Together We Stand

by JA Lafrance

  “I was—I am. Esme and I were very happy,” I replied honestly. “Until she became sick. She didn’t want us to treat her like she was sick. I tried but at nights as she slept, I wondered why the fates were so determined to take her. Now, it’s a struggle to keep her memory so Teddy never forgets her.”

  “That shouldn’t be hard.” Christine sipped from her mug. “You loved her. I think that’s the first thing you should make sure Teddy remembers. Then how she smelled, what her voice sounded like, the colour of her eyes. As long as you remember, she will too.”

  That was the best advice anyone had given me on that topic.

  “Are you happy?” I asked her.

  “Not as happy as you’ve been,” she replied softly. “I made some terrible decisions. I wish I could say it was because I was young but—”

  She took a few more swallows.

  “I thought I knew what I wanted and all I had to do was go for it,” Christine continued. “I mean, acting was my thing. But it was never going to happen. I’d broken too many hearts along the way and karma—she’s not a fan of that.”

  “I don’t think that’s how it works.”

  “Sure, it is.” Christine shifted to look at me. “There has to be some kind of consequence for what I did to you, and everyone else along my way. Having my fiancé tell me I’d let myself go. I mean, I went to the gym every day. I worked hard for this body. But it wasn’t enough. Then he was arrested and charged with running a prostitution ring and they went through every part of my life.”

  “They thought you were involved.”

  She nodded.

  “And you want to know what hurts the most? As they tore my world apart, the thing that hurt the most was realizing I’d given myself to someone who was giving what was mine to everyone. That every time he told me he loved me, he lied. And then I stopped to think what a horrid person I was because the girls he and his best friend exploited were in a hell of a lot more pain than I was.”

  I finished my coffee. “Come, we should get out of the cold.”

  Christine hesitated, but allowed me to take her hand and lead her into the house. I closed the backdoor, poured her another cup of coffee to warm her up, then set to work building the fire in the living room. I carried our jackets to the front closet then returned to find her standing in front of the fire.

  “I think about the life we could have had. If I’d taken just one second to think over what you asked.” Christine sat in the sofa and I draped the Afghan around her shoulders. Once she gripped the edges, I sat across from her. “But now as I hear people talk about the life you had with Esme and Teddy—I can’t feel bad. I’m sorry you lost her.”

  “I can’t tell you how many times in the last few years, people tell me, it’s better to have loved and lost, that never loving at all.”

  “How many times did you haul off and pop someone in the throat?”

  “Not enough?” I laughed. “Before she died, Esme told me it was now my responsibility to show Teddy how to love. Aside from loving Teddy with every beat of my heart, I have no idea how to do that.”

  “The word love, is simple enough.” Christine inhaled as she unfurled the blanket then folded it and set it beside her. “I always find the best way to teach kids is by leading by example.”

  I nodded.

  “Thanks for the coffee.” Christine smiled at me, her eyes more tired than they should have been. “I need to get back to work.”

  Again, I nodded, and she left me alone to my thoughts. Eventually, I made hot chocolate and a sandwich and brought the treats up to Teddy who was curled up in a fort made of blankets and pillows.

  “Permission to come aboard?” I smiled.

  “Did you bring snacks?” Teddy asked from inside her fort.

  “Aye.”

  “Permission granted!”

  I knelt and handed her the sandwich.

  “Thanks.”

  I found somewhere to set the hot chocolate down then rested on my back beside her. Teddy picked up one half of her sandwich and bit into it.

  “I think Christine is pretty,” Teddy said.

  I laughed.

  “You have to forgive her,” Teddy told me.

  “What do you know about it?” I asked softly.

  She set her sandwich down and cuddled into my side, resting her head on my chest. “Remember you gave me mom’s diaries?”

  “Mhmm.”

  “She has a quote in one—the one thing humans have that makes us better than the animals is forgiveness.”

  “Something else you should remember about your mom—she was very smart.”

  “She was?”

  “Yes.” I kissed her head.

  “Besides, I’ve braced myself for you dating someone,” Teddy admitted. “You’re not going to marry her tomorrow—but dinner can’t hurt.”

  I laughed. “How many pages do you have left?”

  She picked up the book. “About twenty or so.”

  “You can do this.”

  “Remember what we talked about.” Teddy tapped my shoulder. “The mom letter for my last birthday, she said darkness should only last for a night.”

  “Then the sun rises again.”

  Teddy smiled.

  I kissed her nose and climbed from her fort.

  Christine

  After a quick bite to eat at Primrose’s diner, I wandered to Kyle’s place and changed into my swimsuit. It was workout day to strengthened Mrs. Henderson’s muscles.

  “Okay, Mrs. Henderson,” I said, leading her toward the steps of the indoor wave pool. “Time to get out.”

  She smiled at me and gripped the metal banister. I assisted her out, helped her to dry with a towel then walked her back into her room where I could help her dress.

  “You did amazing today,” I told her. “Now, let me get you some fruits—”

  “And get me that book, please?” she asked.

  I smiled and picked up the romance novel she’d been reading. I also paused to grab her glasses and brought them back to her.

  “You know, my grandson is single,” she called as I headed for the door.

  I stopped to smile at her over my shoulder. “I know.”

  “And I understand what happened back in the day—you’ve grown up since then?”

  “I’d sure like to think so.”

  She smiled at me, slipped on her glasses, and opened her book.

  I wasn’t sure what any of that meant, but I left to do as I said I would. Once she was settled, enjoying her fruits and reading, I sat in the living room to finish up the day’s reports. I must have lost track of time for Kyle and Teddy returned, covered in snow. While they rushed into one of the bathrooms to clean up, I quickly started the fire and put the kettle on. It was whistling by the time they were dried off.

  “You made tea?” Teddy asked.

  “You really didn’t have to do that.” Kyle smiled.

  “I know. What’s going on out there?”

  “Well.” Kyle blew into his palms then rubbed them together. “You might want to pick one of the guestrooms. The storm is here.”

  “A storm?” I quirked a brow then tried looking out the back. I couldn’t even see the bench. “Ugh.”

  “It won’t be so bad.” Teddy beamed. “Each room has its own fireplace. Dad made sure when he designed the house. We don’t want you trying to drive home in that.”

  I couldn’t help touching her cheek gently. “But I don’t have any clothes here.”

  “I’m sure we can find something,” Kyle told me. “Nan was a fashionista in her day.”

  I laughed, looked out the back again. When I faced them once more, I nodded, accepting the offer of staying. During blizzards, signal for cell phones crapped out. The landline might work for me to call Bailey and let her know I’d be spending the night.

  When I did try, it was dead.

  Kyle, Teddy and I made supper, then, I wheeled his grandmother to the dinner table so she could eat with us. She was getting str
onger by the day.

  I was very sure that heart attack wished it had afflicted someone else.

  I smiled at the thought.

  Teddy filled the dishwasher and Kyle scrubbed the pots while I helped Nan prepare for bed. I left her with her book, a glass of water and the radio playing on some oldies station. I wasn’t even sure how that was happening. From time to time the signal faded out to static, but she didn’t seem to mind.

  Kyle was in his office when I was finished with his grandmother. He was standing by the window, staring into the howling whiteness of nature’s fury. His hair was brown, and he’d grown tall and fit. I wondered if my dark hair, blue eyes and curves would attract him now.

  “Um—I thought I’d take the room next to Mrs. Henderson.” I spoke after clearing my throat. “I figured that would be easier in case she needed me during the night.”

  “Nan will be fine.” He didn’t face me.

  “I don’t mind,” I admitted. “Look, Kyle, I’m sorry. I wish I had been a better human being to you. I just—I’m sorry.”

  He shifted to rest his bum on the windowsill and folded his arms across his chest. “Esme liked to say darkness only lasts for a night. Do you think all these years—do you think the sun is ready to come up yet?”

  I shrugged, shoved my fingers into the side pockets of my scrubs. “It depends on whether or not you forgive me or not.”

  A smile trailed his lips. “What do you think?”

  “I think it can’t be that easy.”

  “Sure, it can.” Kyle approached me. “How would you like to have dinner with me?”

  I tilted my head up to meet his beautiful eyes. They were still the same puddles of green they had been the day I’d reached into his chest and pulled his heart out.

  “Um…”

  He framed my face and lowered his lips to mine. I melted into his chest, feeling my mind fill with nothing but him.

  “What about Teddy?” I wrenched my lips back to ask.

  “She thinks you’re pretty and I should forgive you.” Kyle rested his forehead to mine. “Second chances, Chrissy.”

  “No one else has ever called me that,” my voice cracked.

  “A second chance.” He caressed my cheeks. “Are you in?”

  I was no fool.

  I kissed him again. “Dinner sounds nice.”

  About Kadian Tracey

  Born on the island of Jamaica, Kadian Tracey moved to Canada as a teenager. When not writing sweet romance or dropping bodies, she writes sexy stories under the pseudonym Kendra Mei Chailyn. In her spare time away from a day job, Kadian loves writing, movies, British cozy mysteries, travelling and food.

  www.kadiantracey.wix.com/romancenorth

  Essential Love

  K. Logan, Edits donated by Taylor Delong and Angie Martin

  When something or someone stands in the way of true love, do you fight your feelings or fight for your feelings? McKenna and Chris have both denied their feelings, other than a few moments of weakness where they give in. Will they finally give in and see where it goes? — Essential Love

  Essential Love

  McKenna

  I hate cars. Absolutely hate cars. My stupid car is dead as I sit in the parking lot at work, of all places. As I pray no one sees me, I decide to get out of my car and pop the hood and see if the problem is an easy fix. Being a country girl, I’ve worked on a few cars with my dad, and I know a few things. Very few, actually. Realizing this is far from my ability to fix, I pull out my cell phone to call Dad and see if he can tell me what to do. Then I notice the time and realize he will be in bed. I don’t want to wake him up, knowing he gets up with the birds.

  So, I go through the list of contacts I have, even though I know his number by heart. I don’t have to call Chris. It’s been months since we spoke and the last time, it didn’t go over so well. He was my best friend’s older brother. The bane of my existence and the asshole in my dreams at night. The last time we spoke, months ago, he kissed me to shut me up and walked away. He walked away! Who does that? And Andrew, well he hasn’t been very talkative lately either. Not that I am complaining, he found his love: photography. So, he’s been out and about trying to build his portfolio. This weekend, he is in Moncton for a carnival. If you ask me, there’s also a girl behind this trip, but that’s not my story. Breaking down, I dial Chris. One ring, two rings, three rings.

  “Hello?” I hear a girl say into the phone.

  “Um…Hi, is Chris there?” I ask timidly. Who could be answering his phone? Last I heard, he was single and not looking. Not like I check in on him, just the usual younger brother gossip Andrew gives me.

  “He’s just stepped into the shower, is there a message?” she asks, sounding very pissed off that another girl is calling him.

  “Yeah, this is Kenny, Andy’s best friend, and I need him to call me back right away. I’m having car trouble.”

  I realize I am rambling but then I hear him say, “Why are you answering my phone, Ana?” He sounds so cranky. Now I’m worried. Maybe he won’t help me. But then I hear him come on the line. “Kenny, what’s wrong? You don’t call me. Ever. So I know somethings wrong.” He sounds like he’s actually worried about me. Weird, as he’s never been concerned as far as I was concerned. Not 12 years ago when we met, and not 4 months ago, when he kissed me and blew my mind then walked away.

  Chris

  Why is Kenny calling me? I am not her friend, Andrew is. Truth is, I’d give anything to be more than her friend, but I value the relationship with my baby brother too much. I’ve watched her grow up the last 12 years and let me tell you, she grew up! And I know she watched me grow up. She always hid it well from Andrew, but I saw the stares, watched the breathing change. I knew. But nothing can happen. Andrew would never forgive me, even though he has no romantic feelings for his best friend. Nope, he loves her like a sister, thankfully. But because he loves her like a sister, I can’t even try. If I hurt her, he and I won’t be good and I don’t want that.

  “Um, I’m kinda stranded at the Superstore and Dad’s already asleep and I don’t want to wake him so I thought you might be able to come help me, since you’re a mechanic and all.”

  “Wow all in one breath Kenny, you must be desperate if you’re calling me,” I point out.” This, I know is true. She wouldn’t call me, especially after what I pulled at Boomer’s party all those months ago. Something I cannot stop thinking about even though I definitely should. It’s the reason I’m using every woman I see to try to forget the feelings it gave me. The reason Ana is here.

  That kiss. What was I thinking? Why did I act on instinct and kiss her, then just walked away, leaving her there? The kiss was spectacular, she was perfect, and what did I do? I fucking walked away from her. “Alright Kenny, let me get dressed and drop Ana off and I’ll come see if I can fix it to get you home. I might have to come tow it in the morning if I can’t get it done in the parking lot. I’ll see you in 15.”

  I hang up before she can say anything else. Her voice does something to me and I’m afraid I’ll spill all my secrets.

  I tell Ana we have to go, and I have to practically drag her to my truck. Ana glares at me in the seat of my truck as I’m pulling into her driveway. “Why do I have to go home? We didn’t even hook up yet?” she asks, yet, I’m not sure why. We’ve hooked up a few times over the years when we were younger.

  “Ana, tonight was a mistake. We shouldn’t be doing this, and you know it. You’re supposed to get married.” I throw that in her face as she puts her hand on the door handle to exit my truck. “I never want to see you again, unless you are with your husband. Ana, I mean it. We’re not kids anymore.”

  And we’re not. Next month, I turn 30. Never thought I’d live to see 30 but here I am. Between parties, racing, getting arrested, all the accidents that I have the scars from, I’m very lucky to be alive. God, the things I walked away from would blow your mind.

  I peel out of Ana’s driveway and head over to the superstore. The park
ing lot is lit up well, and I can see Kenny sitting on her hood, having a smoke. I roll my old Ford up and say, “Those will kill ya one day, Kenny.”

  She just shakes her head and has another puff, offering me one out of her pack. “I haven’t got paid yet this week, but I will pay you for coming out here and doing this. Until then, have a smoke or two on me.”

  Taking the smokes and lighting one up, I tell her to pop the hood and get to work, not letting the fact that she is near me get in my head because in my mind, I’ve already bent her over this hood six ways from Sunday.

  McKenna

  Being this close to Chris is really hard. While he’s working under the hood, I decide to sit in the car, put some space between us. The tension is high and after that kiss, I don’t trust myself to be around him. I’m playing Angry Birds on my phone when he shuts the hood.

  “Come on Kenny, I’ll drive you home and come pick this up in the morning.”

  Oh no, alone, in his truck with him?

  “Why Christopher, can’t get it going here? What’s wrong with it?” He looks me over, and the thoughts that run through my mind are not thoughts I should be having about my best friends’ older brother.

  “Your alternator is shot, Barbie doll. I have to take it to my shop and get it fixed.”

  I hate when he calls me this; he has done it since we were kids and I was pissed he stole my Barbie’s clothes.

  “Stop calling me that, jerk face. What will this cost me? I get paid in three days.”

  He smiles and says, “It’s on the house if you just get your ass in the truck and let me drive you home.” Chris has this old school Ford F150. The kind I remember my Gramps driving.

  “It’s not hard to climb in there, Barbie, you just step in like you do when you jump in Andrew’s truck.” I can hear the frustration in his voice. He’s trying hard to be nice to me. I can’t tell if he’s fighting sexual tension, or if I am just driving him crazy.