Change My Mind

by Ali Parker

  I was the one who screwed up last night. It was up to me to clear the air. We had a few more weeks to work together. Important weeks that could not have the added distraction of a dysfunctional relationship. I took a deep breath. I hated to be the bigger person, but I had kissed him. I would set boundaries and apologize for what happened. I led him on. I certainly never meant to make him think we had a chance of being together.

  I closed my laptop and left my bedroom. Parker was just coming out of her bedroom. I smiled at her. At first, I was going to tease her about what I saw last night. I quickly thought better of it. She would want to know where I slept. I did not want to get into that.

  “Good morning,” I greeted.

  She groaned. “My head hurts.”

  “Do you want to go get coffee or make a cup here?”

  “I think I just want to go back to bed. Do you need me today?”

  I did and she looked pretty rough. “Why don’t I go get you some breakfast and coffee? It will make you feel better.”

  “I don’t see how. I don’t think I should eat anything.”

  “You need something in your belly. It will help soak up that alcohol sloshing around in there.”

  “I am never drinking again.”

  “We all say that, and in a couple of weeks, we will all be drinking again. New Year’s is coming. You can’t pretend you aren’t going to drink then.”

  “Where did you go last night?” she asked.

  Busted. “I came back here.”

  “You came back here at five. I happened to be up.”

  “Alone?” I asked.

  “What? Of course, alone!”

  I smiled, not believing her for a second. “I’m going to get that breakfast. Sit tight and don’t go back to bed. We do have a few things we need to go over.”

  “I thought we got the day off,” she whined.

  “No, other people get the day off. We have some stuff to do, and then maybe we can have the day off.”

  “Like what?”

  “We need to get ready for the Santa orientation tomorrow. That is going to be chaotic.”

  She groaned again. “Maybe I do want a drink.”

  I laughed as I walked out of the room.

  Chapter 22

  Chase

  The wind blew against my face as I bent forward, riding the smooth powder all the way down the mountain. It was so freeing. I felt like I was flying. It had been too long since I did this. I was going to make myself do it again and soon. Life was too short to waste it behind a desk all the time.

  I hopped on the lift and made my way back up. I was ready to do it all over again. I glided across the snow, making my way to the hill I was going to run when I noticed movement out of the corner of my eye. I turned and saw a curvy woman in blue headed my way. I looked again and realized it was Harper.

  I pushed up my goggles and smiled. “Hi.”

  “Hi,” she said, smiling.

  “I didn’t expect to see you up here.”

  “I’m off for the rest of the day,” she answered.

  “I think half the staff is on the mountain.”

  “We’re all taking full advantage of the boss’s orders to get a little rest before the big day.”

  “Good.”

  “I’ll race you down the hill,” she said.

  “Oh, that’s not a fair race.”

  “Because I’ll smoke you.”

  “Because I’ve been skiing a lot more than you have, I would bet. The odds are in my favor.”

  She finally saw my point. “You should probably give me a five-second head start.”

  “Not a chance.”

  We walked to the slope and got ready to take our turn.

  “Ready?” I asked her.

  She pulled her goggles down. “See you at the bottom.”

  She was off before I even got started. I took perfect form, racing down the hill. I knew I could beat her, but I didn’t want to do that. I slowed down when I started to catch up to her. She glanced behind her and burst into laughter before crouching low and giving it her all. I practically chased her down the mountain. When we got to the bottom, she pulled off her helmet. Her auburn mane fanned out. Her cheeks were red, and she had a huge smile on her face.

  “I beat you!” she exclaimed.

  “Yes, you did,” I said, a little out of breath. I pulled off my helmet and goggles and shook the snow off my face. I had been eating her dust. “Want to go again? Give me another chance to beat you.”

  “I can’t. I actually do have a few more things to do. I was hoping we could talk.”

  “Here?”

  “Can we grab some hot cocoa?”

  “Sure.”

  We made our way over to one of the stands and ordered two cups of hot chocolate. We left our skis on, moving out of the way of the crowd to somewhere a little more private. She sipped her cocoa. When a bit of whip cream clung to her upper lip, her tongue darted out and licked it off. All I could think about was her tongue in my mouth.

  “Last night was a mistake. I won’t pretend I was drunk or anything like that. It was a mistake and it can’t happen again.”

  “Oh,” I said for lack of anything better to say.

  “I don’t want you to get the wrong idea. I shouldn’t have kissed you. I probably shouldn’t have knocked on your door at all. It won’t happen again.”

  I nodded, feeling like a world-class idiot. She buttered me up coming up here. She wasn’t here to ski. She was here to tell me to stay the fuck away and she was doing it in a public place. I felt like a complete moron. I wouldn’t let her see how much she wounded me.

  “You’re right,” I managed to say.

  “Good. I’m glad you understand.”

  “Of course. We have to keep things professional. We have a big opening and we both need to have our head in the game.”

  “Right! Exactly. I’m so glad you agree.”

  “Yep.”

  “All right, now that we have that out of the way, I need to get back to work.”

  She bent down and took off her skis. I was right. She really did come up here to do one run just to talk to me. “You don’t need me for anything, do you?”

  “Nope, I have it under control.”

  “See you around then,” I said and skied off.

  I didn’t bother looking back. I hopped on the lift for another run. I was planning on going back to the resort to do some work, but not now. I didn’t want to be around her.

  I wondered if she had done it on purpose. Was it her way of paying me back for what I did to her all those years ago? I hoped not. I never intended to hurt her.

  The prom night was a way to break the news to her. I wanted her to know how special she was. I wanted her to know how much I loved her. I thought I could pamper her and show her it would all be okay.

  Damn, had I been wrong. She ended up hating me. No matter how many times I tried to talk to her about it, she ignored me. She wanted nothing to do with me. I ended up leaving the day of graduation. I didn’t stick around for any of the parties. I wasn’t in the mood to celebrate.

  I made one run after another trying to get her out of my mind. When the lights came on and the sun went down, it should have been my cue to leave. I didn’t. I couldn’t face her. I couldn’t put on a smile and pretend it was all okay. I was making my way back to the lift on legs that felt like rubber when I heard my name being called. I turned in the direction and saw Jake waving at me.

  “There you are,” he said.

  “What do you mean? This is where I’ve been. I didn’t know you were looking for me.”

  “It’s seven o’clock. You’ve been out here all day.”

  “Yes, and?”

  “And you are going to freeze to death.”

  “I’m plenty warm.”

  “It’s time to come in.”

  “I don’t want to.”

  I realized after I said it, I sounded like a petulant child. He folded his arms across his chest. “Plea
se don’t tell me that is your best argument.”

  “I want to do one more run.”

  “It’s late. Let’s go inside and have a drink.”

  He was right. I was exhausted. I needed a stiff drink to warm my blood. “Fine. In my room, though. I don’t feel like socializing.”

  “That works for me. We’ll grab some dinner.”

  “I’m starving.”

  “Me too.”

  He was kind enough not to ask me about the reason why I was punishing my body on the ski slopes. I went straight to my suite and took a hot shower while Jake collected the whiskey and food. With the blood pumping through my veins again, I realized just how cold I had been.

  “There you are,” Jake said, walking into the suite. “You had a Smurf thing going on there for a minute. I wasn’t sure I was going to be able to thaw you out before the opening.”

  “I guess I lost track of time,” I murmured.

  I took the bottle of Honey Jack and opened it. I poured two glasses for us and settled in on the couch with the hot pizza in front of me. I was famished. I took a couple of sips, letting the whiskey flood the icicles in my veins.

  “Feeling better?” he asked.

  “Much. Thanks.”

  “That’s what assistants are for. We have to keep our bosses alive. It’s bad for business if they die on our watch.”

  I smirked. “I would imagine so.”

  “What happened?”

  “When?”

  “I’ve worked with you for a while now. I’ve never seen you get that up in your head before. Something has you riled up. Is it the grand opening? If so, I have to tell you, don’t worry. It is shaping up to be perfect. Everything is planned and ready to go. There might be a few hiccups, but we’ll be ready for it. It’s going to be fine.”

  I refilled my glass. It was the boss’s turn to get drunk. “It’s about falling in love with the wrong girl.”

  “How is it possible to fall in love with the wrong girl? You fall in love with who you were supposed to fall in love with. It isn’t right or wrong. Our hearts don’t follow rules.”

  “It’s wrong when the love is unrequited.”

  He shrugged. “Sometimes, you have to work a little harder. I don’t believe it can be wrong. Your heart recognizes something that our brains are too stubborn to see. We have too many prejudices and set too many boundaries on who we can and can’t be with. We see things a different way than our heart does. Our hearts are all about love. You don’t fall in love with every person you meet. Your heart isn’t wrong. It’s selective. When you find the one you’re supposed to be with, let it happen.”

  I stared at him for several seconds. “What the hell did you just say? Is that out of Cosmo or something?”

  He smiled and took a drink. “I’ve been doing a little soul searching myself lately. I realized there is no right or wrong.”

  “I don’t know. I know how I feel, but what if it’s not real?”

  “Does it feel real?”

  “It feels real, but I wonder if she is really the one for me.”

  “Harper?”

  “How did you know?”

  He rolled his eyes. “Everyone knows. It’s pretty obvious.”

  “Well, there is nothing to know. She’s made it pretty clear she doesn’t want me. My heart may have gotten its wires crossed. What it thinks is right may not be taking into consideration her own heart.”

  “I doubt that. Maybe you need to make the message a little clearer.”

  “I think I have made it pretty damn clear.”

  “Does she know how you feel?”

  I didn’t know when we had come to this stage of our relationship. I wasn’t really used to getting love advice from another dude. Cori did it all the time but never a guy. “I think she does.”

  “Ah, that means she doesn’t. You need to up your game.”

  “I don’t know. Maybe she’s not the right one. We’ve had a hit and miss twice now. I have to wonder if it’s for a reason.”

  “I don’t know. Have you ever felt like this about anyone else?”

  “No,” I answered right away.

  I had dated lots of women when I was going through my playboy phase. None of them sparked any kind of real joy or excitement. They were warm bodies. Nothing more. I tried really hard to like some of them, but it just never clicked. None of them were her. None of them laughed the way she did or smiled when she was about ready to chew my ass. It was all the little things that added up to one really big thing.

  “Then the chase is on.” He grinned as he reached for the bottle. “It’s time to set your sight on the woman and make it happen. Chase her. Don’t let up. She wants to know just how much you want her. If you give up, she’s going to see you weren’t all that serious about her. You have to take her rejection and keep coming back for more or she’s going to think you were playing games with her. This is especially important because this is your second time around with her. I don’t know what happened the first time, but clearly, you fucked up.”

  “How do you know it was me that fucked up? What if it was her?”

  He gave me a dry look. “Yeah, I doubt that.”

  I smirked and took a drink. “You’re right. I fucked up, but it wasn’t intentional. I’ve said I was sorry.”

  “Have you?”

  I thought about it and realized that maybe I hadn’t said I was sorry. I didn’t feel like I had to be sorry. I didn’t break up with her. She broke up with me.

  Chapter 23

  Harper

  I felt like I should have been wearing a bright orange vest and a whistle around my neck. The day was chaotic. More than chaotic. It was a flurry of activity that made my head spin, and I was used to the hustle and bustle of a Black Friday sale.

  “Over here,” I shouted to be heard over the forty men that all looked very similar. “I need everyone that is here to be Santa over on the left side of the lobby.”

  “We need cattle prods,” Jake muttered in my ear.

  I shook my head. “We should have staggered their arrivals.”

  “Lesson learned. I’ve only ever had to deal with one or two Santas at a time. I had no idea they could be so unruly.”

  He stuck his fingers in his mouth and let out a loud whistle. That got their attention. “The floor is yours,” he said.

  “Thank you.” I took a deep breath and raised my hand in the air. “We have a table right over here. If you can all line up, we’ll get you your information packets and room assignments.”

  “We were promised our own rooms,” someone shouted.

  “Bullshit,” Jake coughed into his hand.

  “We cannot provide private accommodations. This was clearly outlined in the contracts each and every one of you signed.”

  “Stand tall,” Parker encouraged. “You tell ‘em.”

  I hadn’t known what I was getting myself into. I should have thought it all through much better. “Harper,” I heard Chase calling.

  I turned to see him coming from one of the conference rooms with Cori hot on his heels. “What is it?”

  “We need you to do the orientations,” he said. “I can’t do this, and Cori doesn’t know what to do.”

  “I’ll take over here,” Cori said. “Go help him before he loses his mind.”

  He did look a little frantic. “Get everyone signed in. Give them a packet, nametag, and a room key then send them in to me, groups of ten. Give me fifteen minutes for each group. The others can take advantage of the snack table while they’re waiting.”

  The three of them nodded. For one brief moment, I felt like I was in control. The moment was fleeting when I heard a loud argument break out between some of the Santas.

  “I’ll handle it,” Jake said and walked into the chaotic scene.

  “You, with me,” Chase growled.

  I followed him back to the conference room. He was in a foul mood. I was chalking it up to the stress of the day. I stood in front of the room and waited for the men
to make their way in. I smiled and greeted them all. They sat down, some of them joking with each other.

  “All right, everyone, we only have a short time to cover a lot of ground,” I said.

  Some of the conversations continued.

  “Excuse me,” Chase said loud and clear.

  That got their attention. I began to go through the packet, outlining the tasks they were expected to perform. There were a lot of snickers and jokes. “This seems like stuff an employee would handle,” one of the men said.

  I looked at Chase and then the group. “Yes, you are an employee. You are acting as the concierge.” Judging by the blank looks on many of the faces, I realized some of them had no idea what a concierge did. “You are there to provide information about dining times, sights, offer help scheduling spa treatments and so on.”

  “Ha. I suppose we’re supposed to be babysitters as well.”

  “Actually, you are supposed to provide them with information about the daycare and offer the private nanny service.”

  “What the hell is all this about?” one of the men asked. “We’re supposed to play Santa. We don’t do all this stuff.”

  “Did you not read the contract?” I asked.

  It was pretty clear most of them hadn’t. They thought they were going to get free room and board while sitting on their ass for a few hours a day.

  “You want us to be bellhops?” someone asked.

  “If that’s what your room occupants ask of you, yes.”

  The mumbles and complaints amped up. I turned to Chase, looking for help.

  He clapped his hands together. “All right, let’s run through some scenarios and we’ll show you what is expected of you.”

  “Are we play acting or are we doing our jobs? You guys realize we play Santa. We’re not actually Santa.”

  “You,” I said, pointing at the man speaking. “Please, come here.”

  That shut him up. He got to his feet, adjusting the suspenders that framed his authentic jelly belly. “What?”