Over the Rainbow

by Brian Rowe

  “Just stay in the car,” Mr. Balm said. “Nobody get out of the car. We should be fine. They can’t get in here.”

  The lion leaned against the hood and started smashing away the headlights with its paws.

  “It’s going to be okay,” Mr. Balm said, even though I didn’t believe him, even though he probably didn’t believe himself.

  I turned to the side window. The tiger stared right back at me.

  “Oh God,” I said. “They want to get in.”

  “They won’t!” Mr. Balm said. “Just stay calm, all right? Nothing’s going to happen!”

  Frankie put his head in his lap, and Judy barked at the tiger, like she had a fighting chance against the ferocious creature. The lion crawled up on the hood of the car.

  “What are we going to do?” I asked Mr. Balm.

  He stared at me. His face lost all its color. “We hope for a miracle.”

  A loud stomping erupted from the trees. For a moment, all went silent. The tiger turned toward the forest, and the lion leaped off the car.

  “What the hell was that?” I said.

  Frankie sat back up and looked out his window. The lion stopped a foot away from the car, and the tiger strutted back to the rear. Both stared in the same direction.

  “Do you see something?” Mr. Balm asked, his voice quivering.

  “Yes.” Frankie shoved his forehead against the glass. “There’s something out there. In the trees.”

  I didn’t see a thing. “What does it look like, Frankie?”

  “I can’t make it out. I can only see its feet. But it’s… it’s big.”

  “How big?”

  “Bigger than the lion and tiger.”

  I tried to catch a glimpse. I couldn't see anything. “Well, what is it, then?”

  “I don’t know,” Frankie said. “It could be a bear.”

  The lion and tiger growled at the forest.

  But the sound that erupted out of the third animal was the loudest and most impressive of all.

  “Lions and tigers and bears,” Frankie said.

  I tried not to panic. “Oh my...”

  “Lions and tigers and bears?” Mr. Balm asked.

  I squinted my eyes. I could see it now. “Oh my… God.”

  “What?” Frankie turned to me.

  “That’s not a bear!” I shouted. The creature emerged from the darkness, the size of an elephant, the large armored face of legends. “That’s a triceratops!”

  The dinosaur pounded its feet against the ground and released an earth-shattering shriek.

  “What the hell!” Frankie screamed. “Zippy! That looks like a dinosaur!”

  “It is a dinosaur, you moron!” I shouted. The triceratops marched straight toward us. I grabbed Judy and kicked open the side door. “Everyone, get out of the car! Now!”

  I held Judy in a death grip and leaped to the concrete. Mr. Balm followed, holding his backpack tight. Frankie exited the slowest of all, struggling to ignore the awesome sight before us.

  The Tasmanian tiger didn’t run after the dinosaur but instead stayed focused on us humans. It approached us and focused its gaze on Frankie, then on me. It opened its mouth to swallow me whole, just like the big bad wolf—but the triceratops swung its head against it and pierced the tiger’s skull with its humongous horns. Blood sprayed against the trees behind us, and the dinosaur flung the lifeless tiger up through the air, like a weightless stuffed animal.

  The cave lion approached the triceratops but didn’t allow it time to pounce; the lion jumped onto the dinosaur’s back and slashed at the top of its body. The triceratops yelled again. It jumped up and down, then spun in a circle, almost severing Mr. Balm’s head with its tail.

  A second triceratops, this one smaller than the first, galloped out of the trees. It raced toward its mother, head down and horns up. It leaped through the air, and landed on top of its mother’s back. It knocked the lion off and stampeded its artillery head against the animal’s body. The lion tried to fight back but the baby triceratops stomped on it, and smashed its face in.

  “This isn’t happening,” Frankie said.

  “This is insane,” Mr. Balm cried.

  And bloody. And gross. And shocking. And totally awesome. “This is amazing!” I shouted.

  “Zippy!” Mr. Balm shouted. “Get down!”

  “What?”

  “Get—”

  The triceratops swung its head sideways and pierced the Camry with its horns, catapulting the car up into the air, straight toward us.

  “Holy shit!” I shouted. The car flipped over us, struck the nearest tree, and rolled to the bottom of the hill.

  I waited for the dinosaurs to kill us, too, but they didn’t; they both shrieked, mother first, baby second, then trampled over the lion and tiger and raced down the road, around the corner, and out of sight.

  Silence ensued. Nobody said anything. The eerie chill in the air passed through me like a ghost.

  I was the first to stand. “That was a close one.”

  “I’ll say,” Frankie said. He stumbled to the side of the road, and vomited.

  “Are we okay?” Mr. Balm asked. “Is anyone hurt?”

  Frankie upchucked a few more times, then wiped his mouth. “I’m fine.”

  “I’m okay, too,” I said.

  “Good.” Mr. Balm rubbed the back of his neck and turned to his right. “Everyone’s fine. Except the car.”

  I stepped back onto the road. “Dinosaurs,” I said, like a child on Christmas morning. “Can you believe it? They’re back. They’re really back!”

  Frankie and Mr. Balm brushed the mud off their pants and stood up, not as excited as I was for the return of the Jurassic period. Judy appeared to my left, not flattened like a pancake, but still her adorable, feisty self.

  “I thought I saw a dinosaur yesterday,” Mr. Balm said. “It was this thin, sprightly thing running through the desert. But I thought it was my imagination.”

  “You guys just saw that, right?” I asked. “Two triceratops? I didn’t just dream that?”

  They both nodded, their faces lowered and glum.

  “All right, well, let’s keep going,” I said, the most chipper I’d been since my little drunken escapade. “Maybe we’ll get to see more of them. How cool would that be?”

  Mr. Balm grabbed my dirtied white dress and pulled me close. “Zippy! Are you insane? Do you have any idea what’s happening here?”

  “We just saw dinosaurs. It's incredible.”

  “No. Not incredible. We got lucky. I’m amazed we’re not all dead right now.”

  “You’re just heartless, Mr. Balm.” I slapped his hand away. “You see these creatures as the bad guys, but they’re not bad at all. They’re just trying to survive in a foreign land they’re not familiar with.”

  “That may be true,” he said, “but they can still kill us if we’re not careful. We’re not safe out here. We need to get out of these woods and find shelter fast. And you better pray we don’t see another one of those things. I can protect you from the saber-toothed cat, Zippy—but I can’t protect you from dinosaurs.”

  Mr. Balm strapped on his backpack and started speed walking down the road. He expected us to follow right behind him.

  Frankie sighed and reached his hand toward mine. “You coming?”

  I knew we weren’t safe, that death was, now more than ever, a strong possibility. But I wasn’t scared of the dinosaurs. I was undeniably and reliably thrilled.

  I took Frankie’s hand. “Of course I’m coming,” I said, and the four of us started walking along the narrow road to Portland.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  Sunday, June 13, 1999

  We didn’t see any dinosaurs for the next two hours—but we certainly heard some.

  I was ready to keel over from exhaustion. My joints ached, my eyes stung every time I blinked. Marching up and down the hills alongside the paved road was not my idea of fun. When we reached the top of the final hill, I sighed in relief. In the di
stance was a much flatter valley.

  “Excellent,” I said.

  “I’m amazed,” Frankie said. “I thought we’d just keep climbing forever.”

  “You kids getting tired on me?” Mr. Balm asked. “I’m the old geezer here, and I could walk another 100 miles, no sweat.”

  “Good for you.” Frankie leaned over and gripped his knees. “I’m ready for a nap. How much farther to Portland?”

  Mr. Balm didn’t respond. Instead he smiled and turned back around. He put his hand out in front of his head, to block the sun.

  “You need sharp eyes to see this,” he said, and pointed.

  I caught sight of them: a small cluster of tall buildings in the far distance. It didn't look 100 miles away, but it looked pretty far.

  “Up ahead is a town called Gresham,” Mr. Balm said. “We can jump on the MAX line and ride all the way into Portland. From there we can figure out how to get to Seattle.”

  “The MAX line?” Frankie asked. “What’s that?”

  “Portland’s transit system.”

  “How do you know all this?”

  “I used to live in Portland. Seattle, too. I used to have a life, you know. Money, a family.” He glanced down at me and smiled even wider. “And now here I am, stuck in the middle of nowhere with two kids, a puppy, and goddamn dinosaurs.”

  “We are not kids,” Frankie said. “I get that you’d mistake Zippy for one, though, since she looks about ten.”

  “Hey, shut up.” I pushed Frankie away, and scooted closer to Mr. Balm. “How much longer until Gresham?”

  “A few more hours,” he said. “We need to keep going, guys. It’ll be dark soon. We don’t want to be in these woods in the dark.”

  “I agree,” I said. I looked down at Judy, who still didn’t seem fazed at all. She barked, spun in a circle, then started strutting down the hill.

  “I don’t think I can go another few hours,” Frankie said. “I feel like I’m going to pass out.”

  I tugged hard on his arm. “Come on, Frankie. Be a man.”

  “You be a man. We’ve done nothing but walk for two days. How much can someone take?”

  I had to think of something to say to keep his energy up. “But just imagine what great shape you’ll be in for all the cute boys in Seattle!”

  He placed his hands on his back, and glared at me. “Are you saying I’m fat?”

  “No.” I wasn’t. Frankie was a big guy, but he wasn’t overweight, not for his height.

  “I think that’s what you’re saying.”

  “Dude, I’m just trying to say something to keep you moving.”

  “Whatever,” Frankie said. “It wouldn’t matter anyway. With my luck all the gay boys were probably taken in the rapture.”

  “What?” I said. “Think the opposite. According to my father, anyone with homosexual tendencies is going straight to Hell, so if that’s the case, God didn’t take any gay people in the rapture. I mean, we’re still here, Mira’s still here. We’ll outnumber the straight people a hundred to one!”

  “No,” he said. “It can’t be that simple.”

  “Oh, it can.” I locked arms with Frankie. “Let’s be gay. Gay and happy!”

  We continued walking along the side of the road, down the hill, Mr. Balm far up ahead.

  “You haven’t thought about it?” I asked. “I mean, I’m a decent, caring person. And I haven’t known you very long, but I can tell you’re a good guy, with morals and compassion. Almost everyone was taken on that plane, except us. Haven’t you wondered why?”

  “It’s not because we’re gay, Zippy. It can’t be. I mean, you haven’t even acted on your feelings.”

  “Sure I did. I got on that plane. I defied my father. I broke the fifth commandment, for God’s sake!”

  “Uhh, you just used the Lord’s name in vain. Isn’t that a commandment, too?”

  I glared at him. “You know what I mean.”

  “Whatever. We can talk about it all we want. The truth is we’ll probably never know.” A grin appeared on his face. “I suppose, though, if God did leave all of the queers behind…”

  I waited for the punch line. “What?”

  “The gays will rule the world.”

  I laughed. “Now wouldn’t that be the day—”

  Another loud roar echoed through the air, from the right. This one I felt not in my head or feet, but in my chest. We’d heard at least a dozen roars since our unexpected run-in with a pair of triceratops, but had yet to see another dinosaur. I thought about all the different kinds I’d be seeing soon, that I wanted to see more than anything. And, also, the ones I didn't.

  “No velociraptors, please,” I whispered.

  I expected Mr. Balm to address the roar, but he pretended like he didn’t hear it. “Guys, could you pick it up a little? We’re never gonna get there.”

  Frankie continued on, but I stopped. I crossed my arms and cleared my throat as loud as possible.

  Mr. Balm looked back at me. “What is it now?”

  “I don’t know. I was just curious, before we go any farther, if we could discuss... you know... the obvious?”

  “What’s there to discuss?” Mr. Balm asked. “Come on, we can talk about this later—”

  “We saw dinosaurs, Mr. Balm! Living, breathing dinosaurs! I don’t know about you guys, but the last time I checked, these guys went extinct sixty-five million years ago.”

  Mr. Balm shrugged, and said, “A minor detail.”

  “It’s like we’ve stepped into a real life Jurassic Park,” Frankie added, as if he were the first to think it.

  “It’s like we’ve stepped into a time machine,” I said. “I’ve been obsessed with dinosaurs ever since I was a kid. I’ve freaking prayed for a day like this my entire life. But now that it’s happened, I can't stop thinking about it.”

  “About what?” Mr. Balm asked, stepping toward me.

  “What dinosaurs back on Earth means. You know, to our future.”

  “Zippy, I told you. I’m going to do all I can to protect you.”

  “Protect me? Like you did with that tiger and lion back there? How’d that go?”

  He put his arms up in the air. “Hey! You’re alive, aren’t you?”

  “I’m just saying, we’re not safe anymore. The rapture would’ve been the easy way out. Now we have Tasmanian tigers, cave lions, a mean ass triceratops. What kind of a world is this?”

  Mr. Balm stared at me. He looked like he wanted to hug me, but he just stood there. “We won’t know until we find the others, okay? And trust me, there will be others.”

  “Like Mira,” Frankie said.

  “Like Mira,” I repeated. A smile returned to my face—but then it dimmed almost immediately. I looked at Mr. Balm, tapped my fingers against my cheek. “Why do you think the dinosaurs are here? Do you think maybe God accidentally dumped extinct creatures back on Earth... you know... when He took up all the people? Like, to make up for the missing population, or something?”

  “I have no idea, Zippy,” Mr. Balm said. “All I know is that, for whatever reason, the dinosaurs are getting a second shot at life. And so are we. There’s an explanation out there, somewhere. We just don’t know what it is yet. We have to keep pressing on, and if we bump into another dinosaur, so be it. We'll face it together.”

  “But what if a T. rex tries to stomp on us?” I asked.

  Frankie ran his hands through his dual-colored hair and darted his eyes at me, alarmed. “You don’t really think there’s a T. rex out there, do you?”

  “Why not?”

  “I don’t know,” he said. “I just, I couldn’t even imagine.”

  “Neither could I.” I turned to Mr. Balm. “I don’t know if I should be excited, or scared shitless.”

  “Be neither,” Mr. Balm said. “Just be on your guard. Both of you.” He started marching again. “Come on. Less talking, more walking.”

  Frankie raced past me like a roadrunner, having found his energy again.

  I
stood still for a moment. I watched as Mr. Balm and Frankie walked side by side. I looked down at Judy, who was waiting anxiously for me to join the parade.

  “And we’re off.”

  #

  In the next hour, only one car passed us—we tried to wave it down but the man swerved to the left and almost ran Frankie over. We found the bottom of the hill, but we were still surrounded by trees. After awhile I wondered if we’d ever escape the massive forest.

  “Hold on,” Frankie said, breathing hard. “I need to stop for a second.”

  Mr. Balm didn’t even turn around. “Not yet. We need to get to Portland. It’s going to be dark any minute!”

  “I need a break, too,” I said. “Just five minutes? Please?”

  “You’ve had plenty of breaks! Come on, guys.”

  I gave the man a cold stare. He sighed and marched back to us. He opened up his backpack and gave us bottled waters and a handful of almonds to share. “Two minutes.”

  I inhaled the dry, tasteless almonds and took a swig of the lukewarm water. They weren’t potato chips and rum, but they would do.

  I walked up to Judy and gave her the rest of my water. I kneeled down, let her lick the remaining drops. I looked past her. A large dirt trail veered off from the paved road.

  I pointed to it. “What’s that?”

  “What?” Mr. Balm asked.

  “This trail. Do you think it goes anywhere? A house maybe?”

  “I don’t know,” he said. He took a sip from his own water bottle, then zipped up his backpack. “We need to stay on the main road. It’s safer.”

  “Yeah? It didn’t seem very safe a few miles back.” I pulled on my sweaty white dress. It stuck to my skin like glue. “I want to get out of this dress. I hate this dress!”

  Frankie burped, then sipped more of his water. “But it makes you look so adorable.”

  “Don’t make fun of me,” I said, crossing my arms. “I’m not in the mood.”

  “You guys ready?” Mr. Balm asked, already continuing on his steady walk.

  “Yeah,” Frankie said. “I guess.” He followed.

  But I stayed put. I was the first to hear it. “Wait a second.”