a soldier take aim at me again, a deadly smile covering his lips.

  I bring up my own weapon, firing blindly as I get to my feet and bolt to the stairs, aiming the gun behind me as I run like I have never run before.

  Right when my hand touches the railing a bullet grazes my leg. The wound stings and the pain catch me off guard, making me fall on my knees. This is it; I’m going to die now.

  I expect bullets to enter my back, but instead I feel nothing. I hear guns being fired behind me, but no bullets hit me. As I struggle to stand a strong arm helps me up. I don’t bother to look who my savior is.

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  Instead, I just follow along, clenching my teeth against the pain that explodes every time I use my right leg.

  When we make it to the second floor, the man that’s helping me puts a hand over my mouth as he pulls me toward the wall so fast I lose my breath. “Shh…. don’t move.”

  What if this man isn’t a savior? What if he works for Tenebris? I feel trapped by his hands and I’m about to kick him in the shin like Adira taught me when I hear voices coming from the corridor behind us. I even hear Edward’s voice in a distance. Pure panic pushes through me and I lift my leg to kick myself free when the person holding me spins me around, so that we are face-to-face.

  The first thing I notice is that the middle-aged man is wearing the same military jacket I saw on the Admiral before, just less decorated. It must mean we’re on the same team. I exhale in relief. I study him for a second. He’s handsome for his age, in a rugged type of way. His nose is crooked, from a healed broken bone; his chin sharp. He puts his finger over his mouth and pushes and points at the wall with his other hand. What’s he doing? Why is he wasting time? I can clearly hear the footsteps from the soldiers now. They’ll be here any minute.

  Suddenly, a door that I didn’t see before swings open and the

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  stranger pushes us inside with speed before the door shuts soundless behind us. The darkness encompasses us. I can hear the soldiers outside the thin wall. Their boots clicking on the metal stairs. I hope that they can’t hear my heartbeat as it feels like it’s beating as loudly as a drum right now.

  We stand still for a few minutes before the stranger turns on a flashlight, which he shines on the narrow stone staircase to our side. He gives me a small nudge to get me moving, but I plant my feet on the ground. “Who are you?” I whisper. I can see impatient flash in the stranger’s amber eyes before he gives me another nudge.

  “I will not go with a stranger. My friends are in danger. I have to get to them,” I whisper, making sure to keep my voice low enough so anyone in the staircase outside can’t hear me.

  “It’s too late. The house is swarming with enemies. I managed to get Ryker out. Where is Adira?”

  I swallow a lump in my throat and simply shake my head. The words are too painful to speak.

  I can see a sadness fill him before he pulls himself together. “Let’s go.”

  I do as he says. The promise of Ryker is too much to ignore.

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  Plus, it’s something about this stranger that is genuine and trustworthy.

  The stairs are narrow, and I run my hand against the cold wall to make sure I don’t trip and fall. A light shines from the bottom of the stairs. As we turn, a room opens up. A metal door that looks like it holds a bank vault lines the whole back wall. I give the stranger a questioning glare which he ignores, simply walking up to the camera on the wall next to the door. Loud clicks from the vault’s locks are heard and slowly the door swings open.

  Ryker runs out, embraces me before I can react. He holds me tight for a second and I cling to him like he’s an anchor in a stormy sea. “I thought I lost you…” he whispers before he let’s go. “Are you okay?”

  “We don’t have time for this. Get inside,” the stranger urges us.

  “What about the others?” I look at Ryker for answers.

  “Tenebris men took them. I tried to follow but Luke grabbed me before I could go after them.” Ryker gestures toward the stranger who is impatiently waiting at the door for us.

  “You’re bleeding.” He notices my leg and lifts me off my feet in a flash and carries me into the room behind the metal door.

  “You two will stay here and I will go back upstairs for Adira.”

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  “That’s a suicide mission. This place is crawling with Tenebris’ army. You can’t go up there,” Ryker says as he nudges his head to the screens that line the wall, all of them showing the different areas of the house, flipping between one room to the next. All I see is Tenebris’ army, like angry ants rushing towards an enemy. Ryker puts me down on a forest green sofa. I sink deep in the soft stuffing.

  Luke ignores the warning, instead he turns to head back. “You can’t go after her…” I protest, loud enough to make him stop. “…She’s dead,” my voice trembling with the last word.

  He stops mid-step, without turning towards me. “Are you sure?”

  “Yes … She died in my arms.”

  He looks up toward the ceiling, standing still for a minute before he turns and joins us in the room. Like a lightbulb has just turned on, I realize who Luke really is.

  Ryker closes the door, trapping us in the small bunker; metal wal
ls lining the sides along with provisions that could last a year. Everything has a sterile feel, and I shake, not knowing if it’s from the cold or the shock. I wrap my arms around myself in an attempt to get warm.

  Luke is already by the chair in front of the screens, flipping

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  between one after the other. “Who did it?” His voice is cold.

  I can’t say it was my uncle. The words don’t sit right anymore. He’s not my family after what he has done. “Edward,” I whisper.

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  Epilogue

  One week later…

  Rufus’ and Gilbert’s shack is different from the last time I was here; I doubt it will ever feel the same.

  The fireplace still gives a warm glow to the bedroom and we don’t have to be cold when we’re in here or go hungry for that matter. But the laughs amongst a group of friends on a mission is shining with its absence. Gone are Boston’s jokes and Phoenix’ laughs, Orland’s quiet nods and Gwennie’s sarcastic comments. And I miss them so much it hurts inside. I know Ryker feels it too, he’s been quiet since we got to Hope.

  Luke puts more wood into the fire and the flames dance in response, casting red flakes onto the stone floor. I’m glad Luke decided to stay with us after the fall of headquarters. Part of me thinks it’s because he wants to be close to me to get his revenge if Edward shows up. Another part of me feels it’s his way of honoring Adira, following the path she had chosen. Whatever his reason we will need him tomorrow. His fighting skills will be invaluable for us when we try to rescue Gwennie from the Scully’s, if she’s still alive.

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  And after we rescue Gwennie, we will get the rest of the crew, even if we die trying.

  I carefully flip the page in my mother’s journal, scared to damage the fragile paper. I remove the recipe that works as my placeholder from where I left off yesterday. Ever since that day in the bunker I have been reading her journal, savoring every moment like it’s my last meal, terrified of how empty I will feel when it’s over.

  “Did your mom write anything more about the mystery man she had been seeing?” Ryker interrupt me, right as I’m about to start reading.

  “No … nothing yet.” I look up at him and my heart skips a beat. I’m so happy he’s here with me, that I don’t have to do this on my own. “I still can’t wrap my head around that she had an affair … that she went behind my Dad’s back.” Pain mark my words. The discovery made me think twice about reading my mom’s personal memoirs, but the temptation to be near her again got too big to resist.

  I return to the book as Ryker sips his tea. As soon as I read her cursive writing I forget my surroundings and I’m close to her again, like it hasn’t been years since I last saw her face, heard her voice.

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  The day I have been waiting for has finally arrived. The years, month, days and hours of struggling to get pregnant is over and I now sit with my beautiful baby girl sleeping on my chest.

  It’s surreal in a way, even though I have had months to prepare for it. I never believed it would happen since Alec and I have tried year after year without even a sign of being close to conceiving.

  But this is real. She is here. My own precious child. I will love her forever and I can’t wait to see her grow up; learn to crawl, walk, talk and see what type of person she will become. No matter what, I know I will love her forever and I will protect her like a fierce mother lion protects her little cub. She will always be my true love.

  And I’m lucky that you fit perfectly in the name we picked for you, my little Eddie Perlite.

  I look up from the journal so fast that it accidentally falls to the floor.

  “What’s wrong?” Ryker looks at me from the chair across the table.

  I bend to pick up the book. “Nothing wrong; just trying to make sense out of something my mom wrote.” I find my placeholder and run

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  my finger over my mom’s writing.

  “What did she write?”

  “It’s about the day I was born and the name they picked out, Eddie Perlite … weird thing is I never knew I had that middle name and I’m pretty sure it’s not on my birth certificate.”

  “What, your photographic memory is failing you? Wouldn’t you be sure if you’ve seen it?”

  “Figure of speak,” I roll my eyes at Ryker who just grins at me. “I’m one hundred present certain it’s not on my birth certificate. There, is that better?”

  “Maybe your parents changed their mind?” Luke says as he pulls out a chair and joins us.

  “Maybe … But there is something about the name that sounds familiar,” I close my eyes as I try to remember where I have seen it before. It was in one of my Dad’s biology books. Suddenly, it’s like time stops and something clicks into place, something that changes everything on a radical level. It’s so incredible that I forget to breath. It’s the last piece of the puzzle.

  “Oh …” I manage and both Ryker and Luke stare at me, waiting for me to continue.

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  “What?” Ryker demands as he reaches his hand out to touch mine, “What’s wrong Eddie?”

  I finally manage to collect my thoughts and speak, and a single tear rolls down my check as I open my mouth. “Perlite is a volcanic glass, back in the day, it was used as a medium for plant growth. It’s basically like having sand in your soil, but better because it helps keep water capacity for the soil.” Both men look at me like I’m from some other universe. “Don’t you understand?!? This is the missing piece, the ingredient my parents left out. They hid it in my name!”

  “So … you’re saying that we have the recipe for sustainable soil?” Luke whispers, shock written all over his face.

  “That’s exactly what I’m saying.”

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  Copyright © Karin Dahan

  All Rights Reserved.

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