Surviving

by Henry Green

  Bell rang. Those behind surged forward again to platform edge and a woman was pushed over. She fell onto the rails. Great cry went up. People on next platform waved and their mouths opened then shut but none of their shouting could be heard. Coil of men and women struggled round where she had fallen off. She was pulled up again then. Porters ran along platform edge and pushed the crowds back. They heard something had happened and out of refreshment room hurried men wiping mouths with backs of hands and a few women. But word went round it was nine minutes yet before their train and Inspector said this again to those round refreshment room. So they went back. Crowd spread out again over platform. They collected in groups.

  Train drew in to the next platform and crowd there fought and climbed into it and soon it went off.

  Meantime Station Master in black frock coat and top hat had come out through door with STATION MASTER painted on it and was walking about. He was very fat. Each group he passed twisted their heads round to watch him going, so it was like slow wind over grass – the light faces turning. The girls giggled. Conn and Else giggled till they gasped for just as he was by them Jim had winked and he must have seen as he had gone red and puffed cheeks out. But Mrs Pendleton’s son was talking to policeman and saying he had his own money, and as mother had been at head of the line he could go there now to buy ticket for himself but policeman said not and that he would have to go to the beginning and start again. He asked the crowd but had no answer from them. The two children, holding hands, watched pa and ma on seat doing nothing, looking at boots.

  In refreshment room attendants in black and white, fat women, gave out tea and little glasses to the crowd there. Men had flasks and bottles. They poured spirits out of these into the little glasses. Mr Healy took out flask and said to Mrs Eames if she would have a drop. She said she didn’t mind if she did. Her woman friend had cup of tea. Tea urn was rubbed up and shining. Under bell-shaped glass covers on the counter were three-sided pile of sandwiches, one pork pie, stack of sausage rolls, three eggs, apples, small cakes – stack of sausage rolls, small cakes, three-sided pile of sandwiches, six eggs, three packets of biscuits in tissue paper bags, one pork pie, three apples – small cakes, three-sided pile of sandwiches, one sausage roll, one empty stand and bell-shaped glass cover, six apples, cylinder of three pork pies standing on end on each other. Up wall on shelves many bottles with many colours. Everywhere red and blue packets of chocolate, rectangles. Mrs Eames, in hat with three great feathers, leant over marble counter top holding little glass in one hand. Now it had whisky in it. Little finger, crooked, made three sides of square with hand. She said a marriage was in her street that day, in No. 27, and there would be fun there that night, there would said she. She chuckled. But she said she did not think it neighbourly in those two women. She had seen them on platform now, those two sisters Weeks that lived next door in No. 25, it wasn’t right in them not to go to it. Neighbours were neighbours and they had been invited, Mrs Clark had told her. They didn’t behave Christian. They made a nice profit out of that shop those two, so much that they were selling it now, Mrs Apps had told her. Bleeding money out of you, then not going to the wedding.

  Outside on platform two coons, faces black painted, red lips and white eyeballs, walked up and down with banjuleles under arm and grey straw hats on head. Everyone in each big group again twisted head round to watch them going so it was like slow wind over grass – the light faces turning. Many children followed behind in path made for them by them through the crowd and they pulled long noses and shouted behind and man or woman here and there cried encouragement to the children. Soon everyone on platform was laughing at the two coons, then they took no more notice of these two, and children went back to fathers and mothers.

  Publican’s daughter, Mary Jones, was with Henry Simmons. They stood where platform was least crowded. She said nasty smelly people, why did we come? He was silent. She was silent. Then she said nasty smelly dirty people, why did father make me come? He was silent. She was silent. He fiddled with button of his coat. She said then oh Henry don’t fiddle with that button, why did I come? They were silent. She said, look at the Weekses, how surprising to see them here.

  Poorly dressed man went to Station Master in top hat who was walking up and took off his brown cap and bowed before him and said what made all near by laugh at Station Master. This one turned red and walked on up. But the children did not mock at him.

  Train drew in to the platform next but one and crowd there fought and climbed into it and soon it went off. Next platform was filling up again. Two met there on it shouted and waved to man in front of Mary Jones and he shouted and waved to them. Mary Jones took Henry Simmons away then to end of the platform.

  The Misses Weekses stood close by Ticket Inspector who looked at tickets and made holes in them as in lines people still came past Booking Office onto platform. They were looking at Mr and Mrs Pendleton who looked at boots. One Weeks said to other it was a hard thing on them that they had lost purse and to think of it coming all this way and then to be losing it, and this a Bank Holiday. The other said she couldn’t think where Mrs Pendleton had put it who was sparing enough with it when she was in the shop. First one went over to Ticket Inspector who was looking at tickets and making holes in them all the time and said she had lost her purse that poor woman behind barrier there and her name was Mrs Pendleton. Ticket Inspector said he was busy. Then the other saw Mrs Healy with small daughter and both went over to them and first one said to Mrs Healy how Mrs Pendleton had lost purse and now she could not go on trip to country and how hard it was on husband for wife to be so careless, and other Weeks said she had always known her careless. Mrs Healy said it was not like her to do something like that and what she always said was that if you couldn’t keep your purse what could you keep but she did not say much more and after two minutes the Weekses moved back again to barrier and watched Mrs Pendleton again. Mrs Healy said to Mrs Smith she wondered Weekses weren’t after giving Pendletons something to buy tickets with what with all the money they had from Street 37. Mrs Smith said that was so.

  Sun came through glass roof. Then a cry. Shouting. Then murmur stopped which had been from the crowd all over station like lathe working under roof and by milk cans on the trolley man cried ‘Thief’ and ‘Thief’. On each side turned they all of them towards trolley and closed in towards it, straining circling white faces. At back they stood on benches, some jumped, all closed in round the trolley, pressing. Here and there cried they asking what it was and policeman who had been by Pendletons and had come past the barriers made way for himself through them to centre. Woman right in centre by trolley talked very high and fast. Station Master also was making way for himself through them and some porters in a bunch but crowd pressed thick, very silent. In centre by trolley man waved his arms and began to shout. Everyone began to laugh at him and when policeman reached him some went away and stood round in circles at a distance and looked round and talked of it. Several had climbed onto trolley in centre but policeman moved them off. The Station Master was there now and was talking and was holding top hat in hand and was wiping red face. Someone shouted ‘I’m H-O-T,’ and all laughed again. Station Master turned red. And the group which had come out of refreshment room when they heard shouting hurried back in to have a last one. They could not tell Mrs Eames what it was about. So she said Weekses had been getting too gay with some man probably. They all laughed.

  One by one from behind door with THIRD CLASS WAITING ROOM painted on it a few men and women, wives and husbands – these were real travellers, they were so dirty – these came out huddled, dusty with travelling. But they went back yawning for policeman was leading man away followed by woman who had talked high and fast and Station Master who led two children and an Inspector and two porters with woman’s husband, worried-looking man. The crowd made way for them and broke slowly up into thick groups again.

  Weekses had been parted by first rush in towards trolley but with crowd breaking up they met and o
ne said to other it was terrible, pickpockets even on a holiday and you didn’t know where you were with them and other said she always held purse in hand and, let them try to take it from her, they could not, and it was what Mrs Pendleton had been done to most likely. Then Conn and Else Finch came up and Jim Cripps and Conn said to first one it made her nervous it did people rushing so so you might get knocked down and walked on and Else said she didn’t like to have money now on her and Jim whistled, hands in pockets. Then Conn said to first one she wondered they didn’t get nervous in the shop with all the murderers there were about now and Else said to Conn to look at Mr Healy there who had had a drop too much and Conn asked Else what it had to do with her and couldn’t Mr Healy do what he pleased on a Bank Holiday. Weekses went away and one said to other it was disgusting, disgusting and in public too and other said she knew now about Conn Finch and she’d never cared much about Finch twins before and now she knew. First one said they hadn’t spent a penny in the shop for twelvemonth now, it wasn’t neighbourly, and other said they was immoral.

  On furthest platform next to hotel walls train drew in and crowd there fought and climbed into it. People went by behind hotel windows above and looked out down on it here and there. Soon the train went off, everyone cheering in it.

  Mr Healy came from refreshment room with no collar on now and with shirt open across chest. He asked Inspector when train would be in. Inspector said any time now and would be another after to take those left behind. Mr Healy wiped neck by open shirt with handkerchief. He said to Inspector had he seen the wife and daughter? Inspector smiled and said what did they look like? Then Mr Healy said he’d never have done it if the wife hadn’t been so keen for he remembered travelling between Swansea and Malvern, where the wife’s people were living then, on Bank Holiday nine years ago it must be now and it was a day hotter than this. Inspector said ‘go on.’ Mr Healy said yes it was, it was something fierce, but still you couldn’t really say it was bad as now. And what had that chap done, he said, what had been taken away. He’d never seen nothing like it before in railway stations he said.

  Boy in dark uniform and cap pushed refreshment barrow past Weekses and they stopped him. One fingered banana and said to other she could not understand how money could be spent on things like those picture Society papers next to buns there. She asked boy how much bun was. Boy said tuppence. Other said it was a shame. Then first one said she supposed bananas would be three ha’pence. Boy said not, they were tuppence. She said why you could get better for a penny each in Cornwall Road. Boy said but this was Station Road. Other said it was a shame and shameful the way they spoke to you.

  The two Pendleton small children held hands and watched refreshment barrow and then looked back at pa and ma who sat on bench and looked at boots. Mr Pendleton put hand into coat pocket and drew out pipe which he put into mouth and with other hand took out something and looked at it and looked at it again and said here it was and Mrs said what and then when she saw it why it was the purse. So she said all the time she’d known he’d had it and he said he couldn’t say how it came to be in pocket and she told him to go and buy tickets now and to be quick as was not much time now and she told children to stay by ma. Mr Pendleton went but policeman who had been there had gone now with the man in the crowd so he began to say to those at top of line to let him in before them as he had been first so should be first again – he had waited hours he said, whole hours, but he did not get much answering out of them. But those in front by platform edge began all of them to look up rail lines, and those behind pressed forward. They met in thick line, dark but lighted by faces all looking one way. It was the train. Mrs Pendleton shouted to Mr to hurry as train was coming in now and Inspector walked down and was saying another train would be in after this one to take those left behind. You could not hear him for noise. People waiting to buy tickets were quite few now but they would not let Mr Pendleton go before them so he went to the end and moved up with them. Fat woman sweating under green faded parasol came in behind him. Ticket Inspector looked at tickets and punched holes in them quicker and quicker and shouted as everyone was beginning to shout. Train slowly came in making great puffing noise and those at platform edge drew back as it came by. Line of those waiting to buy tickets heaved and those on platform heaved forward again when train stopped and they shouted and rushed up into the carriages. Weekses ran up and down behind, one saying to other, here Mary, and, no Agatha this way. Soon train was full and every window filled with faces lozenge shaped one on top of the other which all looked and shouted at those left on platform. Mr Pendleton was buying ticket now and Mrs cried to him holding child by each hand. Inspector walked up and was saying another train would be in after this one to take those left behind. One Weeks said to other it was a shame the way they fought to get into trains, those others, and then train drew out – porters ran down it shouting to stand clear and everyone in carriage windows cheered and it went quicker and was gone.

  Station Master turned and slowly went back to door with STATION MASTER painted on it and shut it behind him. Porters went across the rails to next platform. Train drew in there and crowd fought and climbed into it. Soon that train went off, everyone cheering in it. Mary Jones said to Henry Simmons nasty smelly dirty people she was glad they hadn’t got places on the first train and she would have gone straight home now if it wasn’t that they had bought tickets. One Weeks ran up to Inspector and asked what they were to do now with their train gone and he said another would be in directly to take those left behind. These stood about in groups and circles. Mrs Eames came out of Refreshment Room and waved arms and went back again. Mrs Pendleton blamed Mr at platform edge and Weekses went up to them and one said to her well she saw they had found purse after all and Mrs Pendleton said yes, they had, and would say no more. So Weekses moved further down and other said to first one it was not a thing to get angry about when you had found it but a thing to be thankful of. Not so many people were in station now. And all looked one way along rail lines curving and upright signals and were blue sheds in sun with roofs shining and nothing to be seen but one shunting engine and balls of smoke going from funnel into other blue of sky.

  FORTIES

  Green said of the fire fighting: ‘It was four hours on and four hours off, even when there weren’t raids. When there were raids of course we were out the whole time. ’ On rest days – every third day – he continued to manage Pontifex which was being run by a skeleton staff. With Pack My Bag published in 1940, and the first chapters of Caught completed, Green wrote several short stories, and submitted the first, A Rescue, to John Lehmann in 1941. Caught was published in 1943, followed by Loving in 1945; Back in 1946; and Concluding in 1948. In 1949 Loving was published in America, where it featured briefly on the bestseller lists.

  A RESCUE

  (Published in Volume 4 Penguin New Writing, March 1941)

  One evening in the third week of the blitz on London, that is after fighting fires every night and all night, my crew was ordered to relieve another pumping out the basement shelter of a store which had been burned down the week before. We were glad. We could look forward to a night spent in one of the deepest shelters, very little work, a good supper and better breakfast provided by the management of the store and, above all, no fire fighting. When we got our orders at evening roll call we were greeted with cries of ‘blue eyed’ and ‘you lucky bastards’.

  The sirens had already gone, the night was soft, there was a moon and, across the way, over a street made unreal by thin mist, three searchlights joined at one point to create a slowly-moving giant tripod with nothing, nothing in their beams. The guns were busy and the shell-bursts, like fireworks a mile or more away, did not follow the slowly swinging apex those searchlights threw up of more than moonlight, its essence, that was projected in three paths to the shifting point the gunners did not follow with pink stabs. The noise was accidental in that it seemed to bear no relation either to gun flashes, vast quick semicircles silhouetting roofs, or
to the bursts, or, more rarely to those long two-second rosy glows made by a high explosive bomb. Only the steady drone, an interrupted drone, overhead made all of it threatening, gave it that meaning which caused every man in this station to laugh and talk louder than he need, as he put on his gear in readiness for the fire call that might now be only a question of minutes.

  I was in charge of the pump and tender. I was anxious that we should get away for there might soon be enough fires started to lead those in authority to abandon for the time being the basement in which we were to work. If we could get out of sight we might be forgotten. There had been no gas at our station for several days. There were no electric cookers in our kitchen such as they used where we were going. Two hot meals and a night in dry clothes looked too good to be true.

  Then I could not find the crew. The station was a doorless garage so that at night it was badly lighted. I went here and there shouting and in the end came round to the back. With the men yelling to each other in the half dark as they put on their gear, and the gunfire, the crew had not heard me from where they were already seated in the pitch-dark tender, as keen as I to get away.

  I had to go to the watchroom to report out. They booked it and phoned a certain control to say we were going. When this control accepted our departure I knew that nothing short of a bomb could stop us. But things were getting rather hot outside. So much so that when I got back to the tender a voice called out from within, ‘Let’s get on out, Henry.’ And then a fool ran up just as we were moving. He shouted, ‘Have you got a tool kit?’ Because it was part of my job to know this I shouted back, ‘How the bloody hell should I have any idea?’ As we drove away it was to these words of his, drifting behind us between two crashes, ‘I only asked a civil question.’