I’m in knots from my mind to my fucking feet.
He probably thinks I want to bash his face in and that’s fine. Sometimes that’s exactly what I want to do, to punch him square in the jaw.
Him and every other thing in reach.
He just keeps standing there, so I accept the drink in his hand.
“Thanks.” I take a small sip, trailing him as he moves back to the seat by the window.
“Where’s Lancaster?” I ask Mason, just realizing the tripods missing a leg.
“Should be on his way by now. He had an early training session.”
I nod. “Good, that’s good. He needs to keep his routine. Coach said there’s an offer out for a center they’re hoping to snatch up for next year.”
“I heard about that.” Chase sits up. “Some high school senior from Detroit. He’s supposed to be a beast.”
“He is. I watched his film.”
“Doesn’t matter.” Mason shrugs. “Brady’s stats this year were fucking wild and he’s only getting better. No one can read the line like him.”
“Yeah, he’s quick with adjustments. With you leading, you guys should go far next season.” The moment the words leave my mouth, I wish I could take them back, knowing I left this one wide open, and all we’ve have is time to pass, so they’ll keep the conversation going.
The second I look down, Mason speaks up.
“So you ready for the draft, my man?” Mason asks with a hint of excitement, the first I’ve heard from him in weeks. “That shit must feel surreal, being so fucking close after years of hard work?”
There it is, the exact topic I don’t want to discuss, especially with promising hopefuls I spent the last six months leading.
“That’s months away still.”
I don’t look up; Mason’s delayed response tells me he’s growing curious.
“Yeah, but you’ve got a lot of work leading to it. Shit, the Senior Bowl is just a few weeks away now. You probably fly out—”
“I’m not going.”
From her place on the ground, Cameron spins, facing me, but I don’t look up.
I run my fingers over Ari’s, brushing along the smooth lilac nail polish Cam painted on for her.
“You mean you’re not going too early to get familiar… just waiting until game day?”
“I told Coach Rogan to give my spot to someone else. I’m not going.” I turn Ari’s hand over, gliding my fingertips along her inner palm the way the nurse suggested. “Pulled out of Pro Day, too.”
“Oh my god,” Cameron mumbles, Mason’s voice nearly cutting her off.
“Wait a fucking minute,” he snaps.
I look up.
Mason glares, Cameron stares wide-eyed, and Chase frowns at the floor.
“You did what now?” Mason tips his head.
“Don’t.” I speak as sternly as I can manage. “I already got shit from every coach on payroll, and the rest of the staff, for that matter, including the trainers. It’s done. End of story.”
“Noah, man.” Mason furiously shakes his head. “Don’t do this. You worked your ass off for Avix and earned this shit. Not to mention all your years of high school and youth ball. Don’t let that go. You’ll regret it.”
“Regret?” I don’t mean to laugh, but that’s what happens. “Regret?” I deadpan.
“Noah, damn it—”
“You think I give a shit about my football career right now?” My voice raises an octave with every word, and I release Ari’s hand to protect her from the anger vibrating through me. “You think I’ve thought about it since I’ve been here? Since she has been here? Because I haven’t, not fucking once.”
“I get that this is fucked up and shit’s not normal right now, ok. Don’t fucking forget that is my sister lying there!” Mason shouts, pointing his finger at Ari. “But don’t think for one fucking second that this is what she would want you to do, because it’s not.” He’s standing right in front of me now. His glare is sharp, but his entire face falls, as does the pitch of his voice. “It’s not, man.” His eyes soften just a bit, and his voice lowers. “It’s not man. She wouldn’t want this for you.”
I just stare at him a minute, slowly nodding.
“I hear you. Honest, I do, and I know you’re right, but if there’s ever a time for me to be selfish, this is it. Because despite what she or anyone else might think is right for me right now, there is no way in this fucked-up world we’re currently living in that I could go out on that field and do a damn thing while my reason for breathing is lying here.” I shake my head slightly. “My regret would come from leaving her, not from staying. I could never regret being where I am right now. This is where I belong. This is where I’m staying. Nothing changes that and nothing is more important.”
Mason’s jaw flexes, his brows caving. He reaches out, clamping my shoulder, and gives me a little shake. “That right there, my man, is why I haven’t kicked your ass yet,” he says on a chuckle, making the rest of us join in.
The mood settles a moment, and everyone goes back to what they were doing a moment before, so I take a deep breath, swallowing a few mouthfuls of warm coffee.
“You realize it doesn’t matter if you pulled out of Pro Day, right?” Chase says, not bothering to take his eyes off the TV. “You already completed your college eligibility, and you were already confirmed as a prospect.” He looks my way. “The compliance department already signed off with a big green go. You’re in it.”
I hold his gaze until he looks away, only then dropping mine to my lap, forced to consider his words.
He’s not wrong. I know what I was signed up for, just like I know who’s interested.
I also know I’ll pass on every single offer that comes in.
Lifting Ari’s hand, I lean forward and bring it to my mouth, placing a small kiss along her knuckles. My eyes close and I press them a little firmer, cupping her hand with both of mine, speaking against her skin without a word whispered.
I imagine her thumb brushing along mine, just as it does.
My body goes stiff, my eyes flying open. I don’t dare move.
Don’t dare speak.
Her thumb twitches once more, and my head darts up. I jerk closer.
The others fly from their seats.
“What?! What’s wrong?!”
“What is it?!”
“Noah!” Mason snaps.
“She—” I shake my head, not taking my eyes off her face. “She moved. Her hand. She moved.”
My eyes fly from her face to her hand, back and forth, and her wrist jerks next.
Cameron’s hands clamp down on me, squeezing. “Oh my god! She moved! Mason, she moved!”
My head turns to look at the others, but my eyes wait until the last second to flick their way.
Mason’s eyes gloss over, and he glances from me to her. “Is she finally… think she’s…” He swallows, unable to say the words out loud.
I open my mouth, but nothing comes out, so I turn back, release her, and reach up to cup her face in my palms. Slowly, I stroke her cheeks.
“Open your eyes for me, baby,” I breathe as Mason grips my shoulder tight for support. “Juliet, open your eyes.”
Her lids begin to flutter, and the room fills with small gasps.
My heart rate spikes, my lungs squeezing, pleading she’ll fill them with hope once more. With purpose.
“This is it,” Cameron croaks, tears falling from her eyes. “She’s waking up. Ari, come on girly, wake the fuck up.”
“Baby… come on,” I whisper, trying my damnedest to keep my emotions under control but failing.
I watch, waiting for my world to start spinning again, as my girl ever so slowly opens her eyes.
A half laugh, half cry whooshes its way out of my chest and my forehead falls to her stomach. My body shakes with relief, and I pinch my eyes to try and calm myself, if only for a second.
She blinks a few times, her eyes widening as she slowly flicks them around the room.
They settle on Mason, and she lifts her left arm.
The sight alone has my smile spreading wide.
Movement from both sides.
Thank God.
Mase pushes closer, gripping her hand and giving it a squeeze.
“Hey brat.” His voice cracks. “You scared the shit out of us.”
That gets a small smile out of her, and all our sob-muffled chuckles follow.
She tries to sit up a bit, but winces, her hands shooting to her ribs.
“Try not to move too much,” I tell her softly.
Her eyes flash to mine and hold.
Just like that, my tension-riddled body goes lax. Every part of me settles, the left corner of my mouth lifting more and more until I couldn’t possibly smile wider. “Hi, Juliet.”
My voice is strained, and her chest rises, her mouth opening, but then her hand shoots up to touch her neck.
She tries to clear her throat, wincing once more.
There’s a shuffle in the room, but she doesn’t look away until someone is lowering a cup of water in front of her.
She looks, and her lips turn up at the edges.
“Hey, stranger.” Chase smiles back, passing the cup into her open hand.
The second she takes a small sip, Cameron is there to snatch it away. Water spills all over the floor as Cam throws her arms around Ari, careful not to squeeze her too hard. “I can’t believe you’re finally awake! You scared me, you bitch.” She laughs through her tears.
Ari’s low, raspy laugh runs through me, waking me up even more.
Every nerve in my body is firing to life, I can hardly sit still.
Ari takes a deep breath, dropping her back onto the pillow behind her.
Reaching up, I use the knuckles of my index finger to push her hair from her face, and she peeks through her lashes.
“How are you feeling, baby?” I ask, realizing how fucking stupid the question might be, but I need to know. I need to hear her speak. I need to know she’s okay.
She hesitates at first, a curious pull between her brows, but then she nods. “I’m okay. My body aches everywhere and my head is starting to pound, but I think I’m okay.”
I swallow, clenching my teeth so I don’t scare her by breaking down, but her voice…
I fucking missed it.
I missed her.
God, I love her.
I couldn’t bring myself to admit it before, but for a moment there, I wasn’t so sure I’d ever get the chance to tell her.
“Wait.” She tenses, looking around again. “Why am I here? What happened?”
My eyes meet Mason’s a moment, and then I lean forward, catching her attention. “You walked into the street.”
“You ran me over?” She clutches the blanket, and the monitor behind her starts beeping wildly.
“What? No.” I frantically shake my head, tipping my chin so she’s looking in my eyes. “No, baby. A car was coming, and I couldn’t get to you in time. They didn’t see you before it was too late.”
She visibly relaxes, but her breaths are short and labored, and she winces again.
“It’s okay, little sister,” Mason rasps, reaching out and placing his hand on her ankle. “You’re okay now.”
“What the fuckity fuck? My girl’s awake and no one called me?!” Brady tears through the little bubble we’ve formed around Ari. “That’s some bullshit, right there!” He grins, leaning down to place a giant kiss on her cheek, and I want to wipe it away, replace it with my own. “Glad you’re back, Ari Baby. Our boy here turns into more of a vagina with each passing day.” He looks her over, humor his way of working through his worries. “I told him you just needed your beauty sleep, ain’t that right?” he teases, knocking his fist into my shoulder.
“Funny, Lancaster.” I grin, sitting back in my chair.
Ari’s brows draw together, and she laughs. “Missed you, too, Brady.”
“What’s all the noise, gentlemen? I told you hoodlums no more watching football in this room if you guys can’t… oh! Well, hi honey!” Nurse Becky beams, spotting Ari awake in bed. “Thank goodness you’re up. These men are worse than toddlers. So needy.” She teases with a wink.
“Don’t let her fool you, girl, she loves us.” Brady nods.
Nurse Becky lets out a playful sigh. “Yes, I do.”
She smiles and walks over to Ari, gently patting her leg. “I’m Becky. I’ve had the pleasure of being your daytime nurse since you got here, and I’ve got to say, it’s damn good to see your eyes, sweetheart. I see those golden flecks that boy of yours was whispering about.”
I open my mouth, but close it, chuckling from being caught.
Mason nudges me with his knee, smirking to himself.
“I know you just woke, but I can bet you’re exhausted and have lots of questions. Let me run and grab Dr. Brian.”
“Thank you,” she responds, the soft hum of her tone coming back more and more with each word spoken.
I squeeze her hand, and she looks toward the contact, her eyes flying to mine as if she only realized now I’m holding on to her.
I allow her the moment she wordlessly asks for, saying nothing as she takes me in from the light scruff building along my jaw, from refusing to spend an extra ten minutes shaving when I knew she was sitting in this bed without me, to the wrinkle of my clothes, pulled from a messy duffel bag I had my buddy drop off.
Slowly, her eyes make their way back to mine and hold.
“Hi, beautiful.” I tip my head. “I’ve missed those chocolate eyes.”
I smile wider when a hint of pink colors her cheeks, but then she looks away. Slowly, she eases her hand out of mine and begins adjusting her blanket.
Something stirs in my gut, and I lick my lips, slipping to the edge of my chair.
“Well, hello, there.” Dr. Brian rushes in with a smile, quickly washing his hands in the sink across the room.
As he comes forward, the group steps back to allow him some space. I don’t move.
“I’m Dr. Brian.” He tips his chin. “And you are?”
She frowns. “Um, Arianna Johnson.”
“Yes, you are.” He nods. “Passed the test.”
A worried chuckle leaves her.
“Like Nurse Becky, here, I’ve been tending to you since your arrival. I’m going to ask you a few questions, and then we’ll talk about your injuries. Does that sound, all right?”
“Yes sir,” she mumbles nervously, wringing her hands in her lap.
“Okay, good. I assume it’s okay to speak now?” He lifts his hands, as if referring to us, and she nods. “Good. Let’s start with an easy one. On a scale from one to ten, ten being the highest, how would you rate your pain?”
“About an eight.”
“Big baby.” Mason speaks only to ease her, clearing his throat as emotions take over.
It works. Her mouth pulls, but she keeps her attention on the doctor.
“Okay.” He nods. “Where are you hurting the most?”
“My head is throbbing more so than anything else.” Her palm flattens just below her breast. “And my chest. It’s hard to breathe.”
The room grows stiff with worry as we listen, and I draw my lips in.
“That’s normal, considering.” He clasps his hands together, letting them hang in front of him. “Before I break down your injuries, let me ask. Arianna, are you aware of what happened? How you ended up here?”
Her face contorts a bit and she looks to Mason with pleading eyes. He gives her a small nod for encouragement, and she looks back at Dr. Brian.
She shakes her head. “I was hit by a car?”
“Yes, that’s right.” The man nods. “You took quite a hit. Your legs and arms went mostly unscathed, but your right shoulder had to be popped back into place. Your right lower rib is fractured, but it is very minor and nothing to be concerned about, but your left is where it gets tricky. See, two of your upper right ribs are broken.” He refers to his own body, so she can visualize
, as he explains, “When that happened, you suffered a traumatic aortic injury. Your aorta, the main artery in your body, was ruptured, causing extensive bleeding. Thankfully, your body did its job, and the surrounding tissues contained as long as we needed it to. Had your lung been punctured, we might not be here to have this conversation, but we won’t go down that road.”
Ari nods, letting him know she’s following, and my leg starts bouncing uncontrollably as I hear the doctor’s explanation of what happened to my girl for the first time.
“You also suffered a basilar skull fracture on the left side of your skull, just around your left eye. Initially we were worried about cerebrospinal fluid leakage, but after running some tests, we were able to rule that out. Because of that, though, you were placed in a medically induced coma for the first few days for monitoring, after that, we stopped the medication and waited for you to wake on your own and now, here we are.”
“Wait…” She pushes up higher, her eyes scanning along her body. “How long have I been here?”
“Eleven days.”
Her eyes bulge, and he lifts his hands.
“I know it’s a little scary and confusing, but you’re here, your family has been here the entire time, and you’re going to be just fine.”
Her shoulders draw up, but she nods.
“Thankfully all the hard stuff is done. Conservative treatment is all you need. We’ll keep you as comfortable as we can with pain management, and we can also give you something for the nausea you’ll likely still experience. Obviously, we will be keeping you for a little while longer to monitor you, but it shouldn’t be more than a day or two.”
“Okay.” Ari’s voice is small and scared, and I just want to reach for her. “That doesn’t sound too bad.”
“Yes, you were extremely lucky.” Dr. Brian clears his throat, his expression goes somber and Nurse Becky looks down, busying herself with Ari’s file.
Something’s off. I can feel it.
“Ms. Johnson, after the accident, your body went into hypovolemic shock due to the amount of blood you lost.”
Say You Swear Page 35