by Eden Rose
It has to be fucking Flip.
Flip is one of those guys that has a heart of gold and everyone fucking loves him. Including Britney. This is just another stab at me that proves she was never mine to begin with. Even though I want her to be, I have never had her to begin with.
“No reason. Get me another shot,” I retort and down the two that are in front of me. The amber liquid burns all the way down my throat but it feels good. I light the blunt that is in the front pocket of my cut and take a big hit off of it.
“What are ya gonna do about this?”
Rabies claps me on the shoulder and looks over at Britney who is staring at Flip with love in her eyes. I’ve known for a long time that Flip has had a thing for Brit but what I don’t know is if they’ve done anything about it until the other night. Since the minute she showed up at the clubhouse, Flip has been panting over her but she was interested in me until I shut her down.
“Dude, tell me about it. This fuckin’ sucks. We need to get out of here and get some fresh pussy,” he says to me with fake excitement in his voice.
“What’s your story, anyway? You ever had a lady? Or something?” I ask him, desperate to change the subject from me to him. Anything to draw the attention away from me.
I know exactly what he’s feeling right now but I don’t say anything more. No, I sit here with my shots of Jack and watch the woman that constantly has me by my balls flirt with my brother.
“I’m going to kill him,” I murmur under my breath and swallow back my shot.
“Don’t do anything rash, man. It’s not like she’s claimed or anything. You’ve got no say over what she does and who she does it with. Just like me. I’ve got no say over her and whatever the fuck she does.”
“So, there was someone!” I call out like I solved the case.
“Oh my God! Flip!” Britney squeals as Flip picks her up and spins her around in a circle. Her red hair is making a circle around her and my heartbeat speeds up.
Of course, she would have to be beautiful. Why couldn’t she be fucking ugly? Make this a little bit easier on me or something. No, she’s got to be the most beautiful woman that I have ever seen in my life and she wants nothing more from me since I’m about to break her heart.
Leaving the bar, I walk towards the back where the garage is set up. I know that Brit and Flip are walking around but I’m doing everything I can to not have to talk to either of them. So what if it makes me a fucking coward? You would be too if you had to identify the body of your dead sister too.
I throw open the door to see Flip and Britney standing there with big smiles on their faces. Brit strolls over to me and throws her arms around my shoulders to hug me. Her lips hover below mine but I don’t make a move to kiss them.
How could I have something so beautiful in my life and I know it’s just doomed? Everything about Britney and Aidan is perfect but I’m just a piece of shit. Look at what today is going to bring. We invited our women and children to this engagement party where we know a fight is about to break out. We know exactly what is about to happen but we did it anyway.
The plan is to have some of the brothers guarding the gates to get into the clubhouse ready for them to come in. We want to stop them from entering but we have to get them over the boundaries of the clubhouse.
Her face falls but I turn my head to Rabies without saying anything to her. I can’t bear to see the look of the denial on her face; if I do, I’m going to cave and beg her to be with me.
“I love you,” Britney murmurs as I walk away.
I spin on my heels to turn back to look at her. “What did you just say?” I bark out. There’s no way that I heard her right. She couldn’t possibly love me.
Her beautiful freckled face nods gently. “I love you,” she repeats but louder this time.
“Well that’s the stupidest fucking thing you could ever have done,” I utter before leaving the hallway.
“What the fuck is your problem?” Flip calls out to my back.
I don’t turn around. There’s no way I could see the damage that I have caused the most beautiful person in the world. There’s no way in hell that I could stand knowing that I’m the reason why she’s probably doubting everything about her.
It’s all me.
I’m the selfish prick who can’t protect the one woman in the world that I’m supposed to and I’m the selfish prick who pushed away the love of my life.
Hell, I shoved her into the arms of Flip.
And I’m going to let him take her. It’s time for me to stop fooling myself and them into thinking that I’m some kind of stand-up guy.
FLIP
Mack Truck has been avoiding me all day. I’ve tried talking to him a few times but he gives me a blank stare before looking away. I know what he’s doing and it’s not gonna fucking work with me. He’s trying to distance himself from us and its bull shit.
Neither Britney nor I did anything wrong.
I’m not going to lie to you, it fucking kills me that Britney told Mack Truck that she’s in love with him before telling me that she loves me. What is it about him that has her so attached? The guy is fucking a dick. He treats her like a piece of ass and I’m over here trying to be with her. This is fucking horse shit. That bastard doesn’t give two shits about her and I’m so in love with her that I can’t breathe.
The look on her face when Mack Truck told her that loving him was stupid, about killed me. I wanted to punch my brother in the face for being such a dick but I didn’t want to stress Brit out even more. Instead, I wait until she’s busy setting something up before I go and confront him.
I knock on his door and wait for him to answer. After a couple of seconds, I don’t hear anything and I knock again. Still nothing. That fucking prick. I gear up and kick the door open. I feel the strain in the back of my thigh muscle.
The asshole is sitting on his bed with a fifth of Jack sitting next to him. “What the fuck are you doin’ in my room?” He demands.
I get up in his shit. “I want to know why the fuck you’re messin’ with our girl like this.”
He shrugs me off. “I thought this is what you wanted all along. You know? To have her to yourself. Send me a wedding invite.”
My fist forms and plows into the side of his face before I even realize I’ve done it. “You fuckin’ coward.”
Mack Truck jumps off the bed and grits his teeth. “I don’t love her, man. She’s a good fuckin’ lay. That’s it. Have fun with her and playin’ daddy.”
“What did you just say?” A feminine voice says from behind me.
I know the voice without even turning around. It’s the voice of an angel whose heart is about to break into two.
My brother, and old best friend, has the nerve to look unaffected by what he just claimed. I’m shooting daggers at him right now and he’s looking at me and her like we’re the ones in the wrong.
He steps forward towards her but I step between them to stop him from touching her. “You think we were gonna live happily ever after?” He asks her.
Brit shakes her head back and forth. “No, I expected you to not be a fucking coward!” She bellows with her chin wobbling. I can tell that she’s trying to hold herself together but she’s barely doing it. “I expected you to finally realize that we could have been something great. Or did you just want to fuck me one last time with your brother?”
MACK TRUCK
The damage is already done and there’s no coming back from this. The woman that I’m in love with is about to realize how big of a piece of shit I am and run into the arms of Flip. I let her do it, too. Fuck, I shoved her his way.
To seal the coffin of my life and any future I have with Britney, I tell her the one thing that I know will push her away. “You were just a hot piece of ass and-”
The sting of her slap is what stops me from saying another word. “You fucking coward!” She screams loudly in my face. Her eyes are red from the tears that are pooling down her face. “You fucking coward. I should
have known that you were just a dick. All you care about is fucking people and not giving a shit about how they actually feel. That’s all you are. Just a man with a dick and no heart.”
Thoughts of Kayla’s broken and bruised body stabs at me. Over and over again. The one person that counted on me more than anything, and I let her down. If I can let my own sister down, then I’m going to let Britney down too. Hell, her son shouldn’t even be near me. I’m the worst fucking person for them.
“You think I want to be with someone that’s been with with all my brothers? You think I want a fuckin’ ol’ lady that’s got a loose pussy?”
The blunt force of Flip’s fist in my face has me staggering backwards. He fucking plowed my face with his fist and I’m seeing stars. My back hits the wall with a thud and my head hits said wall.
“Fuck you, dude! I don’t know what the fuck your problem is but you have got to slow your roll before you miss out on the most important person you’ve ever had in your life. Also, your friend and brother. I never want to hear you sling that shit again at my woman,” Flip seethes.
Britney’s body is shaking with her sobs but it’s her face that makes me wince more than anything. She’s shooting me with looks of disbelief and horror.
Believe me, sweetheart, I’m doing you a favor.
“I… I can’t believe you feel that way. So you can fuck me and make me fall in love with you but you can’t own up to it? You just think I’m a whore? Is that really all that you think of me?” She asks me, insecurity lacing her words.
I did this to her. I finally got what I wanted and that was her unconditional love. I finally got what I wanted and that was to push her away from dealing with the sick world of my mind. I got everything that I wanted and now I feel as if I lost everything.
I need to finish this before I beg her to take me back. I need to finish this before I get on my knees and tell her how I feel about her. I need to finish all of this before I tell her how much I love her and cherish her.
I push myself off the wall and stagger over towards Flip’s raging body. He’s heaving his chest up and down. I look at him in the face, even through the black eye that’s forming on my face. “Why would I want to be with some bitch who wants to fuck everyone that walks? Who can’t choose between me or my brother? I don’t want a wishy washy bitch.”
And then, his fist goes through my stomach. The force of his hit has me bowling over to help soothe some of the ache that is forming. It doesn’t compare to the pain that I’ve caused Britney. I solidified everything that she was worried about and now I’m going to have to live with it.
BRITNEY
“I never want to see you again,” I seethe at Mack Truck. The man that I once loved and cherished is now the man I want to kill. I fucking hate him.
I hate him for the lies he’s spewing. I hate him for being a coward and for giving into the desires that I once had for him. I hate him for all of this bull shit that he’s spreading.
Worst of all? I hate him because I don’t hate him.
The look on his face when I turn on my heels to go marching towards the courtyard to get my son will be forever engrained in my mind. He looks relieved, almost accomplished.
I feel my heart literally cracking in a million pieces at this moment.
Silly me for thinking that we actually had something that meant something. Silly me for thinking that he was going to be different. It’s true, he never once gave me any indications that he wanted something more with me. Not one.
He was perfectly fine with taking my body and playing me like a fiddle and not wanting anything more from me. Why didn’t I listen to myself from the beginning? I should have known that he was going to use me and not want me.
Out of nowhere, someone’s grabbing my shoulder and yanking me back. I spin to see it’s Flip’s gorgeous and loving face looking at me. The tears that I have been trying to keep in, come flooding out my eyes.
“Precious, he’s a fuckin’ dick,” he tells me with malice in his voice.
My eyes follow the lines of his body to see his hands that he has balled by his hips. His knuckles are red with blood and his skin is pulled away from them showing me that he had fought. I grab his hands in both of mine and examine them. “What the hell happened?” I ask him while looking at his knuckles.
I know the guys are violent but I have never seen them fight each other like this. “That fuckin’ prick of my brother deserves a lot more than he got,” he replies with vengeance. “That mother fucker.”
“I’m so sorry,” I whisper. This is all my fault. If I wouldn’t have assumed anything, this wouldn’t have happened. “Everything is my fault and now I’ve come between brothers.”
Flip yanks his hands out of my mine and grabs my face. His eyes are blazing with passion and something else that I haven’t seen before. Love, maybe? I’m not sure but I like it.
I like it a lot. I like the fact that he’s looking at me more than just a piece of ass like Mack Truck did. I love the fact that he’s looking at me like I’m something important to him rather than just a couple of holes.
“Not one thing about what just happened is your fault. If you say shit like that again, I will beat your ass. You get me, precious?”
His fingers gather the tears that are spilling out of my eyes. Each tear he pushes out of the way, he smiles a little for me to show me that it’s okay. That it’s going to be okay. Flip kisses right underneath my eyes and then shakes my shoulders with his hands. “Stop being sad over that asshole, baby.”
“It’s not that easy,” I retort stubbornly. It’s not easy at all. “Was I just a conquest or something? Was he just jealous over me liking you?”
“You like me?” He asks me with a cute smile on his loveable face.
No, I love you, you big idiot.
I shrug. “Yeah, I guess I like you. I mean, you have a nice dick. Plus, you are fucking amazing in bed,” I reply hoping to change the mood into a happier one.
I’m still upset over what Mack Truck had said to me but I’m more upset over allowing myself to believe that the three of us could have a happily ever after. What kind of woman does that make me?
He smirks on the cute face, showing me his dimples. “I do love your tight pussy and your tight ass, baby.”
My eyes bulge a little and my mouth drops. “That’s it?”
“Ahem!” Someone clears their throat from behind us.
I look over my shoulder to see Jen with her hands on her hips and a smirk on her face.
Shit! Do I have racoon eyes from crying? This day couldn’t possibly be worse after all that shit with David and now Mack Truck. Now Jen has to see me?
I could just die from embarrassment right now. Carefully tucking my head into Flip’s crook of his neck, I mentally beg for the floor to open up and swallow me whole.
Jen and Chantal both look perfect at all times. With their perfectly styled hair, makeup that makes their eyes pop out and full lips that would make Angelina Jolie jealous. And then there’s me.
A frizzy redhead. Freckles. And a blotchy face from crying over her pathetic life.
Also, the fact that my world got shattered twice today. What is it about today that has everything getting so fucked up? First David and now Mack Truck?
“You are supposed to be helping us decorate,” Jen exclaims with her arms flying out in the air.
I tuck my face deeper into the crook of Flip’s neck and breathe him in. There’s something comforting about being with Flip. Like, he just makes everything fucking better.
He rubs his hands up and down my back gently to calm me down. “I’ll be out in a minute,” he rasps. His baritone voice rumbles from his chest to mine.
“Mommy!”
Shit! Aidan can’t know that I’m upset about something because he’d probably think it had something to do with his dad. The last thing that I need is for him to think his dad is upsetting me because then he might turn on him. That is one thing that I have prided myself in, not blaming
David for everything or talking shit about him.
“You gonna be okay, precious?” Flip whispers to me just for me to hear.
I nod and uncurl myself from his body. Instantly, my body cools from the body heat from his. I miss the smell of his leather, the hand sanitizer that he drenches his hands in constantly, and the smell of his cologne. He smells like Flip.
Fucking delicious.
“Hey, baby. If I flip a coin, what are the odds of me gettin’ head?” Slice asks with his arms out like he’s waiting for a hug.
I burst out laughing. That was exactly what I needed right now. A distraction from all the fucked up-ness of my life.
Jen giggles while pushing her hair back behind her shoulder. Even though she’s pregnant, she’s still fucking gorgeous. I wish I could pull off blue hair like she can because it’s amazing. “What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree?” She murmurs huskily. She’s got that perfect I just had sex voice that would rival Marilyn Monroe.
“Uh,” Flip starts and then looks over at me. I shrug because I have no idea what she’s talking about.
Slice rolls his neck to have his hair go to the other side of his face. “What did the hurricane say?” He asks with sex dripping from his words.
Shit! No wonder she’s pregnant. I’ve only been a part of this conversation for a few minutes, and my thighs are already shaking a little bit. If it weren’t for Aidan standing here next to me, I wouldn’t be held responsible for my actions.
She walks over to him in a sexy way with her hips swaying from side to side. I don’t swing that way, but she’s got me checking her out. “Hold onto your nuts because this will be a wild blowjob!”
My eyes widen and I blurt out a giggle. Then Aidan tugs on my shirt reminding me that he’s standing here waiting for something.
“What’s going on, Aidan?” I ask him trying to cover my amusement of Jen and Slice up.
Flip’s got a crazy smile on his face too showing me that he’s not immune to their crazy antics.
Slice throws his head back letting out a throaty laugh that shakes his whole chest. He’s got this contagious laugh that makes everyone around him laugh too. Even Aidan.