“You can’t make him marry me, Willard,” Emily insisted.
“No, but I was just thinking. Roderick said I could have the estate, along with you, when he left in the heat of his anger which, like I said, is in a way releasing you from your promise. If he thought he was going to lose you to me, he would do a fast enough turnaround.”
“What if he didn’t? Then you would end up with me, Roderick would hate you all the more, and me as well. That would only make matters worse!” Emily reasoned.
“It would teach him a good lesson to think before he speaks, though. He needs to think of the feelings of others, and how his words can hurt them. Play the game, Emily. When Roderick returns, pretend that his running off like that has turned you against him, and you have decided to consider marrying me instead. That should put him in his place. He would think he was losing you and his estate all in one fell swoop!”
“I fear your need to put Roderick in his place has gotten you into trouble before,” Emily reminded him. “I don’t want him calling you out on a duel, the same as he did James.”
“I’m as good a shot as he is,” Willard informed her.
“Which makes it all the worse! You could both end up dead!” Emily shuddered.
“You may be right, so I won’t accept a duel if he challenges me. Besides, duels are becoming much frowned upon by the authorities, and we could both get in trouble if we tried it. Although I must say, stupid men still try to do it on the sly.”
“I think it is a novel idea,” Lilith put in. “Roderick thinks he can just run off, and you will be waiting for him, hoping he will forgive you, for something you did not even do. If you are just a simpering lovesick sop of a girl, ready to fall back into his arms, it will merely give him permission to play these games in the future as well. You can’t allow him to treat you so rudely, and then just let him crawl back thinking he would still be in your good graces!”
“What if it backfires, though?” Emily wanted to know. “I would hate myself after words!”
“You are a lovesick sop!” Lilith announced. “If it backfires, he never loved you in the first place, and he doesn’t deserve you if that is the case!”
“You could be right,” Emily agreed.
“Think of it as a wager, Emily. You were always good at taking me up on my wagers,” Alfred interjected.
“And you know how that wager turned out on my 16th birthday. Had it not been for that stupid wager, Roderick probably would have offered for my hand for real. His father wouldn’t have had to force him into an unwanted marriage. James and Abigail would be alive today and have gotten married, and we would not have to be playing these games!”
“There’s no changing that now,” Willard pointed out. “So I guess that settles it. You will act like you have decided to marry me instead. Roderick will get so jealous, he will be honest with you, in order to get your trust back and beg you on bended knee to forgive him for his treatment of you. And if you are fortunate, maybe he will profess his love for you as well. Then I will release you from your promise to me, and he will mend his ways. What do you think?”
Emily felt uncomfortable about the idea, but she had to admit both Lilith and Willard may be right. Roderick had been cruel to turn and run away from her, just because she begged him to trust her with his inner feelings. How did he expect a woman to marry a man who did not trust her?
“All right. I will agree to the plan. I just hope it will make Roderick come to grips with his past and admit stronger feelings for me. If not, he most likely has no love for me at all!”
“Oh, mark my word, he loves you, and this plan of ours will prove it,” Willard assured her.
“I hope this is only play acting,” Lilith commented. “I would be totally envious if Emily ended up with both the best looking men in these parts.”
She smiled up at Willard, looking through her long lashes at him.
“Believe me, Lilith, I am only trying to make Roderick realize what he would be losing if he gave up Emily. Although she is a lovely lady, and would make any man proud to have her on his arm, I know she could never feel about me the same way she feels about Roderick. All the playacting in the world could not change that. So just remember, if you see me pretending to pay intimate attention to your dear friend, when this is all over, my attention will be free to be placed elsewhere.”
He gave her a smile and a wink, that told her his intentions all too clearly, which made Lilith feel better.
The butler announced dinner would be served shortly, so the group put away their cards, and went to dress for dinner. Emily thought about what Willard had suggested. She wished she did not have to play games with Roderick, but perhaps there was no other way to make him realize how much she meant to him if she meant anything to him at all. She was starting to doubt that he loved her the way Willard suggested. Maybe Willard was just using this as an excuse to stop Emily from marrying Roderick after all. She realized that she did not trust Willard or Roderick. How could she? She barely knew either of them.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Emily sat before her dressing table. She had not slept at all because her mind had constantly buzzed in circles in her head though out the night. First seeing the look on Roderick’s face when he left her there alone the morning before, and then the plan that Willard was suggesting she play. Trying to sort out her own feelings, was near impossible. Still, she felt confused. She felt like a cornered animal. No matter which way she turned, it may be the wrong direction. She could stay and play the game Willard suggested, when Roderick came back, and feel miserable, or she could just leave and forget about Roderick, and still feel miserable. After all, Alfred had all but offered for her hand. Could she be happy with Alfred? At least she knew him, and they had always been fast friends.
As she pondered over the problem, she heard a tap on the door, and then it was pushed open by Della. Emily raised her eyebrow at the maid because she had not sent for her.
“I came to see if you needed help getting dressed,” Della told her.
Emily shrugged. At this point, she didn’t care about the maid.
“Also I wanted to have a word with you.”
Emily knew it was highly improper for a servant to announce that they wanted a word with their employer. Seeing as how Della had never had any qualms about her behavior before, Emily was not surprised at her. She was just curious about what Della wanted to discuss.
“If you wish,” Emily said. “Say what it is you came here to tell me.”
“I would like to get some issues out in the open, which may be a little touchy for both of us,” Della spoke frankly.
“I know about you and Roderick…”
“He told me you did, and that he said he would put me aside. I want you to know that you can rest in peace for the time being. I cannot force my affections on Roderick against his will, but I will warn you. I know Roderick, and what he wants. He has a proper lady, agreeing to become his wife, which, of course, will bail him out, so to speak, considering he will lose everything if he does not get married. He needs you right now and will need you until you produce an heir, and he is on safe ground again. However, after he has gotten what he wants from you, he will come crawling back to me! You wait and see. I have known Roderick too long not to know what motivates him.”
She gave a little nervous laugh.
“I have seen him before, running after frilly petticoats, which he had no real interest in as he contemplated marriage to save his estate. He knew long ago that his father wanted him married, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do it, and he always came back to me. We would have gotten married long ago, had his father not insisted he marry a woman with social status or he would lose everything to Willard. Roderick despises women of social status. I think it had something to do with some uppity girl who snubbed him years ago. He swore he would never marry some snob of the ton. I believe that probably includes you. If he marries you, it will be for one reason, and one reason only.”
Dell
a gave Emily a bold look, then continued.
“ And we both know what that is.”
Emily felt outraged by Della’s forwardness, and then caught herself, realizing the woman was in love with Roderick. In a sense, Emily was stealing Roderick from her.
“I truly feel sorry about all this, Della. However, Roderick has little that he can do, other than what his father’s will demands. You nor I am going to change that fact. It doesn’t matter how you feel about Roderick, or how he feels about you. It is quite simple! He cannot marry you, but he can marry me! And if he does marry me, I will not allow him to have a mistress, so you had better start getting used to the idea if you want to remain here in his employ. Otherwise, I will insist he let you go. By then, I will be mistress of Windridge Hall, and be in charge of hiring or releasing the help.”
Emily realized this was almost a bluff since she didn’t even know if Roderick still planned to marry her. For the first time since Emily laid eyes on Della, she had lost her haughty superior look. Instead, she seemed very angry, and Emily could see the hatred sizzling in her usually cool blue eyes. Now they seemed to be on fire, but Della did not speak. She merely looked Emily up and down, then turned her back to Emily, and stiffly walked out of the room, apparently, changing her mind about helping Emily dress.
Emily had not realized how the episode had drained her until Della was out of the room. Then she suddenly felt weak and found herself sprawling on her bed, tears flowing from her eyes. What more was she expected to endure, she wondered? It was bad enough that Roderick left her like he did, but now the maid was laying claim on him, and she thought sadly, that maybe Della was right. Could it be Roderick could never love her or marry her, and he would spend his life trying to comfort his inner turmoil in Della’s bed?
Emily thought about her feelings for Roderick. She remembered how tenderly he had kissed her and touched her. She thought about the wonders he introduced her to, the night before he left. Did any of that matter? Could he just pretend that he enjoyed touching her, and kissing her? Or was it just his lust for her, she wondered? The only way she was going to find out was to play the game with Willard. Otherwise, she would always ask herself why Roderick married her if, in the end, he actually did marry her? Knowing at least what was before her, and what she must do, Emily felt at peace for the first time since she had met Roderick Winlock. She pulled herself up from the bed and got dressed. She would enjoy her visit with her friends until Roderick returned, and then she would cross that bridge when she came to it.
Emily met her friends in the breakfast room. The food was already out on the sidebar. The group was all helping themselves to the tempting affair of scrambled eggs, sausage, buns, jelly, fried potatoes, juices, milk, tea, or coffee, along with a variety of fresh fruit and cheese to choose from. Willard had his plate piled high, as well as did Alfred, and Lilith was just seating herself when Emily entered.
“We wondered when you were going to show yourself,” Lilith commented. “You look tired.”
“I didn’t get much sleep last night, and then I had a nasty conversation with Roderick’s mistress, whom he promised me he would set aside…”
“And she still remains under his roof? That is impossible, Emily! You should not stand for it if you marry him!” Lilith advised.
“I quite agree,” Alfred put in.
“Apparently, she has been in the household since she was a child. Roderick says he can’t remove her. Not after all these years, unless she is willing to go.”
“I know just the little maid you speak of, and Emily is right. Roderick can’t put Della out unless he can find another place for her in someone else’s house. Maybe he can send her over to my place, I could do with a friendly maid,” Willard chuckled.
“You must be just like your cousin!” Emily spat at him.
“Just trying to lighten the mood a bit,” Willard defended.
“Well, I think I need some fresh air, and I was thinking that after we eat, we should all go riding. I know Roderick has a stable chucked full of fine mounts since he showed them to me. After all, my father bought my horse from his stable, for my birthday, and I haven’t ridden since I sold poor Ebony!
“I think that is a splendid idea. I will have the cook pack a lunch for us and we can all have a picnic while we are out, and make a day of it!” Willard agreed
“That sounds like fun,” Lilith smiled.
“Yes, wouldn’t mind a little exercise myself,” Alfred added.
After breakfast, they all departed to their rooms to dress for their riding expedition, agreeing to meet at the stables.
Emily couldn’t wait to make her way out to the stables. Roderick had shown the horses to her before, and she was eager to become acquainted with all the horses quartered there. She had also met the stable-hand, who was no more than a boy but had a marvelous way with horses. His name was Jem and he seemed to enjoy having conversations with the horses as though they were human, like himself. Emily was especially interested in a sleek black hunter, which Roderick had told her was the sire of the horse her father had bought for her.
Now, while she was waiting for the others, she went up to the hunter, and stroked his head, as the horse stretched his nose out towards her over the door of his stall.
“He loves a kind word, ma’am,” Jem told her. “He’s gentle enough to look at, but once saddled, he’s like the devil himself, full of fire. That is why Lord Winlock calls him Lucifer. His father got the horse years ago to use for breeding. The man who owned him could not control him, and neither could anyone in this stable. Only the master, took over his training, and whenever Lord Winlock gets on the horse’s back, he is just like a kitten. No one else can get near enough to mount the beast.”
“You, knowing horses, Jem, must realize it is all in how you approach a horse,” Emily mused, as she stroked the soft muzzle of Lucifer. “Any horse will respond to the right touch. I presume that is why Roderick is able to handle him.”
Emily made up her mind that she wanted nothing more than to ride Lucifer.
“Well, Jem, my friends and Willard and I are all going to go out riding today, so you will need to saddle up some horses for us. I intend to ride Lucifer…”
Jem’s face froze in horror.
“Begging your pardon, Miss Emily, but I seriously advise you to change your mind. I do not want to be held responsible for anything happening to you. Turner would sack me for sure, not to mention what his lordship would do, if I let you ride that horse.”
“ridiculous, Jem. No one is going to hold you responsible. If Roderick can handle the horse, I can as well. After all, I have been riding his offspring for years, and Ebony must have a lot of the same blood and spirit, seeing as how she looked just like Lucifer here. Don’t put a sidesaddle on him though. I plan to ride astride.”
Jem just stood and stared at her.
“Don’t worry, Jem. I am an expert horsewoman. I have ridden more spirited animals than old Lucifer there. As I said, I used to own one of his offspring, and Ebony had plenty of spirit and then some.
“Only you have never seen Lucifer under a saddle before,” Jem insisted. “He is a different horse, I assure you!”
“You will let me be the judge of that. Willard will be riding with me, as well as my friends Lilith and Alfred. I assure you, no harm will come to me. They will all be out here soon, and you are wasting time, so please oblige me, Jem and saddle Lucifer at once.”
“I cannot do it, Miss Emily. I would have to ask Tanner first. If you were to be hurt, I could never forgive myself.”
“Tanner is nowhere in sight,” Emily pointed out. “I would not want you to feel any blame, Jem, so under those circumstances, I will just have to saddle Lucifer myself,” Emily informed him, and headed towards the tack room.
Jem ran after her to try and talk her out of her wild idea. It seemed no amount of coaxing or pleading would deter Emily from her purpose, so Jem begrudgingly agreed to saddle the horse for her.
Lucifer,
having been stabled for several days, was more than fresh and his excitement at the prospect of receiving some enjoyable exercise was almost more than Jem could handle. Emily stood at the horse’s head and cooed to him, stroking his glossy black neck as she did. This worked to sooth his excitement and he stood still while Jem cinched up the saddle.
By the time Willard, carrying the picnic supplies, and the others arrived, the horse was all saddled, and Jem was walking him in circles around the stable yard to settle him down before the ride.
“What is this?” Willard exclaimed when he saw Lucifer. “Is that crazy boy going to pass that horse off on you as a gentle mount?”
He gave Jem a disapproving glare.
“It is not my suggestion,” the already distraught young man defended himself. “I have tried all morning long to talk Miss Emily out of her notion of ridding Lucifer, but she will not heed a word I say. Turner is not around to put his foot down, and Lord Winlock is away. I had no choice but to obey.”
Lilith laughed.
“We know how stubborn Emily can be. Might as well let her have her way.”
“Emily, you are going to end up killing yourself yet,” Alfred put in. “She thinks she can ride anything with four legs,” he informed Willard. “It all started with a wager, and now it has gone overboard!”
Willard eyed Emily.
“Roderick may not have to worry about marrying you,” he drawled. “If you try to ride this hell of a horse, you may be in your grave before he ever returns!”
“Poo!” was all Emily said.
“Let her ride the damn horse,” Alfred suggested. “You will never talk her out of it anyway. I’ve seen her handle worse.”
“You haven’t seen Lucifer once a rider, other than Roderick, climbs on his back,” Willard warned.
Emily smiled at Alfred.
“Thank you for your vote of confidence, Alfred. Willard just doesn’t know of my ability, so I will have to forgive him for his lack of confidence in me.”
“We might as well saddle the other horses while Jem walks a little spirit out of Lucifer,” Willard finally suggested, seeing as how he could not make Emily see reason.
A Bride For Windridge Hall Page 14