Ruin

by Lila Rose

  Honestly, I’d had enough of hanging around fake people. It was all rich people talking crap about one another. I hadn’t even seen Ryo at his own party. Hoping Mimi felt the same, I made my way over to her. I weaved through the crowd even though I wanted to shove people out of the way, simply because that was the type of mood I was in. Not only was I irritated that I didn’t know what the hell was going on inside me, but I was also pissed that Wolf drew out any type of reaction.

  Mimi saw me coming and smiled. It was radiant. She was enjoying herself. I couldn’t drag her away all because I wasn’t. I forced a grin and curled an arm around her shoulders as I caught sight of an open door, a breeze blowing the curtain inwards.

  “Are you all right?” Mimi asked.

  I could feel eyes on us, but I didn’t give a fuck what they thought of me, and Mimi wasn’t fazed I had an arm around her. “I’m all good, babe. Just wanted to let you know I’m gonna get some air over there.”

  “Okay, I’ll be done here soon.”

  I shook my head and tugged her closer. “Nah, honey, take your time. I’m good.”

  She rolled her eyes. “Go get your air, Ruin.”

  I winked and walked off, but I heard behind me, “Is he yours?”

  Mimi laughed. “No, we’re friends. He’s here from home to keep me company.”

  “I could have a baby or two with him,” someone said, and they all laughed.

  Shaking my head, I smiled despite the sour mood. At the door, I went to move the curtain out of the way to get out, but I heard voices first and froze.

  “Are you sure you want to do this?” Wolf asked.

  Do what?

  “I have always wanted you in my mouth,” Elise replied huskily.

  Wanted you in my mouth?

  What the fuck?

  What. The. Fuck?

  I grabbed the curtain and shifted it aside to peek out. Wolf leaned against the railing facing my way. His gaze focused on the woman on her knees in front of him.

  His hand reached out to caress her face. “Then undo my pants if you’re that keen,” he taunted.

  My damn gut twisted violently when I saw her hands come up.

  “I would like to please you in any way I can,” Elise purred.

  “I’m glad to hear you say that, Elise. Release me from my pants.”

  I clenched my hands on the curtain and screwed up my nose, my upper lip rising.

  Did I stop this or ignore it?

  Why did I want to stop this?

  Why did seeing it make me sick to the gut?

  Her hand slipped into his pants, but her head was in the way to see anything. Not that I wanted to, but… I did want to stop this.

  Didn’t I?

  No… I didn’t care what Wolf was doing.

  “Good girl. Open your sweet mouth for me.” Wolf’s words got to me. Anger sparked and burned in my chest. Before my brain caught up with my body, I pushed the curtain aside and stepped out.

  “Get up,” I snarled.

  Elise let out a squeal when she faced me. I got an eyeful of Wolf’s cock out of his pants and was surprised he… why wasn’t he hard?

  “What’s going on?” Elise asked, standing.

  Wolf sighed and leaned his elbows back on the railing, shaking his head. What he didn’t do was put away his dick.

  Moving closer, I waved a hand at him but kept my gaze up. “You gonna put that away?” I asked, a little harsh.

  Wolf cocked his head to the side and smirked. “No.”

  Glaring, I turned on Elise. “Get the fuck outta here.”

  “What is this?” she asked, looking between Wolf and me.

  “Nothin’,” I told her.

  Wolf straightened and studied his nails.

  “I think I’ll leave,” Elise said and started for the door.

  “Actually,” Wolf called. Elise paused. Why hadn’t he put his dick away? Elise turned back to him. Her gaze dropped to his dick; so did mine. Why was it hard now? I flicked my gaze up and his eyes, full of humour, were on me. Did I do that? Why?

  I took a step back. I didn’t care if I’d done that.

  “What?” Elise asked.

  Wolf stared at her coldly. “Before you leave. Ryo,” he called. Ryo appeared from a darkened corner on the balcony with a phone in his hand.

  “What’s this?” Elise demanded.

  “Proof you were ready to have my dick in your mouth.”

  “You can’t—”

  “I can. I did. And before you run back to that boyfriend of yours, think clearly on what you will say to him, Elise.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Do you think your little trip to my office didn’t go unnoticed?”

  How can he have a conversation with his dick out?

  Elise’s eyes flared. “I-I—”

  “Don’t even try to deny it. Whatever information you found out will stay in your mind or I will send this video to him. Do you think he’ll want to keep you when you were ready to suck off his enemy?”

  “He won’t care. He wanted me to do anything.”

  “Are you certain he won’t care?”

  Elise’s lips snapped closed, and she scowled at Wolf. Yeah, her boyfriend would care.

  “Ryo, escort Elise out and search her before we release her.”

  “Yes, Wolf.” Ryo strode over and grabbed Elise by the arm. She said no more while Ryo dragged her through the doorway. I watched them go, facing away from Wolf and his dick.

  Crap. I should have followed.

  “Can I ask, Ruin, why you came out to stop what was happening?”

  Fuck.

  Sighing, I scrubbed a hand over my face and twisted to see he still stood near the railing with his goddamn dick out. It was also still hard. Shaking my head, I walked over and leaned my elbows on the railing, snarling, “Put it away.”

  “No.”

  “Why?” I barked. “And why the fuck weren’t you hard for her, but as soon as I— Actually, don’t answer that.” I dropped my head, eyes to the ground below where people entered or left the house.

  I jumped, and my skin tingled when a hand landed on my lower back. Warm breath brushed over the side of my face when Wolf said, “She didn’t interest me like you do.”

  I clenched my teeth together. “I said don’t tell me.”

  Laughter sounded from the doorway. I straightened and faced the door by stepping in front of Wolf. No one would fucking see him with his dick out.

  A group of people stepped onto the balcony.

  “Put it away,” I clipped.

  His soft laughter swept over me. “It’s already away.” His hands dropped to my waist, and I froze. One hand disappeared, and he glided a finger down the back of my neck as his body pressed into my back. My heart knocked around in my chest like it was on speed. My dick throbbed. I wanted to rip it off for doing so, as it didn’t match with my brain when I knew I was into women. Only women. His lips caressed my neck lightly. “But it’s good to see you get jealous.” He stepped around me and greeted the people with a smile and cheerful voice.

  My feet were stuck to the floor, watching him talk with his friends as if he hadn’t just had his dick out, a woman nearly suck on it, and then messed with my head.

  Maybe that was normal for him.

  It wasn’t for me.

  None of this was.

  What was wrong with me?

  Why Wolf?

  Fucking why?

  He glanced back. His eyes held heat, his smile wicked.

  I had to get the fuck out of there.

  He grazed his top teeth over his bottom lip, watching me over the shoulder of another man.

  Jesus Christ.

  Fuck me.

  All right… okay…. I could admit he was good-looking in his suit and white shirt, his fancy shoes, and long dyed hair, which flowed free around his shoulders. His skin needed… needed my hands on it.

  Fuck.

  Had I just thought that? Yeah, I did. I fucking thought of hav
ing my darker tone on his. I used to be envious of my sister’s skin colouring, since it resembled Mum’s, and mine was like our father’s. Darker. Only now, I liked mine more because it was a distinctive contrast to Wolf’s colour.

  I wanted to see them together.

  I fucking did, and that thought was a holy-motherfucking-shit moment.

  He was a guy.

  He had a damn dick.

  There were no tits to motorboat, just a flat chest.

  And I stood there on my own, checking him out, my cock throbbing in my black jeans. There was no denying my dick liked what he saw. But how? He was a dude. Was my dick sick?

  Broken?

  Confused?

  My head—on my shoulders—was about to blow. I had to get out of there.

  Then why wasn’t I moving?

  Why couldn’t I look away from the man who was smiling over the guy’s shoulder at me? Why was my heart beating faster than it ever had? Even my palms were sweating.

  What did I look like to Wolf? A guy freaking out on the inside but probably looking cool as a cucumber on the outside? Actually, my eyes felt wide. My lips were parted from my heavy breaths, which had my chest rising and falling rapidly. On the outside, I could have looked like a dickhead on the verge of running for the door, if my feet would move for me.

  I wasn’t ready for the realisation to dawn on me.

  I liked playing dumb or ignoring the facts. Because the facts showed me I was into Wolf.

  A guy.

  How could I switch just like that?

  It was his fault.

  His damn looks were the problem.

  His teasing was the issue.

  His attention on me was the trouble that caused my dick to react in the first place.

  Glaring over at him, I remained frozen, which caused him to laugh. The man he spoke to went to turn to look at what had him amused, but Wolf brought his attention back by taking his arm.

  The fucking prick touched a guy in front of me.

  “Ruin?”

  I swung my gaze down to Mimi. When had she got out there? She glanced from me to her brother and back again.

  “Hey, you done?” I asked.

  “Sure. Everything okay?”

  “Yep.” I nodded and wouldn’t allow my gaze to shoot back to Wolf like it wanted to. Instead, I curled an arm around her shoulders and guided her towards the door.

  Mimi’s hand lifted and gripped my waist. “You sure everything’s okay?”

  “Course.” I smiled down at her.

  “Are you going?”

  I stilled at the words, knowing who they’d come from. Mimi looked up at me and then to her brother, since I wouldn’t. “Yes. It’s been great catching up with people, but I’m all done socialising.”

  “I understand. I wish I could leave also.” Wolf reached out to take Mimi’s hand, and he pulled her into a hug. I glanced up, and our gazes locked. Wolf smiled, my gut twisted, and I glared in return. His smile increased, and he winked. I looked away.

  When Mimi wound her arm around my waist again, I took it as a sign to continue to the door.

  “Goodnight, Ruin” was called from behind me.

  “Yeah, night,” I replied shortly.

  Botan and Mimi’s guard stayed back as we walked down the hall, and Mimi filled me in on some of her friends. At her door, she unlocked it and pushed it open but didn’t enter.

  “You know,” she started, and I pulled my eyes from glancing down the hall to her, “it’s okay.”

  I dipped my brows, confused. “What is?”

  “If you like my brother.”

  I scoffed, snorted, and forced an awkward laugh. “You’ve had too much to drink,” I told her, shaking my head. Fear upped my pulse. Had she sensed something between us? How? I…. Wasn’t Wolf like that with everyone?

  Mimi gave me a soft smile. Her hand rested on my arm as I crossed them over my chest. “Ruin, I know we’re friends, and no offense, but I wouldn’t want to date you because you’re like a brother now. I won’t be hurt if anything happened between you and Taro.”

  Even though my gut clenched and my heart raced, I rolled my eyes. Shit, I hadn’t even thought that—jumping from one sibling to another—and I wouldn’t need to because nothing was going on with me and Taro—Wolf. Fucking Wolf. “Are you forgetting I’m into women?” Christ, those words tasted disgusting. Why?

  Ignore.

  Ignore.

  Ignore.

  Mimi sighed. “People can change.”

  “Not this one.”

  “Your parents would support you,” she tried.

  “They don’t need to. There’s nothing to support.”

  Mimi groaned as if in pain. “Ruin. I’m not blind. I see some… chemistry between you and Taro.” So what if she had? But I still didn’t get how. I hadn’t done anything… had I?

  I shook my head. “You must be going blind.”

  Her lips thinned. “You’re annoying me now.”

  I shrugged and smirked. “Okay.”

  “I want to kick you.”

  Chuckling, I said, “No need to get violent.”

  Her other hand also gripped my arm as she stepped closer. “It would be scary knowing you have this new feeling inside you—”

  “Mimi,” I warned. What was she, psychic?

  “But life is about challenges and acceptance. Live your life, Ruin, in any way you want it. I took a chance and ran when I had to, and it was the best choice I made because it brought me to a new family. A daunting one to begin with, but one that holds so much love no matter who you are. Taro’s a good guy. Take your chance… when you’re ready.”

  Glaring, I looked away from her. “I don’t know why you’re telling me all this shit for.”

  Mimi hummed under her breath. “You stubborn, pain-in-the-arse dick.”

  I was. I really was.

  Snorting, I asked, “You comin’ on to me, babe?”

  It was her turn to glare as she shook her head and stepped back. “I wish my brother luck with you.”

  I was the one who needed luck when it came to her brother, but I didn’t say that. Instead, I said, “Night, sweetheart.”

  “Night, pest,” she said, smiling as she closed the door.

  I didn’t like that Mimi could read something between Wolf and me. Not when I… wasn’t ready to accept anything, because the fucking thought of change scared me. I liked my life as it was. I liked who I was, and now, it was as if I didn’t know myself.

  Chapter Eight

  Wolf

  The other night, Ruin’s dismissal at Ryo’s birthday when we’d stood with Elise at the bar annoyed me. He always ran whenever I got close. He hadn’t even complimented my change in hair colour.

  There was something about Ruin that appealed to me. It was beside the fact he was stunningly gorgeous. I had never been attracted to the tattooed hooligan type, who didn’t like the letter G on the end of words or wouldn’t wear a suit if his life depended on it.

  As soon as I had seen him back in Ballarat standing off to the side from his biker brothers, listening, waiting, it had been hard to concentrate on the matter, and all because he had taken my breath away. His beauty was like no other.

  I’d wanted to know him, taste him, and use his name by ruining him in the best way.

  Luck had been on my side when the club’s president ordered Ruin to watch over Mimi. I had been offended at first—that Talon would think I would do anything to my sister. I was nothing like my father. But I caved quickly when I knew I wanted more time gazing at the wonder before me.

  I sounded like a perverted stalker, but it was what Ruin did to me. I couldn’t stop myself from teasing him, hoping to get a rise, and when I did, his eyes came to life.

  I was sure I saw something in them each time, as if he enjoyed my attention. Except for that unfortunate slip-up in the kitchen when I couldn’t resist any longer and had to have my hands and lips on him.

  His look of disgust still angered me, but the c
onfusion I also saw puzzled me.

  I wanted to piece the puzzle together and see what the picture revealed when our time together finished.

  He would leave to go home, and I would be stuck here in charge of the family.

  I couldn’t help but think of that night once more. The way he had stormed onto the balcony to stop Elise, much like a scorned lover. When I saw him like that, I had hardened over it and was glad he took notice. I wanted to take him into my arms, have his mouth on mine while I ground my hardness into him.

  I definitely was a man with a crush.

  Could I win him over?

  I didn’t know. Even when I thought I saw interest, I wasn’t sure he would dive into something with me. His grumpiness covered his shyness when it came to our interaction. Did I risk pushing him when all we could have was the time we had together now?

  “Ryo, plans for the day?” I asked as we made our way towards the kitchen, having missed breakfast. My friend wasn’t only the head of security and my personal bodyguard, but he had taken on the role of my assistant as well. To be honest, I would be lost without him.

  “Besides the mountain of paperwork and requests from family members?”

  “Yes, besides that.”

  “Your uncle’s meeting is at 2:00 p.m. The Ito family head has called again and wishes to meet with you. Sensei has moved your training to 6:00 p.m.”

  Another full day. Another day I wouldn’t see Ruin, and already it had been a few since the party. It surprised me how much I missed seeing him, teasing him.

  “Any updates on Father?”

  “His heart has weakened even more. They’re saying any day now.”

  If he was any other man but the cold, cruel one I had been brought up by, I would have felt something when I heard those words, but I didn’t. Maybe I would when he did pass, but I doubted it. Although, any pain would be for my mother and her losing the one she loved.

  Voices drew my attention down the hall. Botan and Nobu stood outside the kitchen, so I knew who was inside, and my heart fluttered. Ruin. I liked the thought of seeing him so much, I smiled. However, after nodding to the guards, I paused and listened to their conversation.